back to article Fortnite banana can appear in court naked says judge in Epic vs Apple legal footnote

US District Judge Yvonne Gonzalez Rogers late last week handed down a judgment [PDF] in the Epic Games vs Apple antitrust trial, which is likely to have significant consequences for developers and the corporations that control the ecosystems in which they operate. However, it also included a footnote which unexpectedly set …

  1. David Webb

    It's already clothed

    Correct me if I'm mistaken, but isn't a banana with peel a dressed banana? If you had a banana without the peel then it would be naked, so putting clothing over the clothing of a banana makes it like that episode from friends. Then again, could you take the peel off a banana and put on a dressing of chocolate sprinkles and then describe it as a dressed banana. Also, typing banana this much is really hard!

    BTW, why did I think it was April first?

    1. KarMann Silver badge
      Paris Hilton

      Re: It's already clothed

      And what if the idea of being 'dressed' is interpreted in the sense that it's usually applied to chickens and other fowl creatures? Then, being dressed would mean not wearing that peel.

    2. Loyal Commenter Silver badge

      Re: It's already clothed

      Also, typing banana this much is really hard!

      Are you starting to feel like Nanny Ogg, whereas she knew how to start spelling banana, but didn't know how you stopped.

      1. MJI Silver badge

        Re: It's already clothed

        Banana

        Bananana

        Banananana

        Bananananana

        I see what you mean

        1. Dizzy Dwarf

          Re: It's already clothed

          (probably) Everyone's favourite Ankh-Morpork street-food vendor:

          Barbara's Beautifully Barbequed Bananas

      2. jake Silver badge

        Re: It's already clothed

        I read that joke in Boys Life magazine back in 1966ish.

        (I briefly subscribed, just for Bobby Fischer's "Checkmate" column.)

    3. Kane Silver badge

      Re: It's already clothed

      "Then again, could you take the peel off a banana and put on a dressing of chocolate sprinkles and then describe it as a dressed banana."

      With a salted caramel sauce and call it sexy banana.

      Mmmmm...

      1. jake Silver badge

        Re: It's already clothed

        Just the fruit, warmed gently in a flaming caramel rum[0] sauce with a hint of cinnamon, finished with a small pinch of either Jacobson or Maldon finishing salt. Serve topping real vanilla ice cream.

        [0] Meyer's Dark recommended, but trust your own taste buds.

    4. Jedit
      Boffin

      "isn't a banana with peel a dressed banana?"

      A banana in a tuxedo is already an overdressed banana. We don't need the clarification.

    5. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: It's already clothed

      So you peel it gradually: one skin, two skin, three skin...

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Bananas wear pyjamas ... as eny fule kno

    1. 42656e4d203239

      updoot for the Molesworth reference...

  3. Zarno Bronze badge
    Coat

    I wonder if...

    I wonder if there was ever a chance it could end in a split decision?

    On that note, full contact court would have been an Epic way to settle this dispute.

  4. alain williams Silver badge

    'just a banana man,'

    Does this ruling not apply to 'banana women' or depictions of ? (If such things exist). Of should there have been a comma before "man" ?

    1. Wellyboot Silver badge

      Re: 'just a banana man,'

      you can find out!

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3k1uec1JIdc

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Bananaman is in reality...

    Indeed, in the latest strip our hero only had *half* a banana to hand when peril threatened, leaving the superhero version with a lower half clad in black shorts & with distinctly knobbly knees.

    Much to the general bemusement and hilarity of all, naturally.

  6. Neil Barnes Silver badge

    I assume there was no reference

    to the length or straightness of the banana?

    1. Wellyboot Silver badge
      Happy

      Re: I assume there was no reference

      A gentleman does not enquire about such things.

    2. alain williams Silver badge

      Re: I assume there was no reference

      I am not aware if the judge was pleased to see the banana,

  7. HildyJ Silver badge
    Angel

    Peaches?

    Can the ruling be applied to peaches? How about a peach juxtaposed with a banana? How about a suggestively shaped root vegetable?

    As far as clothing, is clothing a banana in latex okay?

  8. LDS Silver badge
    Devil

    But Apple showed its naked apple?

    And moreover with that alluring bite? Ask this post icon!

  9. mtp
    Facepalm

    Fruity sexual discrimination

    Every banana you see in shops is sterile so this is a unacceptble intrusion into their unfortunate sexual status. Shame on the lawyers.

    1. jake Silver badge

      Re: Fruity sexual discrimination

      I rather suspect the Banana-clones are quite comfortable with their reproduction technique and hardly find it "unfortunate", regardless of who is describing it ... and in fact, if they thought about it at all, they might find yours rather disturbing.

  10. Julz Silver badge

    So

    A naked banana has its skin on yet a dressed crab has all its insides on the outside. Language is great...

    1. jake Silver badge

      Re: So

      I can assure you that last time I dressed a hog, it had nothing to do with adding layers.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Sound the Peeeeeeel

    If I remember my English lessons "naking" (the root of naked) refers to peeling, so a naked banana is one that has been peeled. Therefore a unpeeled banana is not naked.

  12. Teiwaz
    Coat

    at the risk of being considered confused and failing to make any sense..

    Salad is considered dressed when slathered in oil or somesuch.

    Try that excuse buck naked and oiled up on the street though....

    ...oiled up like a wet banana...

  13. jake Silver badge

    Perspective ...

    ... of a Yank.

    The court documents clearly say 'he's a banana man", not "Bananaman". To me, this indicates he is one of the group of entities known as "banana men", and not the superhero known as "Bananaman", as seen in numerous documentaries.

    Personally, I'm going with the missed-in-transcription "banana, man" theory ... but not as voiced by the inestimable Beeblebrox. The voice I hear is that of Bart Simpson.

    1. Ace2

      Re: Perspective ...

      [Voice of Sam Elliot] The Banana abides. I don’t know about you but I take comfort in that. It’s good knowin’ he’s out there. The Banana. Takin’ ‘er easy for all us vegetables.

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