Hah
Better than demolishing the local wildlife I suppose.
A real life cat burglar has been implicated in the theft of up to 3,000 individual socks – and a full set of women's underwear. Oscar, a Mandalay cat, has spent the past few years stealing at least one sock a day from clotheslines around Herne Bay, a suburb of Auckland, New Zealand. According to Paul Wai-Poi, the cat's owner …
Thats a myth. A new study shows its reducing vegetation quality especially around town/city belts thats reducing bird and wild life. Add to that an increase in rats and ferrets that come from the citys.
It has been found that if the pest population is reduced, and vegetation quality is restored, the birds come back in greater numbers, and the cat issue has not changed.
For years I have had mismatched socks. I always blamed a gnome or elf (could not be my perfect hounds!) This gnome has been stalking me for years, 'You're crazy!' they all said. Now, I am vindicated and will sleep soundly for once.
The following is the offenders profile I forwarded to the authorities:
Step 1. Steal socks
Step 2. Steal panties
Step 3. ?????????
Step 4. Profit
They should have listened.
I had a white cat that slept in my daughter's sock drawer. My daughter had to wear white socks to school.
From time to time, the cat, wailing throughout, would carry a pair of socks down through the house, out into the garden and bury them. We concluded she thought they were her kittens and she buried them as they 'died'.
This was literally 'rinse and repeat'
Like all cat owners, he takes no responsibility for his *pet* "duh! it's a cat what can I do?". Cats decimate the wildlife, sh1t where they like and seem to love clawing at the soft-top of my car, and now it seems feed their owners used underwear fetish ;-)
It's no joke, my gravel drive is full of their little *packages*, cost me £400 for a soft top for my car, then another £150 for a car cover and I get left little *presents* of their victims (dead birds and mice on my doorstep) bl**dy cats, I'm sick of them - give me a dog any day. On top of that I'm allergic to the damn vermin - rashes, sneezing, asthma - the whole lot. I'm with that Dutch guy - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DTVOK2yvbBM
Right - I think you need a lesson in cat psychology, as it's obvious the local cats absolutely can't get enough of you.
Rule 1: You can't train cats, cats train you. You cannot contain them, you cannot control their behaviour, and you have no influence over what they do. They are categorically the polar opposite of dogs. Your neighbours cat controls him, not the other way around. He can no more take responsibility of it than you can take responsibility of what the NSA looks at on your computer.
Drive is gravel - well that's your second problem, cats are trained to do their business in kitty litter. Replace with lawn or tarmac.
Car has soft top - oh yeah, cats are going to love clawing at them. Remedy is either to get a hard top (which I can't imagine you'd seriously entertain) or get something better than a fabric car roof for them to sharpen their claws on - scratching posts around your driveway, for instance.
As for presents of mice and birds on your doorstep- well, that's just them saying "you're a really crap hunter, but I like your house and the awesome themepark outside it (your drive and car) so I don't want you to starve" (If you haven't noticed, cats are incredibily condescending and dismissive of your pathetic existance and actions.)
You clearly don't like them, and they can tell, the smug little blighters, and they'll hang around just to annoy you - this is classic cat behaviour - ignore you if you pay them attention, and crave your attention if you show signs of not wanting anything to do with them. You firmly fall in the latter camp, and hence you'll be getting loads of attention.
The easiest, and cheapest way of getting rid of your cat problem, would be to get yourself your own cat to guard your territory for you and chase the others off. Might have to be one of those hairless ones if allergies are your thing.