With apologies to Python, M.
Fat Orange Man: I am your President.
Peasant Woman: Well, I didn't vote for you.
Fat Orange Man: Aussies can't vote for President.
Peasant Woman: Well, how'd you become President, then?
[Angelic music plays... ]
Fat Orange Man: The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Fat Orange Man, was to carry Excalibur. That is why I am your President.
Dennis the Peasant: Listen. Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
Fat Orange Man: Be quiet!
Dennis the Peasant: You can't expect to wield supreme power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!”