BOFH: AI consultant rapidly transitioned to new role as automotive surface consultant
BOFH logo telephone with devil's horns "STAGE THREE KLINGON, SIX O'CLOCK!" the PFY warns, as I'm making inroads into a lunchtime plate of onion bhajis. "?" I ask, searching for a reflective surface in lieu of looking around. "Blue-gray suit. Calming blue tie," he murmurs, as the footsteps approach. "Simon, Stephen..." the …
COMMENTS
-
-
-
Friday 27th September 2024 16:15 GMT tyrfing
Re: "In fact, I've helped a number of people take that first step into the space program."
Since he's clued in, he's already lasted much longer than average.
I suppose he'll last until he gets a directive that conflicts with the BOFH and he chooses...poorly.
After all, that training has a large dropout rate as well.
-
Thursday 3rd October 2024 14:27 GMT Anonymous Coward
Re: "In fact, I've helped a number of people take that first step into the space program."
He must be one of those rare bosses who survive - leaving the company of their own accord (and by the door, as opposed to leaving by the window at a vertical acceleration of 9,8 m/s2) before crossing the BOFH's and PFY's path.
-
-
Friday 27th September 2024 08:57 GMT Joe W
... almost there....
"The Boss senses my mental struggle and moves Matthew another half meter away."
At that rate the boss will move Matt along and onto the path of the PFY's Space Program. Or the footpath below the cafeteria's window. "Potato - solanum tuberosum" (I'll steal that phrase)
-
-
-
Friday 27th September 2024 15:44 GMT Elongated Muskrat
Re: ... almost there....
I had read that some tomato plants produce tubers, similar to potatoes, but due to the amount of solanidine they contain they are quite toxic (this is the poison in green potatoes, by the way). The fruiting bodies on potato plants are like small tomatoes, as well, but I'd not advise eating them.
The danger of grafting tomato stems onto potato roots is that tomato plants are very keen on putting out aerial roots, and thus those stems will root, and potentially produce their own tubers, mixed in with the potatoes. Yeah, I'd not take my chances eating them, thanks. I just grow the two as separate crops. They like different conditions, and are best planted at different times in our climate, anyway.
It's a bit like the novelty fruit trees, where different varieties of apples and pears are grafted onto the same rootstock; my grandparents had a tree which had a pear, an "eating" apple variety and a "cooking" apple variety grafted onto the same stock. The problem is that this is only really useful as a novelty. It's better to have three separate trees on their own stocks (or ungrafted if you want a "wild type" tree that you'll need to hire a cherry picker to harvest the fruit from), that way, you can optimise your harvest, and manage / remove diseased trees more easily.
-
Monday 30th September 2024 16:02 GMT imanidiot
Re: ... almost there....
Yes, you can graft tomato plants onto potato plant roots (https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0304423821001576, https://extension.purdue.edu/extmedia/HO/HO-260-W.pdf) though it seems the goal is usually to improve the root stock resistance against rot and pests to improve the yield of the tomato, not to harvest potatoes (And if the above ground plant puts a lot of energy into producing tomato fruits, I don't think the roots will produce an appreciable amount of sufficiently sized tubers for eating)
-
-
-
-
Monday 30th September 2024 20:46 GMT John Brown (no body)
Re: ... almost there....
Yeah, it's one thing for El Reg to "standardise" on "American" English, it's quite another to mis-spell a unit of measure they don't really use outside of science labs and so most Americans probably would not even notice if it was spelled properly. Wikipedia gets it right, but NIST doesn't :-/
-
-
Friday 27th September 2024 09:33 GMT Bebu
The new boss was clearly
born with a well developed survival instinct.
Simon is slipping. By now I would have thought he would have installed concealed cameras covering all approaches to his lair (office), his back and his role transition device(s) as well displaying the cameras' images in a window on his screen.
I imagine if he doesn't reevaluate his notion of what constitutes fine or at least healthy dining he might be facing an unanticipated role transition in the no too distant future which might not be too tragic if he were keen on barbecues.
Classic:
"Really?" Matthew says, impressed. "That first step's probably a big one."
(Unusually prescient for a blighter of his water.)
-
Friday 27th September 2024 12:00 GMT Flocke Kroes
It took me a moment to figure out the New Boss
Surely Matthew's arrival was scheduled at least a day before and New Boss should have been able to anticipate his departure before parking his car that morning. It makes sense if New Boss considered Matthew to be a problem IT could fix. Presumably at some point the police will be around to ask questions and an obvious question to avoid is "Why didn't you park in your usual space today?" Making an insurance claim sounds much simpler than giving the police a reason to be suspicious.
-
Friday 27th September 2024 12:10 GMT Anonymous Anti-ANC South African Coward
"SO DO I!" the PFY gasps. "In fact, I've helped a number of people take that first step into the space program."
"Really?" Matthew says, impressed. "That first step's probably a big one."
"You have no idea," the PFY sighs.
"And would I have heard of any of these people?" Matthew asks politely.
"I shouldn't think so," the PFY says. "There's a hell of a dropout rate. So to speak."
Translated : I've helped a number of people through the window on the 30th floor, but they just keep on falling...
-
Friday 27th September 2024 15:48 GMT A.P. Veening
Translated : I've helped a number of people through the window on the 30th floor, but they just keep on falling...
I first read that last word with an "i" for the first "l".
However, upon consideration, there should be some of them that don't fail and rise to Heaven. The others will keep falling for a while longer.
-
-
-
-
Saturday 28th September 2024 08:12 GMT Chasxith
Re: Human-fired power station
It'll have more corporate bullshit though. Like below courtesy of Gemini:
## Overly Corporate Job Titles for a Human-Fuelled Power Station
### Executive Roles
1. **Chief Combustion Coordinator**
2. **Vice President of Human Heat Harvesting**
3. **Director of Sweat Equity Management**
### Technical Roles
4. **Human Fuel Efficiency Engineer**
5. **Biometric Burnout Analyst**
6. **Ethical (or Unethical) Compliance Clown**
### Operational Roles
7. **Human Fuel Intake Scheduler**
8. **Power Generation Cheerleader**
9. **Waste Product Enthusiast**
10. **Public Relations Spin Doctor**
-
-
-
Friday 27th September 2024 19:48 GMT Martin Gregorie
Re: Human-fired power station
... but the original story ("Make Room, Make Room") is about seven years older than "Soylent Green". I used to know its author, Harry Harrison, who was a regular at a monthly SF gathering in a London pub, along with Arthur C, whose "Tales from the White Hert" describes an earlier incarnation of the SF group.
Harry was a very nice, funny guy. I like his books and storys, especially "A Transatlanlic Tunnel,Hurrah, but I never liked "Make Room, Make Room", and so have never seen "Soylent Green".
-
-
Saturday 28th September 2024 15:59 GMT Dimmer
Re: Human-fired power station
If it really becomes useful:
Is your office paperless? Might be a good fit for AI.
What job will be left for you? Government?
Well in the states, at least half of the people either are on government subsidies or employed by it.
Who will be left to pay the taxes ? I know I can’t. I am already at 50% +. Can you?
I believe in government, but I despise bureaucracy.
There are so many regulations and the whole infrastructure to support them that have no benefit to the people. Certainly countless things like medical regulation is needed, but painting fingernails, requiring id for livestock?
If AI is going to take jobs, let it start there and it might actually benefit mankind.
-
Monday 30th September 2024 14:29 GMT Sherrie Ludwig
Re: Human-fired power station
If AI is going to take jobs, let it start there and it might actually benefit mankind.
Yeah, I don't want AI writing articles or papers for me, I want a Roomba that will clean my bathroom, and not just the floor. A clothes hamper that sorts the stuff tossed in, and at least notifies when there's enough for a load of a particular type.
-
-
-
Saturday 28th September 2024 14:25 GMT Evil Auditor
At a conference, I once raised and discussed the question of the applicability of a certain EU regulation (which may or may not have been the AI Act) in the domestic market. One uber-clever guy, after reaching the limits of his argumentation, passed on the question to some popular LLM and blurted out its response, unfiltered and unverified, as a matter of fact.
It was a real struggle to resist both the urge to humiliate uber-clever guy in front of the crowd and to bludgeon him.
-
-
Monday 30th September 2024 20:55 GMT John Brown (no body)
Re: I've just realised to my utter horror...
In the current work climate, it's often frowned upon when applying for jobs to have "stagnated" in the same role for so long. A year or two seems to be the accepted norm before moving onto different[*] pastures.
* As well know, the grass is rarely greener on the other side.
-