back to article Microsoft makes a game of Team building, with benefits

When a movie or TV director wants to show people wasting time at work, it invariably has them playing computer games. See Peter Gibbons in "Office Space" or the Dunder Mifflin employees in "The Office." But that was then and this is now, a time of hybrid work, with employees working from their homes and companies wondering how …

  1. that one in the corner Silver badge

    Now it'll be a mandatory entry on your timesheet

    and added to the KPIs on the management dashboard.

    Heard in the morning standup:

    "Can you explain why none of you have played IceBreaker once in the past two months?"

    "Well, we were talking about this over our daily tea and buns run, and all we decided that"

    "Don't talk back! You are going stop wasting company time on buns and start playing IceBreaker! We need you to be building up your relationships within the team!"

  2. nintendoeats

    Wake me when they have Unreal Tournament (and even then, like fuck am I going to user their service to do it).

    1. Dan 55 Silver badge

      At the speed Teams runs at it'd be like playing Driller on the C64.

  3. Pirate Dave Silver badge
    Pirate

    So, our patches may still nuke AD on Windows 2016+, but fuck it, let's put games in Teams. Priorities, people! Our Teams teams need to scratch their itch to play old, low-tech games, we don't need to worry about QC on our patches. Nobody will notice if those patches are crap because they'll be too busy playing 3-D minesweeper during the Tuesday post-lunch meeting.

    Good grief. This seems the most completely pointless and wasteful thing MS has thought up in quite a while. Why is Microsoft trying to make Teams LESS useful? It's not like it needed any help in that direction.

    1. ComputerSays_noAbsolutelyNo Silver badge
      Gimp

      ... unless you subscribe to Teams Professional Pro Professional-Edition, which blocks all the games, for only 19,99 per month per user

  4. Pascal Monett Silver badge

    "foster close and collaborative relationships"

    Include Quake III Arena.

    That'll get the adrenalin flowing, sharpen the reflexes and provide a good laugh for everyone involved.

    Minesweeper ? Pah !

    1. AbominableCodeman

      Re: "foster close and collaborative relationships"

      Mr Braff has clearly never observed a public DOTA/Overwatch/Team Fortress game.

  5. beardman
    FAIL

    What a waste of time... They'd better make teams properly work with multiple accounts. For example, Slack has this feature like forever and works perfect.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      What's "like" forever? 20 mins if you're waiting for a beer? 2 mins if you need a pee?

    2. nintendoeats

      Or they could fix the horrendous caching issues, so that it actually shows a correct "online status" for everybody in my list. I'm logged in with two clients at once, and they often disagree (and are also sometimes both wrong).

  6. deadlockvictim

    Nowadays

    Again, Microsoft is thinking too small.

    Elon Musk has shown us how to waste time at work — don't just waste your time (and money), lay waste to the company.

    If you are going to waste time, do it in style.

    Make the company unworkable.

    Lay off half of the staff so that the other half can't get any work done.

    Fire employees who point out exactly what you are doing.

    Destroy what remaining morale there is in the company by telling them that they will have to burn themselves out for the sake of Elon and little more.

    On a different note, companies should organise voluntary LAN game nights just outside office hours with decent games.

    Killing your coworkers multiple times is very satisfying.

  7. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge

    Team building

    with Solitaire?

    1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

      Re: Team building

      Yeah, and Minesweeper. As you rightly alluded to, neither are team games. At best, maybe get competitive over best times or whatever. Of course, there will always be the one person who has to "beat" everyone else and gets no work done at all :-)

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Teams is one of the biggest time wastes, full stop! Now they want to add games to the POS!

    "Over 3 billion people around the world play games, serving a crucial role in bringing people together – especially during these last few years"

    And billions spend too much time gambling, which is why every single UK TV ad for a gambling site carries a tagline for GambleAware and something like half of those are telling you to step away from their site and take a break

  9. xyz Silver badge

    FFS

    That is all

  10. Sceptic Tank Silver badge
    Facepalm

    No more physical activity

    During the lockdowns I used the time productively to polish my shoes during Teams meetings when somebody was monologuing obscure details about their even more obscure project during morning standup meetings.

    Yawn ====>

    1. AbominableCodeman
      Coat

      Re: No more physical activity

      At least Teams stand-ups are not intrinsically discriminatory against people with lower limb and back problems like real stand ups.

      Me in my large overcoat trying to not look like I'm actually sitting down ->

  11. David Hicklin Bronze badge

    Novell Netware

    Playing Snipes but only at lunchtime with the boss !

  12. Missing Semicolon Silver badge

    How about finishing the product

    Before adding games!

  13. navarac Bronze badge

    Games plus ad breaks?

    I suppose there will be the mandatory ad inserts as well.

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