What employs half a million people, just did $44bn in sales, and rhymes with Azerbaijan? Defying subdued predictions, Amazon on Thursday reported healthy third-quarter earnings of $0.52 per diluted share, based on net income of $256m, on par with $0.52 per diluted share and $252m a year ago. The tech giant's sales revenue reached $43.7bn, up 34 per cent from $32.71bn in Q3 2016, which ended September 30. That …
El Reg has always had a thing for the odd fun headline, but recently they've become almost universal, incomprehensible, and unfunny due to overuse. It seems unfair of some commentators to describe them as clickbait though, since they're so unintelligible they're not even tempting to click on.
Let's not forget the "supercilious, formalistic silly words surround us" form that pops up at every mention of the West Coast.
I prefered the sarky headlines - but someone seems to have taken to heart the old saying "sarcasm is the lowest form of wit." Whether the saying is true or not, I's like to see more of the sarky taglines!
The answer to the riddle of the headline is: Nothing. Nothing does that. In particular "Amazon" doesn't.
I hear that ale from CAMRA's fun,
And makers of flim-flam are stunned,
Before you put pajamas on
Just put down that hammer, son
I am the one to slam 'er on
And plenty rhymes with Amazon.
In spite of this I have my calm,
Like Alladin why harm
Someone whose rather alarmed
Not one of them is Azerbaijan.
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