back to article Neighbors angry as another North Korean 'satellite' launch attempt fails

North Korea's Thursday attempt to launch a "military reconnaissance satellite" failed, state media has reported. The launch occured out of Sohae Satellite Launching Ground in Cholsan County of North Phyongan Province around 04:00 on Thursday, local time. "The flights of the first and second stages of the rocket were normal, …

  1. Wellyboot Silver badge
    Holmes

    Quelle surprise

    Did it hit fail exactly where they aimed predicted?

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: Quelle surprise

      Direct hit on Ocean, medals all round

  2. Pascal Monett Silver badge

    So it blew up ?

    The article is not very clear on the end result. I'm guessing rapid unscheduled disassembly.

    And where did the remains fall down ? The Yellow Sea ?

    And are we sure that there was no flying laser in the vicinity ? That unexpected 3rd-stage snafu could very well have been the result of a bit of coherent light interference with the 3rd stage envelope, no ?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: So it blew up ?

      Lasers capable of bringing down a missile are very difficult to engineer, requiring a combination of extremely well controlled beam direction, pattern, coherence and focus, and at the same time not melting any vital part of itself.

      We'll know when someone has fielded a laser capable of this, because it's such a big technical achievement.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: So it blew up ?

        The floating shark corpses would be a give away as well.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: So it blew up ?

          >> flying laser in the vicinity

          > floating shark corpses

          Shades of Sharknado!

  3. Jason Bloomberg Silver badge
    Mushroom

    "It turned out that May 2023 "reconnaissance satellite" had no military utility for spying"

    That was a very carefully worded conclusion. From what I recall it was carrying a satellite, which contained optical equipment, but would be considered crap by modern military standards and requirements outside of North Korea.

    It seems a lot of effort to go to in providing plausible deniability should a ballistic missile test fail and it fell into enemy hands.

    I'm not convinced by South Korean claims that it was merely a ballistic missile test, that the payload proves it was just that. But it's hard to blame them for taking the opportunity to demonise North Korea given they, and others, do see them as an existential threat.

    1. Snake Silver badge

      It is always amazing that a small, authoritarian state like North Korea believes that they have such a great level of impending need for military reconnaissance, spending billions on a device capable of monitoring multiple nations worldwide, whilst they [continuously] can't reliably feed their own people.

      ah-hem, note that this can be said of many nation-states in today's world...

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Imagine a country that spent >$1tn on defence and had teachers and nurses using foodbanks and people dieing because they couldn't afford insulin

      2. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

        Siege mentality.

    2. cornetman Silver badge

      > But it's hard to blame them for taking the opportunity to demonise North Korea given they, and others, do see them as an existential threat.

      And, historically, not without very good reason. North Korea *still* view South Korea as the "bit that got away".

      They are still technically at war.

  4. Mishak Silver badge

    "the launch contravened UN resolutions"

    UN resolutions have no real power, so why do people keep going on about them?

    1. DishonestQuill

      Re: "the launch contravened UN resolutions"

      I assume because the UN is meant to be a neutral arbiter. Whether or not it actually is neutral seems debatable.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: "the launch contravened UN resolutions"

        North Korea is at war with the United Nations, so definitely not neutral.

      2. jmch Silver badge
        Happy

        Re: "the launch contravened UN resolutions"

        "Whether or not it actually is neutral seems debatable"

        I don't follow events enough to determine if UN actually is neutral, but the fact that the US is pissed off at the UN is a good indicator that it is, in fact, quite neutral

    2. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: "the launch contravened UN resolutions"

      UN resolutions are improving, they hope to get to 1920x1080 soon

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Nominative determinism strikes again

    "So, what have achieved today, NADA?"

    1. Mishak Silver badge

      If only

      Unfortunately, they are getting closer and closer to being able to hit anywhere with a nuke (even if it is only "low yield").

  6. Winkypop Silver badge
    Devil

    Rocket Boy on the phone sir

    Wants to know if you have any “not documents” about rockets in the basement near the swimming pool.

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