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back to article English Channel defeats one-armed Frenchman

A one-armed Frenchman came tantalisingly close to swimming the English Channel on Monday, but was defeated when strong currents "dragged him off his planned route" within sight of the French coast, Reuters reports. Retired carpenter Olivier Desmet, 56, lost his left forearm in a motorbike accident back in 1976. He said he'd …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Sink the Bismarck

    I have a vision of him going around in a big circle, what with having one arm - but it could be that he has a centrally-mounted arm, perhaps e.g. coming out of his back, like a shark's fin (the article doesn't say).

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  2. Anonymous Coward
    Dead Vulture

    And the IT angle....

    ....is?

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  3. Mike Somers
    Paris Hilton

    Frenchman ....Swimming?

    Surely said Frenchman must have been using the backstroke going to wrong way. Were the chips covered in garlic and cheese like most other food in France, also beer - they only know how to drink wine I thought

    Paris because she likes going the wrong way with a back-stroke

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  4. Matthew
    Thumb Up

    Channel

    Once again the channel saves us from this wannabe Canutes!

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  5. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    It's not Olden.. It's Golden

    What do you call an man with no legs and no arms swimming the Channel....

    Clever DIck!!

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  6. XML slave
    Linux

    My heart goes out...

    I'd love to make a comment about silly french accents and all, but I'm a little too impressed by the thought of a one armed man coming that close to crossing. I have two arms and can't swim more than 1/2 a kilo. Someone buy that man an ale.

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  7. Anonymous Coward
    Alert

    In sight of the french coast..

    So did he get off the beach then?

    typical French Success then...

    (ah the good old google Im feeling lucky trick)

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  8. John
    Coat

    Round and round...

    With only one arm, doesn't he swim in circles?

    Yes yes, I'll get my coat...

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  9. Andy Kay

    Succes?

    "For me it's a great success and not a failure."

    I successfully didnt swim the channel too - can I have my medal?

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  10. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Title

    Would the French immigration authorities allow him back in? Presumably he is not much of a threat. He seems mostly armless anyway.

    Already on my way out.

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  11. TeeCee Gold badge
    Coat

    His entry in HHGTTG?

    "Mostly armless."

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  12. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    In other news...

    One-eyed milkman arrested for filming himself driving at 150kph on a drugs run...

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  13. Michael O'Malley
    Joke

    Some armless fun

    At least he brought along a friend to give him a hand.

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  14. Andrew
    IT Angle

    Beer and chips...

    ...just as well all that beer didn't leave him legless

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  15. Simon
    Stop

    Surely...

    He would just swim around in circles anyway?

    Sorry.

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  16. Ron
    Coat

    Going in circles?

    No wonder he had trouble, he was just going in circles!

    I kid, I kid...

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  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Mike Somers

    Yup, he was standing on the beach, and we told him the Germans were coming... Next thing we knew he was in the water and swimming round in circles!

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  18. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Round of applause

    I think he should give himself a big round of applause.

    Oh !

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  19. Damn Yank

    Now that...

    ..... is a cheeky little f**ker.

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  20. Anonymous John
    Joke

    strong currents "dragged him off his planned route"

    My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in.

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  21. mutt1170
    Coat

    The IT Angle is...

    calculating the circumference of the circles he swam in!.

    Mine's the one with the pinned up sleeve.

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  22. Glenn Amspaugh
    Thumb Up

    "And the IT angle is..."

    Chips and beer?

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  23. Treacle

    Bootnote^2

    Bootnote to a bootnote... nice one.

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  24. Gary

    Yeah, Right!

    This guy has more balls than all the tosssers who knock him here Gary

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  25. Daniel Wilkie
    Heart

    @Gary

    Less arms though...

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  26. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Beat the Reaper

    "And the IT angle is?"

    It's a story about a one-armed Frenchman who has narrowly failed to swim the English channel. I can't think of a more IT-relevant story. What more IT angle do you need?

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  27. Big_Boomer Silver badge

    Surely he swam the Sleeve?

    Since he is French, he will have swum "La Manche", or more precisely not swum "La Manche". That man has "les grandes couilles!"

    Can any of you pisstakers swim for 14½ hours in cold water with one arm tied behind your back? Nah, didn't think so. Yer a bunch of overweight mouse pushers. And yes, I'm an overweight mouse pusher too! :)

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  28. M Neligan

    wannabe Canutes

    This page doesn't seem to lack "wannabe Canutes", if you drop a couple of letters. (And he was actually also called Cnut and even Knut.)

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  29. Andy Turner

    Sheesh, give it a rest

    Geeks wouldn't know a joke if it slapped them in the face. I've never read such a stream of utter drivel. There's a reason you're not all comedians you know.

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  30. Gavin

    How close did he get?

    Just how close was he to making it across? Was he an arms length away from success?

    *i'll get my coat*

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