back to article Is the Apple car real? These patents suggest yes

Is Apple really getting into the automotive business? A joint investigation between Japanese financial publication Nikkei and Tokyo analytics company Intellectual Property Landscape found that Apple has filed patents – at least 248 of them – for everything from seats and windows to vehicle-to-everything (V2X) technology that …

  1. Winkypop Silver badge
    Trollface

    Apple car

    Rounded corners: check

    Recharge twice a day: check

    Obsolete within 2 years: check

    Very expensive: check

    Subscription services: check

    Crammed full of high tech chips: oh wait!

    1. Warm Braw

      Re: Apple car

      Don't forget the magic repair wand that will be required to bring each proprietary spare part to life at the anointed dealership.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Coat

      Re: Apple car

      But how will they fit the Genius Garage into the mall?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Joke

        Re: Apple car

        > But how will they fit the Genius Garage into the mall?

        No need for a garage / dealer network: simply trade-in your previous Apple car for a new one when it starts to run slowly, or exhibits faults.

      2. Rob Daglish

        Re: Apple car

        Polestar have one in the Trafford Centre. Just beside John Lewis.

        Admittedly, it's more of a showroom than a workshop, but there's obviously a way to get the vehicles in there.

        Come to think of it, Tesla had nicked one of the car parks too last time I was there

    3. J. Cook Silver badge

      Re: Apple car

      And hopefully, better customer service and QC / fit n finish than the other high-tech EV that's out there. Or a Honda Civic.

    4. BrownishMonstr

      Re: Apple car

      > Rounded corners: check

      **Checks date** Yep, it isn't 2008 anymore.

      > Recharge twice a day: check

      My iPhone 8 plus only needed charging twice a day after 3 years, at which point I replaced the battery, so a nightly charge was all that was required.

      >Osolete within 2 years: check

      I had my 8 plus for four years, and it was still receiving updates every few months. Could have kept it longer, but wanted to upgrade to a fancier, new phone. My Samsung tabbie stopped receiving updates after 2 years.

      >Very expensive: check

      Yep, they are. But I also don't have the time, nor can I be arsed, to fiddle with my phone or tech anymore. No more going into the settings like an excited teenager. I just want the stuff to work.

  2. A Non e-mouse Silver badge

    Just because Apple has filled a few patents, it doesn't mean it's going to make something. I remind you all of one patent that British Rail filled. Yes, the national rail operator filled a patent for a flying saucer...

    1. werdsmith Silver badge

      That was BR Derby research people having a bit of fun. It was supposed to be Fusion powered, never meant to be serious.

      https://worldwide.espacenet.com/patent/search/family/010483030/publication/GB1310990A?q=pn%3DGB1310990

      Was covered right here:

      https://www.theregister.com/2006/03/13/br_flying_saucer/

  3. trevorde Silver badge
    Trollface

    Apple's new business model

    Patent troll

    --> icon

    1. Geoff Campbell Silver badge
      Windows

      Re: Apple's new business model

      New?

      GJC

  4. Charlie Clark Silver badge

    "While 248 patents is a lot…"

    Excuse me, have you looked at how much stuff goes into a car? There are probably around 248 patents for the glove compartment alone!

    There's no doubt that Apple wants more of the value chain but that's a very long way from building its own car. As for AI-driving, the competition now has years and millions of KM more data and is pushing ahead with driverless cars.

    1. Swarthy

      Re: "While 248 patents is a lot…"

      <pedant>Well, 248 patents is a "lot"; it's a judgement call on if it's a large lot, or a small lot....</pedant>

      As for the second paragraph, that sounds an awful lot like the comments that were made when it was speculated that Apple would be making a phone. "There's no doubt that Apple wants to improve the iPod, but that's a very long way from building its own phone. They'd never stand a chance, Nokia and Motorola have decades more experience, and are pushing towards touch-screen functionality."

      1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

        Re: "While 248 patents is a lot…"

        On the other hand "248 over 22 years", so the oldest ones are due to expire in the next 3 years or so. Unless they are keeping it exceptionally quiet, I don't see an Apple Car coming out before those patents expire.

  5. The Oncoming Scorn Silver badge
    Joke

    & The Inevitable

    when it brakes* down Apples response will be "You're driving it wrong!"

    *Pun intended.

  6. Mayday
    Gimp

    I like Apple stuff

    You may or may not. That’s cool. I’m not fussed what phone or PC you fancy. Anyway.

    I don’t think I’m about to grab an Apple iCar though. Especially not a v1. I’ll get a car from a crowd who actually makes cars.

    1. BrownishMonstr

      Re: I like Apple stuff

      It would be nice for Apple to make a car.

      I wouldn't be able to afford it, but it's good for companies to break into the field with clever ideas, it might encourage competition.

      1. Mayday

        Re: I like Apple stuff

        That's a good point. I suppose Apple never used to make phones, media players or watches either. For better or for worse.

  7. MJI Silver badge

    iCar

    What like a BMW I8?

  8. The Northerner Up North

    Battery Life....

    Wonder if the battery life will suddenly deteriorate for all the cars of a certain age for no apparent reason?

    ..and battery replacement will be eye wateringly expensive.

    ...and lets not talk about servicing which will only be available at an Apple Servicing Centre. Probably a couple of hundred miles from where you live.

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