Tesla Cybertruck turns into world's most expensive brick after car wash

The perils of turning cars into computers were laid bare by a hapless Cybertruck owner who claimed his ride was rendered an $80,000 "paperweight" by something as benign as a wash. Now, we tech-savvy people are well aware that computers and water do not mix. But cars get dirty, and when you've tossed your life savings into a …

[that one in the corner]

Wash? WASH?

Don't you know these things are only meant as collector's items? There are fewer than 4,000 in existence!

You shouldn't wash them - heck, you shouldn't even peel off the plastics from the windscreen. Collector's items should *always* be kept mint in box[1]

[1] and put it between two bits of cardboard, to stop it getting bent.

[Yes Me]

Re: Wash? WASH?

box[0][0] surely?

[StargateSg7]

Re: Wash? WASH?

And don't call me Shirley!

V

[simonlb]

Re: Wash? WASH?

Yeah, it's not like most people buy a car then leave it outside for the rest of its existence. Why would it ever need washing?

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Wash? WASH?

Cybertruck or Clusterfuck? History will certainly decide.

[M.V. Lipvig]

Re: Wash? WASH?

No, I don't think history will be making this decision. History requires the passage of time, and we already knew this would be a clusterfuck when it was first announced.

[Not-P]

Re: Wash? WASH?

Box, box, box.

And stay there.

[Randy Hudson]

What a BS article. There's no indication that the car wash did anything to this truck. The owner rebooted the screen and for whatever reason that takes several hours. Truck was working normally the next day.

Also, the screen isn't needed to drive the vehicle. You can still shift and drive without the touchscreen.

[Zola]

Re: Wash? WASH?

And as we all know - don't forget to remove the batteries for long term storage, because when they leak they can REALLY mess things up!

[Anonymous Coward]

So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

If washing your Muskmobile in direct sunlight voids the warranty? What happens when the sun is shining on the other side of the road and your side is in the middle of a downpour?

These things are not what the Tesla Cult members hoped and prayed that they would be.

No wonder the Norwegians think that the viable life of a Model Y anywhere outside Oslo is 2 years.

But the cult will still worship evey cent of that $65M salary he's trying to get. I wonder how much tax he'll pay on that. 0% Texas income tax, that is for sure but I recon around $750.00 of federal taxes. After all, that is what his dear leader (Trump) paid for years (when it wasn't zero).

Perhaps he should wait until after 5th November and 'the Donald' becomes POTUS elect? Trump wants to cut taxes for the 0.001% (Musk and friends) and decimate Social Security. Then he could walk away with every penny of that $65M.

The USA is FSCK'd if Trumpo gets re-elected. 10% tax on everything coming across the border (if you can find one that is open...) The likes of Lord Elon of Muskrat won't mind but for the ordinary citizen it will be a disaster.

Thankfully, I have a boat and can leave. Cuba looks mightily inviting and it is only 90 miles away.

[perkele]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

It's not 56m, but 56bn the muskyone is seeking - https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2024/apr/17/elon-musk-tesla-pay

[Dan 55]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

How much would that work out per car sold? Would they even make a profit?

[vtcodger]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

"Would they even make a profit?"

A quick check says that's about half Tesla's gross profits for the past 5 or 6 years. I do think Musk deserves to be paid. Quite a lot. However $56B seems a bit excessive to me, but it appears that I'm singularly lacking in vision.

[MachDiamond]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

"It's not 56m, but 56bn the muskyone is seeking"

With what he has already been awarded and the drop in stock price, it's now figured at ~$45bn. The question is how much more the stock can drop before Elon is completely underwater financially.

[alain williams]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

It's not 56m, but 56bn the muskyone is seeking - https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2024/apr/17/elon-musk-tesla-pay

He needs that $56B to pay for his losses on twatter.

[MachDiamond]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

"He needs that $56B to pay for his losses on twatter."

Wellllll, it might be a good idea to refrain from telling customers to GFY.

[hedgie]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

While they certainly *do* want to eviscerate Social Security, the tax on that is ultimately regressive, and IIRC, becomes so at around ~90k a year. If that cap were lifted, and applied, even at a paltry 1% on things like capital gains or the massive loans the super-rich usually live on, the US could cut the actual rate, thereby giving the working (and in many parts of the country middle) classes a real tax break while simultaneously keeping the system solvent practically forever.

[MachDiamond]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

"a paltry 1% on things like capital gains or the massive loans the super-rich usually live on"

Am I reading this right? Are you suggesting that the US start taxing debt?

Elon is known to have loads of loans and lines of credit secured with some of his Tesla stock. He could sell stock to have money to live on and pay alimony/child support in a bunch of directions but, it would water down his stake in Tesla. He's chosen the risky path of leveraging his assets instead. The banks could call his loans or make modifications and collect on the security if they are feeling nervous which would mean Elon losing some of his stake and expose himself to a shareholder vote that removes him from company management.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

"tax on that is ultimately regressive, and IIRC, becomes so at around ~90k a year."

In fact, the tax is flat: 6.2%. The claim of regressiveness stems from there being a cap on the tax paid per year, that cap being $168,600 in 2024. However, the benefits that people receive are also capped in the same way, so while those who earn more don't pay more, they also don't receive more. You can do what you like with this information, but it's probably useful to use the correct values when making suggestions.

[VicMortimer]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

It's regressive because it's charged from the first dollar, is actually 15.3%, and it's capped.

It's the LIE that rich people tell when they claim 49% of Americans don't pay federal tax. That 15.3% plus the 10% tax bracket means that the poorest Americans actually pay MORE federal income tax than the richest Americans, who usually only pay the 20% capital gains tax, since they don't actually typically earn a penny.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

"It's regressive because it's charged from the first dollar, is actually 15.3%, and it's capped."

Let's deal with this. The cap, I already mentioned that. It's important and I will cover it more. The 15.3% is incorrect. I can see where you're getting it. There is a 6.2% income tax, a 6.2% payroll tax, and two 1.45% taxes. You're adding these together to get 15.3%. The problem is that two of those are payroll taxes, paid by the employer, and that both 1.45% taxes are for a different program, Medicare. Crucially for your point, Medicare taxes are not only not capped, but they increase by 0.9% for higher incomes. As they are separate taxes that work in a very different, and indeed the opposite way, they're not what is being discussed here.

The cap is important as well because the Social Security program pays out in proportion to the tax paid in. The tax is capped because payments are capped. If the cap is lifted, the current design of the program would require people earning ten times as much to get ten times the payments. It was intended to be a separate program which is why it is taxed separately. You can redesign that program to collect more taxes and not pay in proportion, but you have to understand why it is set up that way in order to deal with the problems you will face while doing so.

[lglethal]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Now I understand why the US is so screwed with medical, education and the whole social safety net. You guys pay sweet FA in tax. It's hardly a surprise then that there's no money for anything worthwhile.

I pay pretty much on the dot 40% of my wages in tax, medical, pension, etc. That doesn't count the extras I spend personally on various insurances. And I don't mind that, it's why we have great roads, a good (and almost free) medical system, and good schools.

It would be nice to pay a bit less in taxes, but if it means losing those benefits, then screw it. Call me a socialist, if you must, but I like having a good system that doesn't leave the poorest behind.

I wonder how most Americans would react if you told them they had to pay 40% in taxes but that would guarantee them free medical, well funded schools, and good roads. I get the feeling most would reject it as being "Commie Talk", but then again that's the view of an outsider looking in... Who knows maybe the majority are more sane then we give you credit for?

[Eclectic Man]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel - Re; 40% TAXES

"I wonder how most Americans would react if you told them they had to pay 40% in taxes but that would guarantee them free medical, well funded schools, and good roads."

I was once offered a job in Germany. I worked to that taxes and mandatory insurance and pension contributions would be more than 50% of my pay. But then Germany has excellent social services. In the UK we* constantly complain that taxes are too high, but hypocritically want Western European style services with USA taxation levels.

*Well, politicians, mainly, after all there will be a General Election sometime reasonably soon and they need to 'have an issue' to generate voter interest.

[Korev]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel - Re; 40% TAXES

Britain has now somehow managed to simultaneously have a record tax take at the same time that everything seems to be falling apart. If I still lived in Britain I'd be asking where the f^&* the money is all going...

[ChrisC]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel - Re; 40% TAXES

Indeed. I think if was more obvious what exactly we were getting in return for all the money HMRC expects from us, there'd be somewhat less discontent over how much money that is. But when people are struggling with the basics like getting a GP appointment, or being able to drive more than a few hundred yards without needing to avoid potholes large enough to swallow a whale (or even Wales), it's not unreasonable, as you note, to be wondering just WTF is happening to the billions we're pouring into the government coffers.

[Rich 11]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel - Re; 40% TAXES

it's not unreasonable, as you note, to be wondering just WTF is happening to the billions we're pouring into the government coffers.

Much of it is still going to pay off the consequences of quantitive easing. Both Labour (then in government) and the Conservatives agreed (see George Osborne's HoC speech, recorded in Hansard, 8th October 2008) that QE was the best available response to the 2007 global financial crisis triggered by CDO gambling in the US financial market; other countries followed suit. But while most other countries then focused on investment to get them out of the QE situation, when Cameron's 2010 coalition government came in they instead chose austerity out of purely ideological reasons. The IMF and others urged investment, but the Coalition government went ahead regardless. Other countries have since seen the fruits of their investment and are now mostly clear of the QE hit to their national debt; the UK is not. Of course the situation here hasn't been helped by Cameron then running scared of losing half a dozen seats to UKIP in the 2015 election, so as part of the Tory manifesto he promised a Brexit referendum in the hope that this would defuse the challenge. Not his finest moment: he ended up winning an election and losing a government.

[MJI]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel - Re; 40% TAXES

Rwanda

[Eclectic Man]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel - Re; 40% TAXES

And remember the tens of millions we pay the French to patrol their borders on the English Channel / La Manche to stop the small boats from setting out.

I am, however, a bit concerned about the sudden (to me) insistence by vociferous politicians on both sides of the pond that the first priority of a government is to secure the country's borders. Register historians please advise, but when has any country in history ever actually genuinely secured its own borders? Both Japan and China tried centuries ago, both failed to some extent. And today even North Korea does not manage it completely. I can only think of the Andaman Islands where the government of India effectively prevents incursions, but that is about it. And what they will do when teh seas rise I have no idea.

"The Andaman Islands are home to the Andamanese, a group of indigenous people made up of a number of tribes, including the Jarawa and Sentinelese. While some of the islands can be visited with permits, entry to others, including North Sentinel Island, is banned by law. The Sentinelese are generally hostile to visitors and have had little contact with any other people. The Indian government and coast guard protect their right to privacy"

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andaman_Islands

[Patrician]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel - Re; 40% TAXES

Michelle Mone would be able to tell you where some went....

[StargateSg7]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

And if you are in the GTA (Greater Toronto Area) or Metro Vancouver area, which i suspect you are, you can add the extra 10% on top for housing costs and expensive gas and food prices!

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

It is quite true that the US has lower tax rates than most European countries. The numbers I cited are not the only taxes out there, and the higher brackets can end up looking more normal to you, but it's certainly true that someone earning a middle class income is likely to be paying less. For example, the median individual income of $40,480 would involve a total of $5,970 in federal taxes for about a 14.7% rate. Someone earning at a higher level, let's say $150,000, would pay $37,014 or 24.7%. There are further taxes at the state level which can add a bit more, but usually in the area of 3-7%.

One of the reasons why the political cultures are different is that the US is used to these lower tax rates and people don't like the idea of having them increase. There are many proposals to increase the tax rates on the wealthy, not that they frequently get passed because the wealthy don't like the idea either, but one thing that is very unpopular among everyone is the idea of increasing taxation for people earning less. One party says that taxes will not be raised at all, and the other one says that taxes will not be raised on you if you earn less than $400k a year, meaning that, unless that breaks, the US's tax situation will always be very different from the one many European countries are familiar with.

Note that the calculations above are the basic ones. Lots of variables change how much tax a given person pays, such as whether they have children (my calculations ignored them) or are married (I calculated for a single person). It also only includes normal wage income.

[yetanotheraoc]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

"Who knows maybe the majority are more sane then we give you credit for?"

No, we're not.

[jmch]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

"You guys pay sweet FA in tax. "

I wouldn't say sweet FA... It's certainly less than most of Europe, but besides social security and federal tax there are state and local taxes. As far as I can simply work out, a median earner would be paying around 25%-ish. Also, a giant mess of sales taxes (typically higher than VAT in Europe), which for some insane reason isn't shown on any price tags like VAT is in Europe. So an item marked $10 on the shelf really costs $12-ish. Is that 40% you mention in the UK? Because I'm pretty sure it's even higher in the Nordic countries.

"It would be nice to pay a bit less in taxes, but if it means losing those benefits, then screw it."

Well, how much you pay is one thing, what you get out of it is quite another. For example my experience in Switzerland is that direct tax is quite low, probably 20% or less depending on canton, on top of which everyone has to pay a mandatory health insurance which could be an extra 3-5%. Even considering that you have to pay at the counter for a lot of government services, the 'all-in' government take is probably comparable to the US. BUT on the other hand, everything runs incredibly smoothly and efficiently. Dealing with government agencies, while never a pleasure, is at least not a pain nor a gigantic waste of time. How much of the 40% you pay aren't actually going into benefits for the population at large but to self-serving bureaucracy, or shoveled towards 'friendly' contractors???

[jake]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

"So an item marked $10 on the shelf really costs $12-ish."

You pay 20% sales tax where you live? Might consider moving and/or voting. The national average was under 10% last time I looked (Note to Brits ... sales tax here in the US varies by state and city. It's entirely too convoluted for it's own good.)

[jmch]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

"You pay 20% sales tax where you live?"

No, just indicative example.... my experience of US sales taxes are from a couple of decades ago in Florida, IIRC it was over 10%... but awkward enough to multiply that I gave up trying to work out the correct price of everything after a while (which, I guess, is part of the point of refusing to post prices including sales tax).

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

I am EU-based. I pay just over 50% of my income in direct taxation. I don't have free medical services, the schools are not particularly well-funded and the roads are becoming more pot-holed with every passing day. I get very little back for the contributions I make, and yes, I find it particularly galling.

[JustAnotherITPerson]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

I live in the US and a little over 33% of my paycheck goes to taxes and insurance (retirement not included). 33% of my check is taken before I even see it and then I get to pay out of my butt for any medical expenses.

[hedgie]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

I honestly wouldn't be complaining about what I'm paying were the ultra-wealthy not paying single-digit percentages of their haul, are subsidised by the working stiffs]1], and the state of public services so dire as a result. Forty plus years of tax cuts, an ever increasing wealth divide, crumbling institutions and infrastructure, greater political polarisation and increasing desperation all are consequences of that. Within my own lifetime, I would have been living fairly comfortably in SF off service industry wages + tips[2] than I can now off of a "real" job somewhere far lower rent. While something like a Universal Basic Income is mostly championed by folks on the left these days, one of its earlier proponents was the quite conservative Milton Friedman. Although, anything like that would require someone to pay for it, and $BILLIONAIRE or $MEGACORP coughing up some of the funds which they enjoy as a result of a largely market economy make the most sensible choices.

[1] I can accept that there are times where an industry is critical enough that sweetheart tax deals or even direct subsidies might be required, although not to the extent on which they're given a metric fuckton of money to not do the work. All I ask in return is that those reaping the financial rewards are forced to give back to us.

[2] Had I not lost my mind and torpedoed it all.

[martinusher]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

>You guys pay sweet FA in tax.

That's news to me.

[Hugh McIntyre]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

These 6.2% + 1.45% payroll taxes are *only* for Social Security and Medicare. I.e. the equivalent of UK National Insurance tax. People also pay regular income tax at the Federal and (mostly) state levels. So the overall total can be ~ 40% here as well.

Overall, the max rate for California is actually about the same (45% for UK, 37% federal + 12.3% for California ~= 50%). But the income thresholds are higher, so at the income where the UK 45% rate starts, California would only be at 32+9.3%. But this is still not much difference.

The real difference, except for no-income-tax states, is that social security taxes are capped at $168.8k of income, so that very high earners pay a lower rate. The Democrats want to raise this cap though, to fix the social security funding gap.

And of course, this does not include pre-retirement medical (employer or individual needs to pay), pension (social security is probably similar to UK state pension, and does not include private pension savings).

[jmch]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

"The problem is that two of those are payroll taxes, paid by the employer"

Ah, the beautiful scam of 'employer contribution'. There is, in fact, no difference between:

A worker gets paid $107.50, the government takes $15 in social security contribution

AND

A worker gets paid $100, the government takes $7.50 in social security contribution and the employer matches that with another $7.50

In both cases, the employer pays 107.50, the government gets 15, worker gets 92.50. But employers and governments go along with the fiction that is the second case because it looks like the government is taxing at half the rate that it actually is, while the employer gets to look generous. Guess what, the employer is calculating that contribution when it sets salary levels!! So I don't know about the 1.45% bit, but the 'employer contribution' is very definitely a government tax that is borne by the employee.

With regard to the cap, that is exactly the point, it is set up to be completely directly proportional, which makes it more of a burden in real (non-percentage) terms for lower-income earners. But frankly, messing around with the cap is tinkering around the edges, social security is a broken model. It was set up with retirement at 60 when life expectancy was 65 and worker-pensioner ratio was about 10:1. Now life expectancy is in the high 70s and worker-pensioner ratio is about 4:1 and falling. People protesting the increase in pensionable age are deluded. They might have been duped by successive generations of politicians kicking this particular can down the road, but the maths doesn't lie. Anyone drawing a pension for 15+ years after 40-45 years work paying 15% contribution is taking far more out of the system than they put in - that's the baby boomers got themselves sorted! Meanwhile my generation (Gen X) will have spent all our working lives contributing to the boomers' pensions since they turned 60, will probably have to work until 70 and even then it's questionable if we ever receive a pension. Successive generations are even more screwed, but at least they can start saving privately early for their own retirement (oh, yes, with what savings, you will ask???)

[Eclectic Man]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

The genuine difference is that the worker whose pay is officially $107.50 can put the same percentage, but actually more money into a pension fund (capped in the UK by percentage of annual pay or £40,000) than the worker paid $100.00.

This is an often ignored problem with having a 'London weighting' for workers. The pension (and housing if they can afford to buy it) of a London worker will be much more valuable than the of the Stockport or Lytham St Annes worker when they retire, despite having done exactly the same job for the same length of time.

After my first experience of genuine 'accountancy'* I decided that I was not going down that road, as it messed with my head.

* ("why am I paid so much?" - "Do you really want to know?", "Yes", "well, you were 17 when you started but we didn't want the bother of changing your rate mid way through so we assumed you were 18. Then you came in 37.5 hours a week, so we assumed that had we asked you would have come in 40 hours, so you were paid for that. And you got bonuses for attending every working day per month.")

[david 12]

Answers on a postcard, please.

washing your Muskmobile in direct sunlight voids the warranty?

If you wash in direct sunlight, you will leave soap and hard-water residues on the item you are washing.

Hence the instructions for my car (not a Tesla), and my car-wash detergent (also not from Tesla).

Water marks on my car or glassware aren't covered by warranty. How you got from that to "voids warranty" is an open question. Answers on a postcard, please.

[Rich 11]

Re: Answers on a postcard, please.

"Do not wash in direct sunlight"

Does the owner's manual also warn against feeding it after midnight?

[Medixstiff]

Re: Answers on a postcard, please.

Yet my 14 year old car, now on it's third owner, still has - apart from a small ding or two in a door, thanks to inconsiderate a-holes - a spot free, glossy paint job with no peel of any sort.

Obviously, they don't make cars like they used to.

[jacampbell]

Re: Answers on a postcard, please.

Bubbles of water can act as a lens, intensifying sunlight - which can damage the paint.

You should not wash any car in direct sunlight.

[Dagg]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

There is nothing wrong with using Stainless Steel. It worked ok on the DeLorean.

Maybe this is a special muskovite eStainlessSteel that degrades over time so you will need to undergo a periodic replacement upgrade.

[Ian Johnston]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Actually it didn't work ok on the DeLorean, because the brushed finish was almost impossible to clean.

[StargateSg7]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

It's 301 Grade Stainless Steel which is good BUT they SHOULD have used 316 Marine Grade for best corrosion resistance for the price.

Aerospace grades with super high nickel, cobalt, chromium and vanadium or molybdenum are five times the price of 316 Marine Grade Stainless Steel.

[DS999]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

If they can't use a high enough grade that it won't rust, they shouldn't have used it at all. There's a reason why all cars have a painted finish, and there is zero reason to use stainless steel other than "people told me I couldn't so I decided to show them", which is probably the same reason why it was made "bulletproof" which is a totally useless feature on a vehicle unless you're a world leader like the president or pope.

I wonder what it costs to insure one? All newer cars are more expensive to fix in a minor fender bender due to all the sensors, but that stainless steel which can't be undented and comes in such large pieces surely ramps up the repair cost and therefore insurance cost. I imagine Cyberdick owners are paying through the nose for that, or at least I hope they do because I don't want to be subsidizing them with my insurance!

[spuck]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

With regards to the cost for collision repairs... since the body is made of large panels that must be replaced instead of straightened out, sanded and repainted, the parts cost will be more for even a minor collision, but I wonder if that won't work out to be cheaper in the long run since labor is such a huge cost for autobody work?

[jake]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

A friend used to make quite the living doing body work on DeLoreans. He reports that the biggest single problem wasn't dents ... it was getting rid of the millions of little rust streaks after clueless owners washed their car with a brillo pad.

[jmch]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

"There is nothing wrong with using Stainless Steel."

It's not so much the use of stainless steel that is a problem as the refusal to add a clear coat layer.

[Not Yb]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Using the DeLorean as an example of a car that worked OK? It (among many other mistakes) took down an entire company.

[jake]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

The DeLorean, as a car, was OK (if slow and evil handling).

It was the owner's curious ideas about appropriate funding that brought the company down.

[alain williams]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

If washing your Muskmobile in direct sunlight voids the warranty? What happens when the sun is shining on the other side of the road and your side is in the middle of a downpour?

Hmmm: sun and rain at the same time. Look harder in the manual for the paragraph that tells you to pay for repairs using the crock of gold at the bottom of the rainbow.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Maybe it's different where you live, but I've lived in places where that happens. There are all sorts of names for it. Usually, it happens on windy days. Sometimes, one side of a building is sunny and dry and the other side is cloudy and raining, but sometimes, it's sunny and raining in the same place. Actually, I think it's mostly wind blowing raindrops away from where the cloud is, but it doesn't feel much different if you're out in it. The same could apply if you drive through a brief rainstorm and out into sunlight, because the rainwater is still on your car when that happens. I've been in even more places where small rainclouds form, rather than it only raining when the sky is overcast.

[My-Handle]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

It happens all the time here in Northern Ireland. We typically get very showery weather. In the mornings, evenings or during winter, the sun is low in the sky. This can mean that the sun is shining even if you have a rain cloud right over your head.

[Michael Wojcik]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Yes, micro-weather is very common here in the Rockies. Sunny and snowing is pretty common too; I had that happen here at the house a few weeks back.

I was driving south near the Colorado-New Mexico border once, in bright sunlight, and there was an absolutely torrential downpour happening in the field to my left. The edge of the rain was perhaps a couple of hundred feet away. I could have easily parked and walked over into it.

When the North American Monsoon is robust, it's quite common out here to look over at the mountains in the late afternoon or early evening and see some small thunderstorms gradually making their way toward town. Often you'll be in bright sunlight and you can see the dense rain curtains and rainbows off in the east. Maybe a storm will come your way, and maybe not; but you have plenty of warning, because you can see exactly where it's raining and watch it move.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Where I live that happens often enough - they're termed sun showers.

[The Oncoming Scorn]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Can we please start calling Elon The Stainless Steel Muskrat.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

No. The Stainless Steel Rat doesn't deserve the comparison.

[M.V. Lipvig]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Thank you.

Must find my copies for a reread, maybe after I finish reading the wife's Heinliens. Talk about a messed up dude...

[EricB123]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

I thought stainless steel rats were only a New York City phenomenon

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Definitely not. It is repeatedly pointed out that despite the rat's criminal history, he has a conscience. He only steals from organizations with insurance and deplores violence.

Possibly the only similarity is that he justifies his crimes by arguing that he is providing society with entertainment. Musk also does this, although unintentionally.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Nah. Cant possibly compare his muskiness to slippery Jim. One is a (mostly) reformed crook. The other is still a crook.

[Eclectic Man]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Also, slippery Jim got caught.

[Michael Strorm]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Elon Musk, purveyor of Stainless Steel Tat?

[Michael Wojcik]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Or Stainless Steel Crap — take your pick.

[Jamie Jones]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Don't forget removing environmental protections, removing regulation on wall street, and most worrying of all, sacking all civil servants and replacing them with trumophants.

https://www.reuters.com/markets/us/if-trump-wins-he-plans-free-wall-street-burdensome-regulations-2024-04-12/"

[Jamie Jones]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

So... 2 downvoters think that is a good thing..

[parrot]

Re: So much for the resilience of Stainless Steel

Off they went with a trumpety trump, trump trump trump.

[Detective Emil]

Tesla pipped to this particular post

Mercedes came up with it in 2019 or so. A quick search suggests that pricey Rivian and BMW models have it too.

[Roland6]

Re: Tesla pipped to this particular post

Interesting, it doesn’t mention whether the electric car can be put through one of those conveyor style car washes where the front wheels get locked on and the car rolls forward through the car wash.

I bet AI will have problems reliably identifying a car wash and so automatically put the car in car wash mode and resume normal,drive mode on completion of the wash…

Interesting, for my dumb car, I simply turn off the ignition and drive systems such as auto windscreen wipers turn off and wing mirrors turn in, when the light go green, I restart the engine and simply drive off…

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Tesla pipped to this particular post

I have a 2017 Peugeot which has one of those annoying auto-handbrakes so as soon as I kill the ignition it locks. It can be disengaged if you turn the key into contact mode, but I always have to keep the engine running for an external* car wash because you can't trust that car not to suddenly decide to go into some weird eco-mode and lock the brakes again - frankly, its user interface and the functionality of it is so bad it could have been designed by Microsoft.

The only absolutely undisputable good thing of that car is its engine. If they made the rest of the car like they make their diesels it would have been a wonderful vehicle. As it is it's very, er, French in that parts of it regularly go on strike.

That said, next month things will get worse as it's a company car and it will now be replaced by a Volvo EV. The company is going to whinge at me to find cheaper places to charge, but I did warn them that I'm not in a place with plenty charging options so it's kinda self inflicted..

* _{We have a car wash on site where the washer moves, not the car - easier :)}

[Linker3000]

Not a unique issue

My car (2010 vintage) also has a car wash mode - it's called "Tuck in the wing mirrors and flatten the roof-mounted antenna".

Sheesh, that Tesla boot time is slower than my homebrew 4MHz Z80 machine starting CP/M from an Hitachi 4GB Microdrive.

Too much tech will get you every time.

[Doctor Syntax]

Re: Not a unique issue

A lot of RAM and a very thorough RAM test on reboot?

[aerogems]

Re: Not a unique issue

That would make it the only thing that gets thoroughly tested at Tesla.

[Kevin McMurtrie]

Re: Not a unique issue

Spring Boot on 2W TDP CPU

[ThereBePirates]

Re: Not a unique issue

Don't forget the little plastic bag they give you to pop over the rear wiper

[Eclectic Man]

Re: Not a unique issue

that Tesla boot time is slower than my homebrew 4MHz Z80 machine starting CP/M from an Hitachi 4GB Microdrive

Ever tried using Kermit over a dial-up connection (to the original JANET - Joint Academic NETwork)? You could watch the little dots creeping across the screen, and every now and then a little asterisk would tell you a packet had to be re-sent. Happy , innocent days ...

[perkele]

It's not 56m, but 56bn the muskyone is seeking - https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2024/apr/17/elon-musk-tesla-pay

[AlanB]

Car wash mode

Allegedly the "car wash mode" is "turn off the windscreen wipers, wind up the windows, don't fold the mirrors, lock the charging cover flap that otherwise opens if something touches it".

If you're going to put all the controls on touchscreen menus (hint - you shouldn't), then having a "mode" that does all of them at once isn't as ridiculous as it first sounds.

If it can't handle Edinburgh rain it's not surprising it can't handle a car wash, but the mode won't help with that.

https://www.edinburghlive.co.uk/news/edinburgh-news/edinburgh-couple-fume-handed-17k-27906242.amp

Nowhere close to the promises Musk was making about it, of course.

"Cybertruck will be waterproof enough to serve briefly as a boat, so it can cross rivers, lakes & even seas that aren’t too choppy"

https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/1575508498430820352?lang=en

"We are going to offer a mod package that enables Cybertruck to traverse at least 100m of water as a boat.

Mostly just need to upgrade cabin door seals."

https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/1736943517115482218?lang=en

[sev.monster]

Re: Car wash mode

The Cybertruck is as much of a boat as his nan's soiled underoos. That is to say, not at all, and very musty.

Sent mine in for drycleaning with the underoos.

[that one in the corner]

Re: Car wash mode

Fair's fair, at no time did Musk say that the Cybertruck would work as a powered boat.

The "mod package" is clearly just rowlocks[1][2]

[1] "Bring your own oars"

[2] for the unnautical, the 'w' is pronounced more like a second 'l'; think "how would Scooby Doo say it?"

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Car wash mode

Powered boat you say? Porsche are already there

[lglethal]

Re: Car wash mode

I believe the correct pronunciation is like bollocks...

Which is exactly what the man is speaking...

[Doctor Syntax]

Re: Car wash mode

"If it can't handle Edinburgh rain"

The phrase "not of merchantable quality" occurs to me.

[heyrick]

Re: Car wash mode

If it can't handle a car wash, it probably wouldn't cope with the rain around here. It doesn't rain often in this corner of Brittany, but when it does you rapidly understand why the ditches beside the roads are at least half a metre to a metre deep.

Which means it's a bit of a crock of shit given that even the weird little Citroën Ami can cope with our rain.

[biddibiddibiddibiddi]

Re: Car wash mode

Other than closing the charging flap, all those other items are normal things people know to do before going into a car wash (and if they don't, they deserve to get splashed with soap). Even the charging port hardly counts as it's only a different type of fuel port, and you do need to close the gas cap on an ICE vehicle at all times, not just during a car wash. Making it all happen with a single touch just contributes to people being dumb.

[Richard 12]

Re: Car wash mode

My "charging port" locks automatically with the doors.

It only unlocks if I get out of the car, which I generally don't do in an automatic car wash.

In fact, thinking about it, the "charging port" of every car I've ever owned locked automatically, though some of them needed a key inserted to unlock.

That said, a "Don't fold the wing mirrors" setting would be useful.

[John Brown (no body)]

Re: Car wash mode

"That said, a "Don't fold the wing mirrors" setting would be useful."

Don't they normally only fold in when you lock the car? That's how all the ones I've had with that feature do it. Just switching off or fully off, even removing the key (where that's still a thing) doesn't usually fold them in.

[Richard 12]

Re: Car wash mode

Yes, but there are times when it would be better if I could lock the vehicle without them folding.

Eg if I'm expecting ice overnight, I'd prefer they stay in the "driving position" rather than potentially needing to de-ice the mechanism before unlocking in the morning.

'Tis a minor gripe of course

[Roland6]

Re: Car wash mode

> If you're going to put all the controls on touchscreen menus (hint - you shouldn't), then having a "mode" that does all of them at once isn't as ridiculous as it first sounds.

The majority of these should also happen when you park a car. So having a bespoke “car wash” is adding complexity when it isn’t really necessary…

[biddibiddibiddibiddi]

Re: Car wash mode

Conveyor-style car wash systems don't usually like it when you put the vehicle in park.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Car wash mode

Allegedly the "car wash mode" is "turn off the windscreen wipers, wind up the windows, don't fold the mirrors, lock the charging cover flap that otherwise opens if something touches it". it'll also include enabling the ability to put the car in free roll (basically Neutral) so you can use car washes

[John Brown (no body)]

Re: Car wash mode

"it'll also include enabling the ability to put the car in free roll (basically Neutral) so you can use car washes"

But what if it's a hand car wash? Or a self-service jet wash? Or those where the car doesn't move, just the washing equipment around it? It might roll away mid-wash :-)

The raincoat, in case I need to get out part way through the wash ------------>

[Christoph]

Elsenet someone pointed out that the Cybertruck has yet to match the sales numbers of the Sinclair C5.

[Howard Sway]

it is a known issue that instead of resetting in the standard two minutes, it takes five hours

Buy a Tesla, become an unpaid Testa.

[Jumbotron64]

Anything by Musk is comedy gold. His solar company has gone to shite. Twitter has gone to shite. My night time viewing has gone to shite due to his shiny happy wagon train Starlink satellites in LEO. His belly flopping (no seriously that’s how it proposes to land on Mars) spacecraft keeps going boom ( sorry…unscheduled dissambly). Tesla is going to shite. And now his idiotic and manifestly fugly Cyberteuck which is utterly a truck version ripoff of the 1980’s stainless steel DeLorian made iconic in the “Back To The Future” movie franchise. And even before this “Car Wash Mode” hilarity go to YouTube and check out how a baseball defeated the bullet proof glass at Cybertruck’s rollout with Musk standing right there. Comedy gold ! Finally…..you know it’s shite when you put the word “Cyber” on it. What is this? 1980s William Gibson “Neuromancer”?

[that one in the corner]

'you know it’s shite when you put the word “Cyber” on it'

Cybermen: deadly, humanoid, controlled by an inhibitor on their emotions (fear, love)

Teslamen: deadly humourless, controlled by an inhibitor that controls their emotions (shame, embarrassment, style, common sense)

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: 'you know it’s shite when you put the word “Cyber” on it'

Cybermen: low paid extras wrapped in tinfoil looking pretty silly even back in the '70s

Cybertruck: ...

[Not Yb]

Re: 'you know it’s shite when you put the word “Cyber” on it'

They looked extremely silly back in the '70s. Walk through any (good) hardware store plumbing department for examples... At least they managed to get to kinda silly in more recent eps.

[Uncle Slacky]

> a truck version ripoff of the 1980’s stainless steel DeLorian

Or a real-life version of the "optimal" design from Car Builder for the Apple ][:

https://bsky.app/profile/drnerdlove.bsky.social/post/3kqft5pfddh2e

[Anonymous Coward]

Forget about landing on Mars. SpaceX will probably have gone titsup before Mars has completed its next orbit around the Sun. If their financial trouble (now we know why no bank wanted to open a credit line with SpaceX and Musk had to conjure up some teen's science fiction fantasy to persuade gullible investors) won't kill them the failure of Starship will. Bloomberg: Musk's Undisclosed Starlink Costs Undercut Profitability Claims.

[Rich 2]

Farcical

"To prevent damage to the exterior, immediately remove corrosive substances (such as grease, oil, bird droppings, tree resin, dead insects, tar spots, road salt, industrial fallout, etc.),"

So, basically, you should wash it every single time you use it? After you’ve enabled “car wash” mode, naturally.

[Jumbotron64]

Re: Farcical

Would I have to put it in Car Wash Mode if I decided just to piss on it ?

[Yes Me]

Re: Farcical

"immediately remove corrosive substances"

[Will Godfrey]

Re: Farcical

Well, Musk is pretty corrosive. Are you suggesting he should be removed?

[werdsmith]

Re: Farcical

Standard on all cars.

[General Purpose]

Industrial fallout

>"To prevent damage to the exterior, immediately remove corrosive substances (such as grease, oil, bird droppings, tree resin, dead insects, tar spots, road salt, industrial fallout ...."

Or simply keep your Cybertruck away from barbecues, mechanics, nature, coastal areas, SpaceX launches ...

[aerogems]

So I guess these things are built for any terrain on any planet, unless that planet happens to have precipitation.

[that one in the corner]

Free trip to Mars for every Cybertruck owner!

(The rest of us will all help you pack for the journey)

[Richard 12]

Or an atmosphere

[El Duderino]

"...and when you've tossed your life savings into a Cybertruck,..."

you're an idiot.

FTFY

[werdsmith]

Re: "...and when you've tossed your life savings into a Cybertruck,..."

Unless you knew you didn't have long left, it wouldn't be so smart to put all your life savings into any car.

[Doctor Syntax]

an $80,000 "paperweight"

To be fair it would hold down an awful lot of paper in that mode.

[Stoneshop]

You sure?

Like it doesn't drive off on its own?

[Jumbotron64]

Until the lithium batteries ignite and the paper that the Cyber paperweight is holding down reaches 451 degrees Fahrenheit.

And Musk will say , “It was a pleasure to burn”

[graeme leggett]

"known issue"

Known internally and definitely not to be mentioned to owners, potential buyers or the general public because of what that would make people think of the product.

Now here's a disturbing thought.

Since such an issue would be embarrassing and addressing it would make much sense, then what known (only unto Tesla) issues are higher priority that fixing the screen reset time hasn't already been fixed?

[Richard 12]

Re: "known issue"

I really cannot understand what it could possibly be doing in that time.

Or why their Test department isn't literally sat on the product manager's desk during those five hours!

Oh, right.

[werdsmith]

Re: "known issue"

I really cannot understand what it could possibly be doing in that time.

Possibly downloading an entire OS image OTA.

[parrot]

Re: "known issue"

Oh it comes with *that* Autopilot? Got stuck on the Enrollment Status Page I expect.

[sarusa]

So much fun

I don't know about you guys, but I LOVE the Sports Futility Vehicle. Seems like not a day goes by without something new and hilarious as the manliest most rugged of incel vehicles for surviving the impending apocalypse breaks down again and can't handle something my bog standard Camry hybrid handles with no problem (like a hill or car wash).

Like one where a guy in Santa Cruz tried to do donuts on the beach, something any pickup or SUV should be able to handle with ease - he managed one and a half circles before his SFV broke down and got stuck. And I'm sure it was totally rusted out by the next week from all that salt.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: So much fun

Toyota is getting hundreds of warranty claims on Hiluxes which appear to have fallen apart from prolonged violent laughing.

Better design sees Subarus with only a little panel damage from sniggering and coughing.

[Mitoo Bobsworth]

Re: So much fun

Borked Futility vehicle in this instance, methinks.

[Groo The Wanderer]

Personally I can't imagine not having to do something with any EV to shut down the heavy duty current that normally flows while you're dowsing the thing with jets of water...

But that's just me. I don't expect to be able to turn a garden hose on my computer while it is running and not have "negative consequences."

[doublelayer]

It strikes me that an item that's supposed to be used outside should be able to handle water without creating an electrical hazard. I suggest keeping the high current stuff away from the part the water hits. If your desktop computer was advertised for outdoor use, it should handle the same.

[VicMortimer]

Just went through a car wash with my plug-in hybrid today. Guess what I didn't have to do?

Cars (other than Turdlas) are designed to handle water.

[werdsmith]

Imagine an electric locomotive taking power from exposed overhead cables whilst heading into a torrential rain shower at 200 km/h.

[seven of five]

Witchcraft!

[John Brown (no body)]

"Personally I can't imagine not having to do something with any EV to shut down the heavy duty current that normally flows while you're dowsing the thing with jets of water..."

So....EVs should not be used in the rain either? Or even after the rain when the roads are wet?

[Jan 0]

Grease?

I know that corrosion of stainless steel is possible, but what kind of "stainless steel" gets corroded by grease?

[Flocke Kroes]

Re: Grease?

The mechanism is called differential aeration. Blocking air from getting to part of a piece of metal creates a very low spec battery. The current from that battery drives corrosion in the area protected from the air.

This is not rocket science. It is covered by some A-level chemistry courses. The work-arounds are thoroughly understood by competent car companies. I expect there are plenty of people at Tesla who understand how to delay corrosion for a decade. Something in the corporate culture musk prevent that knowledge from being applied.

[steelpillow]

Re: Grease?

I think you'll find that the presence of water is part of the A level scenario. Corrosion of this kind can only happen where the adjacent medium is conductive (e.g. wet). Every real engineer will tell you that grease insulates and protects bare metal, as he wipes his hands on his butt before sitting in your collectors' period upholstered armchair.

If grease does genuinely hurt the finish, then I'd suggest that describing this grade of steel as "stainless" is possibly a misnomer.

[Flocke Kroes]

Re: Grease?

Corrosion under grease spots is a big enough problem to fund scientific papers.

Try a web search of stainless steel corrosion. You will get a long list of results. With careful handling stainless is the right choice for some use cases. Exposed car bodywork is not one of them.

[steelpillow]

Re: Grease?

Did you read that paper?!! It's all about galvanised, i.e. zinc-coated steels not stainless alloys, and the long-term effects of dirt in the grease working its way through the zinc coating to the not-stainless-at-all mild steel beneath.

True, stainless steel is only relatively stainless, but if you wash the grease off when the odd vulture poo forces the game, there's no need to lose sleep over it.

Personally I'd take a blowtorch over my Cybertruck, to impart a "jet plane exhaust" sheen to the metalwork, before keeping chickens in it. Musk, ya' listenin'? Tesla Chicken Shacks. Long-life finish, pre-rusted to Mad Max Grade 1, $1,000 extra, Grade 2, $5,000 extra, Grade 3 "Armageddon" with free vulture, $10,000. You'll make more off them that way than selling them as .... trucks, good grief!

[Flocke Kroes]

Re: Grease?

I did a quick search for something to show that grease does not prevent corrosion. With a longer search I might have found something specific to stainless steel but that restriction was not a part of the comment I was replying to. I think the real problem came from the assumption that all greases are perfect insulators.

We have ample evidence from Cyber Truck's user manual that stainless can have corrosion problems with grease spots. In any other car company I would expect this information and other issues with stainless to halt work on the concept long before taking deposits. My expectations from a certain group of companies are much lower. I think you can guess what those companies have in common.

[General Purpose]

Re: Grease?

Old grease marks on stainless steel can be hard to shift. As the Tesla manual indicates, you may need to use "denatured alcohol to remove tar spots and stubborn grease stains"; more generally, several passes with isopropyl alcohol, acetone, or methylated spirit may be needed. (You'll notice those are all solvents - they wouldn't remove corrosion.)

On the other hande, listing grease and oil as "corrosive substances" is quite bizarre and would startle anyone who's spent much time machining or otherwise engineering with stainless steel. On the third hand, most of us here will quite understand that sometimes manual writers don't completely understand what they're talking about.

[steelpillow]

Re: We have ample evidence from Cyber Truck's user manual

Bwahahahahahahahaha! I rest my case.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Grease?

Sounds like a new form of planned obsolescence. It's said that Henry Ford designed the Model T so that everything would wear out at the same time. The first time you take a Model T to the carwash would be the last. Maybe that was Tesla's intention?

[Mike 137]

Re: Grease?

"Something in the corporate culture musk prevent that knowledge from being applied"

Bean counting. 301 stainless is the cheapest and least rustproof alloy by a significant factor.

[Spazturtle]

Re: Grease?

It will create a spot of negative corrosion. As the rest of the steel corrodes from exposure to the atmosphere the spot under the grease will be protected. So then when you eventually remove the grease it will leave a spot of less corroded steel which will look different.

[sedregj]

Compensating

What does Elon drive these days?

[Jumbotron64]

Re: Compensating

A bus for all the children he’s bearing out of wedlock just to populate the Earth with his genius gene pool. Not a joke. He really believes that bullshit. So does his father who recently knocked up his own step-daughter. The Musk family are some genuinely weird Afrikaners.

[The Oncoming Scorn]

Re: Compensating

Obligatory.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9dmoT9AfoI&t=10s

[Bebu]

5 hour boot

Someone got their nested for loops muddled on the second (diagnostic) boot path, one suspects.

[Anonymous IV]

Re: 5 hour boot

Ah! Those happy days where an IBM 360/65 mainframe plus a floor-full of DASD took getting on for two hours to do a complete power-up!

Plenty of time for the rest of the shift operators to drive into town for their McDonald's fixes...

[CowHorseFrog]

Trump going to prison and this story comes out! ?

THeres no way the worlds most brilliant factory dude could get this so wrong.

[CorwinX]

We don't no steenking screens ;-)

The last car I had, till only a couple of years ago, was a five-speed Ford Capri 2.8i Tickford special.

The "engine management system" was a little black box on the bulkhead behind the engine.

A reset was achieved by pulling one of the battery leads for a few minutes then driving for a few miles at varying speeds to zero the measurements.

The only other electronics I require in a car are a CD/Radio.

And the only controls I want are stick, clutch, accelerator and brakes.

Automatics and whizzy screens are for lazy people who can't be bothered to learn to drive properly.

[MachDiamond]

Re: We don't no steenking screens ;-)

I can drive a stick, no problem, but they are a pain in city traffic for an arthritic old man. I've earned an automatic!

My 16yo car just recently got an electronics upgrade in the form of an aftermarket Android head unit that replaced what the factory installed. No more CD player but the iPod plugs in, along with a thumb drive, built in satnav and I've got Torque Pro giving me readouts on what the engine is doing and trip stats. The whole freakin unit cost less than $200 although it did take a couple of days to get installed and software installed and updated. That's pretty much covered what I would consider important to me in a car that was previously lacking. I don't need self-folding wing mirrors, motorized everything that moves, OTA updates, blah blah. I guess I do have OTA updates, but only for the head unit that doesn't affect the operation of the car and I control when, what and where. When I'm not driving, I'm not sitting in the car and when I am, I don't have time for all of the faffery that manufacturers are gluing in. I don't want a car that phones home and hands over records that can be subpoenaed. I don't want the brakes applied for me or the steering diddled that I don't do myself. The only problem I'm having with the car is an unholy fascination the new head unit has with running the AC. Since the controls were part of the old unit, they are replicated in the new unit and it really really likes to blow cold air at me. If I leave the fan on setting one and not turn it off, it doesn't waft cold air in my face. If I could write Mandarin, I would be able to suggest some bug fixes, but alas......

[Anonymous Coward]

Incredible as it is

I really don't believe the description of the Cyber truck in the article itls actually factual as it claims but itf it is the only place for it is a well curated museum. Who seriously can believe the below...

"To prevent damage to the exterior, immediately remove corrosive substances (such as grease, oil, bird droppings, tree resin, dead insects, tar spots, road salt, industrial fallout, etc.),"

[John Brown (no body)]

Re: Incredible as it is

Yes, primarily because "immediate" has a very specific meaning and if anyone tried to go to court over the warranty a judge would have to either throw it out because the driver didn't pull over and clean it "immediately" or rule that bit of the warranty unenforceable.

Most likely it would be settled out of court under an NDA as we all know that big businesses really don't like their contracts/warranties/Ts&Cs actually tested in court.

[Doctor Evil]

On the bright side ...

... this might not actually be a problem for most Tesla Cybertruck owners if they happen to touch the accelerator when they enter the car wash. The residence time inside could be very, very short ...

[Anonymous Coward]

The root problem here is having critical systems on a screen, with no backup system. Can I please just have an actual mirror, instruments that work mechanically and the ability to change things with tactile switches instead of a touch screen?

[Locomotion69]

Boot time 5 hours??? What does it need to do? Get in sync with Earth rotation ?

[CowHorseFrog]

you wuld think the worlds greatest brain, mr musk woudl have rewritten the software by now to be an instant boot.

[osxtra]

TOS

Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball.

[Anonymous Coward]

Reset takes 5 hours instead of expected 2 mins .... sounds like they use the same elastic view of time as macos updates.

[Strahd Ivarius]

But, isn't it to be a trade secret of Microsoft?

[MJI]

Taking the piss

Us owners of 4x4s from the factory near Birmingham love taking the piss out of these.

They get stuck where even soft roaders would escape.

A Subaru road car would manage better in the rough.

Even funnier when they reverse for another run up and end up in the water.

Big piles of junk.

[katrinab]

What about the rain

I'm aware that it isn't road-legal in Scotland, so you wouldn't have to worry about the Scottish rain, but I believe there are parts of the US that get comparable levels of rainfall. What happens if you take it to one of those places? It will get wet there, possibly a similar level of wetness to taking it to a carwash.

[Strahd Ivarius]

Re: What about the rain

And of course, what about Dubai?

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: What about the rain

Went on a road trip to the US in '97. Had to drive through the most epic rainstorm I had ever seen (until then) in New Mexico. Never seen anything like it in the UK, even in Scotland.

Now I am in the tropics in Australia and get weather like that every wet season when the monsoon trough sets in, so the Sports Futility Vehicle would be shit out of luck here as well.

[DwarfPants]

Hollywood Opportunities

In the current climate of money for old rope from Hollywood the CyberTruck is world of possibilities

Cyber Truck don't get it wet or feed it after midnight

Will the aerodynamics let it do 88 miles per hour?

You can probably do a death racer 2024 or Scream holding part of an accelerator pedal in threatening manner

[Snowy]

Brick

Expensive brick sold by an expensive pr**k.

[Anonymous Coward]

Turn your Tesla cyberbrick into a banana hedgehog!

According to this

https://www.eurekalert.org/news-releases/1036935

you can turn your Tesly cybrbrick into a decorative banana hedgehog! cut banana in half, stick electrode in banana, put cut part on brick, apply voltage to the shiny stainless and your electrode.

At least it has a aesthetic value, then.

[anonymous boring coward]

What about car-wash like weather?