Boss bought cheap 'printer' from a catalog and was left without a leg to stand on

Working in tech can produce a catalog of woes, and each Monday The Register shares yours in "Who, Me?" – our reader-contributed column chronicling tech-related mistakes, heartaches, and back-breaks. This week, meet an Italian reader we'll Regomize as "Marco," who took us back to what he called "The Roaring Nineties, when big …

[Anonymous Coward]

left without a leg to stand on

At least he had a stand or two to lean on.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: left without a leg to stand on

Though probably a bit between stools

[steelpillow]

Re: left without a leg to stand on

>At least he had a stand or two to lean on.

He was lucky they were not long stands.

[Gavsky]

Re: left without a leg to stand on

Very good. Now, you're all fired!...

[Michael H.F. Wilkinson]

If a deal sounds to be too good to be true ...

It probably is.

At least the boss got some "support"

Oh dear, I probably should be going (and it's only Monday)

[just4this]

Re: If a deal sounds to be too good to be true ...

Not tech, but relevant .

Many many moons ago I wandered out of a bar in Spain to grab a packet of smokes from the vending machine. I was used to the prices being much lower than back home in The UK but was impressed with the latest bargain I’d spotted.

A packet for only 15 Pesetas. Well I’ve no idea what these are going to be like but for that price I’ll give them a go.

I got a box of matches. Yep too good to be true, and it was.

[UCAP]

Re: If a deal sounds to be too good to be true ...

A wise man says: "If it looks too good to be true, it probably is"

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: If a deal sounds to be too good to be true ...

At the other end of the spectrum, in Cuba, I bought an actual pack of cigarettes for about 20p in the early 2000s. I definitely got what I paid for, they were made from the cut off ends of cigars (they make them over length during manufacturing then trim to size). It was like smoking a particularly cheap tyre.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: It was like smoking a particularly cheap tyre.

And this is different from other cigarettes... how, exactly?

(Lifelong nonsmoker and hater of cigarette smoke)

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: It was like smoking a particularly cheap tyre.

Cigar tobacco is cured differently for a richer flavour that's also harsher to inhale into the lungs. It's probably non obvious if you're a non smoker but cigarette smoke is fairly smooth to inhale, by smoke standards.

[Eric 9001]

Re: It was like smoking a particularly cheap tyre.

From personal experience of encountering many kinds of smoke, cigarette smoke is harsher to inhale than most kinds of smoke - smokers are addicted and thus ignore the damage to their lungs - even to the point where they're smoking out of a hole in their throat (although, of course it can go even harsher).

I don't inhale 2nd or 3rd hand smoke from a disgusting smoker without immediately noticing the smell and the impact on my lungs - I can notice the insecticide smell up to 100m away too.

[FeRDNYC]

Re: It was like smoking a particularly cheap tyre.

I think it's pretty obvious that the AC was discussing cigarette smoke relative to other smoking products like cigars, pipe tobacco, etc. Not comparing it to your mosquito-repellent citronella stick, incense, hamburger grease dripping onto hot barbecue coals, or whatever regularly wafts up your sainted posterior.

Smokers are well aware that cigarette smoke is harmful to their lungs, they don't actually need you condescending to them about it.

(51-year-old, lifelong non-smoker who never leapt to the conclusion that I must therefore educate stupid or ignorant smokers.)

[Doctor Syntax]

Re: If a deal sounds to be too good to be true ...

"I wandered out of a bar"

That make a change from the usual joke intro.

[Ordinary Donkey]

1,250

When I was still a kid I had work experience and certain people at the office I was sent to were regularly singing "One thousand two hundred and fifty!" like it was some kind of a slogan.

I eventually asked for an explanation and it turned out that an order for 50 of something had turned into 50 packs of 25 in a similar manner and they still found it funny.

[I could be a dog really]

Re: 1,250

OK, who hasn't ever made such a mistake ? I have, though not on that scale. I used to work (doing IT) for an outfit that wholesaled stuff and the confusing combinations of pack sizes was something to behold. Some things were stocked in packs (say a pack of 6), but sold singly - so you had to order 6 to get one pack of 6. Others might be stocked in packs of 6, but you had to order in packs - so ordering 6 would get you 36. As to management of barcodes, well lets just say some members of staff struggled to see why uniqueness was important or why customers (who included some big names) might be unhappy.

And who's never misread the description and found something wasn't what they were expecting - me too :( Though sometimes the vendor is "creative" with the description

[PCScreenOnly]

Re: 1,250

Had that recently on a website. Advertised as "a pair" and then in the order page you could choose 1 or 2

I chose 1 as I wanted a pair. Of course only 1 unit arrived. I complained and they told me it was for a single item. I pointed out UK, stated as a pair so 1 must be a pair

Got a refund, but didn't really expect that kind of mistake these days

[Mishak]

Had that recently with an supplier

Needed some replacement contacts for an R7S lamp holder. Images showed a pair (one with a blue wire, one with a brown wire), which is what I would expect as the lamp has two connections.

It arrived as a single terminal with a blue wire. They happily sent a replacement, as they agreed there should be two - it also had a single, blue terminal.

Still, I did finally have a set I could use...

[CrazyOldCatMan]

Re: Had that recently with an supplier

They happily sent a replacement, as they agreed there should be two

After a dachshund "I never met a cable I didn't want to chew" incident, I needed some Magsafe 3 cables. At least one, but preferably more to take into account future canine-dentition related incidents.

After nearly having a (second) heart attack at what Apple were charging, I found a place that could sell me a pack of three reconditioned leads for about what Apple would charge for one. So I duly ordered them.

A single lead arrived. Now, I'm not usually someone who does reviews but I did leave a one-star review that said "ordered a pack of three, only a single lead arrived. Avoid"

I got a grovelling email saying that they would send me a full pack of three (no need to return the single I already had) and, once it arrived could I please (pretty please) amend my review?

The leads duly arrived and my review went up to 4 stars "issue with the order, fixed promptly".

The irony is that said badger-botherer hasn't chewed a Mac power lead since. Vacuum cleaner mains lead (while it was on!), carpet washer (before first use!) craft lamp (also while on). Fortunately, all repairable with some insulated connector blocks from Wickes/B&Q, a good pair of wire cutters and some time.

He apparently prefers 240v @ 50hz rather than the paltry 9v in a Magsafe 3. Much more of a frisson.

[Gavsky]

Re: Had that recently with an supplier

My tuxedo cat, Bilbo, was the same: chewed through speaker wires (fixed), a mouse lead (dead), partly through an ethernet cable (okay), then attempted the mains cable to a radio alarm. I caught him, bought a bitter-tasting product to wipe 'on me wires'.

[Doctor Syntax]

Re: Had that recently with an supplier

"then attempted the mains cable"

I doubt he'd have made the same mistake twice.

[theDeathOfRats]

Re: Had that recently with an supplier

You've never lived with a cat, have you?

[Someone Else]

Re: Had that recently with an supplier

I doubt he'd have made the same mistake twice.

Are you kidding?!? Cats have 9 lives, and depending on where he was on his inventory, he might well do it more than twice.

[Ivan Headache]

Re: Had that recently with an supplier

Had a client with 2 cats.

I lost count of the number of times he called to say that his BT router wasn't working.

each time it was a chewed cable, sometime the power, sometimes the BT line in.

Not sure if one cat chewed one and the other chewed the other.

Purrhaps they took turns.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Had that recently with an supplier

I've used "split wire loom tubing" to protect things from cat chewing and claws. Get them slightly bigger than the cable. I've only used the solid (other than the split in the side) ones. Although I see some mesh looking ones that specify "Protect Cat from Chewing Cords". I haven't used those.

[Terry 6]

Re: Had that recently with an supplier

Oh yes! 13 month old (now) Fox Terrier pup managed to chew three alarm wires, the internet cable and a USB when in the teething stage.More dangerous wires were prepared for, we put insulating tubes ( for water pipes) round them. But thin wires on the skirting board were just too tempting for her and harder to protect.

[MachDiamond]

Re: Had that recently with an supplier

"I got a grovelling email saying that they would send me a full pack of three (no need to return the single I already had) and, once it arrived could I please (pretty please) amend my review?"

I just received a couple of groveling messages to remove some negative feedback I left in exchange for a full refund on an eBay purchase. The seller failed to mention they were drop shipping the items from Amazon and the "standard delivery" was pony express and they originated a couple of thousand miles from the origin stated on the listing. The tracking number was posted within an hour and the parts started their journey a couple of days later. I wasn't unhappy with the connectors, they were fine, but the seller deserved the negative mark. They understand that it doesn't take much for their fees to go up on eBay so paying back the money might be a good option. My opinion is they'd be better off just being honest up front. What I hate is that some types of things aren't easy to find from a reputable vendor. I'm happy to pay an extra bit of money to have what I ordered ship out promptly from where the listing said it would come from and be shipped via a named carrier.

[I could be a dog really]

Re: Had that recently with an supplier

And eBay makes things harder (I suspect deliberately) by omitting useful filters like "genuine UK seller". I make a point of trying to buy stuff from UK sellers, not someone in China (or wherever) drop shipping using Amazon's warehouse. But there's no filter for that, you go into an item, then look at the seller, and a couple of clicks later you find they aren't UK based (despite having a "UK seller" flag on their pictures). For some items, it can take a long time to find a UK seller in amongst the gazzillion Chinese drop shippers.

[Terry 6]

Re: Had that recently with an supplier

BBC consumer programmes sometimes cover this one.

Often fashion items marketed as luxury materials from a company called say "John Smithshaw of London" with pictures of Tower bridge or the Houses of Parliament.

But turn out to be shit fabric of random shade and dodgy sizing shipped from China with a return policy that means it'd cost more to reject them than they costed.

Often sold by Facebook market place ads.

Why anyone would buy stuff sold on there is a deep mystery. But people obviously do.

[MachDiamond]

Re: Had that recently with an supplier

"Often sold by Facebook market place ads."

Well, there's your problem. ~ Adam Savage

[Ivan Headache]

Re: Had that recently with an supplier

I'm on eBay right now, looking for some film cleaner.

Found this one.

Looks like it costs £11.99. (£0.40 / Unit)

Can't find any reference to the unit!

[MachDiamond]

Re: Had that recently with an supplier

"And eBay makes things harder (I suspect deliberately) by omitting useful filters like "genuine UK seller". "

What I would like to have is a "blocked seller" list so I don't accidentally order again from one of these place.

eBay also doesn't check up on sellers with multiple accounts. It's not allowed, but I expect that's only for US/UK/EUR sellers.

[J.G.Harston]

Re: 1,250

That happened to me just a couple of weeks ago.

Needed some simple window locks - y'know, the ones you put on the bottom two corners of a sash window and screw a bold into with a key to stop the sash rising.

There on $BIGSTORE's website was a pair of window locks, nice piccy showing a pair of them. Ordered them online. They turned up. Opened the little cardboard box, and.... yes, one window lock.

[bernmeister]

Re: 1,250

This brings to mind a tale that may be true or not. The story goes that a training officer in the GPO needed to fit 5 galvanized steel steps to a shortened tephone pole for training purposes. He duly opened the GPO rate book and odered 5. A few weeks later an articulated lorry turned and the driver asked "do you have a forklift?". It turned out the delivery was 5 as ordered, but 5 crates of 1,000 steps. I dont know the end result.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"It turned out the delivery was 5 as ordered, but 5 crates of 1,000 steps."

I think the story was exaggerated. The raw metal price of 5,000 would have been expensive enough to spot the difference. That is, if the purchasing agent was able to see the price/weight. I expect that many government purchases made from an approved government purchasing list might not have a full listing of information. Knowing the price would be problematic, right?

[Noram]

Re: 1,250

Going back many, many moons my father worked for a company that sold forkifts and spares for them in the spares/stock control department for a couple of years.

Apparently the forks were always sold in pairs but the pricing was per fork, and stock code was for one fork. This led to many annoyed customers who were charged twice what they were expecting and all sorts of problems for the people managing and selling the spares as depending on who wrote the order out/how it was entered into the early computer, who shipped the order etc it was easy to get wrong. Apparently it was not uncommon for 1 or 4 forks to be sent out rather than the 2 that they were meant to send, meaning customers frequently had to wait for a second shipment (not good as many of them were in commonwealth countries and shipment was by sea), and the stock information available to the staff was often showing stock that was not actually there.

My father tried to get it sorted out by working with the computer team and coming up with a new set of order forms etc for the forks (and several other bits old as sets but priced individually) so it was always clear how many individual forks etc were being ordered/expected to be dispatched, but it never got approved.

The company had many such issues, and unsurprisingly went bankrupt (and was bought out by the Germans) in the early 80's when more competition became available from companies that were run far better.

[Mast1]

Re: 1,250

Singles vs pairs: many years ago, I was in a shop selling equipment for the outdoors enthusiast, specifically, walking poles.

One design incorporated a camera mount thread inside the handle. The handle was denser and more solid than typical on such poles, so added extra weight, usually an anathema in outdoor equipment. Still a monopole camera stand was potentially useful.

The shop sold them either singly, or slightly less than twice the single price as a pair. But why would you want two camera mounts for a single user ?

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: 1,250

"But why would you want two camera mounts for a single user ?"

So your two hiking poles weigh the same when you don't have a camera mounted on one.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"One design incorporated a camera mount thread inside the handle."

The joke's on the buyer, then. If you are lugging a giant telephoto lens, something other than your arms is good to prop it up, but it's not the same as putting the camera on a tripod for stability.

I have a monopod and have used it a couple of times in a decade. Both for propping up a giant lens at a rocket launch as the first time I just went handheld, I paid for it the next day.

[The Oncoming Scorn]

Re: 1,250 Candles

Shopkeeper (Ronnie Corbett): Morning, sir?

Customer (Ronnie Barker): Four candles.

Shopkeeper: Four candles? (Walks over, gets four candles and puts them on the counter) There you are, four candles.

Customer: No, fork `andles.Shopkeeper: Well, there you are, four candles.

Customer: No, fork andles! 'Andles for forks!

Shopkeeper: Fork handles. Thought you said "four candles." (Tries to clear his ears/understanding) Right. Next?

[Gavsky]

Re: 1,250 Candles

Few know that this sketch is part of the British Citizenship Test - 'Explain This, Then"...

[Giles C]

Re: 1,250 Candles

For anyone who doesn’t speak English as their first language that would be a challenge.

I still think it is one of funniest sketches, although the authors society for pismounciations comes pretty close….

Even now I often use the wrong worms when spooking….

[Someone Else]

Re: 1,250 Candles

"In 'artford, 'ereford, and 'ampshire, 'urricanes 'ardly hever 'appen!"

[Fr. Ted Crilly]

Re: 1,250

Ahh nothing I can think of would hold Candles to that sad tale...

[saxicola]

Re: 1,250

This happened to me this week. A "three for the price of two" on the well-known-auction-site. One arrived, because I chose 1 (three for the price of two). After several e-mails I got an apology and another two cables

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: 1,250

In my experience, both the print catalogues and even today in on-line listings it's remarkable how basic information about the product is missing, whether that's size, weight, colour, count, and sometimes what the product is. The only explanation is that catalogues and listings are being created by disinterested people who don't try to think like a customer.

This is true whether talking of relatively specialised retailers like CPC, Screwfix, Wickes, or general tat merchants like Amazon. All of these companies have some excellent listings which detail everything you might reasonably need to know, and yet other listings where there's little information, or absolute basics are missing.

[Andy Non]

Re: 1,250

I've often skipped past items on Amazon due to them missing basic information such as size. How do they expect to sell those items?

[Doctor Syntax]

Re: 1,250

Even worse are the sellers on eBay who try to sell something ornamental without an image. Add in the occasional out of focus image or one rotated by ninety degrees.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"I've often skipped past items on Amazon due to them missing basic information such as size. How do they expect to sell those items?"

In the reviews you come across statements that the item seemed a bargain until it arrived and was a scale model for a doll house or model railroad. Sometimes the image is of the full size item.

[Antron Argaiv]

Re: 1,250

You know, it happens often enough, that I don't think it's accidental.

Which is a shame, because some of the stuff might be useful, if only they'd remeber that people want dimensions and weight.

[Adair]

Re: 1,250

Does anyone still know that 'disinterested' and 'uninterested' are NOT synonyms? Disappointing loss of a very useful meaning in the word 'disinterested'. Entropy really is a thing—including in human language and understanding.

[Mishak]

Multiples and price-breaks

It's often woth "doing the sums" when you want more than than one as the price for the number you want can be more than the price for a few more - for example when you want 8 but the per-unit cost means you'll pay more than 10 at the 10+ pricing.

[Noram]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

Ah the memories of going through the Maplins catalogue to find that it was cheaper to buy 100 5mm Ultrabright red LED's than the 24 I actually needed, or that the cost for 100 resisters was less than the cost of 15 of them. I think I've still got a bunch of 555, 4032's (I think was the one) and various other chips in the garage because of that.

When Screwfix was starting up there were some great bargains if you paid attention (there are still some nice discounts), I bought everything to upgrade our central heating from a timer only, to thermostat plus thermostatic radiator valves and it was cheaper to purchase a box of 12 thermostatic valve sets than the 7 we needed, I think I used the last of the spare heads last year around 25 years after buying them :) (and I still have something like 10 of the actual valve bodies as each head had 2 bodies and a lockshield cap).

Those lessons taught me, as you say to always do the maths when buying stuff that is available individually and in bulk box and works quite well in the supermarkets as well these days.

[KarMann]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

The one that always gets me is when you work things out and find that e.g. buying a dozen single items actually costs less than the bulk purchase of a box of a dozen of them. Brings up the questions of both whatever happened to the usual quantity scaling, and how do they sell any of those bigger but more-per-piece packs?

[Martin an gof]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

There are lots of examples of this sort of logical confusion though. When they were younger I'd often take a sprog to the supermarket and force them to work out if buying two 910g bottles of ketchup was cheaper than a single 1.2kg bottle (or whatever the actual sizes are). Slightly easier these days as many supermarkets print the "per g" price on the label, complicated by the fact that you have to check that you aren't reading the loyalty card price if you don't have one, or doing some further mental maths if (as I've seen with ketchup), the cost-per price is given in grams for one bottle but in milliliters for another; it's not water where 1g = 1ml.

Another example is train ticketing. There are websites out there which specialise in "split ticketing" because, to use their example, it can often be cheaper to buy a ticket from Birmingham to Derby, a second ticket from Derby to Meadowhall (Sheffield) and a third from Meadowhall to Leeds than it is to buy a single Birmingham to Leeds ticket. So long as the train you uses calls at those intermediate stops your three tickets are all valid and you don't have to leave your seat, just make sure to present the correct ticket to the inspector!

M.

[Terry 6]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

Ah yes, the different kinds of measurement problem.

At one point I was buying casting resin. From Amazon, because I have vouchers. Some were in litres. some in odd ml sizes (630ml say), some gave a price per ml to use for comparison, but many didn't. Some were in ozs and so on. And all with massively varying costs per unit - some could be twice as expensive as another one. And £20/litre v £20 per 500ml makes a lot of difference.

I ended up with a spreadsheet to work out which to buy each time I needed to order.

[IanRS]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

I came across this recently, on Amazon, 1 item for £12 or a pair for £27. I ordered two singles, and checked the order list carefully.

I wackiest similar case I ever encountered was railway ticket pricing. I spent a couple of months working away and travelling home by train for the weekend, and because I had had a lift for the first trip the return tickets were the 'wrong way round', coming home then going away. Each ticket cost me £9 - it was a long time ago. For the very last trip I only needed a single. "That'll be £10 please." I bought a return.

[The Oncoming Scorn]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

I've had a few similar:

The first was where I was travelling back to Devon from Dartford every weekend so I was on a "weekend (open) return ticket" typically 50 quid.

One bank holiday weekend, I while block booking my tickets in advance for the next few months I noted that the weekend ticket in First Class was a tenner cheaper , the downside was I ended up sharing a carriage with Noel Edmonds. That combination of low fare &\or Noel never presented it self again.

The second while looking into flight tickets from Canada to the UK I widened up the departure dates by adding one day & subtracting a day. For some quirk of website pricing the flight prices came to something like $50 & $30 for each journey + taxes & fees (Saving about $260) (At the time, unlike the UK, Canadian flight bookings weren't displaying the all inclusive price).

The third was recently booking a return flight back to Canada from Dublin as it was $225 (Which by the time a hotel, car rental drop off fee & a Ryan Air flight from Bristol was added) was still cheaper than the $890 from Heathrow.

[CrazyOldCatMan]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

was still cheaper than the $890 from Heathrow

At Ork[-2] we discovered that, on the rare occasion we had to go into London, it was half the price of a $HERE to Paddington ticket if you got a $HERE to Slough + Slough to Paddington ticket.

Mind you, it did involve sitting for a hour or so in Slough station, potentially being exposed to the zombie apocalypse going on outside.

[Doctor Syntax]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

And hoping the kindly bombs were having a day off.

[MachDiamond]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

""That'll be £10 please." I bought a return."

Airlines will sometimes ding people if they buy a return ticket and only use half or get off at a hub airport with the ticket to the final destination is less expensive.

[MachDiamond]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

"The one that always gets me is when you work things out and find that e.g. buying a dozen single items actually costs less than the bulk purchase of a box of a dozen of them."

It can be down to the manufacturer standard size packaging. If they don't sell a lot of the dozen packs, but lots of singles, it might cost more to run the packing line in set up costs for the 12 packs. I see that a lot with the big box stores vs my favorite warehouse grocery. I have some notes on my phone for shelf stable things I buy all the time so I can verify if the pricing is better with the monster packs at the big box. If it's the same or close, it may not be a good deal to have so much on hand.

[PB90210]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

The demise of WH Smith... pricing things at £1 each or 2 for £2.50!

[MachDiamond]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

"pricing things at £1 each or 2 for £2.50!"

That's happens all of the time. I always find items at the grocery store that are more expensive per unit weight for the larger package. I'm happy to buy two of the smaller ones so I can leave one sealed until I've used up the other.

Anytime you see an exclamation mark on a price, it's a warning.

[Andy A]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

It happens all the time in supermarkets. You can have a pack of two for £1.95, or two individual ones at 95p each, and people will still buy the pack of 2.

[MachDiamond]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

"I think I've still got a bunch of 555, 4032's (I think was the one) and various other chips in the garage because of that."

The trick is to have the components well organized so if you ever need one again, you know where to look.

I've been putting effort into making places for things as I like buying from estate sales. Fasteners, electronic parts and small bits of hardware go for next to nothing. I bought a full set of taps and dies in both imperial and metric for $10. The Huot drawer box cost $150, but it saves me a trip to the hardware store when I can't find one I need. If the drawer is empty, I know for sure I don't have it. After going to the store to buy one (if they have it and the help knows what I'm talking about), I'll find one I have when that thing hasn't been put in it's place.

I've also standardized on a couple of sizes of plastic storage bins with latching lids. I buy them by the dozen online now that the local store shifted to cheap Chinese copies. The shelves they sit on look nice and orderly and I can keep the bits and bobs for classes of things in one place.

Buying food staples in bulk is a good way to save money if you have proper storage containers. It's not always getting a much better price, but the acquisition cost. I know if I'm keen to make flapjack, I've got plenty of rolled oats.

[MachDiamond]

Re: Multiples and price-breaks

"for example when you want 8 but the per-unit cost means you'll pay more than 10 at the 10+ pricing."

Electronic components are like that. A few 1/4w resistors are expensive per and not that much better at 10, but at 200 (a standard pack), they are cheap as. I may have more of some values than I'll use up in a lifetime, but they've come cheap. I try to use up those odd values when I just need something close. An 11k can work just fine as a pull up/down as a 10k so if I have a load of 11k, I'll use those to retrieve some value from them.

[Seajay]

Re: 1,250

To be fair, apparently those two words have spent centuries in a game of musical chairs, swapping their definitions between them, so it's probably not surprising they are still mixed up today.

[Ivan Headache]

Re: 1,250

Ah, Entropy.

We had some of that growing up our wall.

Beautiful flowers.

[Jou (Mxyzptlk)]

Re: 1,250

Today is worse. You have to doom-scroll two minutes of useless marketing crap to finally get to the "tech spec" link. And CTRL+END does not work, you have to doom-scroll.

[Doctor Syntax]

Re: 1,250

That assumes there actually is a tech spec.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"And CTRL+END does not work, you have to doom-scroll."

I use the other option, go someplace else. There's often a review site somewhere that has copy/pasted the specs.

[NXM]

screwfix

I love their search function. Put "blue paint" in and you get 9000 results which all include "blue" or "paint" where the tin of actual blue paint is many many pages down the listing. Which you can't bother looking for so you order some off B&Q instead.

Surely someone's told them about this, but they clearly can't be arsed to do anything about it.

[JWLong]

Re: screwfix

That's why you put blue paint in quotes, "blue paint" to get an exact match.

At least that's the way most search engines are supposed to work, sometimes, if you're lucky enough and hold your head at the correct angle and cross your fingers(or toes)!

[NXM]

Re: screwfix

You're right, that's how it's supposed to work in everybody's universe except screwfix's. I tried "cleaning kit" just now and the results included mouse killer kits. Hmm.

[Aladdin Sane]

Re: screwfix

What do you expect from a company with an office in Yeovil?

[MachDiamond]

Re: screwfix

"I love their search function. Put "blue paint" in and you get 9000 results which all include "blue" or "paint" where the tin of actual blue paint is many many pages down the listing. "

That's standard at Ace, Home Depot and Lowes in the US. The sites fail if you try to sort by anything other than "recommended" or "best match". They've even started including items stocked in another store even if you've ticked that you want to search for something that's in stock at your chosen store. If your local hasn't any, you'll get a page of selections that are not only not in stock within a couple of hundred miles, but can't be sold you your state (for us USasians). Brand swapping is also good sport for them. If you are looking for Krylon Semi-flat black and they don't carry Krylon brand paint, they'll try to sell you something similar, which isn't if you need to match something or need one more can to supplement the 5 you have for a project. 95% chance that the two formulas will be incompatible if you try to use both and fail to set or blister.

[GrizzlyCoder]

Re: screwfix

You have got to be kidding about B&Qs website being better for searching.... theirs is utter shite and even the staff agree

[Aladdin Sane]

Re: screwfix

Same company

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: 1,250

It's worse than that, the person setting out the catalogue *thinks* they know what the customer wants, but end up making everything worse.

Why yes, I am thinking of a specific example (hence anon)

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: 1,250

I was looking for a climbing net for the kids' play structure recently. The number of different vendors who said in one place (like title) that the net was hemp, and in another said it was jute, was depressing. If you don't even know what your own product is made of...

[herman]

Re: 1,250

And then when you receive the net, it is Brown polyethylene

[GrizzlyCoder]

Re: 1,250

Yeah Screwfix seem particularly bad at this... I wanted some threaded eyelets and they gave the gauge of the steel, the length top to toe, but not the diameter of the hole in the eyelet!! Fortunately a disgruntled reviewer provided this info.

[A Non e-mouse]

Re: 1,250

I ordered some connectors from Mouser. It listed them as a pack of 50 for £30. I ordered one (pack) which they charged me £30 for. They sent just one connector. I complained and they said that £30 price was for 50 connectors and as I had only ordered one, they'd had to split a pack and so charged me for the whole pack.

Wankers.

[Doctor Syntax]

Re: 1,250

Send it back for a refund. See how they like paying £30 for one.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"Send it back for a refund. See how they like paying £30 for one."

I bought a reflector for a strobe and the numpty in the shipping department sent a master pack of 4. I thought I was in trouble when I went to collect the box from the post office. Good Bog, I thought, that's not going to be useful. I let them know they sent too many and they asked me to send the spares back. They did send a return label, for UPS, which is a 30 mile round trip if the closest shipping depot will accept pre-paid returns or a 70 mile round trip to get to a UPS Store. I told them to pay me since the price of petrol is through the roof. I also tried to explain to the CSR that the cost to ship back this massive box was way more than their cost/price of the reflectors. They are light, but bulky. Just what they paid to send me this lot was more than the cost of the four items put together. My only reason for telling them of their mistake was so they could alert the shipping department/warehouse company that they needed to pay more attention.

I'm keeping the spares, but I don't have a use for them right now and finding room to store them is an issue.

[Sam not the Viking]

Re: 1,250

There's also the trick of pricing 'each' but selling in multiple units only.

Of course I've never been caught out by this scam, but I do have 49 spare connectors available for immediate dispatch.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"but I do have 49 spare connectors available for immediate dispatch."

That's all? You need to come round and look at my shelves. I've been at this game for a mort of decades now.

I could by one for $1 plus shipping, or I could get 10 for $1.50 and the same shipping charge. If I buy one, it will be bad or I'll stuff it up trying to fit it so I better have 2. 10 is less money so I wind up with 9 spares since Murphy intervenes and with so many to hand, one will be all I wind up needing. Lather, Rinse, Repeat.

[lglethal]

Re: 1,250

Dont get me started on electrical suppliers, there all wankers.

I've lost count of the number of times, where you contact them for a quote for 1 or 2 pieces of an item.

No problem they say. Here's our quote with the per unit cost. Oh by the way there's a minimum order quantity for 50 units. So a single part costs a couple of hundred, but thanks to their MOQ, you're looking at an effective cost of €10k because you only want 1 bloody item!

This would be more acceptable, if we were talking about parts which would basically necessitate a whole new production run, or if the MOQ was a reasonable number. But they also do this with standard Norm parts, and the MOQ is NEVER a reasonable number. I once got a MOQ requiring 263 items to be purchased (WTF?!?).

Electrical Suppliers really take the cake on this. (and then demand you buy more cakes before they'll even consider giving you a slice...)

[I could be a dog really]

Re: 1,250

Last time I was at the electrical wholesalers, I asked for "2 lengths" of various sizes of conduit. "It comes in 3m lengths" the chap says, so I confirm "yes I know, I want 2 lengths".

What did I find outside, yup, just one length as despite me saying "2 lengths" several times, he'd only heard "2 metres".

[J.G.Harston]

Re: 1,250

20+ years ago I was redoing the wiring in some flats, and so needed *reallllly* long meter tails.

"20m of red 25mm please"

He measures it off.... then STARTS FOLDING IT INTO ONE-METER LENGTHS!!!! I quickly grab it off him before he irretriveably converts my 20m meter tails into 20 x 1m metre tails and loop it up into an open roll.

[PB90210]

Re: 1,250

Needed a couple of 10m fibres... located some in the stores left over from an old project... discovered them in a padded bag, folded neatly in half so they fitted the undersized bag

[The Man Who Fell To Earth]

Re: 1,250

This is why once you know the exact part you want, it's worth checking Amazon. There seems to be a whole ecosystem on Amazon of people splitting packs of commercial electrical and industrial hardware components and selling them as individual components. The markup often looks a bit much but it's often worth it given the minimun order size or minimum dollar amount policies of commerial suppliers. So investing another minute specifically looking for the component (by part number) on Amazon is worth the extra effort.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"This is why once you know the exact part you want, it's worth checking Amazon."

I guess, if you are willing to risk getting a counterfeit item.

For electrical parts, I imagine that some local contractors have had to buy a crate of something when they only needed 1/2 a crate for a job. It can make sense to ask around even though retail sales aren't really their thing. This is where cash can speak very loudly. They write the goods off as spoiled/damaged and a few cases of fizzy drinks shows up in the lunch room fridge.

[that one in the corner]

Re: 1,250

On a small scale and just descriptions, not packing numbers ('cos I hit reply to the wrong comment):

Buying sewable "lilypad" LEDs for an introductory "My First Wearable" class, tried to get a range of colours for them to use[1]. You used to be able to get every shade of LED in this form, but at the moment it seems to be just glaring R, G, B, W - no subtlety at all. Did score some orange from one vendor and ounk is still around, iff you get a set with, guess what, R,G&B at a high price.

Thought I'd lucked into someone with some purples left, at a price. When they arrived, the light up red :-( But - and on close inspection, you can read the description like this - the PCB is, indeed, purple! The LED, not so much.

[1] you can get sewable addressable RGB LEDs, *but* the LEDs are large & ugly when not lit (which is stoopid as using the smaller parts would be better in every way, except these may be hand placed) *and* there are zero, none, nada sewable *small* MCU boards, with just 2 or 3 GPIO exposed, to be a sensible choice for the My Second (or Third[2]) Wearable class

[2] Third you add sensors and introduce actual coding, then it gets fun!

[Peter Gathercole]

Re: 1,250

Not my mistake, honest. I ordered 2x64MB memory upgrade kits for a couple of AIX servers (back when UNIX systems ran in 64MB of memory, but ran better with 128MB), and ended up getting 2 boxes each containing 32x32MB DIMMs (8 times more than I had ordered). This was when memory bought from the system vendor was pretty expensive.

I took the ones I knew we had ordered out to install, and was just working out where to use the rest when my manager said "Put them in a cupboard, and leave them there for a month or two before installing them, just in case the mistake is spotted". Unfortunately, it was. About 6 weeks later we got a tentative email asking whether we had received exactly the amount we ordered, and being honest, we admitted we had received more, and duly returned the excess.

Shame, really. Each kit was worth around £1000 at the time (mid '90s, ECC memory at IBM prices), so was worth quite a lot!

[that one in the corner]

Re: 1,250

> Each kit was worth around £1000 at the time

Peanuts compared to current prices!

[The Oncoming Scorn]

Re: 1,250

I worked at one place & instead of a "specialist" one off order for a high end GFX card we received a box of 20.

The boss added them to stock & sold them, no freebies for the staff either. :(

The other instance was getting a two sets of vertical blinds for my Canadian Home, alas only one in stock in our local store, but as luck would have it in stock in Calgary, I had a interview & popped in to purchase the second one afterwards.

Couldn't find them on display & with a shop assistants help we located it on a higher racking, got them down & off I went to the checkout, where the box wouldn't scan.... so a quick lookup later I paid & left the store to load up into my car, only the box wouldn't fit this time, after some fighting I decided to unpack the box, to find I'd received the OEM box of two.

Took both home fitted & returned the spare to our local Home Depot as not required.

[Erythrite]

49 of The Crying of Lot 49

Well before Amazon took over the book market, a housemate of mine wanted a copy of Pynchon's "The Crying of Lot 49", which for some reason was unavailable, so he placed an order.

A few weeks later, 49 copies arrived! I think he had paid for only one. The bookseller was uninterested in a return, so we had these around for a long time, making us all look a bit more well read.

[CrazyOldCatMan]

Re: 49 of The Crying of Lot 49

Well before Amazon took over the book market

Well before amazon.co.uk crawled out of the primordial slime, I used to order physical books from the US store. I'd get together enough books that I wanted to read to fill a decent sized box and place the order for surface delivery - which would take about six weeks.

Six weeks later I'd order the next box. Thus ensure that my 4-5 books a week habit was maintained, supplemented by visiting Waterstones/Borders/Independant bookshops and buying stuff that the US didn't have.

There was a 2nd-hand bookshop in Plymouth (not sure if it's still there) that would give buy books and give a better price if you also bought books from them. When we used to visit MiL I'd always take a decent sized box of virtually pristine [1] books to trade in. And come back home with a roughly-similar amount of second hand books. We still have lots of printer paper boxes filled with books round the house and garage.

[1] I look after my books, even the cheap paperbacks.

[Already?]

Re: 1,250

Unclear ordering, descriptions, general shenanigans you say?

As a youth in the late 70s I ordered a pack of 6 slider variable resistors by mail order for a project forming in my brain. After the requisite 21 day wait, 36 packs of 6 arrived. Still no idea why or how. Errors at both end may have been present.

Around the same time my now long gone mother ran a Gratton catalogue. These were enormous glossy colour catalogues full of everything that you might want to buy, with 12 or 38 weeks credit / payment terms - clothes, electrical goodies, music, ladies underwear (modelled by real ladies, required perusal material for every teenage boy at the time). I ordered a 12 string acoustic guitar, instead a 6 string arrived soon after. Back it went, re-ordered, another 6 string arrived 2 weeks later. This time my good mother phoned them direct to sort it out and after full verbal confirmation it was ordered again. You know the payoff - a 6 string arrived a week later. We gave up.

And then last week I returned a bit of electrical equipment to the manufacturer for repair & upgrade. I emailed to check before sending it - return the base unit only, or unit + all peripherals and cables, on the basis that if they weren’t expecting them to be included I might not get them back. Good question came the reply. Surely that’s a basic bit of instruction, what to include in a return.

[Doctor Syntax]

Re: 1,250

I suppose the logic would be that two 6 string guitars make one 12 string.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"I suppose the logic would be that two 6 string guitars make one 12 string."

To a drummer, sure.

(BTW, I play drums and here's your pizza).

[lglethal]

Re: 1,250

What do you call someone who hangs around with Musicians? A drummer...

:D

Sorry, couldnt resist...

[GrizzlyCoder]

Re: 1,250

What's the difference between a live drummer and a drum machine? You only have to punch the beat into the machine once. Joke told to me back in the late 90s by Dave Irving, ex drummer with Sad Cafe

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

What does is mean when there's drool coming out of both sides of the drummer mouth?

A: The stage is level.

What's the definition of a drummer?

A: A person that hangs out with musicians

How do you get a drummer off your porch?

A: pay them for the pizza

What's the difference between a professional drummer and a large pizza?

A: A large pizza can feed a family of 4

I've got a list.

[ricardian1943]

Re: 1,250

The RAF stores system had "DOQ" or "Denomination of Quantity" - e.g. gallons, litres, packs of 10, etc

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

""The RAF stores system had "DOQ" or "Denomination of Quantity" - e.g. gallons, litres, packs of 10, etc"

I'm used to UoM (Unit of Measure).

[FeRDNYC]

Re: 1,250

The BigBoss at one small situation I found myself in way back when sent his gofer to Staples for a shopping list of office supplies, including... well... actual staples.

We were a 6-person team working out of the home shared by BigBoss and one of the other team members, but the shopper somehow decided that four boxes was the correct quantity of staples to resupply us with. Overhearing this being discussed after his return, I blurted out, "You bought TWENTY THOUSAND staples!??!"

Everyone was all surprised that I'd pegged the quantity, which honestly sort of confused me because most boxes of staples have a "5000" printed right on them in some huge font, and... well... I can multiply that by four? Seemed slightly underwhelming as either party tricks or superpowers go, to me.

[PB90210]

Re: 1,250

Back in the distant past, we had to submit stationary orders monthly, so you went to the catalogue to find your items... 'folders, blue, unit of issue: ea, quantity 10'. A couple of weeks later you would receive either 10 folders, 10 packs of folders or 10 boxes of folders

To confuse matters, one of our other suppliers, if asked to supply 8 widgets and they came in boxes of 10, would take 2 out but leave the box labelled as as box of 10! Hilarity all round when you take that last 'full' box off the shelf to find you are short

[Andy A]

Re: 1,250

That's the problem with Murcan pronunciation. A right ponder would read "106 eggs" as "One hundred and six eggs". A left ponder would read "One hundred six eggs", which is obviously a hundred packs of six eggs each.

[Fred Dibnah]

Re: 1,250

I bet that order was from Radio Spares / RS Components. When they had telephone ordering their operators were very good at checking and correcting quantities, but once it went online you were on your own.

In the BBC someone at a transmitter site needed a few aerial insulators, but somehow added some zeros to the order. The lorry duly arrived, “Where do you want these?” They were squirrelled away to a back room somewhere.

[NXM]

Re: 1,250

Watch the film A Town Called Panic. Cowboy and Indian accidentally order 50,000,000 bricks for Horse's barbecue. Mayhem ensues.

[Emjay111]

Re: 1,250

By coincidence, I have a very similar aerial insulator story as well.

My first job after leaving college was with a county educational AV department. The guy in charge ordered some aerial insulators. Unfortunately, someone in the Purchasing Department got the units wrong, and a massive box of ceramic insulators arrived. We only needed a few.

It then became established practice to fill the coat pockets of any sales rep that visited the workshop with the damn things, in a half baked attempt to get rid of them. Our local RS rep was the prime victim. He must have taken hundreds out of the building over time.

[Martin an gof]

Re: 1,250

With CPC there's now a little pop-up once you "add to basket" so for example you might add two things to your basket and it'll say, "this item has a pack size of 50, you are therefore ordering 100 items, is this correct?"

Works for me.

CPC once did the opposite (of the ordering more than you thought) thing with me.

I'd been using a ladder clamp set (to put ladders on the roof rack safely), bought from CPC. It was basic but it did the job well. One set, supplied as a pair. For reasons which needn't be raked over, it needed replacing so I ordered exactly the same item from CPC again. One set.

They delivered one box, containing five sets.

I rang them up to ask how to go about returning them and the person at the other end did a bit of umm-ing and aah-ing and ended up deciding that the cost of returning them would not be much less than the value of the four items, so I might as well hang on to them.

Used one set, gave a couple away, had occasion to use two sets one time. I think there's still one set in its packaging in the shed.

M.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"the person at the other end did a bit of umm-ing and aah-ing and ended up deciding that the cost of returning them would not be much less than the value of the four items, so I might as well hang on to them."

That's often the case these days. I don't know how, but I see and buy things online with free or very cheap shipping and it may be that return shipping can be at full rates so it can cost more in shipping cost than the whole order (parts and shipping) originally cost the vendor. As I sell things on eBay, it can be frustrating to find the same items I'm selling with free shipping that doesn't make sense. I know the USPS was giving Amazon such an amazing deal on shipping that there was no cushion for issues. Of course, Amazon was only using them for addresses way off the main road and doing all the simple and cheap deliveries themselves. Well, the US post office made it so easy to game the system.

[The other JJ]

Re: 1,250

In my first job in IT in 1984 I ordered a box of screen wipe sachets from the firm's usual stationery supplier. They normally came 50 to the box, but you can guess the next bit. We told them but for some reason they couldn't organise a return so we had 50 boxes for the price of one. Try as we might to use them up we'd barely got through the top layer by the time the company was taken over several years later and the department closed.

I still have some sitting on the desk in front of me and at least one full box in a cupboard.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"Try as we might to use them up we'd barely got through the top layer by the time the company was taken over several years later and the department closed."

I was given a massive load of wipes that I've finally given away. They were past date and I didn't see why they'd have a date at all other than they will sometimes dry out if there's any puncture in the thin/cheap packaging. I like those sorts of deals as it makes me plenty of friends. A local church with a preschool was very happy to get a load of them. I'm not a churchgoer, but I did net several good contacts as they do lots of things in the community.

[Eric 9001]

Re: 1,250

Disinfectant wipes do expire.

The moisture eventually passes through the thin packaging for wet wipes (which is what the expiry date indicates), but that doesn't matter if you're okay with moist or dry wipes.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"but that doesn't matter if you're okay with moist or dry wipes."

A church preschool is perfectly happy with free _________. Wet, moist or dry, they'll find a use for them.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: 1,250

Anonymous for reasons which will be obvious.

I work for a car parts wholesaler/retailer. We have so many examples of things like this.

1. Screws where you need 12 per car but we only se3ll them in packets of 10.

2. Brake discs on our website priced singly, but the picture shows a pair and the description says we only sell in pairs for safety reasons, but the website allows orders for singles.

3. Door seal sold per metre where a customer might order 7 metres because you need 3.5m per door and someone in our warehouse doesn't think and sends out 7 x 1m lengths.

4. Packets of parts clearly labelled "Pack of 50", "Pack of 100" where customer orders 1 and someone in the warehouse picks and sends a single part instead of a single pack of 50.

My personal one was I ordered 1 of what I thought was a 4 pack of baking potatoes from Tesco online and received 1 potato. So the next time I ordered 4 and received 16 potatoes in 4 packs of 4.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"My personal one was I ordered 1 of what I thought was a 4 pack of baking potatoes from Tesco online and received 1 potato. So the next time I ordered 4 and received 16 potatoes in 4 packs of 4."

Why would you order food online? Not that particular about what you get?

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: 1,250

There can be good reasons for online shopping.

For example, didn't say when that happened. Maybe it was a few years ago when something happened that made a lot of people turn to online food shopping.

[The Organ Grinder's Monkey]

Re: 1,250

In the very earliest days of online supermarket deliveries here in the UK, a mate tried the service out as he had a houseful of very young children, an appropriately stressed wife & a journey to his most proximate supermarket that, whilst not long as the crow flies, was entirely on terrible country lanes so took ages.

A few days before their first order he'd nicked the fuse out of the wife's hairdryer to fix something in his workshop, & was forcibly reminded to add fuses to the order, on pain of death, or worse.

The (large) order arrived, & there at the bottom was a pack of fuses, but they were Cadbury's fuses, (a chocolate bar for non-UK / young readers.)

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: 1,250

"Why would you order food online? Not that particular about what you get?"

There was this thing called lockdown, and as someone who had to isolate at home alone for 18 months, I relied on grocery deliveries.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: 1,250

Also handy if you don't have the time, or are too sick to shop, or...

[ricardian1943]

Re: 1,250

Not computer-related but In March 2026, the Tesco Kirkwall Superstore in Orkney accidentally ordered 38,000 bananas

https://orcadian.co.uk/bananas-tesco-give-away-free-fruit-after-ordering-glitch/

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"Not computer-related but In March 2026, the Tesco Kirkwall Superstore in Orkney accidentally ordered 38,000 bananas"

I'd take all they'd like to give away!. Freeze-dried banana chips are a massive favorite and I'll pay the power bill to run as long as necessary if the bananas are free. I'm also a fan of smoothies so I always have frozen banana chunks in the freezer.

The freeze dried bananas make great gifts and when all else fails, I'll do a big batch of mini banana muffins much to the dismay of my waistline if I can't give enough away. They do freeze pretty well.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

I did that at an auction.

There was some nice electronics assembly benches at an aerospace company that was shutting down. I thought it was 10 benches, it was 10 ROWS of benches. Very inexpensive for just 10 benches, but not inexpensive to break them down and take the whole lot away. I suspect that others that did spot the quantity didn't bid as it was just too much. I'll bet that if I didn't bid, I could go back the next day and offer to take away the number of benches I could use for no charge just so they could clear out the room.

[Richard Pennington 1]

Re: 1,250

That reminds me of one of my late father's stories. Back in the 1970s, he was a school headmaster in the city of Leicester [UK]. At that time the school system was run by local education authorities, of which two were relevant: one covered the city of Leicester, and the other covered the county of Leicestershire. And then they were merged.

One result of the merger was that school supplies to City schools were now handled by the County system. The old City system consisted of a lady with a notebook, who could look up exactly what a school had spent, how much they had committed, and how much was still available in the year's budget. The County system involved the central computer at County Hall. [So there is an IT angle!]

Of course, the transition wasn't entirely smooth. City schools used to order pencils by the number of boxes, while County schools ordered pencils by the number of individual pencils. Similarly City schools ordered paper by the number of sheets, while County schools ordered paper by the number of reams.

Of course, the inevitable happened. A City school put in an order to the County system without carefully reading the instructions. And nobody sanity-checked the order. So the school duly took delivery of a hall full of paper and a single pencil.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"Of course, the transition wasn't entirely smooth. City schools used to order pencils by the number of boxes, while County schools ordered pencils by the number of individual pencils. Similarly City schools ordered paper by the number of sheets, while County schools ordered paper by the number of reams."

It seems really bizarre that either item would be ordered/purchased in single units. While you could buy a single pencil at some shops, you'd order by the box anywhere else. Who the heck would think that paper would be ordered by the sheet? You get a ream and when you get low, you get another ream or box if you use a lot.

I learned a good lesson from an electronics firm ages ago. For small, inexpensive items such as screws, they didn't inventory them. The vendor was required to visit the factory and top of the bins as necessary so they never ran out and just billed for what was delivered. The company knew how many were going into products and a rough idea of how many wound up on the floor so the vendor couldn't pad their sales by enough to make cheating worth the risk. The cost of keeping an accurate inventory exceeded the cost of the parts. On the other end, power transistors that cost $15ea were closely watched. I took the lesson and didn't do a proper inventory of small parts, but when I'd get in 25,000 eyelets, I'd have them counted into bags of around 5,000ea. We used about 5k in 4-6 weeks so when we got down to that last bag, there was a note in the stock bin to order more. The price drop at 25k was enormous and let us order direct from the manufacturer rather than a distributor and the lead time was usually 2-3 weeks.

[Terry 6]

Re: 1,250

They aren't buying single sheets of paper as such. But the paper is priced per sheet/batch

So they'd be buying a batch of maybe1000 sheets rather than a pack.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"But the paper is priced per sheet/batch"

Good bog, how many places to the right of the decimal point would the accounting software allow?

[Shropshire Lad]

Re: 1,250

A long time ago, my other half worked as a civvy in a British Army medial units stores. A thoroughly enjoyable time she had, too. One of her oppos ordered a dozen replacement stretchers, but cocked up the part number (NSN). They received rather a lot of helicopter rotor blades.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"A long time ago, my other half worked as a civvy in a British Army medial units stores. A thoroughly enjoyable time she had, too. One of her oppos ordered a dozen replacement stretchers, but cocked up the part number (NSN). They received rather a lot of helicopter rotor blades."

This is where having pricing is important and also limits on the purchasing authority of buyers. Somebody buying medical supplies should be locked out of buying helicopter parts. They should also not be able to spend what it would cost for blades. Helicopter blades are extremely expensive. The stretchers might be too compared to the real world, but not nearly as much, as in, divide by 100,000 or more. Shipping on the blades would be a wee bit more as well.

[RMclan]

Re: 1,250

Military supplies are always expensive. It reminds me of the story about the USAF running out of a particular spare part for the B52.

They only used about 1 every 2 years but they had none left.

They approached Boeing to see if they could get some more made.

Boeing quoted something like $2m to set up production and then a cost of $100k per unit made with a minimum of 50 units.

Instead of paying Boeing, somebody went and removed the part off a number of the mothballed airframes in the desert boneyard at Davis-Monthan airbase and they ended up costing about $50 each in man hours.

[MachDiamond]

Re: 1,250

"Boeing quoted something like $2m to set up production and then a cost of $100k per unit made with a minimum of 50 units."

That's not uncommon for aircraft. The specified tolerance is usually far too tight and the materials have to be documented back to the mine/tree/oil well. I wouldn't be surprised if nobody had a clue where the tooling that was supposed to be kept got put. For a non-wear item, salvage is often the best bet. DMAFB can be an issue as a lot of the aircraft that wind up there are being taken out of service due to a treaty which is why they're laid out and go through slow destruction. The other side's satellite gets the opportunity to snap photos. I don't know if they are allowed to pick parts from those craft.

[GlenP]

Laptops, Supplies

I've probably related the tail previously of a sister company's MD who bought a Sony Vaio from Dixons (for those who don't know, a high street electronics retailer in the UK, part of a group with Currys and Computer World). Just over 12 months later it failed and we diagnosed a driver update was needed, except that there were no drivers available for the device at all - it was a parts bin special, sold directly by Sony Japan to DSG group, once out of warranty nobody would provide any support. So his "bargain" laptop, bought outside of company policies, ended up costing substantially more than if he'd bought a Dell on the corporate agreement.

Not entirely IT but I've had several colleagues caught out by phone calls promising cheap deals on supplies. That's why when we gave up the franking machine we threw out thousands of labels for it, ordered at a time when we we posted a few items a week. We also had a large stock of fluorescent tubes at one time, about three each for every lamp they fitted, but I think most of those went to another plant.

[A Non e-mouse]

Re: Laptops, Supplies

We've had people buy bargain bin items as they said IT's internal recharge price was unjustifiable. After they spend hours setting it up and working around the problems a bargain bin item will inevitably have, it would have cost them a lot less if they'd just paid IT's internal rate. (Which, by the way, includes software & hardware support)

[DownUndaRob]

Currency

I suppose its better than the sales manager not realising that the website showing prices as $ may not be the $ you do business in, especially when your $1 is only worth $0.60 of the websites $.

Of course the company won the tender, probably based on price...

[blu3b3rry]

I'm not sure what the most egregious purchase by a mangler was

Either the £25,000 (each) reverse osmosis water distillers that still hadn't been validated or approved for use four years after they were purchased. Turned out that being high-end models they were so complex that the boss never figured out how to set them up properly. The boss had bought two of them and had installed them himself without asking anyone else on a suitable location, taking up an enormous amount of space in a crammed lab. Added to the fun was the nearest power sockets were the other side of the sinks from the RO units, so we had the DC power bricks sitting tucked between the sink and the wall where they got repeatedly covered in water. Professional!

I was made redundant a few years later, as was the boss, so they are probably still cluttering up the lab and not being used. Every six months or so something in the plumbing would also get a bit dodgy and flood the lab....

Another was a workshop fit-out with ESD benches, to run a pilot line building certain electronics in-house that we normally depended on subcontractors for.

Someone insisted on buying everything from Bott, so the cheaper bits of furniture were over £1500. Sixteen ESD compliant workbenches and a massive set of cupboards, drawers, tool chests, etc. Never found out what it cost in total but the guy responsible for it all never hired any techs or engineers to work on the pilot line, as he couldn't find anyone suitable for the wages he wanted to offer.

A year later we were moving out of the building and the entire project was scrapped. Benches and fittings were re-purposed but a lot of the specialist custom tooling ended up in the bin.

[Red Ted]

Re: I'm not sure what the most egregious purchase by a mangler was

Just looked up Bott... Now there is some workshop furniture to covet, but only if someone else is paying!

[Yet Another Anonymous coward]

Re: I'm not sure what the most egregious purchase by a mangler was

Our small town got a government grant for a new water treatment plant so we only paid 2/3 of the bill

Then COVID happened when it was finished and we couldn't get some filters for 2 years. Now it didn't meet some changed regs.

We're now trying to pay for upgrades that will cost more than the original build. And we still have nasty water.

[Doctor Syntax]

Re: I'm not sure what the most egregious purchase by a mangler was

"Added to the fun was the nearest power sockets were the other side of the sinks "

Always spec a lab to have a pair sockets every couple of feet or so of bench space, certainly not more than every metre (I'm unit agnostic).

[blu3b3rry]

Re: I'm not sure what the most egregious purchase by a mangler was

The boss had also specified the lab wiring layout, and for whatever reason skimped on the number of sockets. This led to only one side of the room having trunking, and as a result extension leads trailed everywhere.

He had the dual qualities of incompetence and being a total prat.

[CrazyOldCatMan]

Re: I'm not sure what the most egregious purchase by a mangler was

Another was a workshop fit-out with ESD benches

One building move, our CEO (in the USA) decided that all our buildings worldwide should look the same and use the same furniture. Despite us sourcing identical units in the UK (there was nothing special about them - just the fabric in corporate colours..) he insisted on shipping all the furniture from California, at considerable expense.

The cubicles arrived and we took one look and winced. Obviously, whoever had ordered them hadn't realised that the UK mains power setup is completely different from the US and they had ordered units that included all the mains power points - in US standard.

Our sparkies took one look at it and told us that all the cabling would need to be ripped out, the baseboards re-cut and all the wiring redone. The quoted cost was not that far away from the quote that we'd had for supplying the stuff locally.

Predictably, our US management refused to allow the extra cost. So we ran for months on lots of 6-socket mains extension leads running from the wall sockets to the cubicles. The place looked like it was put together by a bunch of complete amateurs.

Then the CEO made one stupid decision too many (I think it was his declaration that we should act (and spend) like a billion dollar company, even though we were not). The founders woke up at that point and forced him out, taking back control. I hate to think how much money he had wasted.

The cubicle baseband fixes were authorised in a week and the office started to actually look professional.

Then I got made redundant in the third round (the tech crash was getting deeper and our income had plummeted), had the summer off then got another job. And the company went on to be bought up by a bigger tech company.

[blu3b3rry]

Re: I'm not sure what the most egregious purchase by a mangler was

It's often impressive how some countries struggle with the concept of another country having different sockets and indeed voltages.

We had a lot of cleanroom gear specified, ordered and purchased by the US based client we were doing the production work for. This included lab incubators and ovens used in the production process.

Not only did we have the silly situation of using 300°C lab ovens for processes requiring a 35°C temperature (spoilers - they have really poor temperature control that low) but all ovens and incubators were specified with 110v and imported from the US. As I recall they were bought by the client, shipped to their office in Maryland and then booked onto the regular overnight FedEx run. This normally consisted of a few small boxes each about the size of a large toaster, I can imagine the additional fee for overnight trans-Atlantic shipping of six large lab incubators was rather high...

Apparently the client thought that the 240V model of the incubator would "behave differently" and as a result we had a step-down transformer and US spec wiring fitted at an insane expense.This didn't stop employees from the US client coming over and plugging 110V kit into the UK spec 240V outlets, inevitably letting the magic smoke out.

[ITMA]

Don't even mention RS

RS are another where their "catalogue" contains some surprising disparities about what you are actually getting...

There's the standard one of SSM (standard supply multiple) where sometimes quantity and pricing is per individual item. Then others where quantity and pricing are per "pack of X". Then those where pricing is per unit item but SSM (quantity) is "per pack of X". So to get one, you have buy X (say 10).

Then there are times when their listings are just plain wrong.

We bought some Facom (French brand) steel rules from RS because we specifically wanted ones made in France (as opposed to China) and that's what the listing said. What arrived where some 6" Facom steel rules with yellow RS stickers on the covers saying "Made on France". Engraved on the back of each of the rules was "MADE IN CHINA"....

Seriously RS????

Then there is the "In Stock" bit. If you need something the next day, be very careful to see if "In Stock" is actually "In stock other locations" - which means "in another country". So no chance of you getting it the next day.

[ChrisC]

Re: Don't even mention RS

At least once you've ascertained that RS do have it in stock at a local site, you're still pretty much guaranteed to then get it next day.

Farnell always *used* to be similarly predictable, and their generally better pricing and wider range meant for years they were our preferred supplier for development parts/tools/etc. with RS only being used if absolutely necessary. Over the past year or so however, their "next day" service seems to have quietly transmogrified into "next day after we can be bothered to move it from our warehouse into the dispatch bay and book a collection", which means now typically waiting 3-4 working days before stuff arrives, resulting in RS now picking up the bulk of our business...

[NXM]

Re: Don't even mention RS

Totally same here. I even put up with each item arriving in its own plastic bag.

[GlenP]

Re: Don't even mention RS

You also have to be very careful with Farnell pricing. For some reason some things are significantly cheaper on CPC and some on Farnell, even though they're part of the same company.

[ITMA]

Re: Don't even mention RS

Try looking up on CPC order code CB16242.

£50.20 for a 30.5m drum of Alphawire 7-Core Unscreened Grey Industrial Cable, LSZH Jacket, 22 AWG, 30.5m (100ft) - 1177L SL005

On Farnell under order code 1712545

£107.98 for a 30.5m drum of Alphawire Multicore Cable, Control, Unscreened, 7 Core, 22 AWG, 0.35 mm², 100 ft, manufacturer part number 1177L SL005

Literally, exactly the same cable.

Both have stock yet Farnell is over twice the price for exactly the same product.

[just4this]

Re: Don't even mention RS

Same with Screwfix and B&Q.

B&Q really don’t like it when you make them price match Screwfix.

[MachDiamond]

Re: Don't even mention RS

"Both have stock yet Farnell is over twice the price for exactly the same product."

For RGS (round gray shit), I've always used Anixter in the US (since I'm in the US). They've always had some of the best pricing, but the service has always been amazing.

Way back when I did sound for shows, I could call up my sales person and have him deliver a sample, to a show. I let him know that if that "sample" was over a kilo, he may want to have somebody along to help him carry it. It was a way to give a bit back and ensure we always got good service. For bigger lots when we needed a 100m of something expensive, we had to pay for it, but it could get delivered for free if he was interested in seeing the band. We also wound up doing internal rack wiring in Teflon aircraft-rated wire/cable that we'd get the roll ends of. A long piece for the racks might be a meter, but often it was shorter runs so it didn't matter if we wound up with many shorter lengths.

[Flocke Kroes]

Re: next day

For many suppliers 3 days often arrived in 3 days. Next day used to mean 3 days but with an apology. These days suppliers have cut costs and can no longer deliver an apology.

[Doctor Syntax]

Re: Don't even mention RS

""next day after we can be bothered to move it from our warehouse into the dispatch bay and book a collection"

You can also add "When the carrier company can be bothered to move it onto the van" to say nothing of ""When the van driver can be bothered to try to deliver to the right address".

E.g. Proof copy of book sent by carrier instead of next day post at half the price. Track it sitting the warehouse all day while the site also promises delivery by the end of the day.

Also e.g. Company has form, admittedly from several years ago, of attempting to deliver to wrong address down the lane. Numerous attempts to get them to get it right were ignored .. Same thing happened last week. Now I see they're down to deliver the 100 copy print run that the other company eventually delivered the proof of.

It seems to be industry standard that they don't grasp the first thing about their job, not even who their real customers are and who is the actual owner of what they're transporting (usually the consignee).

[MachDiamond]

Re: Don't even mention RS

"It seems to be industry standard that they don't grasp the first thing about their job, not even who their real customers are and who is the actual owner of what they're transporting (usually the consignee)."

Companies are creating issues by not incentivizing the proper things. They measure delivery attempts per hour, not mis-deliveries. They've off-shored their CS functions to save money. The downside is that address formats can vary by country so having somebody in India reviewing an issue that would be obvious to somebody used to how addresses look in Utah doesn't work. Nor vice-versa, I expect. The real problem gets worse, people aren't getting their stuff. Who cares if the sub-minimum wage drivers are making 60 stops per hour if 10% of them are botched from the start?

In the US, just about every address is in a database. I come across numerous systems where I start typing my address and it is able to fill it in at a certain point. All I need is the street address and the zip code and it can do the rest. If I type 123 Main St, it may give me a choice of north or south main street if both are in the same zip code. It's handy as the address on file with eBay is incorrect for billing when I buy something, but just typing in the street address most of the way gets it. You'd think that with that, an address would be checked when the order is placed. With SatNav, the drivers shouldn't be able to bugger it up.

[RMclan]

Re: Don't even mention RS

"You can also add "When the carrier company can be bothered to move it onto the van" to say nothing of ""When the van driver can be bothered to try to deliver to the right address".

E.g. Proof copy of book sent by carrier instead of next day post at half the price. Track it sitting the warehouse all day while the site also promises delivery by the end of the day."

Sent a shipment by large well known courier from Birmingham to a customer just outside Paris shortly after Brexit.

For 4 days we watched the tracking rotate between being scanned in Gravesend, Rotterdam and Munich, it appeared to go round the circuit 3 or 4 times.

Contacted the courier to find out what was going on. Eventually they worked out that not only wasn't the package going round in circles, it had sat at Castle Donington for 4 days.

Apparently, for small packages they don't scan each of them individually, they get put in a cage and the cage gets scanned at each point.

Somehow our package had got linked to a cage it wasn't in and the cage was travelling back and forth between Gravesend and Munich via Rotterdam. The package had supposedly been scanned into the cage but never scanned back out of it because it never physically went into it.

[elaar]

Re: Don't even mention RS

Not only that, but Farnell love splitting deliveries these days.

I placed an order last Thursday, all components except one were delivered yesterday. The diodes (despite stating "in Stock") won't be delivered until the 28/09.

I can't make a power supply without the diodes, so that's 10 days I have to wait. RS it is next time.

[ITMA]

Re: Don't even mention RS

"At least once you've ascertained that RS do have it in stock at a local site, you're still pretty much guaranteed to then get it next day.

Farnell always *used* to be similarly predictable, and their generally better pricing and wider range meant for years they were our preferred supplier for development parts/tools/etc. with RS only being used if absolutely necessary"

Many moons ago - back in the late 1980's - the company I worked for at the time was in a similar situation.

We generally used Farnell for most components and tools, but used RS if we absolutely needed it the next day (and paid for the privilege) - this was back when the fastest service was "Royal Mail DatPost" (hand up who remembers Datapost?). And virtually EVERYTHING from RS was branded RS (or occasionally still Radio Spares)

If we really needed something urgently, and it was in stock, someone would jump in a company car and collect it from either Farnell's only trade counter in Leeds or RS' trade counter in Corby. We were based on a trading estate on the outskirts of Washington (Tyne & Wear).

[MachDiamond]

Re: Don't even mention RS

"Then there is the "In Stock" bit. If you need something the next day, be very careful to see if "In Stock" is actually "In stock other locations" - which means "in another country". So no chance of you getting it the next day."

For a large supplier with insight into their supplier's stock, the "in stock" can also mean it's in stock at the vendor, ten time zones distant.

[Sam not the Viking]

Genius

Our boss ordered some replacement cartridges for the laser printer, not realising that such consumables are not necessarily interchangeable between manufacturers.... They were expensive, but not nearly as expensive as the genuine (IBM) item. When he was told about the cost of the real thing, a quick calculation enabled him to cancel the IBM contract and buy a new printer, compatible with the cartridges he had actually purchased, and still be ahead financially! It was one of the few times he was allowed to be smug.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Genius

I knew they guy who supplied those IBM printer cartridges. He had the UK monopoly. Much cheaper to buy in the States and ship over!

AC in case he's still around here!

[Evil Auditor]

In the same nineties, in a country not entirely unlike Italy, in one of those paper catalogues, I came across a top-notch workstation for a ridiculously low price - still an expensive computer for what was my budget. Even young, naive me thought it's too good to be true. And after some digging and enquiring I found that it was only the ridiculously expensive case for what could house a top-notch workstation.

[David Hicklin]

> only the ridiculously expensive case for what could house a top-notch workstation

And that is what you have to watch for on places like eBay where often they are selling peddling a picture of the item and make the description deliberately misleading

[Anonymous Coward]

Waste Paper

A simple tale about a common office supply where, as in the main tale, a seemingly good purchase offer was good only for the seller…

Many years ago (early 1980’s) we had an office-wide computer network based on RS232 serial links. Speeds were slow but, at that time, file sizes were low. In our office we each had a Dec Rainbow PC (mine was the top end version with a 10Mb HDD)! Most offices had access to shared printers - and most work would be printed out to pass on (memos, POs, technical instructions, etc); there was a rudimentary email system, but very rarely used (I only used it to send telexes).

In the UK, A4 is the standard paper size and our purchasing department had sourced a supplier of A4 width tractor fed paper (that is, the micro-perforations to tear off the tractor holed edges left an A4 wide sheet - 1/4” less than the USA-based standard width). This paper meant computer prints fitted in with office-wide binders, pockets, envelopes, etc. Just as importantly, it meant photocopies to A4 were straightforward. With US standard paper, the extra 1/4” width threw out margins and required photocopying to be done with the paper reversed (not rocket science but an extra complication); not to mention origami skills needed to fit into pockets, folders, etc.

Anyway, one day a manager decided to save his department money, having found a special deal on a bulk purchase of paper. I forget how many boxes he bought (in the hundreds - the office had around 3000 staff working there). Unfortunately, it was US-standard and, once this new stock entered use, the confidential waste bins were filling far faster as documents were printed and photocopied with missing margins. Any saving in the paper purchase was eaten up several times over by the extra cost - including IT having to reformat numerous templates and printer settings to try and minimise the waste. In the end, it would have been cheaper to ditch whole delivery and purchase the right sized paper, but that manager was one with wide influence and refused to admit he’d made a mistake.

The visible cost (the paper itself) was small in relation to the overall company costs but the disruption caused to daily work wasn’t.

[Aladdin Sane]

Re: Waste Paper

A4 is the standard pretty much everywhere except US and Canada. Because the yanks enjoy being bloody stupid awkward.

[Peter Gathercole]

Re: Waste Paper

I've told this tale before, but when I worked in the UK AIX Support Centre in the '90s, I once got hauled over the coals for how I handled a problem, only to have an apology, plus the problem fixed in 3 different ways.

The problem was that the AIX printer setup for the (then quite new) IBM 4019 laser printer did a sledge-hammer reset in a late part of the initialisation sequence of a print job, guaranteeing that the printer would throw a paper jam when loaded with A4 paper, even when correctly set for A4, because it was longer than US Letter. Everything was set up for A4, then the reset put it back to US Letter just before printing, and the printer then thought it has a paper jam when, after feeding 11" of paper, it still saw paper in one of the paper path sensors.

When the AIX L3 support/development person (in Austin, Texas) said "what do you expect, using non-standard paper sizes, I'm not going to fix this", I suggested that, in that case, AIX should be re-christened the "American Interactive eXutive" (actually in the Problem Management Report, which is why I got into trouble), which set him complaining up his management chain, and down mine. After being quizzed by the UK RS/6000 product manager about whether I was sure about what I had said (I was, and I demonstrated exactly why by changing the initialisation sequence in the database on one of our systems, a local fix I had already worked out and applied myself), I was told that I was actually a bit restrained in my response, and he pushed it back up in the other direction.

The problem was given to another specialist in Austin, and was fixed in the AIX driver database, the printer initialisation string, AND the printer firmware!

[DS999]

Re: Waste Paper

Yes clearly the US should have followed historical UK standards and we'd have gems like the Grand Eagle, Double Elephant and Small Foolscap paper sizes!

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Waste Paper

I had the reverse. Working at a major multinational pharmaceutical company, one of our systems insisted on printing for A4 paper. Being in the US, A4 simply wasn't available. UK-based IT wanted to know if we could simply use A4 instead of our standard letter size when printing from that system... sure, if you'll ship us a couple pallets from the UK every month!

After months of asking, they finally consented to adjusting the page margins so the top and bottom of the pages stopped getting cut off.

[just4this]

Shocking…

At time of posting the word ‘standard’ has been used 7 times.

And yet no XKCD link has been summoned.

[Jou (Mxyzptlk)]

Re: Shocking…

Wait until you read it 14 times.

[Aladdin Sane]

Re: Shocking…

Do you work in manglement? Instead of whining you could've just posted the link.

[just4this]

Re: Shocking…

It was easier to get you to do it.

[Aladdin Sane]

Re: Shocking…

That's management material right there.

[ChrisC]

Re: Shocking…

"Delegation, delegation, delegation, that's what you need

If you wanna lead the team

If management's your dream

Oh oh delegations what you need..."

With heartfelt apologies to the late great Roy Castle, and all those who have happy childhood memories of hearing the original at the end of Record Breakers

[Anonymous Coward]

As a Mordac (infosec) in a large local authority we would regularly have services (usually education) which would appear with new bits of shiny they'd bought without consulting with IT; demanding it be plugged in. IT not wanting to be a bad guys would point these happy purchasers to me. I would trot out the standard phrase, "I hope you've kept the receipt" and dismiss these idiots to whence they'd come*.

*The exception being the guys who worked in a school providing special education needs, we'd generally bend over backwards for them as their IT requirements were always bespoke and unpredictable depending on the needs of the little people they were working with.

[J.G.Harston]

whence not to whence, whence *MEANS* to. "to whence" means "to to where".

[KarMann]

Actually, rather the opposite. 'Whence' means 'from where' or 'from which'; 'whither' means 'to where' or 'to which'. So, OP's 'dismiss these idiots to whence they'd come' parses roughly as 'dismiss these idiots to where they'd come from,' or 'to from where they'd come' if you want to be that way about it. Pretty legit.

As an aside, the usual confusion I see is people getting unwittingly reduplicative with it, saying 'from whence they came' as though it just meant 'from where they came', or simply 'whence they came'.

[The Oncoming Scorn]

"Okay. Well, for starters, I’ll have who, what, when, and where. And then whither, whether, whence, and wherefore to follow, and one big side order of why?"

[Terry 6]

More to the point, surely, these are definitely obsolete terms. So why use them at all?

[Anonymous Coward]

To get them back into daily usage. Words can be de-obsoleted.

[Terry 6]

True, but as a good rule of thumb over the centuries language has evolved with usage and if a word or phrase really is needed it'll survive- even if not with its original meaning.

(e.g "begging the question", Which I know annoys some on here, but the reality is it does good work the way it's commonly used now)

[CrazyOldCatMan]

More to the point, surely, these are definitely obsolete terms. So why use them at all?

Wither is the fun in that? We should know whence our language comes!

[Terry 6]

Shouldn't that be "....cometh" then?

[MachDiamond]

"Shouldn't that be "....cometh" then?"

Hey, kids might be reading this!

[MachDiamond]

"More to the point, surely, these are definitely obsolete terms. So why use them at all?"

bc is literally more better to use different words, duh.

[Terry 6]

I can only judge that by my own (one time) Local Authority school system. It was decades into the computer age before the LA accepted any kind of responsibility for supporting Schools' IT

That's decades of schools winging it.

Followed by a service being provided that turned up with all sorts of procedures and costs that the schools didn't understand. And had never needed previously.

[Martin an gof]

But in our area, the Local Authority did insist that you purchased everything via them, even if they didn't support it.

My mother was the head of an honest-to-goodness Local Authority Nursery School, in the days when these things were actually schools in their own right.

She was always looking for ways to improve the children's experiences so as well as lumps of wood, four inch nails and one pound hammers, kit she'd been letting her children use (supervised, of course!) since the 1950s, in the 1980s the school eventually took delivery of a computer. A BBC Master, no less (they hadn't been allowed to buy a BBC Micro when it came out, despite the PTA fund raising for it). So this BBC Micro was equipped with a 5¼" floppy disc, a colour monitor and a Concept Keyboard - basically a big touch pad on to which you could place A3 sheets for various activities. Wrote some software for it myself, good fun.

Anyway, the PTA was looking for their next project and mum decided it'd be great if the children could print out the drawings they had made (or the final screens of whatever software they were using) and they raised the money for a colour dot matrix printer.

The local authority refused to let them buy one because, something to do with, children don't need it.

This time, however, my mother was somewhat forceful and the LA relented and they ended up with something which had a four-colour ribbon and took hours to print, but at least that printout was in colour even if it didn't quite match the saturated shades on the Microvitec CUB.

A few years later they took delivery of an A3020 with a user port / hard drive podule so that they could continue to use the Concept Keyboard. I think it was about that time they also swapped to a colour inkjet/bubblejet.

M.

[agurney]

Concept keyboards were brilliant - I did a post-graduate computer education course and my final project used BBC micro + speech processor + concept keyboard + Epson dot matrix printer for special needs youngsters running their own little shop. Press a few symbols and Kenneth Kendall would audibly confirm the order of a "baked potato with coleslaw, coffee and scone", or whatever, and print out the appropriate till receipt. The project addressed a range of problems around communication, language, money handling and so on, and the kit could be reused for other purposes by simply swapping keyboard overlays.

- This was in the early 1980s .. long before Apple's reconfigurable keyboard patent claims caused grief for the special needs software sector.

- Lilybank School, Port Glasgow, in association with TVEI Inverclyde

[Anonymous Coward]

> long before Apple's reconfigurable keyboard patent claims

Ah, yes, the patent application that was fairly described as "similar to the widely-publicized (but not yet shipping) Optimus keyboard because of course Apple can, a decade later, be granted a US patent that "is significant because it’s been filed for a mechanical keyboard" (after all, Lebedev didn't manage to make his prototype into a full viable product, so it was a - vapour keyboard?)

[J.G.Harston]

WTH had he applied for, been accepted for, and entered a tech job if he aspired to do management. I simply do not understand this "I'll enter non-management in order to become a manager" thing.

"I aspire to be a Chief Constable, I know, I'll start by getting a food delivery job. I deliver food TO THE POLICE STATION!!!!!! that's clearly the right route."

[just4this]

The route to chief Constable depends more on what lodge you belong to rather than starting position.

[Terry 6]

You'd be amazed then at the people who enter teaching with a clear plan to rapid headship.Can't get away from the kids quick enough. Usually shit teachers, too.

But great at spotting then next best bandwagon and jumping on to it, then off again before it flops.

[Anonymous Coward]

No More NPRINTER

Back in the 1990s, we used HP JetDirects and Castelle LANpresses (the latter had RS-232C connections, as well as a parallel port) to network our org's printers.

We also offerred a lower-cost solution: use of Novell's NPRINTER software. For this, the printer was attached to a workstation as with a local printer, via parallel or serial cable, and the network communicated wirh it over the PC's NIC, via a terminate-and-stay-resident piece of software (NPRINTER.EXE) which was loaded via AUTOEXEC.BAT.

We had years of stupid printer troubleshooting calls of, "The printer is not printing!" caused by people turning off the NPRINTER PC at the end of their shift, in a 24/7 org, despite any large posted signs reading, "DO NOT POWER OFF PC OR PRINTER."

Some times the problem was due to people disconnecting and physically-moving a PC without IT involvement or knowledge.

IT management finally put their foot down and decreed, "No more NPRINTERs. No more NPRINTER support. If you want a printer networked, you need to put up the money for an HP JetDirect (card or box), or a Castelle LANpress* and the printer must work with one of those."

Some managers which ignored IT's advice/directives and "saved money" by purchasing incompatible printers, and ended up sad.

In later years, WinPrinters became a thing. Cue more sad managers.

*Macintosh networking and printer-sharing was a whole other tangled skein, but it worked for us.

[gryphon]

Re: No More NPRINTER

"In later years, WinPrinters became a thing. Cue more sad managers."

Oh, those piles of crap.

Vastly dumbed down print engine which slowed the attached very limited CPU and RAM PC down to a slow crawl while it tried to create the whole image to feed to the printer rather than just sending PCL or PostScript as nature intended?

Those piles of crap.

Don't think you could even use a separate PC as the print server for one.

'Sadly' I remember using both the JetDirects and the LANpresses, sure there was another equivalent as well. Netgear perhaps quite late on.

The onboard JetDirects were fabulous, expensive of course, the separate ones with the multiple printer ports were ok but a bit of a faff.

Don't think I used NPRINTER but might have done. Do remember doing scripts for Netware printer picking but can't remember the details.

[Korev]

Re: No More NPRINTER

And WinModems too...

[Martin an gof]

Re: No More NPRINTER

Computer Concepts did it right with their Laser Direct products. In concept, similar to a Winprinter (remove the intelligence to the host computer) but in practice so, so much better.

The only downside was the price. The theory with a Winprinter was that dumbing it down to essentially just the mechanism (something Amstrad had pioneered with the PCW range) would save on the purchase price. With the LaserDirect you not only had to buy an otherwise perfectly normal printer, it only worked with one of three models of laser printer and needed a special interface card for the connection which used what Canon referred to as the "video interface". I think my setup cost about the same (~£1,200) as the A310 (later RiscPC) I attached it to!

M.

[Doctor Syntax]

Re: No More NPRINTER

"The onboard JetDirects were fabulous, expensive of course, the separate ones with the multiple printer ports were ok but a bit of a faff."

I have one of those separate ones but only one Laserjet of similar vintage attached to it. I reckon the HP badge on the printer is more soundly engineered than a modern HP printer.

They just work.

[David Hicklin]

Re: No More NPRINTER

I loved using NPRINTER , indeed I loved the Novell Networking in general...oh those were the days...

[bernmeister]

Stuff happens

I am sure that most contributors here have at least one relevant tale to tell. I cant bring anything major to mind but my most vivid memories are of buying an A5 printer from a TV sales channel. This printer was a little special because it did not need ink, the colour was built into the special paper it used. The price was reasonable so I bought one. It came with ten sheets of special paper. Not enough for a print run so I tried to order more following the instructions with the pack. It was an email address for ordering, no response. The damned printer has sat in a cupboard for a long time now, unused.

[Pete Sdev]

Re: Stuff happens

This printer was a little special because it did not need ink

Speccy thermal printer was "special" too.

http://www.commodore.gen.tr/forum/index.php?action=dlattach;topic=10127.0;attach=10690

Though you could, for a price, buy paper for it it at the time.

[Doctor Syntax]

Re: Stuff happens

But that was the special security paper. After a few days/hour/minutes depending on the environment and probably age of papernobody would be able to get your top secret information by bin-diving.

[that one in the corner]

Re: Stuff happens

The ZX printer didn't use thermal ink paper, the stuff that softly and silently vanishes away, giving your printouts the lasting power of morning dew.

Instead, it burnt away a silvery metallic layer using the power of harnessed lightning (i.e. a teeny little spark).

Which meant that its rolls of paper really were special, no nicking till rolls from up to date swanky establishments that had given up the ink pad.

But you could zap it and render it unreadable for the bin divers (you remember that fad for putting AOL CDs into the microwave and watching the metal film burn up, leaving pretty patterns behind? Well...)

[Anonymous John]

An office I worked in about 60 years ago, placed a stationery order for 500 packs of staples (each containing 1000 staples}. At least that was the intention. But the packs came in boxes of 500 packs.

You know where this is going, don't you?

[jn5250]

Even with stapels, this sounds like requiring a forklift...

[Anonymous John]

We're goanna need a larger storeroom.

[Anonymous Coward]

And Klaus.

[KarMann]

You know where this is going, don't you?

Universal Paperclips?

[Gavsky]

... Excellent work! The company (or, successors) are still using the stock, to this day?...

[Sparkus]

Where do I begin....

If only being honest and objective and public about former bosses work skills didn't put one at risk of "slander" lawsuits (justified or not).............

[[kidding / not kidding]]

[steelpillow]

Value packs it in

In buying, the classic is to find that though you only want say two dozen, when you order that cheap per-item offer they turn out to be available only in packs of 1,000. Anybody want 23,978 M3 screws to special-to-order length, or a similar number of unusual-valued resistors? I expect they're still in the stock room. So glad I wasn't buying elephants for the local zoo.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Value packs it in

> or a similar number of unusual-valued resistors

Was it you who left the boxfulls of weirdly low-value 1/8 W and 1/4 W through-hole resistors at EMF Camp a couple of years ago? All the 10k or 330 or 4k7 ohms had gone already, when an arty sort commented that she could "make something that looked interesting out of all those", but didn't want to waste useful components - and promptly found her arms full of bandoliers, no, hang on, there are still whole closed boxes of the things; do you have a bag?

[steelpillow]

Re: Value packs it in

Nah, a small trading estate in Cheshire, ca. 1983. Probably grading the hardcore under a carpark by now.

[RMclan]

How many????

When I was an apprentice at BAe back in the 80s, I spent a little while in the buying office. The section I was in handled the odds and sods.

BAe had a suggestion scheme where people could make suggestions and if they saved the company money they got about 20-50% of the savings as a reward.

Between body panels, aircraft manufacturers use an electrolytic sealant made by Thiokol, it is a brown gunk not dissimilar to Marmite. The assembly line workers would grab offcuts of aluminium, bits of cardboard, etc to apply this stuff. A suggestion came through that it would save time and mess if they had wood spatulas to apply it with, not too dissimilar to the old doctors tongue depressors.

I was given the job to get a price for these. I couldn't find a manufacturer of tongue depressors, so I contacted Walls to find out where they got their lolly sticks.

Walls put me in touch with a wood products company in Canada. So one evening I stayed late and phoned them. I explained what we were looking for, and gave them dimensions for 3 different sizes.

They asked how many I was after. I explained we were initially looking for about 50K of the middle size and 20k of each of the large and small sizes.

The guy at the other end of the phone politely informed me they couldn't help me as their minimum production order for non-standard sizes was 10 million units as the is roughly how many lolly sticks they get out of 1 large tree.

The suggestion was turned down as impractical.

[jn5250]

Re: How many????

I do not really understand. Did the Canadian company make standard spatulas?

If the line workers used makeshift items, at least one of the required dimensions should be available.

Chinese bamboo cutlery would be my next guess. Suppose they come in less that 10 mill quantities.

[RMclan]

Re: How many????

"I do not really understand. Did the Canadian company make standard spatulas?"

They didn't make anything close to the sizes we wanted. Also, they suggested pine might be better for what we wanted rather than the birch they used to make the lolly sticks as it softer and more flexible. They didn't make anything like what we were after from pine.

[Gavsky]

Re: How many????

Oh, if only you'd said, "Okay, 10 million it is"! They'd still be using the stock today, calling them 'RMclan Spreaders'...but nobody remembers why.

[MachDiamond]

Re: How many????

"Oh, if only you'd said, "Okay, 10 million it is"! They'd still be using the stock today"

Shipping might cost a few bob and then there's storage, but if those 10 mil were £257.50, would that be a bad deal?

[MachDiamond]

Re: How many????

"The suggestion was turned down as impractical."

Still need some?

I don't know how many I have, but it's very close to a S-ton. Crafts stores have them and lolly sticks are easy to find in other places. I grab them at estate sales and should probably stop at this point. It was a bugger to go cold turkey on light bulbs, but I've run out of space where I store bulbs. The only light bulbs I allow myself are specialty sizes for older desk lamps, appliances, etc. I've given away loads of CFL's. I keep the tungsten bulbs for the warm color.

[Huw L-D]

Been there.

Mid 90s. Got sent to another office to set up their PCs. Turn up, got faced with a load of Electronic Typewriters. The Managing Director said he'd bought them at an auction and to get on with the work. I had to explain to him that I couldn't install the software, never mind fit the ISA Token Ring cards.

Got told to try.

[Doctor Syntax]

Re: Been there.

You could try sending them to auction to salvage at least some of the cost. Then the MD comes back shouting "Guess what? I goat another lot cheap."

[CrazyOldCatMan]

Re: Been there.

Then the MD comes back shouting "Guess what? I goat another lot cheap."

Baah!

I would hoof it out of there rather than butting heads.

[steelpillow]

Re: Been there.

You shoulda got some Thiokol sealant from the local hardware store, a packet of tongue depressors from the nearest Boots, and just got on with it! Then blamed the failure to return a ping on the network cable characteristic impedance, sought a vast price for replacing it, then claimed next day - from afar - to have done so.

[The Oncoming Scorn]

Rich Pickings!

Ohhh over the years I've salvaged things from tickets that came in to remove the now "Off Books" manglement ill advised purchases, that were buried in a attic\storeroom\closet - No Asset Tag no tracking, they never existed.

Those tickets were my favorites. along with inserting myself into the e-waste disposal routes at any number of places of employment

Still pissed about having to pass up one of half a dozen New Sealed BBC Master 128's in 2008 as I was moving to Canada.

[Gavsky]

Like 'bought a doll's house sofa thinking it was full-size' - these stories are endlessly entertaining. Apart from out & out scams, most are caused by poor design, lack of clear descriptions, or bad communication between 'the people wot take product photos' & 'the people wot writ about them' (sic).

Sometimes, it'll be "It's too late! The proofs have gone to the printer! Customer services will explain to customers"...

[Commander Davy]

Boxes vs Pallets

My ship was due to pull into Olongopo, PI. Knowing the reputation of the place, the corpsman ordered two boxes of condoms to distribute to the crew. But there was some confusion over the unit of issue, and when the ship pulled in, waiting for it on the pier were two PALLETS of condoms. Of course, word of this leaked into the community, with predictable results.

[CrazyOldCatMan]

Re: Boxes vs Pallets

waiting for it on the pier were two PALLETS of condoms

Were they extra-large ones in boxes labelled "small"?

*Cough* Allegedly. That Churchill was a rum old cove.

[Lee D]

I work in a school.

One of the drama teachers was hosting a production and wanted to order a toy sheep to be a prop for the shepherds.

They saw an blow-up toy sheep on Amazon.

Yep, you guessed it.

I categorically deny ever having anything to do with her login having a Shaun the Sheep desktop wallpaper for the next three years.....

[ecofeco]

Quite a few things actually

I've worked on several decommission/upgrade projects at a very large scale. The amount of years old forgotten things has been quite beneficial to me.

It was rough work with much crawling around and physical labor, but the treasure finds were worth it.

[ChrisBedford]

So what's changed...

Sounds like ordering off Temu

[CrazyOldCatMan]

Re: So what's changed...

Sounds like ordering off Temu

But without the slavery and abuse of captive populations.

[Alan Brown]

Many years ago, someone long preceeding me ordered 50 power cords - and ordered 50 BOXES of 100 cords.

The same person had apparently made a bunch of similar errors and this time they couldn't be sent back. 15 years later after giving away several boxes to other departments we were still ploughing through them. Thankfully IEC320 is a long-lived standard and I think that if the department hadn't been disbanded 25 years ago they'd still be there.

[David McQueen]

19K Baud - nope

I am slightly surprised that there are no old timers in here that would not flag that BAUD, generally, capped out at 3,200 for the standard phone system. This gave you up to 28,800 bps with the V.34 standard. So, in fact, their dial up was 19K bps or 19,200 to be exact if I remember correctly.

2,400 BAUD was the most compatible at the V.32bis standard, which is why most, if not all, fax machines stopped at 14,400bps.