back to article Crypto market crashes on Celsius freeze, inflation news

The cryptocurrency world is experiencing what can only be described as a meltdown, with prices plummeting today to lows not seen since the end of 2020. The plunge is likely due to several factors including general economic uncertainty as seen in the stock market, inflation, bearish conditions and loss of confidence in crypto- …

  1. A Non e-mouse Silver badge
    FAIL

    Crypto == Gambling.

    1. elsergiovolador Silver badge

      These days even going outside is a gamble. You never know whether you get stabbed or stop and searched and a copper finds your weed.

      1. martinusher Silver badge

        ....seriously, are they still wasting their time with this stuff? Even Thaiand has joined the decriminalization/legalization bandwaggon.

        1. EricB123 Bronze badge

          At 0.2 %

          The weed legalization law in Thailand needs an asterisk in the name. The maximum THC content allowed is 0.2%.

          "So, how many kilos do you wish to purchase today, sir?

          To be continued... ( Or perhaps not).

    2. Version 1.0 Silver badge

      Crypto == Getting screwed. FTFY

      1. sreynolds Silver badge

        No, in gambling you know the odds. The house takes a fixed percentage the payout is known.

        Crypto is a ponzi scheme to fleece the people of their funds.

        In gambling, some people derive some pleasure from pissing their funds away. Why not just take some dollar bills out and watch them burn. That is quite lovely and entertaining too.

        1. elsergiovolador Silver badge

          Yep, KLF quite enjoyed burning £1 million quid.

          1. Jedit Silver badge
            Mushroom

            "KLF quite enjoyed burning £1 million quid."

            At the time, maybe. I recall that Jimmy Cauty has expressed regret about it since.

    3. badflorist

      Is it gambling or something less? Gasoline is at a all time high in many places and in most places you can't buy gasoline with crypto, however, you can buy gasoline with a lottery ticket.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        I suppose the gamble is using crypto to pay your electricity bill

  2. Howard Sway Silver badge

    Soon after, Bitcoin tumbled 10 percent

    Does that mean it's now Web 2.7?

  3. elsergiovolador Silver badge

    It's going to crash!!!

    Whenever there is an article that crypto market has crashed, it reminds me of this video:

    Don't Buy Bitcoin. It's Going To Crash!!!

    1. Jason Bloomberg

      Re: It's going to crash!!!

      Don't Buy Bitcoin. It's Going To Crash!!!

      And, when it does; that's when one buys. Hoping it soars again while remembering to be smart enough to get out before the next crash arrives. And, as long as it doesn't crash too badly, it's still a profit.

      It's a game I might play if I had money I didn't care about losing.

  4. newspuppy

    Bitcoin, ETH, etc is a SCAM

    In Gambling one may at times win.

    In a SCAM/ Ponzi situation... we have a deal where scammer wins and everyone else loses...

    1. Ian 55

      Re: Bitcoin, ETH, etc is a SCAM

      Not quite true. I wouldn't touch it with the proverbial, and most have / will lose everything, but it's more than just the scammers who have made a profit.

      Just as in a Ponzi.

  5. gerryg

    Tulip bulbs

    That's the answer

    1. sreynolds Silver badge

      Re: Tulip bulbs

      Someone once wanted me to invest in some single malts. At least you could drink that if things turned out bad.

      1. IceC0ld

        Re: Tulip bulbs

        I do believe he said you were to INGEST single malt, a FAR better way to do it :o)

    2. EricB123 Bronze badge

      Re: Tulip bulbs

      That's the most brilliant answer to anything I've heard today! Congratulations.

    3. Arthur the cat Silver badge

      Re: Tulip bulbs

      That's the answer

      No, buy shares in a company for carrying out an undertaking of great advantage, but nobody to know what it is.

  6. vtcodger Silver badge

    As you can well imagine

    As you can probably imagine, it's a busy day at https://web3isgoinggreat.com/

    Last five headlines:

    . Tron's algorithmic stablecoin (USDD) wobbles

    . Crypto.com and BlockFi announce layoffs

    . Binance pauses Bitcoin withdrawals for 3 hours due to "stuck" transactions

    . Terra investors file class action lawsuit against Binance.US

    . Lido-staked Ether (stETH) loses peg

    And so it goes.

  7. scrubber
    Facepalm

    Inflation hedge

    Some Cryptos are conceptually inflation hedges due to fixed supply. If people are leveraging their real world wealth to fund their crypto speculation then obviously any real world problems or crypto falls will lead to a disproportionate sell off in leveraged assets to cover margins etc.

    As for Celsius, well, there is some form there from previous associations that investors should have looked at before handing over control of their assets.

    1. Ian 55

      Re: Inflation hedge

      There's a limited supply of my shit too - I am not going to be around forever - but that doesn't mean that it's a viable currency or store of value.

      1. martinusher Silver badge

        Re: Inflation hedge

        ...and at a pinch at least you could use it for fertilizer.

      2. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge

        Re: Inflation hedge

        You won't know till you try it. How about approaching the Royal Mint with a business case. The marketing could be taken care of by their people using existing channels.

      3. scrubber

        Re: Inflation hedge

        Are you Gavin Turk?

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Artist%27s_Shit

      4. EricB123 Bronze badge

        Re: Inflation hedge

        Well, some woman made a killing selling $1000 fart NFTs. If you continue along this line of thinking, you might be the next NFT billionaire with your shit idea.

        Just saying

        1. Arthur the cat Silver badge

          Re: Inflation hedge

          Well, some woman made a killing selling $1000 fart NFTs.

          You can put smells on the blockchain?

      5. Jedit Silver badge
        IT Angle

        "There's a limited supply of my shit too"

        Announcing the launch of the new cryptocurrency, Shitcoin. With other coins the bottom may be falling out of the market, but with Shitcoin the market is falling out of the bottom!

        (The IT angle? SH.)

        1. hoola Silver badge

          Re: "There's a limited supply of my shit too"

          Not sure how the mining works though.......

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: "There's a limited supply of my shit too"

            That'll be down to the 'gong farmers'...

            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gong_farmer

    2. Charlie Clark Silver badge

      Re: Inflation hedge

      Some Cryptos are conceptually inflation hedges due to fixed supply.

      Well, there seems to be a problem with that concept. Inflation hedge is just one of the many justifications trotted out for these various schemes.

    3. neilo

      Re: Inflation hedge

      How is cryptocurrency in any way of fixed supply? Spinning up a new crypto is ludicrously easy; there are several YouTube videos just on that. And of course people use real-world assets to fund their crypto; the only people who didn't do that were the one setting up this Ponzi scheme in the first place.

  8. VicMortimer
    Flame

    It might be freezing in Celsius...

    It might be freezing in Celsius, but right now it's really hot in Fahrenheit.

    It's 94 right now, and supposed to be 96 tomorrow. My AC can't keep up.

    1. Arthur the cat Silver badge

      Re: It might be freezing in Celsius...

      It might be freezing in Celsius, but right now it's really hot in Fahrenheit.

      Go for Kelvin, that'll always outdo Celsius or Fahrenheit.

  9. Ian 55

    Celsius has the wonderful business plan

    of lending out at less interest than they pay depositors.

    Can't see what could possibly go wrong with that.

    Apparently they make up a big chunk of the difference by 'investing' in Luna, and with a name like that, it has to be going to the moon!

    1. Arthur the cat Silver badge

      Re: Celsius has the wonderful business plan

      … Luna, and with a name like that, it has to be going to the moon!

      Or gently ticking.

    2. Jedit Silver badge
      Meh

      "with a name like that, it has to be going to the moon!"

      As I recall, that's exactly why Luna is called that.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    HODL

    Hahahahaha Oh Dear, Losers

  11. druck Silver badge

    Good

    My heart bleeds for all the extortionists and fraudsters who take payment in crypto.

  12. J. Cook Silver badge
    Trollface

    This is all I have to say on the matter.

  13. fidodogbreath Silver badge

    The plunge is likely due to several factors including...

    ...that no one can cogently express why crypto has monetary value, other than mumble, mumble blockchain something, mumble, mumble.

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