back to article Chancellor Merkel 'was patient zero' in German govt network hack

The recent cyberattack on the German government began with the compromise of Chancellor Angela Merkel's personal computer, it is alleged. German newspaper Bild claims Merkel's computer was one of the first systems to be infected with malware linked to miscreants in Russia. Hackers reportedly used Merkel's computer to send …

  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Hooooooooooowl...

    If this is true, this would be the howler of the year.

    And whoever did it - applause. Done by the book - the higher the target, the less likely for him/her to be computer and security literate.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Hooooooooooowl...

      "the less likely for him/her to be computer and security literate."

      AFAIK Chancellor Merkel has a doctorate in quantum chemistry - I guess she's very computer literate although not perhaps Windows.

      1. Dan Paul

        Re: Hooooooooooowl...

        You don't need to be very computer savvy to have earned a degree in Chemistry, physical or otherwise. You have to have good math capability and know your subject but computers are only needed for research. All can be done without a PC or MAC.

        More depends on how the curricula and classwork itself is dependent on use of computers. I think the Chancellor went to University back when there was more impetus on book learning than computers.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Hooooooooooowl...

          "but computers are only needed for research"

          It's a PhD for god's sake !!! That is research NOT classroom !!!!!!

        2. Chemist

          Re: Hooooooooooowl...

          "You have to have good math capability and know your subject but computers are only needed for research"

          Not my area exactly but ...You know, presumably, that solutions of the wave equation for anything other than the hydrogen molecule that approximations methods have to be used - that means computers, for anything rather larger , it means BIG computers

          1. x 7

            Re: Hooooooooooowl...

            probably a big computer on the academic network programmed with punch cards.....

            has there ever been a punch card virus?

            1. James Cane

              Re: Hooooooooooowl...

              No punchcard viruses, but they are vulnerable to bookworms.

        3. Tim99 Silver badge
          Boffin

          Re: Hooooooooooowl...

          @Dan Paul,

          She has a Doctorate in quantum chemistry. I am a Chartered Chemist, and was one of the earlier adopters of computers in chemistry. I was (in a a very minor way) one of the people who helped move chemistry from minicomputers to PCs. Almost all chemistry relies heavily on computers, but physical scientists generally consider computing to be just a necessary tool and not an end in itself.

          I started doing serious computing stuff when I had to write a laboratory management system, and a later a financial management system, that would run on a number of LANs connected by a WAN. This included specifying and purchasing and installing equipment and staff training. My "qualifications" were the experience of running a chromatography and high-resolution mass spectrometry laboratory for the organization. This involved connecting together systems that run on DECnet, Token Ring, RDOS, PDPs, VAXen, UNIX minis, PC DOS, CP/M, POS, the Apple ][, and a whole pile of other assorted equipment with serial ports. My recollection was that this was pretty easy compared to mass spectrometry...

          Incidentally as a subtle, but good-hearted, dig at people who "know computing", I was put in charge of computing for 300 scientists (>400 computers) by an organization that did not believe in "putting computer people in charge of computing". Their rational was that people who "did computing" did not always see the needs of the business, and were just as likely to set up systems with a 4GL or Java or whatever was becoming cool at the time because "it was interesting" - Particularly if it helped their career development.

          Angela is a bit younger than me; but back then, even in East Germany, she would have required a fairly detailed understanding of computers to get a Doctorate in quantum chemistry. I expect that nowadays she might be too busy to look after her own computer, so she probably relied on a professional [expert],[security officer],[self-important bureaucrat].

          Disclosure: I learnt FORTRAN as an essential part of my chemistry course in 1969, so my mind is probably damaged - All of the above may, probably, be disregarded.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Hooooooooooowl...

        quantum chemistry

        Did that even exist when she graduated in the DDR? My doubts cannot be allayed...

        1. Irony Deficient

          quantum chemistry

          Anonymous Coward,

          her doctorate is in physical chemistry, but her dissertation involved quantum chemistry:

          Am 8. Januar 1986 reichte sie ihre Dissertation Untersuchung des Mechanismus von Zerfallsreaktionen mit einfachem Bindungsbruch und Berechnung ihrer Geschwindigkeitskonstanten auf der Grundlage quantenchemischer und statistischer Methoden ein.

          (On 8th January 1986 she submitted her dissertation Investigation of the mechanism of decay reactions with single bond breaking and calculation of their velocity constants on the basis of quantum chemical and statistical methods.)

          Yes, quantum chemistry existed in 1986; see the earlier work by Linus Pauling et al. to allay your doubts.

        2. Chemist

          Re: Hooooooooooowl...

          "Did that even exist when she graduated in the DDR? My doubts cannot be allayed..."

          Shows more ignorance - her doctorate was in mid-80s - quantum chemistry had been around since ~1920s.

        3. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Hooooooooooowl...

          Only since 1927.

        4. Michael Dunn
          Headmaster

          Re: Hooooooooooowl...

          A C wrote: "Did that even exist when she graduated in the DDR? My doubts cannot be allayed..."

          Quantum Chemistry has existed since the big bang; it is the study of it that is of fairly recent origin.

    2. Little Mouse

      Re: Hooooooooooowl...

      "the less likely for him/her to be computer and security literate"

      In my experience, these situations have less to do with computer literacy, and more to do with an ego that sets you apart from above mere mortals.

      I've seen some weird shit on the PC's of some corporate big nobs that would get anyone else fired.

      The higher your position it seems, the more likely you are to grant yourself carte-blanche to bypass the security rules and processes that, whilst a pain, are there for good reason.

    3. Mark 65

      Re: Hooooooooooowl...

      Makes you wonder why they don't make key people run a locked down distribution like a Government TAILS or similar.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Hackers based in Russia? Probably Snowden.

    I have to say, since the moment Admiral Canaris was forcefully removed from office, german counterintelligence has been a bit lacklustre.

    1. Tim99 Silver badge

      Re: Hackers based in Russia? Probably Snowden.

      I have to say, since the moment Admiral Canaris was forcefully removed from office, german counterintelligence has been a bit lacklustre.

      Probably not: See Wikipedia - Reinhard Gehlen who, apparently, died of old age.

  3. x 7

    whats the betting the infection comes from a pen drive given to Merkel personally by Putin?

  4. Tromos
    Joke

    did not mention how Merkel herself may have been infected.

    It was probably that nude Herman Goering screensaver

    1. h4rm0ny

      Re: did not mention how Merkel herself may have been infected.

      Yes, yes. She is German and therefore a Nazi. Hillarious. Hold on a moment, I think I have some Amritsar Massacre jokes about the British Empire around here. They're topical, too.

  5. Graham Marsden
    Coat

    I bet they got the idea...

    ... from watching James Bond films...

  6. Alistair
    Coat

    aha!

    So - that's how they shot down MH-17.

    /dons requisite TFH

  7. Robert Helpmann??
    Joke

    A One and a Two and a...

    First the US [allegedly] bugged her phone and now Russia has [allegedly] hacked her computer. If she has a tablet, I am sure the Chinese are interested in having a go. Wait! Perhaps it has already been done, but it was a wetware hack... The newspaper did not mention how Merkel herself may have been infected. Ew!

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    A Quantum Chemist can never be hacked

    because they use Qbits while us peons use regular bits.

    So don't worry people, the Russians only got entangled bits, which require Schrodinger's Cat to be probably killed with a Geiger counter and a poison gas pellet before they will yield their secrets.

    1. Solmyr ibn Wali Barad

      Re: A Quantum Chemist can never be hacked

      Hmm. If there's a QC sitting in Moscow, leisurely flipping qbits, doesn't this flip associated qbits in Berlin? And vice versa?

  9. Mark 85
    Joke

    The only hope...

    .. is that she's being hacked for state secrets and not for her selfies.

    1. Tom 13
      Joke

      Re: The only hope...

      No, there is another....

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Tripping over each other

    It will be interesting to see who else had hacked Merkel's IT. There were 5 countries tapping her phone (including the "allies" such as the US and UK), and how her other information assets have been compromised by multiple parties.

    The Chancellor and the government really should be asking the BND what they are doing - because they were also caught by the Austrians spying. Perhaps Maxwell Smart is running the place.

  11. Rainer

    NSA probably got tired

    of having their RAT getting thrown out by the Russian malware all the time.

    Who can work like that anyway?

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Linkedin

    Yes, it was Putin's Linkedin account reminders....

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Maybe she's trying to prove that as she doesn't have any privacy nobody else should either?

  14. Ole Juul

    selling newspapers

    ". . . it is alleged." and "German newspaper Bild claims Merkel's computer was one of the first systems to be infected with malware linked to miscreants in Russia."

    Instead of discussing the veracity of Merkel's computer skills, it might be more fruitful to question the source of the story. What kind of credibility does the Bild have?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: selling newspapers

      None. Publications from Axel Springer SE and credibility are like oil and water.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Take everything out of BILD with a sack of salt

    Alleged "newspaper" BILD is the biggest transatlantic propaganda spout available.

POST COMMENT House rules

Not a member of The Register? Create a new account here.

  • Enter your comment

  • Add an icon

Anonymous cowards cannot choose their icon

Other stories you might like