back to article Missing tomatoes ketchup with ISS crew after almost a year lost in space

There is good news and bad news regarding the two tomatoes lost aboard the International Space Station (ISS) last year. The good news is that they've been found. The bad news is that they look less than appetizing. NASA astronaut Frank Rubio lost track of the fruits after harvesting them from the eXposted Root On-Orbit Test …

  1. cookieMonster Silver badge
    Joke

    they were discarded

    NASA speak for “we used them to plug holes in the Russian module”

    1. David 132 Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: they were discarded

      "...thereby upgrading its structural integrity and build-quality considerably."

    2. Mike 137 Silver badge

      Re: they were discarded

      Or maybe in a few million years some extra-terrestrial explorer will find them floating through the void and create a scientific theory about a ketchup planet somewhere 'far far away'.

      1. HuBo Silver badge
        Pint

        Re: they were discarded

        Or maybe, in this same few million years, while Frank Rubio is in stasis on this very space ship, their descendants will evolve into a humanoid form named Tom, with plump and juicy red skin instead of cat fangs. The Toms will revere "The holy solanum mother, saved by Firank the Doofus, who was frozen in time, ... and shall returneth to lead us to the promised soil"!

        1. mtp

          Re: they were discarded

          Who gets to be the hologram - is there anyone the ISS called Arnold?

    3. Kane
      Joke

      Re: they were discarded

      That's because I blew it out of the goddamn airlock!

      1. Bebu
        Windows

        Re: they were discarded

        Actually what do they do with 'waste' if they don't bring it back to Earth?

        Pretty obvious its not shot out the airlock at least not without Rimmer's assistance. Who would want their sputnik coated with the brown stuff?

        All I can imagine is that the waste is stored aboard the space station awaiting the station's eventual planned de-orbit when all the hoarded crap will rain down over our heads.

  2. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge

    Ketchup in Space

    + Pigs in Space

    Is there Sausages on the ISS menu?

    1. HuBo Silver badge
      Happy

      Re: Ketchup in Space

      Only the finest in astronomic gastronomy: pigs in a blanket or toad in the hole, with spicy space ketchup!

      1. CrazyOldCatMan Silver badge

        Re: Ketchup in Space

        pigs in a blanket or toad in the hole

        I have a recipe for a pigs-in-blankets toad in the hole.. Best of both worlds! With sriracha ketchup.

  3. Michael Strorm Silver badge

    Don't know if anyone else got this (misleading) impression from the title, but...

    I read it and imagined some tomatoes having escaped an experiment and floated off into space (à la that toolbag a few weeks back) only to "catch up" with it on a future orbit.

    Maybe they were outside being tested for exposure to space? Sounds weird, and how likely is it that they'd bother to catch the tomatoes even if they did come within reach of the ISS agai...

    Oh, *okay*, now that I've read the story it's much clearer. Not so much "lost in space" as "fallen behind a radiator".

    Which is definitely more plausible, but sadly, nowhere near as interesting as someone hovering around the outside of the ISS getting unexpectedly splatted with a rotten space tomato.

    1. FIA Silver badge

      Re: Don't know if anyone else got this (misleading) impression from the title, but...

      Yes, I too assumed there'd been a dull wet slap, and a bored astronaut going 'Oh... there they are...'

  4. Mister Dubious
    Trollface

    Musical Memories

    Can't help thinking of the greatest movie theme song EVER:

    Attack of the killer tomatoes!

    Attack of the killer tomatoes!

    They'll beat you, bash you,

    Squish you, smash you,

    Chew you up for brunch,

    And finish you off for dinner or lunch!

    (... and there's MORE WHERE THAT CAME FROM! Mwaa-haa-haaaa!)

    1. Jellied Eel Silver badge

      Re: Musical Memories

      I was just thinking about how that classic movie may have been oddly prophetic. It all began with an escaped breeding pair of tomatoes, and who will be our Mason Dixon, and save humanity?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Musical Memories

        Save humanity? Mason Dixon?

        You have to draw a line and not cross it, Earth doesn't need to keep suffering.

    2. CrazyOldCatMan Silver badge

      Re: Musical Memories

      Pah. Your feral tomatoes would be hogweed-haired to death by my Giant Hogweed.

      Botanical creature stirs, seeking revenge

      Royal beast did not forget

      Soon they escaped, spreading their seed

      Preparing for an onslaught, threatening the human race

      Mighty Hogweed is avenged

      Human bodies soon will know our anger

      Kill them with your Hogweed hairs

      Heracleum mantegazziani!

  5. Ghostman

    Sonny Carter took Finchers Bar-b-Que on a mission. The sandwich was no problem, but the Brunswick Stew had to be thickened so it would stay in the cup.

    https://www.finchersbbqga.net

    Check out the menu. One of the old locations was only a mile from where we lived when I was a kid. If the wind was right, you could smell the meat being smoked overnight. Back then we slept with the windows open (note: before a/c)

    1. FIA Silver badge

      Please don't post such alluring pornography!

      Especially not porn that would require me to travel over 2000 miles.

      Damnit, now I'm hungry....

      Check out the menu.

      NO! That just makes it worse!

  6. bertkaye

    episode 1 Attack of the Mutant Celestopods

    In the middle of the night the mutant tomatoes silently extricated themselves from the sample cabinet and went on the prowl. The next morning a technician found the night guard drained of blood and with a look of terror on his petrified face. Shortly thereafter a loud sound was heard and a blue box materialized in the space lab room.

    "Have a jelly baby?" a tall man with a scarf offered to the astonished technician. "They're very good."

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Pips….In….Spaaaaaaace!

    OK, tomatoes have seeds, I know.

    1. Korev Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: Pips….In….Spaaaaaaace!

      A seedy comment...

      1. Anonymous Coward Silver badge
        Coat

        Re: Pips….In….Spaaaaaaace!

        ... with a kernel of truth

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Seen it

    Reminds me of the Toys in the Attic episode from Cowboy Bebop.

  9. ThatOne Silver badge
    WTF?

    Say what?

    Lose tomatoes in a spaceship.

    Just when I thought this world couldn't get any stranger...

  10. xyz123 Silver badge

    Subway have said those tomatoes are perfectly fine and could be used in their footlong sandwiches as they're actually LESS rotted and nasty than Subway's own "fresh" version.....

    1. Jellied Eel Silver badge

      Subway have said those tomatoes are perfectly fine and could be used in their footlong sandwiches as they're actually LESS rotted and nasty than Subway's own "fresh" version.....

      Apparently there's quite the bidding war between Subway, McD and BK for these rare specimens. Also guessing there's still scientific value in it, ie studying how stuff decays in space.

      1. Jimmy2Cows Silver badge

        I'd imagine the ISS air is so filtered and sterilised there are practically no mould spores or bacteria floating about to contaminate the tomatoes, so they'd just slowly desiccate.

  11. IceC0ld

    [quote]eXposted Root On-Orbit Test System (XROOTS, because NASA loves a tortured backronym even more than we at El Reg)[/quote]

    tortured backronym's :o)

    so here we go again, with the El Reg special - TITSUP

    T - omatoes

    I - nsist

    T - hey

    S - tay

    U - nusually

    P - ackaged

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "Dark Star" demonstrated the dangers of tomatoes on the loose in a spaceship years ago!

  13. Sceptic Tank Silver badge
    Angel

    tomato + rocket = space salad

    How many of these radiation hardened tomatoes would I require if I wanted to turn the moon into a pizza pie? (That's amore...)

  14. spold Silver badge

    Ground control to missing Toms

    ....here they are floating in a tin can, far above my spoon...

  15. Chris Evans

    The missing poo?

    They look brown to me, maybe they are the missing poo.

    "ASTRONAUT Tim Peake was warned about a poo on the loose in the zero-gravity International Space Station.

    He was part of a crew ordered to “keep an eye out” for the missing floater."

    https://www.thesun.co.uk/tech/24689062/brit-astronaut-tim-peake-poo-international-space-station/

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