Outlook turned eBay into DD-Bay: Topless busty babe mysteriously fronts souk's emails

eBay UK customers got an unexpected eyeful this week – after a busty topless model bafflingly appeared in some of the online tat souk's emails. When viewing receipts, notifications, and other messages from eBay.co.uk in Microsoft's Outlook mobile app, it seems the sender was a soft-core porno star looking over her shoulder as …

[elkster88]

If the avatar is still in your email client...

"If the avatar is still in your email client, an Outlook account reset (Inbox >> Gear icon >> Email Account >> Reset) will remove it, we're told. "

Umm, just out of curiosity, is there any way to not remove this avatar from my email client?

Asking for a friend, naturally.

[Nick Kew]

Re: If the avatar is still in your email client...

I have a little liquor glass (inherited; I don't know how old it is but I think it's at least two generations above me), looks almost like a small eggcup from a distance.

When full, it displays a very NSFW lady. When you drink up, she disappears.

[Muscleguy]

Re: If the avatar is still in your email client...

Considering her assets are very clearly surgically enhanced and pretty much well beyond the natural range they enter the Uncanny Valley for me. I’m on a Mac so don’t run Outlook but I want her gone despite being a red blooded male.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: If the avatar is still in your email client...

"Considering her assets are very clearly surgically enhanced and pretty much well beyond the natural range they enter the Uncanny Valley for me."

You're wrong.

A bigger picture is found here. Her name is Ewa Sonnet and according to her Boobpedia page she is all natural and looks natural to me too.

All links NSFW, obviously.

Of course, the Reg journos should have dug up all this information themselves.

[werdsmith]

Re: If the avatar is still in your email client...

I’d say overdue at the parlour.

[jake]

Re: If the avatar is still in your email client...

Boobpedia? That's a thing? Really?

I guess we finally have proof that TehIntraWebTubes is stuck in perpetual puberty.

[Intractable Potsherd]

Re: If the avatar is still in your email client...

I'm glad it's not just me that has learned something today! (I'm not referring to the site per se, but the fact that such things exist. Now I'm not sure whether I should get out more or less - avoiding people seems to be a valid option in the light of this revelation!)

[phuzz]

Re: If the avatar is still in your email client...

"the fact that such things exist"

Was it really that much of a surprise?

[hplasm]

Re: If the avatar is still in your email client...

"Boobpedia? That's a thing? Really?"

All human knowledge must be classified,filed, stamped, indexed, and so on.

Such is the way.

- Book of Google, Year of Fnarr.

[Craig 2]

Re: If the avatar is still in your email client...

"Of course, the Reg journos should have dug up all this information themselves."

They asked one of the team to investigate 2 days ago but haven't heard from him since.

[Anonymous Coward]

I'm OUTRAGED

I didn't get to see this! :/

[Sampler]

Re: I'm OUTRAGED

I'm ourtaged the article opens with:

"eBay UK customers got an unexpected eyeful this week"

and not:

"eBay UK customers got more than they bargained for this week"

[Shooter]

We're looking into the matter and will take the necessary actions to support our customer

So Microsoft is going to provide a brassiere?

[hplasm]

Re: We're looking into the matter and will take the necessary actions to support our customer

"So Microsoft is going to provide a brassiere?"

With an undetermined, yet randomly variable amount* of cups.

* See also : N-Titty

[jake]

It's friday, so ...

Some bumbling boob seems to have made a right tit of himself. Do you think MS will let us know when he's busted? It's not like they are ElReg's bosom buddies. My guess is they are udderly ticked off that some got a glands at the pic and will be holding the details close to their chest.

Gut feeling is it was an accident and somebody's feeling accident porn at the moment.

This round's on me, so y'all don't notice me sneaking out ...

[MonkeyCee]

Re: It's friday, so ...

Hey jake, you forgot your coat....

[jake]

Re: It's friday, so ...

Coat? What coat?

I'm in Sonoma, California. I have no idea where my coat even is at the moment, because I haven't needed it since the end of February. I might go looking for it in mid November, if needed. (It's 0025 hours on Sunday morning here, the thermometer on the wall of the barn reports 64F, 17C ... supposed to be 83F/28C this afternoon.)

[sanmigueelbeer]

Hahahahaha ...

Now that's what I call "tits up"!

[John Brown (no body)]

Total Inability To Support Usual Pictures?

[sanmigueelbeer]

Total Inability To Support Usual Pictures?

Total Inability to Screen Unsafe Photos (or Pictures)

[Anonymous Coward]

Fallen Maddonna with the big boobies

Outraged I am, outraged!

[Glen 1]

Re: Fallen Maddonna with the big boobies

Good Moaning!

[m0rt]

"Do let us know, please, if you too spot anything weird and wonderful on the internet."

Erm.......

[Conundrum1885]

Tits up

Because.

Also wasn't there an update for Fortnite that got pulled because the physics was uhm, too realistic?

[jelabarre59]

Re: Tits up

Also wasn't there an update for Fortnite that got pulled because the physics was uhm, too realistic?

So they'd prefer Studio Gainax did them instead? (there's a reason it's called "Gainaxing")

[Kevin McMurtrie]

Hash/UUID collision

I'm betting they're using 128 bit hashes or 122 bit type 4 UUIDs for image IDs. The odds say that they have no chance of colliding but number theory says they must collide. When you might accidentally lose all of your money or broadcast porn, go for what number theory says. (I have once witnessed type 4 UUIDs from different places colliding.)

[mj.jam]

Re: Hash/UUID collision

The birthday problem for this sort of clashes is well studied.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Birthday_attack

If they did use 128 bit hashes, then the probability of a clash is very low even for billions of images.So I guess that either

1. They really do have billions of hashes, and were just (un)lucky here.

2. Somebody has worked out the algorithm used and manufactured a hash collision.

3. They are using far fewer than 128 bits.

4. This wasn't a hash attack.

Given the combination of account it happened with, and the image that ended up being used, I would tend towards this being something that was done deliberately.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Hash/UUID collision

The odds of a UUID4 collision are so low as to be meaningless. If you generate a billion UUIDs a second for 85 years, you would have a 50% chance of one collision.

The only realistic chance of a collision is by misconfiguration of your pRNG.

[GrapeBunch]

The Humanity

Looks like a great way to sell skylights.

Far more commercial impact than the man-with-skylight icon attached >>>

[Tom 35]

Was it someones last day on the job yesterday?

A little gift for the ex-boss on Monday morning?

[Anonymous Coward]

""This was a result of a bug discovered in our service in which the image was erroneously pulled from a disabled Microsoft account (MSA)."

The fact that Microsoft STILL can't even make their own shit work correctly is just mind-boggling.