BOFH: It's 4ft tall, heavyset, has optional fax. No they didn't take the toner! BOFH logo telephone with devil's horns "SOMEONE'S STOLEN OUR PHOTOCOPIER OVER THE BREAK!" the Boss says, calmly, bursting into Mission Control. The PFY and I take a moment. "You mean the multifunction printer?" I query. "Yes, yes, but it's gone. Someone's taken it!" "No they haven't," I reply. "They have. It was in the …
I used to know the guy who thought that one up. His main business was agent for the proprietary refills, which he picked up for two figures and sold for four.
We enjoyed the odd imported premium lager together on occasion.
AC because there's a BOFH reading this somewhere and I hate old carpets and quicklime.
premiums to their insurance company?
the one that employs BOFH's brother in law?
the one where BOFH's brother in law got promoted and a bonus because he got such a good deal on the new claims management system?
the claims management system that's so good they were able to lay off half their claims adjusters?
I'd say it's another great classic BOFH tale. The Boss is an idiot, comes to the BOFH for help, who gladly provides and is soon confronted with the full weight of his idiocy.
I do have to wonder how the BOFH and his PFY are going to save their lager from getting smashed by the printer on impact too, if the boss is out for a beer run.
Simon and PFY are sure to capture some clear security footage of the boss lugging a crate of alcohol into the lift for future use.
It really is a shame that the boss's alcoholism has him now sneaking booze into the workplace. I'm sure he will deny all the rumors, of course.
Do any printers/copiers with waste toner bottles not make a mess, don't know any we have had from any of the brands (Canon, HP, Samsung, Sharp, Lexmark) where they don't spill or make a mess removing the bottle (Best ones tend to have sticky bits of plastic to seal, even then they can often leak).
My LJ5 doesn't do waste toner (have no idea how the innards work). It just keeps printing and printing, whenever I need it to. Still on the first toner cartridge after 2 years (I print a page or two a week). I have two more NIB cartridges, but I suspect it will be a long time before I need to open one.
Always assumed HP 4x series printers put waste back into the toner, never thought to check (Googling doesn't show anything) but yes I do remember having to give our Laserjet 5SI a serious clean around the 2 million page mark although this was mostly dust from paper
I hope it's a cold day in hell before that ever happens! Presumbaly, the BOFH and PFY no longer go to the pub for their offsite brainstorming sessions but to a "sports bar".
Fair enough if you think it's necessary to normalise the spelling to EN_US but the BOFH is clearly located in the UK copy editors would do well to respect this.
grin worthy... and I've taken notes on my phone for later use... and diverted my attention while in a group meeting with the beancounter.... gawd does he drone on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on I think he was the doner for the first personality transplant.
I've got the PFY to thank for this, with her constant "you're getting old" line fed to the boss, so the boss thought it a good idea for me to sit in on the friday meeting with him, the line manager, the office admin , our QA guy and the aforementioned beancounter.
I'm thinking he was hoping that I'd get so fed up I'd leap up and strangle the beancounter... but of course reading the BoFH has given me better ideas.
Anyone know where I can get hold of a 1/4 ton printer, some tarmac paint to move a parking spot, an open window, and an 5 storey office building with 6 attatched factory units we can move to.......
3 minutes to Beer o'clock.....
For sure I want to coin the (still after xx years of printing) issue where one has to _manually_ activate the option to convert Letter to A4 in a printer config.
Stop doing this to us! Convert them 1:1 alright. Not even in the USA the Letter format is being used anymore for all I know.
Icon --> Because we need some Big Wigs to solve this issue
One thing I actually do miss about the office: printing circuit/wire diagrams on ledger paper (ANSI B, 17 x 11 inch, usually landscape). It acts as a nice half-scale version of ANSI D (34 x 22).
The only things I would care to print at home -- with my own paper and ink -- would be non-technical necessities, such as maps, itineraries, contact lists, etc. for work travel. Stuff I don't need to waste driving to the office for but absolutely want on hand for the trip.
I'll never understand the US mindset. You guys are happy to go with international standardisation for a lot of things, and in matters of IT are often a driving force behind that standardisation, but paper sizes, middle-endian dates, and a steadfast refusal to use the metric system in favour of an archaic weights and measurements system that doesn't use powers of ten - just why?
I'll never understand the US mindset. You guys are happy to go with international standardisation for a lot of things, and in matters of IT are often a driving force behind that standardisation, but paper sizes, middle-endian dates, and a steadfast refusal to use the metric system in favour of an archaic weights and measurements system that doesn't use powers of ten - just why?
You still drive on the left side of the road, so there's that. Metric is making inroads mostly in fields like jewelry making and cooking in the US.
Brilliant.
I do not envy the poor, sad person who have to assess this workplace accident with the Boss and the printerer.
It'll be either gentle persuasion (just don't ask too many questions), blackmail (stop asking silly questions or your wife will know what you've done with her panties), or another workplace accident (now you've gone and done it, you need to be terminated).
Oh how I would love to be a fly on the wall when the grunts offload the printerers, and count only 5 instead of the 6 that was originally signed offf for.
"But Boss, we sure as hell counted six printerers, and signed off on six! I dunno what 'appened 'ere, mebbe it fell out of the door during transit?"
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