Not to brag TOO MUCH but I'm so smart, that I already KNOW HOW to refine U235 from a mere 520 tonnes of common crushed rock to get common yellowcake and then build my own nuke by spinning uranium hexaflouride into my self-built ceramic-lined Aluminum Tube with a Tube centerfuges laser drilled with microholes spinning at 35,000 RPM on my custom built (Easy to make too!) magnetic bearings. This will let me enrich U235 to 95% perfection for my nuclear fission needs! I don't even NEED that many separator tubes! I just make 1000 or so running in a small warehouse powered by a common propane fuel cell generator system so I don't arouse any of the local housing council's suspicion.
From there, I will take two slabs of 7 kg 95% enriched U235 and make a GUN-SLAM detonation device using my fancy self-built two tonne magnetic induction rail to slam one 7 KG U235 slug installed on a ferrous (i.e. magnetic) slug backed with a tungsten Neutron Reflector into the other end ALSO containing a 7 kg chunk encased in a tungsten based neutron reflector at the end of a long tube so that it all goes super-critical and starts the around 10 to 15 kiloton FISSION-based detonation process! No need for explosives to slam chunks of U235 together when modern rail gun tech (or even high-pressure pneumatic or hydraulic RAM technology!) will work just as well to start the fission process!
I HIGHLY SUGGEST creating a NEW swimming pool and underground home with this device since 10 to 15 kilotons is a pretty BIG BANG! I do suggest a radiation-suit and lead aprons for the day. After that, you could send in your innane/insane mother-in-law to scout the newly dug up surroundings before you take up residence and to test the local radiation levels! If her skin doesn't fall off and eyes don't melt out you are good to go!
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AND FOR THE KICKER, I can also use my home built cyclotron to continuously slam heavy nuclei into a chunk of heavy metal such as tungsten, gold, cadmium, manganese and even plain old IRON at a continuous rate so that I create a METASTABLE STRUCTURAL ISOMER to just before its tip-over-point where it cannot absorb any more energy. That point lets the chunk of metal become and stay ONLY METASTABLE meaning its structural integrity can collapse at ANY time with the addition of a bare amount of extra energy. That structural integrity is at the molecular binding level so the inherent amount of cascade failure induced energy release is into the KILOTON range! A structural isomer can be created from ANY heavy metal and not just something like Hafnium!
And when you ADD that final tip-over energy input, a cascading-failure molecular binding energy collapse occurs and a supersonic detonation results that is about TWO KILOTONS of thermal and explosive shock wave all contained in a small space about the size of a common filing cabinet! Since there is NO RADIATION AT ALL in a structural isomer, it CANNOT be detected by normal means! Sooooooo, if you want to create your OWN 500 metre wide, 250 metre deep fishing lake in your favourite farming township, you may do so using a Metastable Structural Isomer!
Do remember to wear your sunglasses, some 60 SPF sunblock AND maybe a foil volcano suit whilst witnessing your NEW fishing hole creation event!
You can ALSO use this on you most hated Nth-Form bully to get a little more SATISFACTION out of this glorious event by inviting him/her for some FREE fishing at your as-of-yet unfinished lake!
Meh!
V