back to article The week in weird: Check out the strangest CES tech of 2024

Ah, January: The start of a new year, crisp winter weather (if you live in the northern hemisphere, at least) and CES, with the latter giving us a look at what's in store from the biggest names in tech. Of course, no CES would be complete without an exhibit hall filled with startups pitching their innovations. As always, some …

  1. Gene Cash Silver badge

    Skwheel

    So, um, isn't that basically rollerblades BUT ELECTRIC? And my reason for using rollerblades was exercise, so... hm.

    I don't see why it doesn't have AI, though! They're missing the bus!

    1. HuBo Silver badge
      Happy

      Re: Skwheel

      Screw the bus ... at 80 kph you can skwheel right past it, no sweat. Then again, for extra thrills, use them in the bus, for a 130 kph total speed experience. The kids will love it!

    2. elsergiovolador Silver badge

      Re: Skwheel

      People exercise in The Sims these days.

      Also don't forget storing your rides in the blockchain.

    3. M.V. Lipvig Silver badge

      Re: Skwheel

      If they use Elon AI, they won't be missing any buses. Or emergency vehicles. Or small children

  2. spold Silver badge

    Wehead, a bizarre head-shaped version of Alexa

    ...c'mon it obviously sucks.

    1. Montreal Sean

      Re: Wehead, a bizarre head-shaped version of Alexa

      For almost $5000 USD I would have expected it to look more head-like, not like some weird sculpture...

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Wehead, a bizarre head-shaped version of Alexa

      >...c'mon it obviously sucks.

      But they said that hole was for cooling.

      1. Sceptic Tank Silver badge
        Pint

        Re: Wehead, a bizarre head-shaped version of Alexa

        Horizontal display for a face picture. Vertical display for a partial pr0n picture. The future is here.

    3. TheFifth

      Re: Wehead, a bizarre head-shaped version of Alexa

      A pre-production unit was reviewed on Short Circuit (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KDS5Re6RW0s).

      I assume it'll become more bespoke, but the unit they had was just four Samsung Galaxy phones mushed together with an HP bluetooth speaker.

  3. M.V. Lipvig Silver badge

    The cat flapper was neat

    But I figure it won't be long before the cat figures out that all he has to do is approach frombthebside, drop the prey, and bat it to the flap. Then walk to the flap, listen for the click, then pick up the mouse and go. Cats are smart, and can figure stuff out. My own have figured out light switches, doors (thankfully they can't actually pull the handle open) and water faucets, and I have one that keeps trying to manipulate things with her paw as though she had a thumb. She knows what the problem is, no thumb, but she keeps trying to find a way.

    That rabbit phone interface, bad idea. I see that quickly becoming a Hoover, and perhaps a spambot. Hope the security is tight, since you'll be giving it unfettered access to your phone. Think I'll pass.

    1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

      Re: The cat flapper was neat

      "That rabbit phone interface, bad idea. I see that quickly becoming a Hoover, and perhaps a spambot. Hope the security is tight, since you'll be giving it unfettered access to your phone. Think I'll pass."

      They may have to find a new name for it anywhere where Hutinson still owns[*] the trademark right to Rabbit in the telecomms field.

      * They may not. Apparently they may never have actually owned the trademark, at least not outright

  4. sorry, what?

    Getting in a Flappie, or not

    Personally, I think this is a great idea. Indeed, when I first saw a post about a chap who had done this for himself I was impressed.

    Keeping cats locked in the house is a very American thing, and something I think is cruel. Having cats locally manage the rodent population is actually a benefit, until they want to come spread the intestines on you lounge carpet or rug as a sign of affection.

    Allowing them to behave naturally while stopping them making such a mess in the house is a brilliant idea.

    If you think it better to make your cat a house cat to avoid the cost of this device, feel free to not have a cat instead.

    1. xyz Silver badge

      Re: Getting in a Flappie, or not

      I'm from the "kill 'em, kill 'em all" brigade. I'd buy one if it came with a guillotine rather than a flap.

      :-)

    2. Philo T Farnsworth Bronze badge

      Re: Getting in a Flappie, or not

      Regarding keeping cats indoors, one word: coyotes.

      I happen to live in southern California, in the San Diego area, and we have lots of coyotes, which are known to regularly make a snack of "outdoor" cats.

      As far as cruelty goes, our cats, both adopted from shelters, can expect to live long, well cared for lives. I haven't heard any complaints (except with the litter box is full or the food dish is empty).

      Your mileage may vary.

      1. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

        Re: Getting in a Flappie, or not

        Yes, I'd like to see a citation for that "keeping cats indoors is cruel" claim. I call bullshit.

        While the best study I've found so far finds no statistically-significant difference in FeLV occurrence or age of mortality for indoor/outdoor versus indoor-only cats (outdoor-only cats are at significantly higher risk for both), contradicting the common wisdom that indoor-only cats are "healthier" in some respect or that indoor-only cats generally live longer. But indoor-only cats get in fewer fights — with other cats, with dogs, with other local wildlife such as raccoons — and as Philo notes, don't have to worry about predators such as coyotes or whatever else might be in your area.

        There are a lot of feral cats around here. Many don't last more than a year.

        As the article in my second link discusses, indoor-only cats generally get less exercise than indoor/outdoor or outdoor-only cats, and need opportunities for exercise if they're to get a healthy amount. Those can be provided indoors. Of the various indoor-only cats we've had over the years, most have stayed in a normal weight range; only a couple have been overweight, and none excessively so.

    3. imanidiot Silver badge

      Re: Getting in a Flappie, or not

      The big problem is that cats tend to not stick to only rodents. They'll go after birds too. Lots of birds. Like lots and lots and lots of birds.

      I have no problem with people in rural areas keeping a few farm cats, usually they indeed have enough rodents to keep the cats busy and entertained. People in (sub-)urban areas? Keep your murdering shit machine indoors. If you want to let it out of the house, leash train it and take it out for a walk regularly. I've found far too many dead birds, chicks and disturbed birds nests (of multiple species already struggling and/or endangered) obviously taken out by a cat.

    4. Sceptic Tank Silver badge
      Pirate

      Re: Getting in a Flappie, or not

      Do try to keep your cats inside. Your neighbours will appreciate that.

  5. Yorick Hunt Silver badge

    Privacy...

    Nice to see they're doing the AI processing locally to protect felines' privacy... Shame nobody thought to offer such niceties to humans.

    Although... I wouldn't put it past Zuck to launch "Pawbook" or something similar if he can sniff the scent of marketing to quadrupeds.

  6. Arthur the cat Silver badge

    Skwheels … can be used both on and off road

    In theory on road use would be illegal in the UK. In practice, given that sod all is done about electric scooters on the road, just go ahead and break your ankle in a pothole.

    1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

      Re: Skwheels … can be used both on and off road

      I thought that too. But just the other day i saw copper "having a word" with someone using a privately owned escooter. The upshot, from what I could hear, was more of advice and a warning before he drove off. The scooter owner then pushed the escooter for a about 10 yards till the cop was out of sight and then hopped on and sped off!

      So not quite "sod all", but near as makes no difference.

  7. Steve Aubrey
    FAIL

    A square meter of air

    . . . and one molecule thick?

    1. Daniel Pfeiffer
      Headmaster

      Re: A square meter of air

      Woah there, you're going over the top! Molecules are clearly three dimensional, where m² are not. 1 m² of air clearly means 0 m³, i.e. zilch. Which is apparently a lot more than 0.25 m² even though that is also 0 m³.

      If this were graphene, instead of air, we might let it pass. Even that has a minimal thickness, but the interesting size is it's surface on one side.

    2. imanidiot Silver badge

      Re: A square meter of air

      Since no maximum height is specified and they're not talking volume, I think practically we should be assuming roughly up to the Karman line (100km). So all we need to do to solve the carbon problem is put one of those devices in every square meter and we'll have the atmosphere cleaned lickitysplit.

  8. Sceptic Tank Silver badge
    Stop

    Send in the clowns

    Those skwheels look a little bit like clown shoes to me. The headlights also don't look like you'll be able to see anything in front of you until it's right in front of you. Factory limited to 25km/h; that can't be good if you want to outrun a mob that want to injure you for looking like a doofus.

    1. DJ
      Coat

      Re: Send in the clowns

      I'm pretty sure I saw those some time ago, under the Acme brand, and strapped to a rather unfortunate coyote.

      (Mine's the one with the Looney Tunes logo.)

  9. Triggerfish

    Mossair

    £600 ffing quid for a terrarium you could make for about 40.

    Im in the wrong game.

  10. Evil Scot Bronze badge
    Coat

    AI infused connected device called rabbit.

    Mr Stross predicted how that would go.

    Mine is the dirty raincoat... Because investigator of cyber crimes... Obvs.

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