back to article Verizon: Ransomware sees biggest jump in five years

The cybersecurity landscape continues to expand and evolve rapidly, fueled in large part by the cat-and-mouse game between miscreants trying to get into corporate IT environments and those hired by enterprises and security vendors to keep them out. Despite all that, Verizon's annual security breach report is again showing that …

  1. b0llchit Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Biometric and wearable authentication is more secure and more convenient and would almost instantly mitigate a massive amount of cybersecurity vulnerability.

    And when the biometric database (eventually) is in the hands of the criminals, who is secure then? We will all be asked to change our fingerprints, get a new face and pop in some new eyes.

    There is one constant in security: there is no ultimate security; it is a process.

    Pretending that you can magically solve many problems with biometric data is worse than forcing someone to change his/her passwords once in a while.

    1. Alumoi Silver badge
      Trollface

      Oh, no worries, we'll give you a free 1 month credit monitoring and a 10 USD coupon.

  2. Version 1.0 Silver badge
    Joke

    Dear b011chit your password has expired, we have issued a new password, please visit your account to confirm it.

    1. b0llchit Silver badge
      Angel

      Dear Version 1.0,

      You are running a very old Version of our great Version software. Your Version of Version has become obsolete and incompatible with current standards and is no longer supported. The comment module has shown serious flaws as you are probably aware of. Please make sure to complete the mandatory upgrade to Version 33.0 and try again.

      Please note, as stated in Version 1.0 TOS and EULA, that the bodily fluid test is mandatory while downloading, which will be to be matched against your local anti-criminal-record store. At install time you will be required to deposit your house key and lease/deed while providing evidence that the US-tax on legal and illegal software has been paid. An AirBnB compensation will be made until you can reclaim your key. Any children will be cared for in the mean time.

      We are confident that version 33.0 will be quite satisfactory for you. Please remember to pass the mandatory survey on satisfaction for your convenience when installation is complete. The local copy&paste police enforcement office is informed of you arrival in short time and has your temporary accommodation available.

      Thank your for choosing Version software.

      Best regards, b0llchit - Mental Image Extraction and Common Thought Distortion Inc.

  3. yetanotheraoc Silver badge

    We're only here for the monetizing

    "ransomware by itself is really just a model of monetizing an organization's access"

    That's all right, then. Nothing wrong with a little monetizing, as all the Web 2.0 organisations will attest. The unwritten rule of the wild wild web: By not securing their data, they are agreeing to be monetized.

  4. Gene Cash Silver badge

    Verizon?

    I thought they WERE ransomware... at least where phone service is concerned. A friend's Verizon bill just doubled, because they took him off his family plan without bothering to ask, or even tell him.

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