Queen's speech targets bankers, unemployed, and immigrants

The government put overhauling the financial sector and underpinning the British economy at the top of the agenda in the Queen's speech today. As expected, legislation to support the development of the government's massive comms database was iced - not that this will affect the state's development of the technology. The Queen …

[Joe K]

Blah blah blah

Old woman whines on about whats wrong with England these days. News at 11.

If i wanted to hear that pointless bollocks, i'd talk to some old biddy on the bus.

[Tom Chiverton]

not much else for the bill to do except

"not much else for the bill to do except transpose European data regulations into UK legislation" that'll be the one that allows the government to search your computer remotely then ( http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/7758127.stm) ?

[Stuart Van Onselen]

Banking Regs

It seems to me that after every major recession in the last 100 years, authorities clamp down on whatever risky business the banks and stockbrokers were up to that put them in this mess. And then, a few decades later, these same institutions find a *new* way to be greedy and, ironically, screw themselves (and us!) over.

They're like overgrown, greedy children who need to be protected from themselves!

[Anonymous John]

What about unemployed bankers?

Wonderful Matt cartoon this morning.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/matt/

[bobbles31]

ahhhh, good ole secondary legislation

I wonder if everything that Labour have used secondary legislation to get through had been in their 1997 and 2000 manifestos whether or not they would have come to power?

Statutory instruments are the very antithesis to democracy.

[Wokstation]

Well isn't that lovely?

"Welfare reform is once again on the agenda, with measures promised to help, encourage or force the unemployed back into work, with a particular emphasis on the disabled"

If I could work, I certainly would. I paid National Insurance, and when I became ill, I claimed on that insurance policy. Why should I be punished for that? Sure, they'll say "the genuinely unfit to work needn't worry" but I've already been caught in the crossfire once...

It's also a bit of an odd time to force those out of work into work when the number of jobs available is set to fall.

[David]

"bringing together the customers and border security"

Presumably the customers would be what we used to call 'travellers'?

[smeddy]

I knew it!!!

The Queen reads the Daily Mail!

[Anonymous Coward]

Charles for King

That might be the thing that works. Prince Charles is a gem, and would really stir things up for the best.

He is a progressive thinker, whilst still keeping ties to tradition, he is the man of the moment for the UK, it is time for him to claim his birth right, and get this country back into action.

As the biggest land owners in the UK the monarchy have a duty to set this country on the correct course.

[Marco]

Lie detectors

Lie detectors to catch "benefit cheats"?

How about connecting one to every MP before he makes a statement?

[E_Nigma]

@ Wokstation

"... It's also a bit of an odd time to force those out of work into work when the number of jobs available is set to fall."

Well, assigning everyone fake jobs when there aren't any real ones worked for the communist countries.

[Jonathan]

@David

They probably used the word customers because travellers could have racial/cultural inferences. We can't have the government's border department seemingly targeting Blighty's pikey population'.

[Liam]

ffs

@ It's also a bit of an odd time to force those out of work into work when the number of jobs available is set to fall.

i feel for ya man.

surely in this time of economic problems isnt it time to close the boarders to immigration? if this gets any worse many skilled employees will only be able to get the jobs that the polish etc are getting now. seems stupid to screw ourselves to hep the rest of the world... but isnt that what england has been doing for years now? i for one will be mightily pissed if i lose my job due to the economic climate and find that due to me owning my house i will get less help from anyone than if i had just turned up on these shaws?

well aware that i might get flamed for that but in this time of need and economic breakdown i think we need to start looking after ourselves a little more. after all if the UK goes tits up we wont be able to give billions away any more will we?

[Craig Roberts]

Small point everyone's missing...

... They want to reform the Lap dancing and Beer laws!!!

The lap dancing and the beer!!! That means less strip clubs and more expensive beer!!! For God's sake what is wrong with this government!

Screw the bankers, bollocks to the economy and who cares about the immigrants when I can't finish work (I'm one of the so far (un)lucky few who can't get himself made redundant) and pop into my local strip club next to the primary school and knock back 8 pints of wife beater during happy hour!!!

</flippancy>

I'm serious about the beer though... As a (recently) reformed smoker, may I remind all the non-smoking drinkers that we warned you that once they were done with us that you'd be next...

No more happy hours? No more 2 for 1's?! Trying to curb binge drinking?!

If you wanna curb binge drinking, get the old bill to confiscate the beer off the feral kids that hang around outside the local off licenses and leave the over 18 year olds who work hard all bloody week to be able to afford a pint or six...

... Kill joy bastards!

Mines the one with a concealed bottle of scotch in the inside pocket.

[Anonymous Coward]

@ Other AC (Charles for King)

Yes, the country will be saved by a progressive thinker with no power. Quite right.

[Ferry Boat]

@Charles for King

I'll have a pint of whatever it is that you're drinking.

Hang on, a pint might be a bit too much.

[Anonymous Coward]

its all a crock

I sat watching it on the TV today and what a bunch of stuck up idiots. dressed up like morons walking around dead slow acting like its the 1908 instead of 2008. This all needs to stop we must look so stupid to other countries. it makes us looks like fools.

Then i hear the queen going on about forcing people back into work who are disabled e.t.c. I feel that its totally out of order for the biggest sponging family in the UK to tell people to go to work. The royal family does absolutely NOTHING of any value at all. they spend there time prancing around waving there hands and that's IT. they pay for nothing do nothing. have never worked a single day in there life. Stick the royal family in a council flat in Birmingham and they will soon shut there traps.

I agree some people really are lazy arses and should be forced to work but to bang on like that when there the biggest pikeys in the UK is to much.

[N]

I just wonder if...

Being as she is queen, why cant she fire the toss pots that got us into this mess?

[Anonymous Coward]

@its all a crock

"Then i hear the queen going on about forcing people back into work who are disabled e.t.c. I feel that its totally out of order for the biggest sponging family in the UK to tell people to go to work."

Yeah, I don't see how she can write that crap with a straight face... oh wait. That's right, the gov writes it for her (PM has final approval), she has to say whatever it is whether she agrees with it or not.

[David Hicks]

Dissolution's too good for 'em!

shame she didn't decide to take this opportunity to use her constitutional powers to dissolve the parliament.

I mean, not that it would have happened, but the resulting press and chaos would be a pretty clear message to el Gordo that his government were extremely unpopular.

Tightening up benefits sounds like a good idea. It would be nice if they'd tighten up government spending, too. But you can bet your last quid that there are going to have to be thousands of new posts created to police the current situation.

Government just keeps getting bigger and bigger.

[Graham Marsden]

@N

The Queen can't "fire the toss pots", a little thing called the English Civil War took care of that back in the 17th Century.

Of course at that time it was the Monarch who got so arrogant with his power that the only solution was to chop his head off, so perhaps it's time for a similar solution...

[chris]

@Liam

You are the twat-o-tron and I claim my five poinds.

[Glenn Charles]

poorhouses

I knew you guys still had 'em.

--Glenn

[N]

3 words would have done

Brown, youre fired

& as for civil wars, its long overdue for another

[Winkypop]

Prince Charles

LOL

[Anonymous Coward]

Legislation should be aimed at the employers.

I am very good at IT but slightly old. Due to redundancy I have been an unemployment statistic for over 12 months. I apply for about 5 jobs a week, but even if I get an interview, often by people young enough to be my children, they see me as a threat and will never offer the job.

There is nothing else I can do regardless of what the government say. Worst offenders? try getting a decent job for an over 50 in central or local government where most of them do need to protect their rear ends.

And where the statistics are used to lie: 100s of local jobs, when the majority of the actual vacancies are minimum wage, 16 -25 hours a week over 6 or 7 days and often split within the day. These are not real jobs and they should not be counted as such. My wife was "ordered" to apply for one job which was 6 hours a week.

Tip re sponging of the state:

If your job looks sus, get rid of the savings, especially ISAs. One company crashed and took the pension and the next refused to do any pension so I stuck my pension contributions into ISAs.

First question at the jobcentre: Do you have savings? No only my pension put by in an ISA.

Jobcentre Reply:That is savings so you are not entitled to benefits. Bye!

In the last few years alone I put over £75K into the UK pot. My full "benefit" entitlement was less than £1400 and that reduced to zero after 6 months. The catch 22 is that if you aren't entitled to the basic savings based, strangely described as income based, JSA you are automatically excluded from every other benefit.

So if your future is shaky, now is the time to start planning on "savings" disposal.

[alan]

The Queen

I am a royalist and love the queen, shes ace :)

but to suggest that its her whos banging on about forcing the disabled back to work is a falacy, its ZanuLabor, she gets told what to say and think as much as the rest of us.

If you want to force somebody into council flats so they know what its like, how abou the MP's rather than letting them claim, 10's of thousands of pounds a year for second homes, just give them a couple of floors of a tower block in london for them all to share.

[Anonymous Coward]

@Ferry Boat

Never mind a pint a shot might be too much.

@Anonymous Coward Posted Thursday 4th December 2008 09:51 GMT

Step 1:

Move your savings off shore, or just stick them in a box, then you don't have any.

As for your pension in an ISA, move it to a SIPP - if it's truly a pension - then it won't be counted as savings.

Step 2:

Tell them you spent it, and now have no savings.

[Secretgeek]

'...bankers, unemployed, and immigrants.'

Aren't they one and the same?