spoon-fed by media nonsense designed to make them hate Elon Musk and EVERY technology
It's true. I've been so brainwashed by the media I now hate EVERY technology, even spoons.
Since Elon Musk vigorously threw up a gesture once thought reprehensible at a Trump rally on the day of the president's inauguration, owning a Tesla has taken on a whole new meaning for some. And it's owners of the Cybertruck – Tesla's most conspicuous and dorky model – who are bearing the brunt. At this point, we must doff …
Spoons are evil! Alan Rickman's Sheriff of Nottingham even tore someone's heart out with one. Truly spoons are dictator death implements.
That's why I always eat with my fingers.
They call me soup-hand Luke.
The irony is... that ole Muskrat and his Musketards made me hate them... simply by the words and actions that they themselves did.
If you're at a dinner table with 10 other people, and Musk is invited to sit at the table... and no one speaks out... You now have 11 nazi's eating dinner... Same goes for buying anything produced by a nazi.
Nazi's can fuck off
Nazi's can fuck off
Users "nearly daily" post images and videos capturing notes left saying things like "WHAT'S ELON'S §$% TASTE LIKE?" or "NAZI CAR," people kicking the vehicles or throwing slices of cheese at them, which is a novel form of peaceful protest we can get behind.
Sounds a lot like El Reg then? Oh how far the Vultures have fallen..
Ah yes. But you haven't seen our block-chain enabled, AI capable spoonmwith regular OTA updates. We'll be rolling it out to a few select customers in a few weeks. To order one, just send an email with full financial details to elon@scamster.ng.
It's 2040, you are currently dying from dehydration because the compulsory musketard neurailink chip in your brain has blocked all hydration due tot he expiry of your nestle water+ subscription service.
When they try to sell or trade theirs in and find out it has far less residual value than they assumed it would.
Until a few years ago Teslas had some of the highest resale values around, that has completely turned around since between Musk being forced to cut prices again and again trying to make up for sagging demand and the reputation of the brand being in the shitter as he's finally taken off his mask. That's something the "I bought this car before I knew he was a nazi" types are already reporting when trying to unload theirs, and it sure isn't going to get any better as more and more of them end up on the used market with fewer and fewer willing buyers.
I suppose the only thing the Cybertruck cucks have going for them is that Tesla has reportedly cut back production - they are producing fewer of them than they were only a few months ago. And they were producing less than 5000 a month at the peak. So maybe "scarcity" will make it a collector's item someday for fans of odd looking vehicles. Like DeLoreans (pre BTTF fame) and Pontiac Aztecs and so forth.
I am surprised that someone has not invented an Bluetooth knife, fork or spoon yet complete with cloud subscription that causes it to stop working if connection is lost.
They can then communicate with the dishwasher to start washing the moment the door is closed.
And then re-order the dishwasher cleaning tabs...
Stop! I must stop....need a lie down.......
Watch out - the patent trolls will be after you. There's probably one somewhere that's bought HAPIfork's IP....
https://slate.com/technology/2017/10/why-should-you-buy-a-bluetooth-enabled-smart-fork.html
It's called "the consequences of your actions"
And His Muskness will promptly sue all you maggots because you are supposed to buy his bullshit, ahem, swasticars, damn, try again, monthly recall vehicles.
His Muskness has been letting some ranting slip through, saying:
You will be buying my cars, whether you like it or not. Boycotting me is not an option. I will have your money, one way or another.
No further comments could be extracted, but laughter and shaking heads were plenty.
<......".......the ultimate in vehicle style and engineering?"......>
If someone wants the ultimate in vehicle style and engineering, the Cybertruck wouldn't even be considered for the shortlist.
It's pug-ugly and judging from the number of safety recalls that have been issued, it is an engineering disaster.
Google was good enough to quote an excerpt or two from Facebook posts about this subject, and the answer appears to be - yes!?
"fling the cheese from his Big Mac onto my truck. Glad it landed on the glass because it was there almost an hour before I got out of my flick and found it. Could have done some greasy damage to the trim or the tonneau"
Tonneau? Isn't that just the fancy name for loading bed of the truck? Which can be damaged by greasy cheese? Yikes.
Although there is a strange specificity to the protest: "CT was parked outside my daughter's home during a party and when I left there was a slice of American cheese stuck to the side of the truck.". American cheese? Ok, so that - stuff - will act like one of those vinyl wraps and adhere to the smmoth surface, but wouldn't a decent blue cheese have a more appropriate aroma?
I once threw a slice of cheese to the dog. He failed to catch it, unusually, and it landed perfectly on the top of his snout folded over and stuck. Poor bugger was absolutely frantic. He could see it, he could smell it, but it wouldn't come off and his tongue wouldn't reach to devour it's yummy deliciousness!
Labradors being famed for their vast intelligence, he immediately ran straight at the kitchen table trying to knock the cheese off with the legs and then running under the chairs to scrape it off on the undersides. Took me a minute to calm him down and hand him the cheese - excitement over.
I can only assume that Labradors were off chasing tennis balls when God was handing out the brains.
The Malamute, with his whole two brain cells (one for breathing and a spare) tends to go for the catch with a noticeable lag and much enthusiasm which has landed said cheese on the top of the fridge/cupboards/child on numerous occasions
My wife once vigorously shook a bottle of tomato ketchup *after* she'd loosened the top. The dog went totally mental trying to lick it off his own head (and everywhere else) and it took ages to clean up. Both the kitchen and the dog. She wanted to keep this amazing lapse of judgement from me, but she doesn't like going up ladders and the ketchup that reached the ceiling was a dead giveaway LOL
They got the very last of the brains, just after the ginger cats.
There is a theory that there is only one labrador braincell and that they all have to share it in a fashion similar to the single electron shared by the whole universe as mooted by Pauli (Man, I want some of what Pauli was smoking that day).
They got the very last of the brains, just after the ginger cats
I'll have you know our ginger cat is very bright. He can eat *and* purr at the same time!
(Also, he says his tortie sister went to the brains handout twice. He can't remember whether she gave him any but she must have done.)
Tonneau? Isn't that just the fancy name for loading bed of the truck?``
No it's the cover for the truck bed, most trucks have them I believe as optional extra's (Oher vehicles Unibody Trucks\SUV's have them as standard - Not sure about the SwastiKKKar).
The Lady has them as a three part locking covers each rated for about 200 - 300 pounds.
https://da8h1v3w8q6n5.cloudfront.net/aa82/inventory/230491/R01599960_1.jpg
> No it's the cover for the truck bed, most trucks have them I believe as optional extra's
Well, in the face of that, I just had to check again[1] (my French not being what it was); the word has moved across into English (and appears to be the basis for "tun" as well, much more important - see icon).
The bastion of modern knowledge, Wikipedia gives the 'ole at the back as "tonneau" and the tarp flung over the top as the "tonneau cover", which matches what these off-roaders and some detailing enthusiasts[2] are talking about. If we go into third definition territory then it is finally being used to refer to the cover.
Ok, we'll go with the third definition and accept that "usage changes" and all that. But that still leaves us with the Cybertruck owner worried that cheese will ruin his fancy replacement for a tarpaulin, which isn't any great improvement!
> The Lady ... https://da8h1v3w8q6n5.cloudfront.net/aa82/inventory/230491/R01599960_1.jpg
I am sure that your Lady looks gorgeous, but sadly that link gives the poignant message:
>> The Amazon CloudFront distribution is configured to block access from your country
[1] what, me, twiddling my thumbs waiting for The Machine to finish yet another build? Pshaw.
[2] so *that's* what "detailing a car" means! Have heard it a few times but hadn't twigged it just meant a good scrub; well, you live and learn.
"so *that's* what "detailing a car" means! Have heard it a few times but hadn't twigged it just meant a good scrub; well, you live and learn."
I think I first heard the term in Back To The Future when Marty comes home and Dad is a successful author and Biff is the flunky "detailing" the trucks on the driveway. Seemed an odd word at the time. But they we might have our cars "valetted", which in the US would more likely mean paying someone to park it for you, not have it cleaned inside and out as in the UK. Language is weird, other national variations of a language you speak, doubly so. Ask a Frenchman about Quebecois French, or a Spaniard about a Mexican Spanish :-)
When you see a cybertruck, that's not time for a trip to the cheese shop to select the perfect tribute. You use whatever dairy product you have on hand. If you have "American cheese" (whatever the hell that even means) easily available, then that's what you slap on it.
Besides, why would you want to waste good Brie or Stilton that way?
Although, saying that - beauty really is in the eye of the beholder.
Some people bought these things Link to an Autoexpress article
There's a bit of recency bias here. The Chrysler PT Cruiser and Fiat Multipla were here as I'd expected. No Allegro though. Or Montego. And I quite like the Pontiac Aztek - having never seen one before. Though it's in the realms of quirkily interesting, rather than actually good. Until you see one from another angle.
Some people love the angular look. Some people seem to genuinely like brutalist architecture. I guess there's no accounting for taste.
> The Fiat Multipla is gorgeous.
Well, yes, for a given value of "gorgeous".
Choosing a Fiat Multipla, of the 21st century variety, simply meant either "I don't have a penis", or "it didn't influence me."
The original 1950s variety is, not exactly gorgeous, but certainly interesting.
-A.
from my youth the rambler american. today lexus cars are pretty ugly. cybertruck pretty weird looking, but most pickup and pickup like trucks buyers don't seem to really need them and the ones i've seen aren't very good drivers especially if there's snow on the ground. they seem to think that more power is the solution to every driving problem, and in snow that is not a solution. been hit by two pickup trucks and if they'd been just a bit more careful wouldn't have happened.
Some people bought these things
Ew.
Mind you, I was one of the very few that bought a (2nd) hand Citroen XM. *HUGE* slab of metal, great technology, French build quality..
It (fairly rapidly) became 3rd-hand after the hydropneumatics failed for one too many times (the power steering, brake enhancement *and* the fancy self-levelling suspension all shared the same system. So, if anything went wrong with it (it did, repeatedly) you'd be trying to safely stop a tonne of car with no brakes, very, very heavy steering and no suspension. All I can say is that it was useful that the parking brake was cable-linked)
" Secondly, has he never tried to use a toilet in the pitch black so as not to disturb a loved one? Or does this guy just let it rip and expect someone else to clean up?"
Either he's never had sex (highly likely) and tried to pee afterwards or he's a typical Elmo fanboi and expects everyone else to clean up his mess (also highly likely)
Or both, the second explains the first.
This post has been deleted by its author
I used to rave about Tesla, about how visionary Elon Musk was, how amazing SpaceX was. When the Thailand cave rescue incident occurred. Knowing nothing about cave diving I saw the early offers and prototype and was very impressed that this group of engineers would put time and effort into figuring out a solution to safely get those kids out. When he was told it wouldn't work (and also being told to stick it where the sun didn't shine), I initially defended his outburst, though as it carried on, I had a major loss in respect for him.
Since 2018 the guy has gone massively downhill, just one crazy thing after another, lies upon lies and more lies (standard Trump behaviour) and it feels like he now has gone full on evil mode.
It's sad really, as with that amount of money and influence, why care about screwing others over? He could have focused on making the best possible products and used it massive wealth to make the world a better place.
>, I initially defended his outburst, though as it carried on, I had a major loss in respect for him.
Yeah that's the problem. People didn't reckon with the fact that someone with that temperment isn't going to be benevolent and is only in it for PR. People who want to help don't fling murder or child molestation accusations at the drop of a hat, it's like answering "yellow" to "what's 1+1" to them. I'm not sure how to trick people into "trust but verify"ing the public figures they idealize.
It's a few years back, but Elon did ask how much it would cost to solve world hunger.
People who care about these things made a decent plan, ballpark price 6 billion.
Rightho says Elon, "donates" 6 billion in stock to his charity (tax benefit, but still has stock under his control) and says he'll solve it.
Charity sits there, donating the minimum each year to maintain it's charitable status, sitting on the stock.
Elon gets appointed to Lord of Breaking Things in the Most Expensive Way Possible, decides to make world hunger worse instead.
The spectacle of one of the worlds richest men taking money away from the poorest people in order to pay to for tax breaks is obscene.
"He could have focused on making the best possible products and used it massive wealth to make the world a better place."
Lying and graft are a faster way to wealth.
Marc and Martin had a path planned out for Tesla that included a lot more than Elon has implemented. Although, the more detailed plans are the point where Tesla is sat now so without quality new ideas and an updated map of where to go, Elon is at a loss and perhaps that's why he doesn't spend much time at Tesla. When he does...... a pink slip for you, and you, and your entire department.....
The sad thing isn't so much how far Musk has fallen, but the way it affects our perceptions of the companies (and all of their hard working employees) he's now associated with.
Your opening line sums this up perfectly - you *used* to rave about how amazing SpaceX *was* - and whether or not you intended this to indicate that you no longer do, others definitely will now be less inclined to talk positively about Musk-associated companies, yet the companies themselves haven't changed, so we should be raving about how amazing they *still are*...
SpaceX has gotten worse over time. Starlink makes astronomy (and low-earth satellite orbits) worse. Starship still blows up regularly, and damaged it's own launch pad severely enough to require a redesign of the entire pad area after the first launch. Amazing is in the eye of the beholder.
I gave my first ever full-blooded "from the bottom of my heart" salute to a passing Tesla at the weekend. It really couldn't have been misinterpreted as anything else but the driver looked mortified.
Can't think why.
I have to say, while like the writer I'm not a car guy, this statement is pretty inaccurate.
And I can't imagine many of us would laugh off harmless abuse like having our car cheesed, any more than we'd appreciate rubbish being thrown into our gardens by chavvy kids.
"He could have focused on making the best possible products and used it massive wealth to make the world a better place."
That's where I get stuck. I don't see much utility in the CT to make the cost and ugliness worth it. Like any other electric truck, it can't tow a heavy load very far. The shape of the bed means it needs to be loaded only from the end since only basketball players can reach over the side of the thing. It's massive which makes parking a problem. It's built on a cast Aluminum uni-body rather than a ladder frame. It's hard to see out of both to the rear and in the front with those giant A pillars. A 4' wiper blade? REally? Sharp edges. A Chop-0-Matic bonnet. The list goes on and on so the only reason a person might buy one is purely a "look at me" desire. Well, they've got that and people are assigning shortcomings to somebody that would spend a $100,000 for something like a CT to get noticed. I expect I could pick up a nicely restored E-type Jag for less than that and not be subjected to taunts from the gallery. For the money, I could possible get two and have one cleanly converted to electric. Stop me, I'm getting a chubby.
I'm not particular about what I drive, as long as it's reliable, reasonably comfortable (so air conditioning and radio are required), and safe. So: Dodge Stratus, Mercedes 300E, Nissan Sentra, Chevelle Malibu station wagon, Dodge Grand Caravan, Mercury Sable are all cars I've routinely driven. (A couple of which were in unusual colors, but my current one is a comfortable gray.)
But no, I wouldn't laugh off people throwing things at or putting things on my car. I'm not particular about the appearance of the car, but I'd be right concerned about the attitude of the perp, and potential escalation - like next time rather than throwing cheese, it might be a rock.
I do know quite a lot of people who when asked what car they have will give answers like
"Red one" and no idea of make or model, just red.
"A Ford", to which the follow up question of "what model" may have been me asking for the square root of 498 judging by the look on their face.
The SO is pretty good when we are looking at cars for one of us. Right now I can be told about most small SUV's from any angle, any make model - as this is what is being purchased soon. Crap on any other type of car though
may have been me asking for the square root of 498 judging by the look on their face.
Not square roots, that would make the blower sound funny. 498ci would make the car sound good. One thing that Tesla fabois and anti-fanbois have though is the whining.
The SO is pretty good when we are looking at cars for one of us
[Gloom mode = on]
Mine is stuck in the car-price era of 30 years ago [1]. Everything I look at is *far* too expensive..
[1] She drives a Morris Minor. Price-adjusted, what we paid for it 30 years ago would buy quite a nice car nowadays, especially if you factor in all the replacement bodywork & parts it's eaten over the years.
Depending on personal hygiene (Primarily lack thereof) it could be a Cheese Wizz, that would explain the thick muck that's sold in jars in North America.
Especially with regard to our former friends Due South.
"Canadian cheese whiz lists cheese as the second ingredient after milk. American cheese whiz does not list any cheese on the label".
The real aim of the Cybertruck is to extract some $400M from the US tax payer by selling these disasters to government. And with Trump cronies in place, nobody is going to stop yet another handout to Musk.
That's also what drove the whole bulletproof myth (just takes a bigger caliber)..
Here in AU most Tesla car owners that aren't complete drop kicks or displaced septics, are so dismayed if not disgusted by Space Karen's recent antics that they regret their choice of EV marque.
Many now sport stickers of the ilk: Sorry! I Bought This Before I Knew Musk was a NAZI.
I am wondering whether there is an aftermarket for Twatzika logo removal and replacement.
While the symbol is supposedly a stylized segment of an electric motor it is also not unlike a thumbtack or a prick without any balls.
I would be offering the deceased twitter bluebird as one replacement emblem option in a choice of colours of course but I expect the stylized facepalm will be a more popular selection.
"Wasn't being forced to buy Twitter at a ridiculous price something of a consequence?"
Well, he promised to buy it, signed a contract and then wanted to back out after violating the non-disparagement terms of the contract from day one impacting the value of the company as many employees immediately started jumping ship before the rush which also damaged the company. If he had buyer's remorse and paid the $1bn bail-out clause and not bad-mouthed Twitter, he could have "gracefully" nullified the contract. As if Elon could do anything gracefully.
I remember reading Andrew Tobias talking about wasting money, and saying that the thing most people were likely to waste money was on a car purchase. I could waste money on a cybertruck, but why? if i were driving a fiesta it would get me there, and my first car was an escort, probably less expensive. all i needed. good mileage for the time. Today, for the price of a cybertruck i could pay for all the gas i'll need in my lifetime and all the service i'll need for my car and still have money left over to replace it in 10 years. Sorry, don't get it. got nothing against cybertrucks, they are weird looking but if you want to drive one be my guest. just think the expense is sketchy.
"just think the expense is sketchy."
Cars are still, after over 100 years, a status symbol. It's like buying a Rolex watch. An old Timex can be just as accurate and have a similar look. It means that many people buy a car to show off their wealth, try to get others to believe they have money or think having a fancy car is going to get them laid (which it might, once or twice).
My car really needs a new splash of paint, but it gets me where I need to go perfectly fine. That's good enough. I trade on tying to be a good person over being flashy and people feigning to like me with the hopes I'll give them money/stuff.
Dear Sir,
As a Fiesta driver I object to your comment about it's reliability. Thanks to Ford's ideas involving belts and their placement within the oil sump I live in fear of the day when said wet belt will disintegrate, catastrophically destroying the engine and probably flipping the car at the same time as the engine seizes solid.
Yours etc,
Brigadier Arthur Mandrake Throatwarbler Mangrove kerplunk kerplunk whoops where's my thribble two jags Arthur Jackson (Mrs)
The wet cambelt is indeed the most extreme example of planned obsolescence ever foisted on an unsuspecting public by a motor manufacturer.
I should point out two things:
1. You don't need to wait for the belt to snap before the engine gets destroyed, the build up of fragments shed by the cambelt as the oil attacks it clogs the oil pickup well before the belt fails & the engine then dies of oil starvation.
2. Ford claim that this doesn't happen if you use their wet belt-specific engine oil. Presumably Peugeot et al make similar claims.
"2. Ford claim that this doesn't happen if you use their wet belt-specific engine oil. Presumably Peugeot et al make similar claims."
That's how you cover up a very poor decision and also make money at the same time. The Ford brand oil specific for that engine is the same stuff others sell, just at 3x the price.