back to article Gold bugs, concrete bog roll holders and frolic-friendly furniture: What IS it with designers?

The 100% Design Show is all about innovation. This year there's a strong emphasis on things pretending to be other things, and furniture made out of stuff you wouldn't normally expect it to be made out of. Some of it's even quite comfortable... App One Design App One don't make apps, which is confusing in itself, but rather …

  1. Alan J. Wylie

    Floor loading

    As for the Italian marble Lego furniture, as this recent post points out, you really need to consider floor loading.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Floor loading

      And the fact it looks like you can't sit at the table

    2. PhilBuk

      Re: Floor loading

      Also, picture says granite. Granite != Marble. Marble == Limestone (cooked). Granite == complicated crunchy stuff.

      Phil.

  2. Yesnomaybe

    Lina Moon, not really original is it?

    http://www.jeffbots.com/darkstar4.jpg

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      stop smirking, that movie was nothing but a fleeting inspiration which blossomed into a fully-fledged design!

  3. Your alien overlord - fear me

    Lina Moon looks like a traditional love seat with a 'guest' - menage a trois anyone?

  4. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

    "a use for this doubtless ingenious piece of design"

    It's a money transfer device. It transfers money to the maker from those who have more of it than sense.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Have to admit...

    ...I like the wooden bath. Plus it should keep your water warmer longer.

    The graph pad is clever, but much of the other stuff is just daft.

    BTW fake foliage? leave it in the sun for a couple of years and watch it turn blue.

    1. Peter Simpson 1
      FAIL

      Re: Have to admit...

      I predict the varnish on the wooden tub will start peeling within two years, and the tub will develop a crack (and therefore, a leak) within five.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Have to admit...

        Your probably right, something tells me they may of never heard of marine varnish.

        1. John 110
          FAIL

          Re: Have to admit...

          @Lost

          "...the wooden bath, this one crafted from yacht-varnished oak,..."

          pay attention...

          1. phuzz Silver badge

            Re: Have to admit...

            I assume that they mean that it's varnished oak as used in yachts, but it reads as if they've varnished the oak with yachts...

            1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

              Re: Have to admit...

              "it reads as if they've varnished the oak with yachts..."

              You've never heard of yacht varnish? It's a thing.

              <tangent> I bought a tin of it years ago to use on the parquet floor but didn't get round to doing the job for a long time. Eventually I came to use it, levered off the spring clips holding the lid down & the lid blew off with quite a bang.</tangent>

      2. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

        Re: Have to admit...

        "I predict the varnish on the wooden tub will start peeling within two years"

        It probably won't matter. By then it'll be out of fashion, the bathroom will have been made over & someone will have hauled the bath out of a skip & be mixing plaster in it.

    2. VinceH

      Re: Have to admit...

      "The graph pad is clever"

      Yeah, but quite a bit more expensive than a ruler and protractor etc. These tools also allow you to draw straight and angled lines. Add a compass, and you can even manage curves.

    3. Khaptain Silver badge

      Re: Baths and Bugs

      If that giant ant floated I would take it along with that fantastic looking bath.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    they've so far sold four of these intriguing units

    I'm surprised.

    1. Simon Coyne

      Re: they've so far sold four of these intriguing units

      I'm amazed. I mean I know we go through phases but I don't recall anyone going through a lumberyard phase other than Wickes.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    the internet is one of those passing fads

    I always admire the bold individuals who laugh (or spit) in the face of reality, particularly sitting on a path of delayed 7.43 to Paddington. That said, the train _will_ pass, and the peace shall reign once more...

  8. The Axe

    I saw you coming

    All this stuff reminds me of the Harry & Paul show.

  9. Smallbrainfield

    That graph pad stuff has been around for years.

    A couple of us had little sample versions we picked up from a materials trade show when I was at college, (over 25 years ago, bloody hell). It's a great idea. Pretty sure mine got nicked when we switched studios.

  10. Naughtyhorse

    Isn't it about time we were allowed to shoot anyone that called themselves 'a designer' but who lacked the wit to perform basic structural calculations, or work to a coherent design brief?

    Read a FB post from a friend about some twat who'd invented a thin (widthways) plug (interesting idea, only suitable for low power applications and way too mechanically complex to be of much use for long) in response to the question 'why is this plug 10mm thick? the response was 'well the macbook air is 10mm thick and thats the definition of thin...

    at that point i stopped surfing the net and went looking for a fucking gun.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Here's that gun you are looking for:

      Fucking Gun

  11. Kubla Cant

    Steam flames

    these babies can be plumbed into your regular water supply to save having to top them up

    Unfortunately I'm so far behind the curve that none of my fireplaces has a water supply. I suppose I could have a fake wood fire in the bath, but that would mean taking the coal out.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Steam flames

      IIRC the water has to be relatively pure - so possibly not mains water unless it is treated first.

    2. Fibbles

      Re: Steam flames

      The bathroom is probably the only suitable place for it. I can't imagine that most people would want something releasing that much moisture in their living room.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Steam flames

        The local showroom have their display model switched on during opening hours. They reckon the approximately 1 litre water reservoir needs filling about once a week - say 8 hours a day for 6 days = 20ml/hour.

        In contrast it appears that a person possibly loses up to 800ml of water a day by exhaling and perspiration - about 30ml/hour

        This suggests that there will be insignificant humidity added by the fire's mist.

        https://www.quora.com/How-much-water-does-a-person-lose-in-a-day-through-breathing

        I went and bought one this afternoon - I'll be able to do measurements in a couple of weeks' time.

      2. Stoneshop
        Flame

        Re: Steam flames

        At least these won't then set fire to your oak bath.

    3. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

      Re: Steam flames

      "Unfortunately I'm so far behind the curve that none of my fireplaces has a water supply."

      Mine does!!! There used to be a back boiler behind the gas fire and the pipework is still in place. The water supply for the bathroom runs up the side of the chimney breast. A handy void to drop a bit of cat5e down! I'm all prepared to welcome our new water powered flaming overlords and they can even share my network connection.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Imitation fires

    Thanks for the heads up.

    The Dimplex Aqua-Myst range of fires has a couple of models without heaters that look good for SFX applications. They have come a long way from a rotating fan and an electric light bulb. The water mist technology is used in films to create a convincing controllable inferno effect.

    https://youtu.be/NPuLJ6sk0Yc

    The link to the page is http://www.dimplex.co.uk/believe/index.htm

    Looked at the technology last year for Halloween - now the Silverton looks about right for this year's display. A tad expensive but can be amortised over a good many years.

    http://www.dimplex.co.uk/products/fires_surrounds/Opti-myst/silverton/index.htm

  13. Fink-Nottle

    Gold Bug

    Reminds me of the figures and toys produced by the township residents of South Africa from wire and old tin cans. Originally made as playthings for children, they have been elevated to 'folk art' and sold to tourists - rightfully so, as the items show amazing skill and artistry.

  14. small and stupid

    Now this is designer furniture

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKEOYfYQO08

    Now youre thinking, how interesting can a video of a table be. I promise its worth it.

    1. Alistair
      Windows

      capstan tables

      THOSE are design. And even art (there are a couple video's where they've done contrasting woods/finishes)

      Stuff in article, mostly dross.

  15. Roger Kynaston
    Coat

    Don't let

    that fake leafy pig anywhere near Downing Street!

    1. Warm Braw

      Re: Don't let

      We wouldn't want our beloved leader hedging his bits...

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Don't let

      I really can't think of anyone who'd want a plastic Hedge Hog.

  16. Just Enough
    Holmes

    fake.com

    "I think the internet is one of those passing fads," he confided. He has such disdain for the web that he has threatened to close down The Register if I write about his company"

    This is marketing genius. This guy knows how to guarantee publicity. Don't anyone dare go look at his website, you hear?

    That domain name couldn't have been cheap, either.

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