back to article Google snaps Dutch woman completely taking the piss

Google has moved with its usual lightning speed to erase an entertaining street scene captured by one of by its Street View prowlcams in the in the Dutch town of Almere. Our censored version of the Street View woman No sooner had the apparently worse for wear micturator been splashed across Live Leak than expert blurring …

  1. Your alien overlord - fear me

    Well, the Google car drver should have stopped and pointed out she was still pissing herself (bottom of the trousers). Also, is it normal for a female to urinate in droplets (not into goldern showers so I've no idea)?

    1. This post has been deleted by its author

      1. John Tserkezis

        "Depends on the individual."

        Yes. Some individuals don't piss on the streets.

    2. hazzamon

      Take a high shutter speed photo of your own wee and you'll see that it's droplets too.

      I remember Mythbusters covered the 'Peeing on the electrified railway' myth once, and busted it on account of the fact that unless you literally piss like a horse, the stream will break up into air-insulated droplets well before it hits anything electrified.

      1. JimmyPage Silver badge
        Boffin

        I believe the phrase you are looking for is

        "laminar flow" ?

        One of the reasons aerators are fitted to modern taps - to prevent the stream of water acting like a solid (and bouncing back into your face).

      2. SuccessCase

        "I remember Mythbusters covered the 'Peeing on the electrified railway' myth once, and busted it on account of the fact that unless you literally piss like a horse, the stream will break up into air-insulated droplets well before it hits anything electrified."

        I believe it, but excuse me if I avoid ever attempting to prove the truth of the assertion.

      3. GrumpenKraut

        > ... 'Peeing on the electrified railway' myth ...

        Please do not try. The voltage can easily skip the gaps. Electric arc to the noodle injuries are seriously unfunny.

        1. x 7

          not a rail, but a story about an idiot peeing on a transformer

          http://www.leicestermercury.co.uk/Explosion-Leicester-sub-station-turned-thief/story-15280778-detail/story.html

          I once actually saw three drunk idiots trying to compete to see who could pee through a safety fence and reach a transformer. I got out of the area sharpish. Luckily no bangs that day, the fence was presumably a safe enough distance

        2. John Tserkezis

          "Electric arc to the noodle injuries are seriously unfunny."

          As long as it's not yourself, I beg to differ.

    3. Toltec

      @ Your alien overlord - fear me

      Upvote for the python reference.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      @ Your alien overlord - fear me

      "Also, is it normal for a female to urinate in droplets (not into goldern showers so I've no idea)?"

      You're looking for an excuse to start you own investigation into this, aren't you?

  2. Proud Father
    Paris Hilton

    Stay classy...

    ...lady.

    1. Little Mouse

      Re: Stay classy...

      Don't judge anyone until you've walked a mile in their shoes.

      Their piss-soaked open-toe shoes.

  3. BongoJoe

    Reminds me some of Brugel's paintings.

    1. Charlie Clark Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Indeed. Having a piss is the least of the indulgences: vomiting, fondling and fornicating can often be found in pictures from the Golden Age.

      Georgian and Regency sensibilities were indeed a great deal more licentious than the Victorian prudishness which came to dominate. There's economic argument in there somewhere.

  4. ici.chacal

    What's with the censored puddle, did she drop a #2 also..?

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Should have used a shewee. Fight the patriarchy!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      It's the patriarchy that forced her to urinate in public. They're behind everything. They're a bit like a cross between reptiloids and the illuminati.

      1. JulieM Silver badge
        Megaphone

        Many a true word spoken in jest

        No doubt you think you are sending up some feminists, but you might not actually be so far off the truth with your flippant comment.

        The human male reproductive system, forced by circumstance to share a conduit with the excretory system, has evolved over the years to incorporate something akin to the diverter valve in a central heating system (including the amount of grief caused when it misbehaves), all for the purpose of ensuring that a man will not piss himself whilst "on the job".

        Facility provision originally based on the requirements of a man with good bladder endurance (and even then, somewhat optimistically; since no man will dare admit needing to go more frequently, lest his masculinity be questioned) will thus be found wanting by anybody else. And with the pressure on local authorities to save even more money; and despite the fact that while we can send something the size of a fridge three times as far through the unforgiving environment of Space as the distance from the Earth the Sun and land it in an area the size of Derby* and it still mostly work when it gets there, we can't build a vandal-proof toilet, getting caught short is becoming the new reality for many people.

        More cameras and fewer bathrooms are just going to lead to more people getting photographed doing the inevitable. And all we can do is point and laugh and try and conceal the primal, visceral fear that it could be us next.

        * A city whose bus station features pay toilets, recently "upgraded" to 30 pence a go; the space behind the back of which bears the twin odours of cigarettes and stale urine, and anyone having to negotiate it is advised to inhale deeply before entering, hold their breath as long as possible then exhale slowly while passing through.

        1. x 7

          Re: Many a true word spoken in jest

          "Derby"

          A city so boring that watching people pee in the street is the only entertainment, other than watching the traffic lights change

  6. ratfox
    Coat

    "A Village Fair with a Church Behind"

    What's so ecclesiastic about this uncovered behind?

    1. Nameless Dread

      Re: "A Village Fair with a Church Behind"

      The original, painted from a different viewpoint, was titled: "A Village Church with a Fair Behind".

    2. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: "A Village Fair with a Church Behind"

      Turning the other cheek?

  7. Martin Summers Silver badge

    Live leak, how apt.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Live leak, how apt.

      LOL. That is so bad, it's funny. Hahaha..

      1. Martin Summers Silver badge

        Thanks I feel validated.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          hahaha. Way to burn liveleak too. This may be the first actual leak (whistleblowing OR urinating) on that site. Shocking!

  8. Turtle

    Taste.

    "It's a fun example of the way in which the tastes from different periods* respond differently to the same thing. George IV loved that kind of thing."

    It might taste good to you and George, but, ugh...

    * I'm ignoring this word here. Be grateful.

  9. Fibbles

    Poor restoration

    Assuming it's not an artefact of the photography, then the restorers have absolutely destroyed the contrast in that painting. The highlights are so dull and muddied now.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Poor restoration

      I had no idea they had blimps in 1643.

      1. John Tserkezis

        Re: Poor restoration

        "I had no idea they had blimps in 1643."

        I'm assuming the painting restorers are taking the piss?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Poor restoration

      A piss-poor restoration, really.

    3. Simon Harris

      Re: Poor restoration

      At least they've corrected the white balance.

  10. chivo243 Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Miss Wrong

    Tramp stamp and fag in hand... Say it with me: Classsaay!

    1. x 7

      Re: Miss Wrong

      thats not a fag, thats a joint. Look at the size.

      Junkie working girl at a guess, making room for her next encounter

      1. JulieM Silver badge

        Re: Miss Wrong

        ..... And had it been a man caught short in a similar situation, would you have been so ready to dismiss him as some sort of "undesirable" ?

        Even "nice girls" have to go to the bathroom sometimes, whether or not there is an actual bathroom.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Note the tramp stamp at the requisite location

    Oh so predictable!

  12. JimmyPage Silver badge

    Is that the van Buren supernova I see ...

  13. jason 7

    Happens all the while in Norwich.

    I hear in some civilised places they have public toilets and sanitation.

    1. chivo243 Silver badge

      Re: Happens all the while in Norwich.

      "public toilets and sanitation."

      How about both!

      https://kwahlgren.files.wordpress.com/2009/11/europe-summer-09-182.jpg

      Outdoor toilets and canals in the same photo!

    2. PhilBuk

      Re: Happens all the while in Norwich.

      I can assure you that that statement does not apply to Stockholm. Was quite suprised by the number of people pissing on the streets due to the lack of public toilets.

      Phil.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Angry of Mayfair

    I am shocked. Naughty bits covered but not the Cigarette?

    1. Breen Whitman

      Re: Angry of Mayfair

      The Register is part owned by a company with ownership links to a tobacco company.

      Another is a bacon company.

      Yes, the pieces are coming together.

      1. x 7

        Re: Angry of Mayfair

        they're not showing any bacon flaps though

  15. Stevie

    Bah!

    Dear lord, look at the size of the shadow cast by the Google Street View Surveillance Drone!

  16. x 7

    sans blur @ http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=016_1446403475

    skanky - no wonder they blurred her face

    more micturating mayhem at http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=aed_1434258186

    and http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=e70_1402339841

    you'll never ride on a bus again......

  17. F111F
    Headmaster

    probably probably = possibly?

    See title

    /end grammar rant

  18. harmjschoonhoven
    1. Fink-Nottle

      Re: Required reading

      Here's a salutary lesson on how not to do it.

  19. JimC

    Grief , what a nightmare, caught out, desperate for a pee, finally find a quiet corner and some damn google car drives past...

    As you sanctimonious SOBs will find out, as you get older you're most likely to have less and less time to try and find somewhere to pee, so watch out...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Happy

      So very true, thats why shopping on the interweb is so popular among the grey surfers

  20. RoboticRabbit

    Judging from the colour of the ground there its a popular spot for relief.

  21. Danny 2

    Show the face at least

    I believe this is my ex-fiancee. She did silly things like try to iron her blouse while wearing it. She also wouldn't be ashamed of me identifying her if it was her, no Dutch person is ashamed of peeing in public. That's the real reason they have canals.

    1. x 7

      Re: Show the face at least

      Danny

      I've already posted the link to the untouched photos, but just for you here it is again

      http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=016_1446403475

      If thats your girl, you need to think where your life is heading. She's got a joint in her hand, a marijuana leaf tattoo on her right wrist, looks like she needs a bath.......and wet jeans

  22. Captain Badmouth
    Facepalm

    Bordeaux cathedral? green walls

    I was there quite a few years ago for a Wales B v France B rugby match at Arcachon (tres jolie). In one internal corner of the cathedral the walls were green due to it being the corner where the prostitutes relieved themselves, according to our hotelier. I think it was the cathedral anyway. :)

    Cover your eyes.

  23. Wisteela

    "splashed across Live Leak"

    How very apt

    1. JulieM Silver badge

      Re: "splashed across Live Leak"

      In all my years of reading The Register, Lester Haines has only missed one opportunity to slip in a "single and proud of it"-entendre. And long may that record stand.

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