back to article Cable to stimulate stiff growth in entrepreneurs' trousers

Under-fire UK business secretary Vince Cable has launched the government's new £200m "GrowthAccelerator" programme to help small businesses with the potential to do well to actually do well. Meanwhile, Cable was branded a "socialist" by Tory donor and Downing Street advisor Adrian Beecroft on Wednesday, in his report on …

COMMENTS

This topic is closed for new posts.
  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Who pays fir it?

    Will Mr Cable explain what is being cut elsewhere / corporation tax on other companies / adding to national deb to fund this? These stunts are the worst of old-skool Labour disgraced Keynesian economics..

    1. JC_
      Thumb Down

      Re: Who pays fir it?

      "disgraced Keynesian economics"? WTF?

      The current recession, which is being needlessly deepened and prolonged by austerity policies, is a perfect example of why Keynes' analysis and policies remain correct.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Who pays fir it?

        @AC 8:49am - discredited Keynes - the man the pointed out Government funding was the least efficient way of spending money? I don't think that's particularly discredited when it comes to investing in companies.

        @JC_ 'The current recession, which is being needlessly deepened and prolonged by austerity policies, is a perfect example of why Keynes' analysis and policies remain correct' -

        um not that either. Keynes I believe suggested saving money in the good times so you had a public surplus rather than a deficit and debt to be ready for financial downturns. Keynes said don't get in this kind of mess in the first place. You can't approach the later stages of Keynes approach if you don't follow the first stage of having money to spend.

        1. Scott Broukell

          Re: Who pays fir it?

          Quite so, folks do seem to have short memories. I remember either side of 2000 when I knew of many peeps getting crazy mortgages (for needlessly large houses), based on self-certificated earnings, having three, or more cars per family (Dads, Mums and Mums hand-me down(s) for the eldest kiddlet(s) etc.), taking at least three holidays abroad in very reasonable 3-star+ accommodation and being constantly urged by bankers (and politicians), to extend their borrowings even further at every opportunity. It was well and truly PART TIME and we ALL loved it, couldn't get enough of it. Only a few folk thought not to live beyond their means and ,very sadly, our gubbermint certainly DIDN'T.

          For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction - the PARTY IS OVER. But we didn't complain or care to notice whilst it was in full swing did we. Saving funds in the good times is best practice is it not.

          Poor old Greece is a particular case in point - the expansion of the Euro zone was pushed for by the banks and money lenders who knew all too well how nations like Greece would lap up every last bit of cheap money despite their inability, on paper, to pay it all back if it fell due. The Greek politicians at the time must have thought that the populace would forgive them cooking the books cos they would be too busy partying.

          All that to say, no, the Keynesian approach to saving for a rainy day is way too late - it never even crossed out minds. Europe, especially monetary union, was only ever going to work if every nation behaved like Germany. Sadly the majority at 'The Party' lacked the sort of discipline required for such emulation.

          Now every one is happy to kick the can along the road in the hope something miraculous might happen? - cos what's going on isn't even close to applying sticking plasters, let alone approaching fixing the results. No, I don't have the answers and I, like so many, must endure further belt tightening - a good job I'm used to it I suppose.

          Don't bet with anything more than you can actually afford to loose and don't borrow what you can't pay back - simples.

          1. Colin Millar
            Pirate

            Re: Who pays fir it?

            Not just short memories but a complete inability to differentiate between fiscal policy and economic policy. From the 80s onwards we have used the former to cover up a complete absence of the latter - this has been true of every single Western nation. Keynes underlying point is that global economics is a matter of balance and that the never-never is something of a misnomer. It should probably be renamed the never-never-door-kicked-in-man-shouts-give-me-my-money-bitch-while-beating-you-bloody.

            Keynes had more understanding of fiscal discipline in his little finger than those glorified book-keepers Walters/Greenspan et al had in their mantra addled heads. Read Keynes and Smith for economics, read Greenspan and Walters for book-cookery.

          2. Anonymous Coward
            WTF?

            what the hell is a 'gubbermint'

            @Scott Broukell - What the hell is a 'gubbermint' ? Is it like, a mint flavoured gobstopper or something ? Oh and while I'm here, what's with all the shouty-shouty ?

  2. nigel 15
    FAIL

    Worst use of inuendo ever?

    There is no smut angel in this story. 'Cable to stimulate stiff growth in entrepreneurs' trousers' - seems a little childish.

    boobs.

    1. Helena Handcart
      Stop

      Re: Worst use of inuendo ever?

      And of course, because it's a Brid-Aine article, there is the ubiquitous "canned statement". If Apple were somehow involved, there would be a "fruity firm" reference in there somewhere too. It makes me wonder if she has macros set up to avoid typing those canned phrases.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Worst use of inuendo ever?

        @Helena Handcart. The pre-canned apple macro replaces 'Apple' with 'Foxconn rebrander'. It's what you do when you lack creativity ..

  3. Arrrggghh-otron

    £200m just for 'coaching'?

    Did I read that right? £200m and all they are offering is some coaching? Where they hell is the £200m going?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: £200m just for 'coaching'?

      Gluten free biscuits

      1. Ragarath
        FAIL

        Re: £200m just for 'coaching'?

        My thoughts exactly

        I am currently trying to start a business, has high growth potential but getting start up funding is impossible (at least from the UK, starting to look overseas). I don't need much to start but boy is it hard to get.

        I thought this sounded interesting but no they are asking for £600 to tell me to do what I am already trying to do.

        Great. Not.

      2. elsonroa
        Thumb Down

        Re: £200m just for 'coaching'?

        The amount of money available through the TSB for 'Technology Inspired Innovation' grants (ie, helping small businesses with early stage research) is 2 million quid and the competition is massively oversubscribed. The amount of money just announced for 'coaching' those businesses is 200 million quid for a service that most will never use. Anyone else see a problem here?

  4. This post has been deleted by its author

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    200 mil goes....

    ...to the consultants who are providing the advice for presumably 3 years.

    To be honest, I think they'd have done better just organising 200 x 1 million quid 0% 3 year loans for small companies - that would have actually done better....

    1. TheOtherHobbes

      Re: 200 mil goes....

      Done better?

      Not for the consultants.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: 200 mil goes....

        Ahhh yes, i forgot, its actually "trough stimulation", not UK small business...

  6. John A Blackley

    Headline o' the day!

    ...despite the disgusting implication.

  7. Adam Inistrator

    Just good old medieval patronage

    And which prescient business genius is going to make the call on who "have the potential" and gets the money? Some gormless party funky of course. And who will they decide gets the money. More gormless party flunkies of course. The fuckers should just drop income tax for all if they want to promote industry. The cancer in our society is the unlimited public sector.

This topic is closed for new posts.

Other stories you might like