US Air Force inks deal with Raytheon on Windows 10 (and other) support for ARSE

The US Air Force (USAF) has declared it is awarding a contract to Raytheon thanks to its pressing need for "full ARSE compatibility", including Windows 10 support, with equipment designed for maintaining fighter jet missiles. Raytheon Missile Systems will be the proud beneficiaries of the USAF's latest Advanced Medium Range …

[Dave K]

Hope it doesn't turn into a bum deal for them. Windows 10 can be a real pain in the posterior at times - especially when you're up all night under a full moon fixing issues until the crack of dawn arrives.

IGMC...

[ChrisPVille]

Next

Some poor soul is going to get Special High Intensity Training for this. They might as well charge it through the ARSE contract while they're at it.

[Fungus Bob]

Re: Next

is the optional ARSE Combined Re-Arming Control Kit

[zuckzuckgo]

Re: Next

>"is the optional ARSE Combined Re-Arming Control Kit"

No, but they will AMRAAM your ARSE for you if your into that kind of thing.

[Korev]

Butt the cheek of it!

[macjules]

Well, I guess someone must be very good at explaining all of this. Or could it be said that they are good at talking out of their ARSE?

[Francis Boyle]

They

went there. Next stop FECKIN.

[adrianww]

Re: They

That’ll be the Frontline Emergency Combat Kit that they’re working on.

Combined with the Dynamic Response Inflight Night Kit, they should have most of the bases covered...

[Dave Hilling]

Re: They

Some one get me the FeckIT and DrinKIT

[Chris G]

I am assuming

ARSE is plug 'n' play?

[Pete 2]

What use is an arse?

> "The contractor shall integrate the necessary software for full ARSE functionality on Government Furnished Equipment (GFE) ARSE systems

Right. So they will use ARSE to Better Optimise The Testing Of Missiles

It makes complete sense now.

[Cederic]

Top Gun is not geeky

Really? Please. Top Gun is 'fast shooty things', nobody with a serious aeronautical interest would consider it more than a nicely shot fluff piece.

[Korev]

Re: Top Gun is not geeky

Someone's a bit arsey today...

[Mike Moyle]

Re: Top Gun is not geeky

"Really? Please. Top Gun is 'fast shooty things', nobody with a serious aeronautical interest would consider it more than a nicely shot fluff piece."

Just so you know; Tom Cruise as a Fluffer is emphatically NOT an image I needed today!

(Or ANY day, really...!)

[DarkLordofSurrey]

Someone will find a giant hole in this contract then the proverbial will hit the fan...

[Anonymous Coward]

They'll find the hole later. First they will discover a large crack...

[LenG]

Win 10 on missiles?

Can somebody please recommend a reliable installer of bomb shelters??

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Win 10 on missiles?

I have one of those. The trouble is, it runs on Vista...

[eddiejp]

Sounds great, but...

I wouldn't want to be the ARSE Hardware Operations Lead Engineer.

[veti]

Re: Sounds great, but...

My former boss was less than overjoyed when he realised his job title had become "Analytics Manager".

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Sounds great, but...

Our MD decided to "rebrand" our Senior Sales Managers to Business Unit Managers.... Even after that was pointed out to him.

[Anonymous Coward]

Windows 10 in the Military near the frontline?

I really, really, really hope that

1) Auto updates are totally nuked

2) Advertising is flushed down the drain

TBH, whoever thought that this is a good idea needs to be lined up at dawn in front of six people with loaded rifles.

[GremlinUK]

Re: Windows 10 in the Military near the frontline?

Where can us mere mortals get this version of Windows 10?

Does it also disable all the call-home functionality under the hood?

[phuzz]

Re: Windows 10 in the Military near the frontline?

Mere-mortal maybe not, but Win10 Enterprise ticks all of those boxes and is available to anyone with deep enough pockets. You might need to have a company to buy it tho.

[David 18]

Re: Windows 10 in the Military near the frontline?

"Does it also disable all the call-home functionality under the hood?"

I guess we'll find out when Redmond is a smoking crater.

[Aussie Doc]

Re: Windows 10 in the Military near the frontline?

Please don't build up my hopes like that.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Windows 10 in the Military near the frontline?

Think about all that battle line telemetry that comes for free... after all, it's all about the "user experience" - "rate the way you died with 1 to 5 stars"....

[ocflyfish]

Re: Windows 10 in the Military near the frontline?

I can just imagine Cortana saying hello just before the missle takes out the OPFOR plane

[Anonymous Coward]

The ARSE contract will go to the lowest bidder

It's all about the bottom line

[Doctor Syntax]

So if they do a poor job at maintaining it will it be half-arsed? Followed by a senior NCO coming into the room shouting "You lot, get off your arses".

[Anonymous Coward]

"You lot, get off your arses"

Shouldn't that be "You lot, get ON your arses"?

[ivan5]

Win 10 and aircraft

Can we assume that the pilots are going to learn a new method when firing the win 10 missiles - a fast loop to get the aircraft behind the missiles before they get up the ARSE of the jet exhaust. It is either that or they need to count the number of fighters shot down by their own missiles.

[David Roberts]

Re: Win 10 and aircraft

Your missile is 20% to the target. 40%. 35%. 35%. 35%.

[Gavin Jamie]

Did they have to tender ARSE?

They are also contracting for Electromagnetic Lethal Battlefield Operation Weaponry although the two systems are frequently mistake for each other.

[Fury556]

And when it needs updates, it will be: "Currently Under Maintenance"

[a_yank_lurker]

Air Farce

Only the Air Farce would be fully ARSEd not half-arsed as they usually are.

[Alan J. Wylie]

Putting the ARSE in arsenal.

[jonathan keith]

Makes perfect sense...

Aren't AMRAAMs supposed to go straight up a target's tailpipe in the first place?

[Anonymous Coward]

In the UK, the MoD would outsource it to Crapita and it would be guaranteed they couldn't find their ARSE with both hands

[Anonymous Coward]

Has this got anything to do with the Electronically Launched Ballistics Ordnance Wing, or am I once again demonstrating that I don't know my ARSE from my ELBOW?

[Starace]

Not the first one

Another aircraft program that shall remain nameless has a Single Harmonised Integrated Test Environment for all development work. The title is displayed in an extra large font with emphasis on the first characters just to make the point clear.

The Brits put in quire a few things like this (plus various scattered insults/digs), not sure the partner nations always get the joke.

[Roger Kynaston]

UK MOD procurement buys

AMRAAM Support System.

Happy Friday.

[Jan K.]

Glad I'm not the only one feeling slightly uneasy by seing the words 'Windows' and 'missiles' in same sentence!

Ah well. What can possible go wrong, when we have 'Quality updates'...

[N2]

Hello...

It looks like some one has fired a missile at you?

Would you like me to:

1. Install updates

2. Re-boot

3. Or select some other random meaningless choice

[Chris G]

Re: Hello...

Or...

You have chosen to launch a missile.

No device drivers were found for this, do you want to automatically download manufacturers drivers for you devices........

Loading, 50 seconds remaining, 2hr 20mins remaining, 3 seconds remaining................KAPOW!!!

[Ken Hagan]

A serious question for US commentards...

Are Americans *that* unaware of the UK meaning of "arse", or could they just/just-not (delete as applicable) care less.

[skeptical i]

Re: A serious question for US commentards...

I would really like to believe that someone had intended to make ARSENAL the full acronym ("amraam remote support equipment, nodes, and logistics" or something) but went out for a coffee break partway through only to return to find the document had been taken as-is up the food chain by a superior officer. That said, it would not surprise me that 'arse' would go right over their heads, as they tend to be oblivious and clueless on other matters (e.g., dumping PFAS into local water supplies, flying deafeningly loud aircraft over residential areas, and so on).

[RNixon]

Re: A serious question for US commentards...

Most Americans wouldn't have a clue what 'arse' means without context. In context, most of us would go 'Huh, must be a British spelling of 'ass'.' but I'd say most people have never run across it.

[Ian Johnston]

The communications department at my dear employers sent round information about a program called "Customer Response And Pedagogy". I replied to point out that the acronym was a little unfortunate and suggested that they rename the survey "Students Heard In Teaching Evaluation". Their response was to raise a formal complaint about me, which I consider one of the high points of what I laughing call my "career".

[Ken Moorhouse]

Are these...

Incontinent Missiles?

[Anonymous Coward]

ARSE liaison officer (Airforce General Jack Hackett) was asked for further comment by the Reg but was told to "Feck Off"

[aqk]

But will this take the Edge off of the F35?

Unless it's built with Chrome and not Titanium.

[dnicholas]

You really don't want your missile rebooting for an update midway to its target

[tempemeaty]

¯\_(; ﾟдﾟ)_/¯

Shouldn't this read, US Air Force Commits Suicide by Windows 10?

[tempemeaty]

...and one more thing...

The mission is only as good as it's weakest link.

[Adrian 4]

sales boys

The Business Unit Managers at $former_employer would have been all over this.