back to article Idris Elba thrashes Night Manager Hiddleston for James Bond job vacancy

Pity Tom Hiddleston. Not only finished with, er, publicity-shy popstress Taylor Swift but ruled out of contention for the next James Bond film. According to you, the former Night Manager’s tight buns won’t be shaking and stirring their way through the next 007 flick. A Reg poll on who should follow Daniel Craig as the next …

  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Hiddleston and Swift Break-Up

    For those wishing to know what's really going on with Taylor Swift's love life, Google "kaylor".

    1. Dan Wilkie

      Re: Hiddleston and Swift Break-Up

      Huh, didn't see that one coming.

    2. Dave 126 Silver badge

      Re: Hiddleston and Swift Break-Up

      >For those wishing to know what's really going on with Taylor Swift's love life,

      ... websites more suitable than TheRegister exist. :)

    3. Eddy Ito

      For those wishing to know...

      Why would anyone care? Well, anyone other than Kanye. Oh wait... Nope, still don't care. Maybe you should ask Kim.

  2. Dan 55 Silver badge
    Meh

    My name's Elba, Idris Elba (moody look)

    Even in Zootopia you could tell which character was Idris Elba as soon as the first sentence came out of his mouth.

    I'm sure it'd be fine if you've got to see a film where you expect to see Idris Elba starring as himself, but I'm not so sure about James Bond.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: My name's Elba, Idris Elba (moody look)

      > Even in Zootopia you could tell which character was Idris Elba as soon as the first sentence came out of his mouth.

      I had only really seen him in the "angry but basically decent man haunted by troubled past" roles until I watched the Jungle Book remake. He goes full-on villain and he's fucking terrifying.

      I think he's got a better acting range than he gets credit for.

  3. FuzzyWuzzys
    Thumb Up

    My wife thinks Craig looks like a rapist!!

    Can't stand Craig in any role I've seen him in, never a watched a Bond of his. My wife said she can't stand Craig either as he has very creepy eyes that just make you feel sick, like he's either going to rape you or beat you up! Ha ha!

    If Elba takes the role I'd be more than happy to head back to watching my first Bond in many years if Elba is given a crack at it!

    1. Necronomnomnomicon

      Re: My wife thinks Craig looks like a rapist!!

      Craig's ideal for Bond, who is definitely quite rapey. There's a compilation on Youtube of Bond's rapiest moments, and there are quite a few of those moments.

  4. Blotto Silver badge

    Been saying for ages that idris should be bond, he'd be a super cool badass bond, just as bond should be.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      He'd make a better baddie than he would a Bond.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    No.

    Sorry Idris, but just no.

    The only reason he would get the role would be as a token gesture.*

    Just like Lenny Henrys knighthood.*

    And Hiddleston is just too "wet" about the ears.

    *to put a tick in some "diversity" checklist.

    Sorry, not sorry.

    1. Dave 126 Silver badge

      Re: No.

      >The only reason he would get the role would be as a token gesture... ...to put a tick in some "diversity" checklist.

      There are other check boxes, 007 traits, that Elba has ticks in:

      - Very attractive to women

      - Physically imposing

      - Has driven a Bentley very fast

      - British

      So whilst I'm not saying that tokenism is completely absent, to say that it is the only factor is going a bit far.

      Supporting links:

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNQl2Ii0H-I (Pacfic Rim- Elba's character dressing down a subordinate)

      http://www.bentleymotors.com/en/world-of-bentley/our-story/news/2015/idris-elba-breaks-historic-flying-mile-speed-record-.html

      http://www.heart.co.uk/photos/celebrity-photos/top-25-sexiest-men/idris-elba-covers-maxim-magazine/

  6. Connor

    What the?

    Why no Warwick Davies? What kind of example does that set for those with Dwarfism or other disabilities?

    1. Dave 126 Silver badge

      Re: What the?

      Well, Odd Job was the toughest playable character in GoldenEye multiplayer on the N64 (because he presented a smaller target).

      Peter Dinklage has done plenty of womanising and drinking in Game of Thrones.

      1. muddysteve

        Re: What the?

        Odd Job was the big Korean guy who threw hats in Goldfinger. I think you mean Scaramanger's sidekick in "The Man with the Golden Gun". Can't remember his name - can't be bothered to search for it.

        1. mikeHingley

          Re: What the?

          nick nack?

        2. Dave 126 Silver badge

          Re: What the?

          @muddysteve

          You are quite right! There is indeed confusion, but it appears to be on the part of the game's developers:

          -He is the shortest character in the game, despite Oddjob as he appeared in the original film being about average height. It seems likely that he was confused with the actually diminutive Nick Nack from The Man with the Golden Gun.

          -Due to his short height, he cannot be hit by the normal auto-aim gunfire (which simply shoots above his -head). Instead the other player must stop moving to use the precise aim crosshairs to aim downward and deliberately at him. Because of this, Oddjob gives his user an unfair advantage and his use is often looked down upon.

          - http://goldeneye.wikia.com/wiki/Oddjob

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: What the?

      Why not Vladimir Putin (yes, that one)?. Leave aside for a moment the fact that he's the big bad wolf of the moment, he'd be perfect: white, charismatic, womanizer, alcohol resistant (he's Russian), martial arts & combat training. What more do you want?

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Favourite role

    My favourite Idris Elba role was when he was telling me to buy satellite TV subscriptions.

    No. I will not subsidise some premiership footballers' wages.

    I would've liked to have seen Colin Salmon, Charles Robinson in the Brosnan era, "promoted" to Bond.

  8. MJI Silver badge

    Good but not Bond

    Firstly nothing at all to do with being black. Nor to do with continuity.

    He would make a great secret agent, but his characters come across more cerebral than Bond.

    Yes I know he is an actor, but he doesn't seem Bond to me.

    I did like Brosnan and also Connery.

    Now make some films with IE as another special agent and we will all watch. Perhaps he could get Bond out of a pickle?

    1. Blotto Silver badge

      Re: Good but not Bond

      "He would make a great secret agent, but his characters come across more cerebral than Bond"

      surely thats the kind of Bond we want.

      British secret agent, making split second life or death decisions based on fact, not intuition.

      1. MJI Silver badge

        Re: Good but not Bond

        No being a new character means new stories not constrained by the Bond character baggage.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Good but not Bond

      I feel that it's time Bond was harmonised with the now, like the remakes of most older films (barring the turkey's from of late)

      Idris would be a good model for all, as would Emma Watson (think Uma in Kill Bill)

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    for all the 'PC' fucks out there, i'll do you a deal.....

    ...you can ave Mr Elbow as Bond so long as Sid Little can play Shaft in the next reboot....only fair.

    1. inmypjs Silver badge

      Re: for all the 'PC' fucks out there, i'll do you a deal.....

      Upvote from me. Just for winding up the people that were bothered enough to downvote :)

      1. Yugguy

        Re: for all the 'PC' fucks out there, i'll do you a deal.....

        And me.

  10. Dave 126 Silver badge

    Credit to...

    'quattroprorocked'

    According to the Reg Forums search tool, quattroprorocked was the first of us here to support Idris Elba as Bond, though fellow commentards had previously suggested him for Dr Who.

    (You have to search for just 'Idris' - if you use his full name then you'll be given the wrong idea that I was the first commentard to support Mr Elba as 007)

  11. John Smith 19 Gold badge
    Unhappy

    Let's keep in mind you need someone who does bad things OHMSS

    And Tom Hardy looks like a guy who could do very bad things in a good cause.*

    Good point about Craig and some of the rapey moments. I wonder how many people realize that he is in fact a Scouser?

    *Although perhaps without those monologues of his (Peaky Blinders, Lawless) that leave people wondering "Err, yes. WTF did he just say?"

    1. Yugguy

      Re: Let's keep in mind you need someone who does bad things OHMSS

      In that case you need to cast Vin Diesel.

      So he can repeat that immortal line from XXX:

      "The things I'm gonna do for my country."

    2. Mark 65

      Re: Let's keep in mind you need someone who does bad things OHMSS

      Tom Hardy sometimes seems more like he'd play a Bond that kept previous opponents in the cellar for casual dismemberment for personal amusement in his downtime. Just a bit too psycho I think. Good, but not sure he's Bond. Again, like Idris, I think he'd make a better bad guy.

      1. John Smith 19 Gold badge

        "Tom Hardy.. " " kept previous opponents in the cellar for casual dismemberment"

        Well sometimes having casual affairs with married women just doesn't quite cut it, so to speak. :)

        Note that apart from his signature characters he has shown his softer side in "This Means War" and "A for Andromeda."

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Was the poll inaugurated on April 1st, or is it that all the voters have a sense of humour?

  13. gypsythief

    T'was I...

    ...that first nominated Dabbsy in the original article. I was confidant he could win the poll. But then Idris was nominated and doubt crept into my mind. I incapable of continuing to support my champion.

    Able was I, ere I saw Elba.

    1. Dave 126 Silver badge

      Re: T'was I...

      Unable was I, to compose a palindrome containing SBBAD...

    2. Alexander J. Martin

      Re: T'was I... [Palindrome thread]

      Rise to vote sir.

  14. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge
    Pint

    Product placement

    Idris Ginger Beer

    1. tfewster

      Re: Product placement

      No, no, not the ginger beer trick! Even Bond couldn't stand up to that. Even Idris Elba as Bond couldn't be expected to resist that.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Oh alright then

    I throw my hat into the ring.

  16. Tom 7

    Video anywhere

    Of Elba thrashing Hiddleston? This is the only time the missus has responded to a Reg headline.

  17. get off

    Islington Elites.....

    Not more posh English school boys. Connery perhaps not but run with me on this one..

    I've always fancied Jason Statham or even Vinnie Jones for the Bond role. Go on, just picture it!!

    Was interested to see the other day. Prisoner article, Patrick McGoohan turned the part of Bond down because he didn't 'agree with all the violence'.. Found that bizarre somehow...

    Anyway. Statham/Jones seeing the red mist and just going mental, badass.. No?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Islington Elites.....

      Statham can't act his way out of a paper bag and he's ginger - Hiddleston can act, he's just not threatening.

      Idris would be good.

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