Are the companies supplying rifles and HIMARS and HARM and Hummers to Ukraine expected to simply donate them? I don’t think so. So why is Musk expected to?
An individual or private company shouldn’t get directly involved in wars. That’s very dangerous to them. If the US or EU governments buy stuff from SpaceX then donate it, that’s very different from SpaceX doing it themselves.
The terminals and service sent to Ukraine cost twice as much as regular home terminals because they are the equivalent of business accounts, which provide a higher level of service.
SpaceX is at very real risk of going broke at the moment. They need to expand Starlink hugely to get cash coming in, but they can’t do that until they get the Starship/Superheavy rocket flying. They have literally warehouses full of satellites that have been built but can’t be launched because they don’t fit inside Falcon 9.
Also, as noted, Starlink can now operate in Ukraine because the Ukrainian government gave (begged) them a license to. That’s not the situation in Iran.
China has recently been demanding assurances from SpaceX that they will NOT enable Starlink in China. I’ll bet Russia doesn’t want it either.
If Musk goes against those kinds of people then he’s going to need Putin-level personal security.