back to article Boris Johnson pleads ignorance, which just might work

Former UK prime minister Boris Johnson lobbed a wrench into the works of the country's COVID-19 inquiry by claiming he couldn't remember the passcode to unlock an old phone being sought by investigators. The inquiry has been seeking the device because it's believed to contain a trove of WhatsApp messages from the early days of …

  1. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge
    Facepalm

    The dog ate it

    Boris MISSED the opportunity to have used the old standby of school kids and to have got rid of the sim card and blamed it on the dog

    https://www.countryliving.com/uk/wildlife/pets/a35286193/boris-johnson-dog/

    Talking of school, his housemaster got a measure of the character SPOT-ON, all those years ago

    https://www.thelondoneconomic.com/news/letter-to-boris-johnsons-dad-from-eton-college-resurfaces-online-and-it-explains-a-lot-126486/

    1. DS999 Silver badge

      Re: The dog ate it

      What possible effect would a missing SIM card have on his claimed inability to remember the passcode to the phone?

      1. LogicGate Silver badge

        Re: The dog ate it

        At least he did not "accidentally" drop the phone in the toilet..

        1. Paul Crawford Silver badge

          Re: The dog ate it

          Or off a ferry...

          1. LogicGate Silver badge

            Re: The dog ate it

            You would never see Boris on a ferry. Ferries are for "other people" (unless there is some kind of a PR-event going on). Limousine with driver, Helicopter or Businessjet. In an emergency, he will slum it on first class on an airliner.

            1. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge

              Re: The dog ate it

              He was forced[photo opportunity/press tipped off] to slum-it out on Economy last October when he said he was "up for it", to stand for leader after Truss lost time to a lettuce.

              There is also the time he was returning from a weekend of partying at the Italian castle of his Russian friend, going there after leaving behind his security escort, when he was Foreign Secretary. Apparently, the hosts would push the red carpet out on the way in, like private jets, but the return trip would be a bit rougher, to drive home who is providing the hospitality

              1. LogicGate Silver badge

                Re: The dog ate it

                oh yes.. and superyacht.. Thank you for reminding me!

                no wonder the poor man could not possibly live off a measly 150 k / year...

            2. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge

              Re: The dog ate it

              Ideally with someone else picking up the tab for travel and subsistence

              1. LogicGate Silver badge

                Re: The dog ate it

                One must make ends meet :)

            3. Catkin Silver badge

              Re: The dog ate it

              Don't forget those elitist, stuck up bicycles rather than walking like the plebs.

          2. WonkoTheSane

            Re: The dog ate it

            Off the Commons patio straight into the Thames more like.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: The dog ate it

          Won't work with phones that are waterproof..

      2. Charlie Clark Silver badge

        Re: The dog ate it

        Depends a bit on the app. Signal detects a change of SIM card and will wipe existing messages even for the same phone number. However, BoJo had lackeys for that sort of thing and will have had to hand over his passcode in order to continue to do any kind of government business with the phone.

    2. katrinab Silver badge
      Boffin

      Re: The dog ate it

      I'm pretty sure the process of turning on the phone securely would include removing the SIM card and charging it up inside a Faraday cage?

      Allowing the phone to connect to the internet could cause old messages to be wiped.

    3. Blackjack Silver badge

      Re: The dog ate it

      Actually he could have throw it into a full bathtub and then "send it for recycling".

      But then again that would have been smart.

  2. Flocke Kroes Silver badge

    Forgotten phlebotinum

    The Regulation of Investigatory Powers Act 2000 s.49 and s.53 make it a criminal offence with a penalty of two years in prison to fail to disclose when requested the key to any encrypted information.

    Forgetting a password, never knowing what it was or having a file of random numbers that the police believe is encrypted information is punishable by two years in prison, unless it could be CSAM - in which case the limit is 5 years. We have this awful law but for some reason it is applied selectively.

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: Forgotten phlebotinum

      Unless the judge believes he is lying about forgetting it - then it's contempt of court and he goes to jail until he decides to remember it

      1. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge
        Coat

        Lock him Up!

        Unless the judge believes he is lying about forgetting it - then it's contempt of court and he goes to jail until he decides to remember it

        To use a phrase used by Boris' orange hued friend from Florida...

        "Lock her[him] up!"

    2. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: Forgotten phlebotinum

      >or having a file of random numbers that the police believe is encrypted information is punishable by two years in prison

      But when the Police came to give a talk to our university and we asked about storing data from our experiments, with a SNR indistinguishable from random, we were told not to be silly because these laws would only be used against terrorists

      1. Flocke Kroes Silver badge

        Re: Source of legal advice

        Getting legal advice for the police is only a small step up from listening to some random fool on the internet. The law could have been written with restrictions but it wasn't so of course it was used for more than was 'promised'. Please get your advice from a proper lawyer.

        I would also like to ask people to not vote for parties that give us open ended laws but the OMRLP does not stand in every constituency and if they ever got into power I am sure they would quickly become just like the others.

        1. This post has been deleted by its author

          1. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge
            Holmes

            Re: Source of legal advice

            With the calibre of "law makers" we have at Westminster...

            "We", the "Great British Public" are the ones who put them there, so, a case of reap what you sow.

          2. NeilPost

            Re: Source of legal advice

            .. or wilfully lying about some things. ‘Speed cameras on motorways are always active’ for example.

        2. NeilPost

          Re: Source of legal advice

          A key tenet of UK Law, is it is supposed to be applied without fear or favour, and fairly. Not just for certain groups or people - that is conscious bias.

          Just applying badly drafted legislation ‘just to terrorists’ will help get it thrown out when it is wielded in anger.

          BoJo - https://www.cps.gov.uk/legal-guidance/misconduct-public-office however.

      2. Kurgan

        Re: Forgotten phlebotinum

        Until someone decides that you are a terrorist, of course.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          eyes too close together

          It's an unmistakable marker of terrorist conspirators

          1. zuckzuckgo

            Re: eyes too close together

            Or too far apart, or too precisely in the "right" place.

          2. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: eyes too close together

            Like how the Police had to destroy DNA of innocent people

            Except for an exemption for Persons-of-Interest to the Police

            And requesting that they destroy your data makes you a Person-of-Interest

    3. Kurgan

      Re: Forgotten phlebotinum

      "FOR SOME REASON" law never applies to some people.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Forgotten phlebotinum

      unfortunately (I THINK) it's only in some obscure cases, on grounds of 'national security', or 'public interest' or such. Who decides which grounds and interests are which? I don't expect anyone to bite the hand that feeds it.

    5. Jason Bloomberg Silver badge

      Re: Forgotten phlebotinum

      The Regulation of Investigatory Powers Act 2000 s.49 and s.53 make it a criminal offence with a penalty of two years in prison to fail to disclose when requested the key to any encrypted information.

      That it does is no good reason to accept its legitimacy.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    xkcd told me that passcodes can be remembered with a rubber hose.

    1. Paul Crawford Silver badge

      I think many would pay to see Boris being "helped" to remember. Could even be a double-billing with Musk v Zuck cage fight.

    2. FrogsAndChips Silver badge

      I thought it was a $5 wrench but we may be thinking of different comics.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Like Boris, my memory is faulty.

        1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

          I'm prepared to kick in $5 for the wrench

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Boris pleads ignorance

    I hope he did it using Latin.

    Even a fool sounds intelligent that way.

    Anyway, it worked when asked how many kids he had.

    1. Arthur the cat Silver badge

      Re: Boris pleads ignorance

      I hope he did it using Latin. Even a fool sounds intelligent that way.

      Quidquid latine dictum sit altum videtur.

    2. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

      Re: Boris pleads ignorance

      i ii iii iv

      1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

        Re: Boris pleads ignorance

        That's the sort of code an idiot would have on his luggage !

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Boris pleads ignorance

          So definitely one that Boris would use then..

  5. Pete 2 Silver badge

    A right little pleader

    > Boris Johnson pleads ignorance, which just might work

    If he pled insanity, that would be more believable.

    1. Bebu
      Windows

      Re: A right little pleader

      《> Boris Johnson pleads ignorance, which just might work

      If he pled insanity, that would be more believable》

      As a bonus could have the bugger sectioned (or whatever you call it in the UK)

      Don't you have a place (Broadmoor?) where you place the seriously dangerous loonies?

      I suspect the cabinet and most of the govt would benefit from such a (re)accomodation.

      1. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge

        Re: A right little pleader

        Don't you have a place (Broadmoor?) where you place the seriously dangerous loonies?

        Yes, it's called the Palace of Westminster.

        1. This post has been deleted by its author

    2. BebopWeBop
      Devil

      Re: A right little pleader

      Or even just blind narcissism.

  6. Lee D Silver badge

    Contempt of court aside...

    Why not just subpoena Whatsapp? They are the ones holding the data, and they allow you to move it to a new phone at any point (your security code may change, but the data doesn't).

    1. MiguelC Silver badge

      I don't think that's right. If you've ever lost or had a phone dying on you, you'll know that usually, the most recent messages are lost. That's because the recovery is made from the last backup available on your Google Drive or iCloud.

    2. FrogsAndChips Silver badge

      If Whatsapp's E2E encryption works as advertised, only encrypted data goes through their servers and they'd have no way of decrypting it without the keys stored on the phones.

    3. Roland6 Silver badge

      Not used WhatApp?

      The only reason why they need.access to the old phone is because Bojo has not enabled chat backup to the cloud, so the entire message base is held within the device.

      So what is interesting about this case is that it reveals normal government procedure isn’t to regularly backup/export messages etc. from phones (to removable storage). So won’t be surprised to discover Bono’s current phone has now had its message store wiped.

      This then feeds into the communications security demands over encryption; no where do they take into consideration access to a physical device without user PIN, nor do they require an ability for a third party to eavesdrop on communications (removing the need for Bojo to remember his PIN and TPTB to have to access the app on that specific device.

  7. wolfetone Silver badge

    "By Thursday the government claimed that it had found a record of the pin code for Johnson's old device and opened it up to the committee."

    So the (thankfully former) Prime Minister wrote down his passcode? Or did he give it to Carrie so she could keep an eye on the philanderer?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      They set it to 00000000 but he couldn't remember how many zeros... or the dymo label on the back wore out...

  8. Tim 11

    obligatory XKCD

    https://xkcd.com/538/

  9. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

    It's very hard to remember 1234 when your education is classical rather than mathematical.

    1. WonkoTheSane

      It was actually 12345 (He has the same password on his luggage) ;-)

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        >It was actually 12345 (He has the same password on his luggage) ;-)

        iPhone, so 6 digit code - either 111111, 123456, or Churchill's birthday...

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          "or Churchill's birthday"

          It will be that one.

          Oh, yuss.

  10. emfiliane

    Now wondering if he went to them after announcing cracking the code, "er, wotsit again? There's an old one at home with some very personal pics on it, y'see. Help a bloke out?"

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Big Brother

    WhatsApp encryption key?

    Seeing as the secret key is only 64 bits, it should be trivially easy for GCHQ to decode the msgs that they have archived at Cheltenham.

    1. FrogsAndChips Silver badge

      Re: WhatsApp encryption key?

      the secret key is only 64 bits

      Source?

      1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

        Re: WhatsApp encryption key?

        If they are implementing what they claim to be implementing Whatsapp's encryption is rather good

  12. MarkMac

    surely the phone can be cloned

    I'm pretty sure that its SOP for spooks to clone the phone's memory and storage so that even if you accidentally trigger a wipe routine you have a copy. The whole thing feels amateurish and suss

    1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

      Re: surely the phone can be cloned

      It's just that it's taken so long for th spooks to get their hands on it.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Q. Why don't our TLA's put specific comms infrastructure in place FOR parliamentary use?

    A. Plausible deniability.

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      You expect the opposition to trust encryption supplied by the government?

      You expect the backbenchers to trust encryption supplied by the cabinet office?

      You expect the cabinet to trust encryption supplied by the chief whip

      You expect the PM to trust encryption suuplied by the security service ?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        No, no, no, Yes. And the last point is why the civil service actually runs the country.

        As opposed to our elected government that at most sets the laws for the civil service to run within. Yes minister continues to be relevant!

  14. jollyboyspecial

    Other Phones?

    All these messages have a sender and at least one recipient yes? The conversations as far as I understand it were mostly between Johnson and ministers, advisors or civil servants? Can't the enquiry just ask for messages from every other possible participant? Sure it would take longer than just getting their hands on the Liar in Chief's phone but they'd get the messages.

    Seems this enquiry is almost determined to ley the government off the hook. Not that I'm surprised by that you understand.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Other Phones?

      The enquiry could indeed ask for the recipients history.

      Whether they are legally required to provide it, or rules around backups etc. is probably a very grey area.

      And I imagine there will be further bouts of Amnesia concerning passwords and PIN numbers.

  15. Jason Bloomberg Silver badge
    FAIL

    Much as I hate defending Boris

    I am happy to believe he doesn't know the PIN as I can never remember my PINs for old phones and bank cards unless written down.

    And it doesn't matter to me if he does or doesn't; I don't believe anyone should be obliged to act against their own interests even though we have sunk so low that we have enacted legislation to make it so.

    I would ask why the Cabinet Office or whoever took the phone off Boris and locked it in a secure safe two years ago didn't make a record of the PIN then?

    They are the ones who have failed to do what they would reasonably have been expected to do, not Boris, not anyone else.

    1. I could be a dog really Silver badge

      Re: Much as I hate defending Boris

      I agree - can't understand why any reasonable person wold downvote that. The number of times I have to use the "reset password" function for the myriad of online sites I use (even though I use "a system" to create them - remembering something like the code for a phone I've not used for a couple of years would be troublesome for me.

    2. Richard 12 Silver badge

      Re: Much as I hate defending Boris

      However, he was very happy to use RIPA to imprison people for forgetting their passwords.

      As he strongly believes that anyone who forgets an important password needs to be locked up, it would be remiss of us not to put him away for two years.

      It's what he wanted.

      And perhaps it would concentrate other minds about that piece of utterly insane legislation.

  16. Roger Kynaston
    Stop

    Please. No Bozo pictures

    We see his ugly mug in all the other news outlets. It is nice that El Reg doesn't feel the need to feed his narcissistic neediness. Could you substitute a suitable vegetable when reporting on him. My vote would be for an aubergine.

    1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

      Re: Please. No Bozo pictures

      A turnip would be too plebeian, I suppose, even if well merited.

  17. old_n_grey

    I was tempted to comment that it's no surprise that he couldn't remember his PIN. After all, he's seems to have forgotten how many children he has sired

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      @old-n-grey

      " I was tempted to comment that it's no surprise that he couldn't remember his PIN. After all, he's seems to have forgotten how many children he has sired"

      tacky. very tacky.

      1. bigphil9009

        Re: @old-n-grey

        But accurate.

      2. old_n_grey

        Re: @old-n-grey

        "tacky, very tacky!

        Is it actually possible to be tacky when talking about Alexander Boris Bumboy Piccaninnies Letterboxes Watermelon-Smiles de Piffle Johnson?

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: @old-n-grey

        "tacky. very tacky."

        Yes, indeed, Boris is.

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Journalist

    Johnson is a journalist. So surely the professional thing to do would have been to dump the phone in a public carpark rubbish bin and deny everything? Worked for Charlie Brooks.

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