Bored bloke takes control of British Army 'psyops' unit's Twitter A crafty joker seized control of the British Army's "influence and outreach" Twitter account – and labelled the military unit "fun sponges" when they tried to get it back. 77 Brigade is the Army's social media influence unit. Rather than posting branded Instagram selfies and the like, they carry out information operations and …
I love how they've now removed all ways of "following" them from the "Follow us" block but left the block itself behind.
And apparently aren't aware of the wayback machine.
https://web.archive.org/web/20190213123424/https://www.army.mod.uk/who-we-are/formations-divisions-brigades/force-troops-command/77-brigade/
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Enter stage right, the late, great Bill Hicks! Everyone, give him a round of applause!
...But I actually asked this guy, ‘OK, dinosaur fossils-- how does that fit into your scheme of life? What's the deal?’
He goes: ‘God put those here to test our faith.’
'I think God put you here to test my faith, dude. I think I've figured this out.’
Does that-- That's what this guy said. Does that bother anyone here? The idea that God might be fucking with our heads? Anyone have trouble sleeping restfully with that thought in their head? God's running around burying fossils: ‘Ho ho! We'll see who believes in me now, ha ha! I'm a prankster God. I am killing me, ho ho ho!’ You know?
You die, you go to St. Peter:
‘Did you believe in dinosaurs?’
‘Well, yeah. There were fossils everywhere. (trapdoor opens) Aaaaarhhh!’
‘You fuckin' idiot! Flying lizards? You're a moron. God was fuckin' with you!’
‘It seemed so plausible, aaaaaahh!’
‘Enjoy the lake of fire, fucker!’
The illuminati are really just those in Italy* who took part in what we call the Enlightenment but in Italian was the Illumionosso, hence Illuminati. Enter the dead oppressive hand of the Medieval thinking Church and of course they went a bit incognito.
From there we have this silly conspiracy theory. According to some as a published research scientist I'm one but I'm not allowed to tell you about meetings or I'd have to kill you, or something like that. We would occasionally have a good laugh about it in the lab. Our robes and cowls seem to be permanently in the wash so all; we have is lab coats and scrubs for the animal house.
But then many lab coat sleeves are far too voluminous and in constant danger of sweeping stuff off the bench. I expect robes and cowls are even less H&S compliant. BTW the H&S jobsworths would insist we wear labcoats even when as qualified, experienced research scientists we knew there was no need (ie we did not need protecting and what we were working on didn't need protecting). There is even a defined step in one procedure where you take your gloves OFF to do the washes. RNAses literally drip from our fingertips and this replaces adding RNAse to reduce background. But try telling that to H&S jobsworths who think buffer is dangerous (it would be fine to drink it, like oral rehydration fluid).
No, it's already under the control of the Bavarian Illuminati.
Based in Bielefeld I'm guessing?
And apparently aren't aware of the wayback machine.
I liked this image from that page. Anyone feel like a quick chorus of He's Got the Whole World In His Hands?
I was posted with them a couple of times as a tank mechanic and took great delight in calling them "tankies"
This prompted them to indignantly scream "No we're cavalry!"
To which I would reply "Well then where are your horses?" Apart from the ones in the polo stables of course...
Worked every time :)
.. for upgraded genetically modified engineered mounts, with at least 3 of the following traits
-Endurance in excess of 6 hours at 30 mph over rough terrain (when ridden with standard issue saddle, rider and kit)
-Endurance in excess of 30 minutes at 50 mph on metaled road surfaces (when ridden with standard issue saddle, rider and kit)
-Ability to see in the dark
-Ability to recognize and obey a controlled vocabulary of at least 20 distinct commands
-Invisible
-Bulletproof
-Carnivorous
-Flight (when ridden with standard issue saddle, rider and kit)
Revisionist history there old chum; the RAF were asked what they wanted, the MoD wrote (and rewrote, and rewrote, and rewrote...) the specification and MessyBeast ordered trebles all round. End result - no airbourne early warning aircraft for the RAF, no work for the wire-pullers and wrench-benders but plenty of G&Ts for the boss and Attaboys for the suited slime in Whitewash... sorry Whitehall.
Biggles would be so proud.
That wasn't really the problem though, was it?
The problem was that somewhere, some daft twunt (or committee of twunts) decided and decreed that the new AWACS should be shoehorned into shagged out old handbuilt/non-standardised airframes based on a non-standardised airliner airframe. Effectively building the damn things from scratch, using a firm that makes printer ink look like value for money.
It was only ever going to end up a massive money sink... to sit in the pantheon of massive money sink cock-ups cooked up by the Triumvirate of Success that is the MoD-Treasury-Defence Contractor. Although even Nimrod 'upgrade' isn't going to trouble to undisputed champion of cockups that was the Chieftain Multi-Fuel engine.
The British... war on a budget, peace on a shoestring.
Brought to you by the same military that pissed 4 Billion up the wall with the nimrod debacle..
To be fair, the Nimrod was in comparison to any of it's competitors (including the P8, which we are going to replace it with) a spectacular aircraft in terms of performance so it was quite reasonable for the RAF to want to keep it with a few improvements, especially if the quote was competitive for doing so. BAE screwed up the project massively, not the RAF.
The problem BAE had was basically modern assumptions and working practices versus the assumptions and working practices of the 1960's.
Modern working practices are that design is done in CAD, and the parts are produced with computer driven equipment to ensure that every two parts are completely, perfectly identical with literally inhuman precision. In the 1960's when the Nimrod was made somebody actually hand made these parts on a Lathe to a paper plan with a human degree of precision.
Back in the 1960's, If a part was a tiny faction of an inch off when it came to fit it then the designers working with a slide rule and a pencil knew that'd happen when they designed it, the fitters knew it'd happen sometimes when they fitted the part, and the fitter reached for a file and filed it down so it'd fit (or it went back on a lathe to trim a thousandths of an inch off) and nobody thought anything of it because it was accepted practice with a small scale production run and fixing little issues like that was part of the job.
In the modern day and age, when the chap tries to slot the parts together and they don't fit everybody involved has a meltdown. The issue gets passed to the line manager, who immediately halts work and passes the issue up to his manager, and so on until it hits the project manager. A cloud of recriminations then drops downwards. Eventually somebody suggests filing a bit off to fit, to somebody sucking air in through their teeth and wondering about the design risk of doing so. A full engineering and risk management review is then conducted, which comes to the conclusion that as long as the two parts meet correctly then it''s as much of an issue as it has been since the aircraft entered service in 1970.
The part is duly filed to fit, and things proceed for another twenty minutes until the next time that 21st century manufacturing practices meet 19th century craftsmanship practices that persisted into the middle of the 20th century.
Rinse and repeat until a handful of the aircraft have been delivered, but the project has overrun for a decade. What somebody ought to have done was come to the conclusion early on that you couldn't interface the new computer built parts with the handmade parts and just built the entire thing from new parts.
This isin't a new issue even in the 20th century, look at the production of the Bofors gun. The Sweedes handbuilt 18 of them for what they wanted, built another 10 for export before then getting orders for a few hundred. These were built with instructions labelled "file this part to fit" before British and the later American mass production started on a larger scale with improved drawings (building a few thousand) and then epic scale when the Americans built an entire industry (~2000 subcontracters) around knocking them out in the tens of thousands with a high degree of precision.
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Norman? That's basically French.
Mais non, mon ami.
Normandy was invaded and settled by Vikings (the NORthMEN) - hence the succession arguments over the English throne between the Norwegians and the Normans. Yes, there was some French blood there, I'm sure, but really the Normans were about as French as the folc of North-folk are basically Welsh (in other words, quite a bit!)
From the fury of the Northmen deliver us, O Lord
Or, to put it another way,
From the driving skills of the Frenchmen deliver us, O Lord
"I only discovered the Viking lineage on Danny Dyer's Ancestry program."
IIRC another program about distribution of ancestry in the UK never explained how/if they distinguished their assignment of Viking or Norman genetic inheritance to people in different parts of the country.
After about 200 years any population has a thoroughly mixed gene pool. The biblical prophecy "of David's line" apparently could have been applied to anyone in that later local population.
My own patriarchal Norman and matriarchal Viking family names were concentrated in certain areas of England until the 20th century. My relatively uncommon UK blood group is "East of the Caucasus".
"Normandy was invaded and settled by Vikings"
Technically, the Normans were gifted Normandy. In 911, in the Treaty of Saint-Clair-sur-Epte between King Charles III of West Francia and Rollo (the Viking leader). It was basically, stop doing all these raids, become Christian and offer military assistance to me and you can have this chunk of land and my daughter.
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"I tried to tell them. Have you ever tried to contact the Army, Navy or RAF? Emails go unanswered and phoning them, whilst easy, is a nightmare of finding the right person, especially when trying to remain anonymous," he told us. "'Bug bounty', you say? Do not have one for this type of attack. Whistle-blowing was an option, but you need to tell them who you are and that has really bad karma. There are numerous examples of grey-hats telling organisations about gaps in the fence but then immediately ending up in the cross hairs."
'Tis nothing unusual, and therefore a much bigger threat/treat/vulnerability for exploiting and expanding, because similar Groundhog Days are experienced by beings elsewhere with some of them being much more problematical ..... for they be both practically invisible and virtually untouchable and vice versa.
:-) Such though provides for relative safety and protective security by virtue of advanced stealth with anonymous assets/SMARTR Clean Skin Agents.
* Defending the indefensible and protecting the desirously wicked and/or sub human.
The 77th Brigade are well warned to be very aware and most wary of Internetworking Universal Virtual Forces and to only engage with them if one really knows what is going on all around everything and how to Command and Control it with Sp00ky IT and Special IntelAIgent Services ....... for is that not wherefor that is where IT and AI are at nowadays ? .
wary of Internetworking UniversalVirtualVulture Forces .... Locky
Those too, Locky. With AIMODified DODGI Troupers r Us of the InterNetional Brigade Wheeling and Dealing with and for Brigands in and on Winning Rolls in Novel Roles.
A Veritable and Venerable Status Quo Nightmare for Failed Elements to Try to Contain and Extinguish Unsuccessfully.
A brigade does not "usually" consist of 650+/- soldiers, that is an Infantry Battalion, or support-arms Regiment.
A Brigade is a composite formation, either Infantry or Armour in focus, complete with support arms such as RE, Sigs, REME, etc, and number between 3,500 - 5000. We don't have many of these, as ever since the early 90's the MoD has cut and chopped them beyond recognition.
"The levels of sophistication involved in this attack indicate the involvement of a foreign State Actor. Russian and Chinese governments in particular are known to have a knowledge of the existence of Twitter. While the attack was promptly foiled by our elite cyber units, it is important to note that most major industries in the UK use Twitter. In order to prevent a massive disruption of the British economy by foreign hostile actors, it is crucial to keep us very well funded."
I didn't get where I am today without being stuck in traffic jams outside their front gate (in a secret location near the Travelodge Newbury Chieveley M4) when the M4 or A34 is gridlocked.
https://www.army.mod.uk/who-we-are/formations-divisions-brigades/force-troops-command/77-brigade/apply-to-join-us/
If you would like to apply to join us please get in touch by email. For general media enquiries should be directed to the MOD’s 24-hour Press Office number 0207 218 7907. Please get in touch and we can discuss your options further.
EMAIL: 77x-Recruiting-GpMailbox@mod.gov.uk
ADDRESS: Denison Barracks, Hermitage, RG18 9TP
I must remember to go along to the next Hermitage Parish Council meeting and ask them to update the village website.
http://hermitagevillage.apps-1and1.net/about-hermitage/organisations
All bought to you courtesy of that oxymoron known as Military Intelligence.
Please read the whole story... By that logic, The Register travelled to the future when we wrote about that same Twitter account (which we linked to at the time) used by the same unit, back in January 2017. https://www.theregister.co.uk/2017/01/03/77_brigade_struggling_recruit_40_pc_below_establishment/ (Hint: we didn't.)
'As the unit's official page puts it in impenetrable military management-speak, its job is to "challenge the difficulties of modern warfare using non-lethal engagement and legitimate non-military levers as a means to adapt behaviours of the opposing forces and adversaries"'.
In plain English, then, their job is to lie persuasively. In other words, they are salesmen or politicians, no soldiers.
Those creating military misinformation know what is true and what is deceit - although the eventual propagators should not know that difference. ... AC
So, it is acceptable to have the certifiably mad and expensively belligerent lead the blissfully ignorant and fatally naive?
No wonder such idiotic systems are being decimated and destroyed by smarter intelligence flows and sensitive information leaking. The crazies were thinking they were able to run the asylum rather than realising they were razing it to the ground with themselves locked securely inside burning buildings.
The crazies were thinking they were able to run the asylum rather than realising they were razing it to the ground with themselves locked securely inside burning buildings
The Neoconopticon at full steam seemingly. After arriving at North to South, considering East to West, the scale of desperation to fit future media presentations to seemingly Stranger Things never ceases to amaze in both the magnitude and scale of an almighty fangled futures trading operative operation, with Monsters Inc delivering demonic driver deliverables with sinister signals and conflicting memorandum.
But one must say, that dont blame the actor if the script went adrift in the mail when the movie ends up the next Waterworld with Watergate connotations.
Never ceases to amaze though ;-)
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