Fake vibrating teeth could make great hearing aids

Prosthetic teeth turn out to be effective carriers of vibrations, making them suitable as potential hearing aids. In a research paper titled "The sensitivity of bone conduction for dental implants," published earlier this month in The Journal of the Acoustical Society of America, eggheads at Tongji University in Shanghai …

[b0llchit]

(s)tone deaf

Wait, wait, hear us out

Yes, we will hear you out and it is already done. No sound waves recorded. It must be the computer's fault.

But seriously, a new system not requiring invasive surgery is not approved because, well, it is not invasive enough. Only the invasive medical procedures are reimbursed. That is how the system works. The system is not for improving procedures but to make old style procedures profitable. Talking about being deaf...

[zuckzuckgo]

Re: (s)tone deaf

And besides, root access is a real pain.

[An_Old_Dog]

Re: (s)tone deaf

Remember the "Bone Fone"? It was a radio receiver which you wore like a scarf with both ends draped over your chest. It used bone conduction to transmit the audio to you.

(Icon for stereotypical hearing-aid user ...)

[Cederic]

Re: (s)tone deaf

That's ok, the rest of the world can explore and look to adopt this instead.

Plus of course those of us that just buy our own hearing aids. They're cheaper than a car and get used far more often.

[Sampler]

Re: (s)tone deaf

Wonder how long before chess grand masters start having shiny new teeth...

Beats a pain in the ass..

[Ken Moorhouse]

I wonder if people who are fitted with these...

...would like to listen to drill music.

Will they say they hate oh hate all that percussion?

No? How about a bit of John Williams?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=izNxtsC1b4k

[Brewster's Angle Grinder]

Re: I wonder if people who are fitted with these...

I get the pun. But that so should have been the theme to Jaws...

[Version 1.0]

My vibrating teeth

I remember standing in front of the pile of speakers in Coventry while the Floyd were playing Interstellar Overdrive and feeling everything vibrate ... it was an entertaining ride home on the motorbike because my balance had been affected! But everything went fine and I ran out the next day to buy the album, not any more teeth.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: My vibrating teeth

Reminds me of the time when I worked for a well-known aerospace company and was walking across the end of the site runway when a (now-withdrawn) supersonic passenger aircraft took off. I was able to look straight into for engine exhausts from just far enough away to stand upright but feel the sound. I suspect that, if I'd had false teeth, they would have rattled; my ears were ringing for a while but no lasting impairment (routine hearing checks for works medicals in later jobs).

[bazza]

Radio Teeth

There are stories that, back when radio transmitters were big and powerful, people with fillings of just the right shape who got close to them would start hearing the radio channel (the conductive filling forming a non-linear junction with the rest of the tooth, demodulating the AM signal, causing the tooth to vibrate to the audio signal). A long-dead relative of mine experienced this, and thought nothing of it until she realised the car had no radio fitted.

Should be possible to do this properly in the modern era!

[Will Godfrey]

Re: Radio Teeth

"Should be possible to do this properly in the modern era!"

I see what you did there.

[bazza]

Re: Radio Teeth

Autocorrect kept on putting it back to ear, the stupid ruddy thing. I had to sweat to get it right. Probably just given someone an idea for a product name...

[aregross]

Re: Radio Teeth

I remember an episode of Gilligan's Island like that.

Hi Fi Gilligan

https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x6u3hs8

[that one in the corner]

No doubt fitted with Bluetooth - Munch on that.

Visions of the car stereo offering to pair with your teeth or the horror of being bluejacked or rickrolled, knowing you can't even keep it out with hands over the ears!

Know we understand the true meaning behind Munch's The Scream, begging the viewer to help with the aid of some pliers.

[zuckzuckgo]

Will it connect to my phone? I hope the tooth literally blue. Then at least the name will finally make sense.

[mecmec]

Yes it will. I have a BAHA implant. The processor has integrated bluetooth.

[AdmFubar]

Oh what will the porn industry think of next.....

and now this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BAYSst9P9wU

[bazza]

Has anyone dared click this link yet? Is doing so going to be a matter of extreme regret?

[dc_m]

Re: IBM Engineer...

No way I'm clicking that at work!

[Pascal Monett]

It's a Monty Python-style thing.

Not indispensible.

[J.G.Harston]

Fake teeth? I think you mean false teeth. And vibrating false teeth, not false vibrating teeth. Word order matters.

[A Non e-mouse]

I was in a running shop and they had some bone-conductor headphones out for demo. Being a cynical soul, I wasn't expecting much (something like poor quality AM) I was amazed at the sound quality. I can see that these vibrating teeth could be of comparible (or better) quality.

[John Robson]

And for hearing aids much of what you perceive as quality is just not needed.

I don't care if they can produce sound over ~5kHz, because I can't hear it anyway (not until it's somewhere well over 100dB).

How do they get charged? I don't fancy sleeping with a power cable in my mouth.

[Spazturtle]

I would guess that they don't get charged, it would make more sense for them to be radio or induction powered.

[Ididntbringacoat]

A biting comment

I'll have to chew on that for a while.

[Ken Shabby]

Re: A biting comment

An invention like that could come back and bite them.

Mine is the one with the apéritif in the pocket.

[yetanotheraoc]

Perfect for cheating at chess

Not to mention gaslighting. Tinfoil hats are so yesteryear. Now we need a tinfoil helmet aka Faraday cage.

[MiguelC]

Re: Perfect for cheating at chess

Perfect for those disliking anal beads, one would suppose

[Trollslayer]

Re: Perfect for cheating at chess

Is that the sound of experience?

[iron]

At last! A less intrusive way to beat a chess Grandmaster than a vibrating butt plug!

(If you don't know what I'm talking about Google Magnus Carlsen, it is a very funny story.)

[teebie]

I prefer to just take this at face value and ask no further questions.

[Anonymous Coward]

He’s a spy!

He’s smiling.

[andy gibson]

From the 80s movie "Real Genius"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YyZ4gGCCqss