Bitcoin creator suspect says he is not Bitcoin creator suspect

The man identified as Bitcoin creator Satoshi Nakamoto in a new HBO documentary has something to say: Wrong again, world. In the just-released HBO film on the history of the world's biggest digital currency - Money Electric: The Bitcoin Mystery - documentary filmmaker Cullen Hoback comes to the conclusion that the anonymous …

[I ain't Spartacus]

I'm Satoshi Nakamoto.

[Neil Barnes]

And so is my wife.

[Satoshi Nakamoto]

Don't listen to these people. I'm the real Satoshi Nakamoto!

[Anonymous Coward]

If you were the real Satoshi Nakamoto, you'd be posting here as Anonymous Coward.

[The Real Satoshi Nakamoto]

<i>Whistling quietly, keeping a low profile, walking casually by, nothing to see here</i>

[The Real Satoshi Nakamoto]

These are not the devs you're looking for. Move along.

[Anonymous Coward]

And so am I - and I would prove it except there is not enough space in the margin

[Lee D]

This is Sparta!

No, wait.... wrong movie.

[Andy Mac]

Only the true Satoshi would deny his identity.

[Dinanziame]

Lisan al Gaib! Wait, no... He's the Messiah!

[Fr. Ted Crilly]

No, just a very naughty boy...

[Guy de Loimbard]

Love the Python reference.....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4HB7zqP9QNo

Just for a laugh, only the true messiah etc.

[Doctor Syntax]

Sounds reasonable. After all you're not Spartacus so you must be someone else.

[I ain't Spartacus]

Only problem is I wrote my password on a Post-It note and it's blown away.

I can't remember if I used password, Password or if I was using the ultimate secure one of Password123!

Fortunately I also invented the Segway and the Hover Board so I'm not short of a bob or two.

[Claptrap314]

No

I'm Spartacus.

[MyffyW]

I'm not Satoshi Nakamoto

(on the other hand, if I was, I'd probably say I wasn't. This letter has cost you 0.5 bitcoin)

[simonb_london]

I was too until I got debunked and now I feel much better.

[NoneSuch]

Imagine

What if Satoshi had his wallet on a USB thumb drive and lost it.

No one knows who he his and his embarrassment of losing 70+ billion drove him to silence.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Imagine

Has anyone seen activity on his account?

[Snowy]

Re: Imagine

Which account? no reason he just has one.

[doublelayer]

Re: Imagine

Not the known ones. It would have been quite simple for him to have had a bunch of them, some of which have been transacted over and over again while others stayed quiet. He could have earned no real money from any of his bitcoin or he could have cashed out quite a bit over the years, pretending to be an average miner or trader. We don't have enough information to prove which.

[Anonymous Coward]

I propose to put all

the bitcoin devs on an island, without any food, and the last one living will be deemed to be Sashimi Yakitori, or whatever the name of the guy some are looking for

[KittenHuffer]

Re: I propose to put all

But the devs themselves are food! Why else would <Diety> made them out of meat?

[I ain't Spartacus]

Re: I propose to put all

Eating people is wrong!

Have you been talking to your mother again?

[Snake]

Re: eating people is wrong

But then what the hell do I do with all this Soylent Green??

[Neil Barnes]

Re: I propose to put all

(talking to _one_ of your mothers again?)

But one of these for the Flanders and Swann reference --->

[DS999]

Does he own a private jet?

If not I can say with 99.9% confidence he is not Satoshi. Because even if someone with access to that wealth wanted to stay under the radar, they don't have to live a middle class life and fly cattle class!

[Richard 12]

Re: Does he own a private jet?

Running a personal private jet is stupendously expensive, and almost always pointless as it'll never be where you want it to be, and cannot go very far - unless it's an actual A330 or similar, you can't cross the Atlantic.

They exist to show off, not to be useful.

Flying first class on scheduled airlines is usually cheaper, more convenient and a much more luxurious experience.

[Dinanziame]

Re: Does he own a private jet?

In first class you still need to sit in the same cabin as (gasp) other people... No privacy, really. And they don't have your favorite brand of champagne. And they don't land on your private airport.

[Neil Barnes]

Re: Does he own a private jet?

So it won't wear out and need resurfacing, will it? Think of the money you'll save!

[DS999]

Re: Does he own a private jet?

A G5 has a range of 6500 miles, enough to fly from LA to London or Paris - not only across the Atlantic but across the US as well!

[IGotOut]

I wonder...

...if they stop to think that Satoshi Nakamoto isn't a single person, but a group of people, maybe even a company....or MAYBE...dum dum duuuuummmm

The Illuminati !

[I ain't Spartacus]

Re: I wonder...

Perhaps Satoshi nakamoto is all the friends we made along the way...

[Wade Burchette]

Re: I wonder...

Satoshi Nakamoto is actually the RAND Corporation, in conjunction with the saucer people, and under the supervision of the reverse vampires. We are through the looking glass here people.

[druck]

Not surprised

I'm not surprised no one wants to own up to being Satoshi Nakamoto, and forever be known as the creator of the most successful facilitator of digital crime in history, without which ransomware and many other online frauds would never had been viable.

[Psamathos]

Not the suspect, or not Satoshi?

He says that "he is not Bitcoin creator suspect", but did he ever say he wasn't Satoshi? I think we should be told.

[Spamolot]

I have it on reliable authority that the Great Orange orator is Satoshi Nakamoto. He's running false flag operations so he can pretend to be influenced into pressuring the SEC and Wall Street to adopt crypto into the mainstream when he's mysteriously re-elected come November. There will be another 'staged' assassination where his double will be killed. Thus the Orange man can fade into the annals of American political history, avoiding the looming disaster of divorce, while he quietly offloads his trillions in Bitcoin...

[Anonymous Coward]

> I have it on reliable authority that the Great Orange orator is Satoshi Nakamoto.

You're completely wrong. The real inventor of Bitcoin is Kim Jung Un and he did it in the 2 months between winning his second Nobel Prize and the world Chess championship.

[Fr. Ted Crilly]

Some say...

Satoshi is actually a construct of the Laughing Man...

And

That Project 2501 is the Bitcoin banker...

[Toni the terrible]

Re: Some say...

Is the Major after him?

[Anonymous Coward]

I'm spartacus!

[Bebu]

Witchfinder Reasoning

If I was Satoshi I would have destroyed my ability to prove I'm Satoshi

Todd: "I am not Satoshi!"

Inquisitor: "Can you prove you are Satoshi?"

Todd: "Of course not!"

Inquisitor: "By your own logic if you could prove it, you couldn't be Satoshi but since you can't prove it you must* be Satoshi."

_{A nod to the Python's Sir Bedivere qua inquisitor.}

_{* substitute with could for validity and to save firewood.}

[Sysgod]

Everyone is correct.

He is Satoshi. He destroyed everything pointing to him as Satoshi. He is afraid. He cares more about Bitcoin than wealth.

The OJ Simpson denial is obvious, unfortunately.

[Anonymous Coward]

please stand up, please stand up

I repeat