BOFH: Lies, damned lies, and standards BOFH logo telephone with devil's horns "... but that's not the turnaround we promised our users!" the Boss bleats. "But it is the recognized industry standard turnaround time," I counter. "Which industry standard is that?" the Boss asks. "The one set by the Association of Servicepeople for Software and Hardware Over the …
Not sure the boss' longevity coefficient is much higher. The PFY might provide two blindfolds for the traffic sprint but you you can wager your last £/€/$/¥ that, either with the PFY's connivance or from the BOFH's instinctive cunning for self preservation, the BOFH's blindfold will be as opaque a pornstar's panties. Hell - he has to see to be able to shove the boss under an appropriate bus.
"I like to look at my clients as a whole in order to determine the best journey to fulfill their purpose. look at my clients as a whole in order to determine the best journey to fulfill their purpose."
Their journey from the window to the carpark one suspects.
If extreme porky density distorts and undermines reality then our politicians would have thrust all of us over that event horizon years ago. Boris could have done it singlehanded.
I believe when one crosses an event horizon time is stretched out to eternity which would explain much about contemporary UK politics if indeed Boris has shoved us over that edge.
I think it only means that the boss gets the idea, but doesn't recognize the original acronym. Alternatively, they do, but they don't think quickly enough to come up with an alternate acronym that still fits the pattern closely enough.
At a previous job the IT dept shared an office with the Health & Safety guy
For some reason that we could never work out management wouldn't let us put a sign on the door saying "Safety, Health & IT"
What a load of Stuart Hall International Travel. Yes, that one is legit, same Stuart Hall who was done for kiddie fiddling as part of Yew Tree.
At my first job after Uni at what was then the Inland Revenue there was an idea to have specialist teams to deal with Appeals, Reviews, and the Self Employed. It actually happened but they did alter the order of the categories.
Or maybe spend your next holiday in Australia's Northern Territory and pick up one of their tourism-promotional bumper stickers: CU in the NT.
Also available as a novelty spare tyre cover for the back of the 4WD.
See you in the NT (as it were.)
I think there were some choice words in "the House" over that tourism campaign and the (?)responsible minister and apparently braindead public(civil) servant(s) enjoyed a well sunk slipper.
The Advertising Agency must have been either a subsidary of BOFH Global or PFY Transnational or more likely the Top End "creatives" were having near death drug induced hallucinations.
I am sure the bumper stickers and other associated merchandise are still available from under the counter (in the usual brown paper wrappers) courtesy of PFY Promotional Products (Xinjiang.)
"The City University of Newcastle upon Tyne."
Funny, but no cigar.
No such place as "City University" in Newcastle. There's Newcastle University and the ex-Polytechnical College now known as University of Northumbria.
Funnily enough, been there, done that, saw the evidence at the time ....and it it documented.
As I can't remember if this site bans links to stop spam I suggest you use your favourite search engine and look the story up.
During my time at Newcastle Poly (as it was), it was mooted to call it the County University of Newcastle upon Tyne. Allegedly they had one print run of the headed paper 'til some one saw the initials...
Many years ago, after every department but IT had changed their name at least once that year, we sugested many rude acronym names for our department. I did win with an acroymn for CLITORIS (Computer Literacy, Information Technology, Original Research & Infrastructure Support) but then said in our managers meeting it would be no good as half the office woudn't be able to find us....
"At my first job after Uni at what was then the Inland Revenue there was an idea to have specialist teams to deal with Appeals, Reviews, and the Self Employed. It actually happened but they did alter the order of the categories."
Reviews, Appeals & The Self-employed?
Extremely highly-regarded and well-respected by clients, s.o. and colleagues are currently threatening to quit because manglement wants to rename their department and the resulting acronym would either be SHIDT or SHIT. Can't write it out in full because that would make it too recognisable. If someone doesn't see sense soon you may well see the story in the news...
I know of a university which changed its name to "Federation University", and when people started making light of the abbreviation of that they sent a letter out to all students saying it was "Federation University Australia".
Naturally, now everyone calls it "Eff Yew Australia".
《Of course another one of the subtler jokes is of course that nutritionists (sometimes confused with dieticians in the UK) are not regulated in any way at all (dieticians are).》
So I put on a Nutitionalist's hat to advise gullible whales to consume used button cells (batteries) as an effective and somewhat faster way of losing those extra llbs/Kgs than the now discredited Toner diet?
What scares me is that there enough Darwin Award nominees out there to land me in serious trouble if I were to somehow find my way to espouse this nonsense to a weight loss social media group.
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