back to article Mink coat thief conceals booty down knickers

A Minnesota woman who swiped a mink coat and stuffed it down her knickers managed to pull off probably the greatest merkin stunt in criminal history by concealing her substantial booty from cops for a full three days. Stephanie Moreland, 46, was cuffed on New Year's Eve after swiping the $6,500 short coat from the Alaskan Fur …

COMMENTS

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  1. Flugal
    WTF?

    Wow!

    I wonder what the coat's value is now? Does it need a clean? What needs cleaning off it?

    1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

      Re: Wow!

      It has been reclassified as a minge coat.

      See, you lot think you're sooooooo *rude*. I would take you to school.

      1. Chris Seiter

        re: wow

        or Beaver Tail.

        1. Magnus_Pym

          @Chris Seiter

          Beaver collar surely. Maybe a trench coat.

      2. Z 1
        Coffee/keyboard

        Brutal

        Careful who you challenge (not me it should be noted) otherwise you may be inundated with filthy posts using imaginative expletives put together by filthy minded gits who love a challenge!

        1. Suburban Inmate
          Gimp

          @ Z 1 - Re: Brutal

          So... A normal day at work for Sarah, then.

          Gimp mask: I wouldn't be seen commentarding in anything else!

      3. Steve Evans

        Re; Re: Wow!

        Ewwwwwww!

      4. This post has been deleted by its author

    2. Magnus_Pym

      Somewhere on the internets...

      ...there is a website that specialises in 'worn' fur coats. I for one am not going to look for it.

  2. banjomike

    We don't want the mink back ...

    ... thank you very much.

    Shop-soiled is not enough!

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Mushroom

    Ummm?

    Would wear a coat after it had been... I don't even want to think about it!

    Burn that Coat!

  4. Chris Seiter
    Unhappy

    Muffception

    A muff within a muff. I am not going deeper.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Coat

      Ahem.

      I believe you meant to say "I am not *diving* any deeper."

      4/10 must try harder.

    2. James Hughes 1

      Having looked at the mugshot

      I don't think going deeper is going to make any difference.

      (See, we can be rude too Ms Bee)

  5. Seanmon

    Yuck.

    Just... yuck.

  6. Mark Jan
    IT Angle

    Urgh!

    So, some US plod visually checked the rear end of the miscreant and decided that a front end check wasn't necessary.

    Looking at the mug shot, I can understand why...

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    WTF?

    A fur coat is hardly a small, compact item, just how big is this woman if she could hide it between her thighs for 3 days?

    Actually, I don't want to know, I've just eaten.

    Mines the fragrant smelling one.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Don't forget

      Most likely the mink coat was for a size zero. I doubt she stole it for herself after all.

      1. Suburban Inmate

        title

        Maybe she was going to nick another one, for her other arm.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    So dissapointing.

    I was desperately hoping for the perp to be called 'Mary Hinge'.

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Its to late..

    .. I already visualized it. I need therapy.

  10. fantamic

    All fur coat and no knickers

    Surprised you missed the obvious heading... or is it too northern?

    1. Elmer Phud

      Northern?

      Certainly not.

      I know of it even in London - though it may have travelled down with those who failed to look on Street View for the 'paved with gold' stuff first.

    2. John Dougald McCallum
      Meh

      Yeah

      ......it's too Northern.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Reconstruction

    Playmobile or it didn't happen!

  12. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Should have put it over her head.

    Dear god...what a mug!

  13. Steve Carr
    Gimp

    The title is required, and must contain letters and/or digits

    Damn merkins

  14. Martin Usher
    Coat

    An expensive coat....

    One of the properties of this type of coat is that they appear big, they're fluffy and warm but they can be compacted to almost nothing (and they're lightweight). The little people don't usually get to experience this, their mock fur (nylon) stays bulky (and the static build up would have been 'interesting').

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Amazing transmogrification!!

    It went in a mink coat, and came out a beaver coat!!

    Leaving as soon as I confirm that my coat has not been "stored" in a similar manner!!

  16. Ray 8
    Paris Hilton

    nooo

    Just thinking about the mechanics of it is making me go blind...

    Paris coz she hides it well

  17. Nick Galloway

    Can't find a coat

    Did the police continue their search?

    If this 'lady' can hide a mink coat for three days then what else has she got tucked away?

    Lost pygmy tribes!?

    1. Peter Simpson 1
      Joke

      If I can find my keys...

      ...we can both drive out of here!

  18. Graham Bartlett

    Took to her heels?

    Look at the size of that walrus - she can't exactly have been keeping up with Usain Bolt. So how fat were the mall cops if they couldn't catch her? Hell, she's lucky not to have had a coronary from the unexpected exercise.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    So, it was a high-value snatch?

    On the whole, yes!

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Go

    Concealment

    I guess that's what they mean by "cunningly hidden".

  21. Pantagoon
    Coat

    Cave Rescue

    An officer did a cavity search but hasn't been seen since.

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