back to article World-plus-dog booted out of Facebook, Instagram, Threads

Those trying to log into Meta's Facebook, Instagram, and Threads for their social media fixes are facing panic this morning after being locked out of their accounts. “We’re aware people are having trouble accessing our services. We are working on this now,” Meta spokesperson Andy Stone said in a post on the social media site …

  1. wolfetone Silver badge
    Pint

    The newly unemployed AT&T tech got a new job at Meta I see.

  2. Kevin Johnston

    Hmmm

    Ha ha ha ha ha ha

    ha ha ha

    and productivity improved by 40% once the users tears cleared enough to see their screens

    1. stiine Silver badge
      Facepalm

      Re: Hmmm

      No, it got worse because 800M people kept trying over and over and over.

  3. JWLong

    Those trying to log into Meta's Facebook, Instagram, and Threads............Can't log in........

    Not really a problem in my world.

    0.0.0.0 Facebook, Instagram, X, Twitter, you get the drift.

    Garbage, nothing but garbage I say!

    1. that one in the corner Silver badge

      Re: Those trying to log into Meta's Facebook, Instagram, and Threads............Can't log in........

      > Garbage, nothing but garbage I say!

      I'll agree that Sturgeon's law works overtime for Facebook, but given that volunteer run organisations[1] find it a convenient and accessible way to contact members and disseminate news, without needing to be even vaguely technical, it is allowed to get past the PiHole[2][3]

      [1] techies and commercial organisations have no excuse for using it

      [2] although there sem to be sort of holes in the FB pages, almost as if something is being cut out of them

      [3] PiHole, so good I had to name it twice

  4. Wellyboot Silver badge
    Happy

    Think of all those coffee cup photos going without likes, the lack of positive affirmation will be an existential crisis for meeellions!

    or not.

    1. The Oncoming Scorn Silver badge
      Coat

      Not So Brilliant

      Well that's Midge Ure's day fucked then.

      Icon - Getting me Burberry Mac.

      1. The Dogs Meevonks Silver badge
        Trollface

        Re: Not So Brilliant

        'If I was' going to give a shit about anything... It'd be Midge ure

  5. Huw L-D

    The number of tickets coming in from various marketing departments at clients is a bit of a PITA.

  6. Ikoth
    Black Helicopters

    I've got a tenner...

    ... on DNS.

    And on "super Tuesday" too - where's my tin foil hat?

    1. John Riddoch

      Re: I've got a tenner...

      BGP or DNS are my guesses, but DNS is most likely.

      1. KarMann Silver badge
        Holmes

        Re: I've got a tenner...

        I'll put a twenty on a TLA, then.

      2. Jamesit

        Re: I've got a tenner...

        It's never DNS. :-D

        1. Zibob Silver badge

          Re: I've got a tenner...

          Yeah, couldn't be, its never DNS.

          Who. ould make such changes on a production environment anyway...

      3. J. Cook Silver badge

        Re: I've got a tenner...

        both.jpg

        BGP and DNS are incredibly easy to screw up if you don't know what you are doing.

  7. KarMann Silver badge
    FAIL

    When/where?

    Those trying to log into Meta's Facebook... are facing panic this morning....
    ...wrote someone who's never heard of time zones.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: When/where?

      >> Those trying to log into Meta's Facebook... are facing panic this morning....

      > wrote someone who's never heard of time zones

      Wrote someone who knows full well what time zones the ones who are going to panic over this live in, whilst the rest of the world are content to tut and carry on.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Announced on Twitter

    “We’re aware people are having trouble accessing our services. We are working on this now,” Meta spokesperson Andy Stone said in a post on the social media site formerly known at Twitter.

    except when I try to login to Twitter's website at the moment I get

    Error

    Oops, something went wrong. Please try again later.

    I guess lots of people will just have to do some work today instead

  9. Headley_Grange Silver badge

    Food for thought

    There's a risk that people will starve to death without the motivation to put a picture of their food on Instagram.

    1. Arthur the cat Silver badge
      Trollface

      Re: Food for thought

      There's a risk that people will starve to death without the motivation to put a picture of their food on Instagram.

      It's a well known scientific fact that food has no calories unless photographed and put on social media.

      1. Dostoevsky Bronze badge

        Re: Food for thought

        "Who'ld'a thought cutting social media could be a weight loss program!?"

      2. jmch Silver badge
        Trollface

        Re: Food for thought

        "It's a well known scientific fact that food has no calories unless photographed and put on social media."

        So it follows that a large majority of Register readers are underweight??

        1. The Dogs Meevonks Silver badge
          Trollface

          Re: Food for thought

          Only the ones who live in their mom's basements.

          1. David 132 Silver badge
            Coffee/keyboard

            Re: Food for thought

            It’s not a basement, it’s a COMMAND CENTRE!

  10. Tron Silver badge

    'Link', not 'Nexus'.

    Twats.

    1. Zibob Silver badge

      Re: 'Link', not 'Nexus'.

      Hey. Someone was paid good money to rul that jargon up the flagpole of the world of corpo/pol world.

  11. breakfast

    Past their peak

    It's a good attempt but Facebook falling over will never be funnier than when their authentication went down globally and they used that to identify their engineers so nobody could log in to fix it or access any of their datacentres because that was also tied to their Facebook ID. Taking angle grinders to their own facilities was such a funny thing for them to have to do.

    1. cookieMonster Silver badge
      Facepalm

      Re: Past their peak

      Yeah, that one made laugh.

    2. jonfr

      Re: Past their peak

      That's going to happen again. Cascading failures are fun to watch spreading. Since it stops everything in a network including the hardware. It didn't happen today, but complexity of those network structures means that one day, this is going to happen and then they might have to rebuild the whole thing from ground up.

    3. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

      Re: Past their peak

      Just wait until it happens to "Sign in with Google" too!

  12. UncleCranky
    Facepalm

    Bullshit. I STILL can't log on, even with log-in codes. The damned thing is broken for good.

    1. Kevin Johnston

      Correct, if it is broken that is for the good of humanity

      1. spold Silver badge

        ...millions suffer in having to face "actual reality" horror situation.

        The fix is now to classify them as "anti-social networking platforms" as you can't talk to anyone.

        1. Version 1.0 Silver badge
          Happy

          I don't suffer, I'm actually quite content with the zero-social media environment created for me by Facebook. I was setting up an account when Facebook started to accommodate everyone, not just students. I was using my English birth names while talking to someone in New York and I was told that if I ever tried to create an account with Facebook then I would be prosecuted ... I was told that my English family name was fake. And then several new social-media applications originally asked me if I had ever been banned - as an English guy working in America any legal issues could have forced an exit.

          I'm so happy these days that I have absolutely no social media accounts ... So I have never been risking a Facebook prosecution.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            My name is Lady. I tried to create a Facebook account and was declined. The response was that I had to use the name my friends call me by.

            My friends call me... Lady.

            Because that's my name.

            1. Bandikoto

              But are you a Lady?

            2. Sceptic Tank Silver badge
              Windows

              Missing Fingers Fan Club

              Your friends wouldn't happen to go by names like The Tramp, and such?

            3. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

              Look, you may think your name is "Lady". Your family and friends might think so. The government might think so.

              But Facebook developers know better. At Meta, if the code disagrees with the universe, the universe is wrong.

          2. Zack Mollusc

            They have a point...

            1.0 is a very unusual family name. It is not all that surprising that they thought you were a bot.

            1. petef

              Re: They have a point...

              Earlier this morning they let me register with my surname of '); DROP TABLE Students;--

              1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

                Re: They have a point...

                Are you my uncle?

    2. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

      I STILL can't log on, even with log-in codes

      Scott Aaronson posted something similar on his blog.

      To his credit, he admitted this might prove to be to his benefit.

      I do understand people using social media to stay in touch with family and friends. Multicast media is certainly more efficient than point-to-point; it's hard to stay in regular contact with even a fairly small group by mail / email / voice / SMS / and so on. I also admit I just don't stay in regular contact with more than a few people, because I can't bear to use social media, and I don't make that effort to keep up those point-to-point lines of communication.

      But people who follow casual acquaintances, strangers, companies... it's hard to see how that's not toxic. Even someone like Zvi Mowshowitz, whom I regard as a serious and respectable thinker (even if I often disagree with him), and who clearly gets a lot of information which feeds into his own work from Twitter, does not, in my opinion, make a good argument for using social media extensively. I'm just not convinced that it's a particularly useful source of news and other information, however carefully curated. I have never yet seen anything reported where I thought "I wish I'd seen that a couple of hours earlier on Twitter!".

  13. Someone Else Silver badge

    From the sub-head:

    Those trying to log into Meta's Facebook, Instagram, and Threads for their social media fixes are facing panic this morning after being locked out of their accounts.

    Hello travelers. Welcome back to Reality. That blinding light you see is called the Sun; in limited quantities it is not dangerous and can result in seeing things clearly (once your eyes adjust...). Those tremors you're experiencing will subside in due time. Oh, and those other things you see moving around are called "people". With a few exceptions, the tend to be sociable, and can be engaged with using a simple construct called "conversation". It may take some practice reviving this lost skill, but you'll be surprised at how quickly you'll remember. Enjoy the rest of your day.

    1. David 132 Silver badge

      Do they have U=BTL crudely lasered into their arms?

      (Red Dwarf reference, in case it’s too subtle)

      1. The Dogs Meevonks Silver badge

        Here in Bedford Falls, we don't have social media, every one is friendly and kind.

        1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge
    2. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

      That sounds like the pod opening scene of The Matrix :-)

  14. chivo243 Silver badge
    Trollface

    damn, damn, damn

    Further update

    All services now appears to be coming back online.

    "We are recovering from an earlier outage impacting Facebook Login, and services are in the process of being restored. We apologize for any inconvenience that this may have caused," Meta said at 0907 PT.

    and double damn!

  15. Number6

    My first thought was that the browser had lost its cookies. Then the login attempt failed and I wondered which of my recent posts had earned me a ban.

    My cat was highly offended that I couldn't upload all the latest photos of him.

  16. Zack Mollusc

    Why login to Meta?

    Why is it necessary to log in to Meta? I thought they were surveillancey capitalisming everybody? Surely they know who is accessing their systems?

    1. yetanotheraoc Silver badge

      Re: Why login to Meta?

      It's to signify you're okay with the surveillance, naturally.

      1. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

        Re: Why login to Meta?

        And the only way they have plausible deniability when someone takes over your account.

  17. Winkypop Silver badge

    And for just a short period of space time

    Humanity, as a whole, gained an imperceptible amount of intelligence and evolutionary advantage.

    Alas, it was not to last.

    1. The Dogs Meevonks Silver badge

      Re: And for just a short period of space time

      Think of the stupidest person you know... then realise that 50% of people are stupider than that.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: And for just a short period of space time

        > Think of the stupidest person you know... then realise that 50% of people are stupider than that.

        That - really isn't how statistics works.

        You Bell Curve may need tuning.

        1. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

          Re: And for just a short period of space time

          "Think of the stupidest person you know. Then realize that quantifying 'stupidity' as a single-dimensional variable is something only a stupid person would do."

        2. The Dogs Meevonks Silver badge
          Trollface

          Re: And for just a short period of space time

          Woosh!... that's the sound of the George Carlin line going over yours and everyone else's head.

          Also.. I assume you meant 'your' and not 'you'... unless you were trying to say 'you bellend' instead of bell curve

        3. WineInABox
          Thumb Up

          Re: And for just a short period of space time

          'Your Bell Curve may need tuning,' is being stolen now.

      2. Sceptic Tank Silver badge
        Pint

        Re: And for just a short period of space time

        Thanks for the demonstration.

  18. Jim Whitaker
    1. David 132 Silver badge

      Yes. Filed here under “news I have a hard time giving a shit about”.

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