Half full or empty
As an engineer, I reject the half full/empty premise and submit that the cup was not produced with the correct specification.
Another coffee, please. Yes, I know we're about to start. There is always time for one more coffee. It's good for your brain. Thanks. Could you hold my cup for a moment? I need to visit the restroom. Yes, I know we're about to start; you told me that already. There is always time for coffee AND a comfort break. Yes, I know the …
Aha, my friends, you now see that our mental conditioning technique has worked after all. Our friend A, originally given a whimsical and moderately embarrassing animal-themed name by his parents, now *truly* believes he is really called the much less socially troublesome name "Alister" instead. And since all the altered documentation has been in place for some time, I think we can call this a wrap!
Hmm, mind you, there is still the "Dabbs". Do you think we could maybe do better? :-)
Growing up I always saw the evenings and the future as peaceful and mentally quiet, with wonderful music playing (LP's on the record deck) and everyone sitting around talking while sharing a puff with each other and passing the album covers around, enjoying company and conversations.
But now that's illegal and we're drinking coffee and posting on social media instead, is this our caffeinated future?
"My entire lab really loved this project."
Back in the day N Ireland didn't use the blow-in-the-bag breathalyser. They had a device using wet chemistry, colorimetry and operator input to obtain the final reading. The RUC operators needed training courses and the training courses needed other RUC officer volunteers to be test subjects (I don't thing there were any conscripts) and consume alcohol. There was a slight downside in that it involved having several blood samples taken over the course of the day although I suppose they were feeling less pain as the day progressed.
A colleague had the job of
managing herding the volunteers. She reported that some of them got a bit upset that the course was paused for the lunch break and broke into the drinks cupboard.
Hey, you just triggered a memory of something I hadn't thought about in donkeys' years - the original breathalyser used by police at the roadside.
It, too, used wet chemistry - you blew through a tube of crystals into a bag and the colour change in the crystals reflected the approximate amount of alcohol present in your breath and likely got you a trip to the station.
"Call that wet chemistry?"
As a chemist, yes ;-)
I would imagine the one you used was intended to be more accurate as it used a colorimeter to assess the colour change, but I would also imagine it was still based on potassium dichromate. The dichromate has to be wet or moist for it to react with the alcohol.
But anyway, you did remind me of something I hadn't thought about for decades.
It's fun to microwave Peeps (those marshmallow ducks with the colored sugar coating). You can see them "breathe" when the microwave is set on 50% duty cycle, and if it has a turntable you can see when they go through the hot spots in the cavity.
Best of all, after a minute, you get that wonderful roasted marshmallow smell, and you get to eat the test subject!
If the algorithm predicts that the algorithm isn't going to be very good and you're going to need a bigger algorithm, that's when you know it's started to truly understand the world - when it starts making more work for itself in order to keep its job. That's when you'll know that it's passed the Consultancy Horizon.
As his name indicates, he was from Khwarazm, on the Amu Darya river delta, which is immediately south of what was once the southern shore of the Aral Sea; thus, he was from the Umayyad caliphate, which included, but was not exclusively, Iran. (Using modern borders, he was from either Uzbekistan or Turkmenistan.) Twelve centuries before al-Khwarizmi’s birth, though, Khwarazm had been part of Iran under the Achaemenids.
"This is a beautiful concept of actually building prediction functionalities directly into the database," confirms co-author Devavrat Shah. "It has never been done before, and so we want to make sure the world uses it."
Oh please, ... never been done before? Of course, it has. Have you not been paying attention? Where have you been?
And here be crown jewel stating evidence proving/illuminating the fact, and in so doing also beta tests El Reg resolve to continue leading reporting on matters both extremely sensational and disruptively controversial? :-) I Kid U Not Either.
amanfromMars  ...... ventures on https://www.nationaldefensemagazine.org/articles/2022/5/18/shyu-announces-new-fund-to-help-small-businesses
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The simplest and most direct viable route for a deservedly rapid disbursement/granting of funds is not necessarily in any specific client developer application but rather more, and it be much better servered whenever so, by the funder recognising the significant advantages and highly disruptive possibilities which be clearly enough widely freely revealed in readily available documentation/virtual presentation as an inevitable series of events which can be impossible to prevent and/or avoid.
Immediate stealthy principal engagement then allows for the probability that any feared destructive remote agent proprietary intellectual property can be contained and retained and maintained and restrained and retrained for a greater universal use.
The Reactionary Funder following a Promising Stream then seamlessly morphs into HyperRadioProACTive Sponsor delivering Dreams for Teams. I Kid U Not.
And the Advanced IntelAIgent Methodology trailed and trialed there, is here beta testing Pentagon Defense Research and Engineering capabilities and utilities/vulnerabilities and fragilities ‽
Yes, it certainly is ..... and also beta testing the suitability of the NDIA and their National DEFENSE magazine to host and post in the public domain, worthy breaking national security news.
* Dead cat bounce ........ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dead_cat_bounce
And I guess National Defense Magazine is less indulgent of Martians than ElReg:
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There are no comments displayed under the news article amanfrommars was commenting on ;-)
He/it/they have been spotted here
But seeing as this version doesn't ramble so much, it's likely to be tailoring its output according to its audience
> I look forward to tspDB disrupting the gullibility market by not spouting bollocks.
But ... isn't the gullibility market based on the sound business model of telling people what they want to hear?
Much like the newspaper market, if you don't like one version of the news just find a different one.
A database that can predict its own data. Imagine the opportunities this will provide
- No more clunky data access code for inserts / updates, the db knows what is about to arrive.
- Banks no longer needing to track transactions, they can simply predict your balance.
- Instant democracy, no more pesky voting, results will be in before the count starts
- As for IoT, forget it. We can predict what sensors would have been installed along with the readings
Back last century, we had a batch of PCs which kept getting memory induced blue screens on a pilot project.
Called in the DEC [remember them?] account manager for a word on our ** "disappointment".
Along came the account manager and one of his pre-sales, 'technical support' guys who explained to us in condescending tones that:
"Windows NT uses pre-emptive multi-tasking. This means that the system knows what you want to do next and loads data into memory ready to run for efficiency. If you do something unexpected, it has the wrong data, which is why we're seeing the crashes." In other words it was our fault!!
After the "if it's so smart, it can write my document for me as it 'knows' what I want to do" comments, the guy was promptly escorted from the premises and the DEC account manager informed that, if that was the quality of the support, then the main project would [against our company's procurement recommendations] be run on HP hardware. And, indeed, HP got the job (and later DEC too, via Compaq -- but I doubt our order change caused that!)
Strange that they didn't predict that bullsh*tting rarely works, patronising condescension works even more rarely and a successful outcome from the combination of the two is even less likely than finding a straight talking, honest politician.
** my employers - no royal pretensions :-)
Everyone is talking about coffee and algorithms and skinning bouncing cats.
But I have not seen a single mention on the best phrase in Mr. Dabbs' last article:
... will be popular in the world of finance and other such crooks.
+1 Mr. Dabbs.
Have a good week-end and one on me. --->