Lost in IKEA? So, it seems, is Windows Microsoft Windows flaunts itself upon the screens of IKEA as the not-at-all creepy setup screens pose an unanswerable question – can we use your location? The problem, as any visitor to the retail giant will attest, is actually knowing where one is in the temple of flatpacked furniture. We've certainly spent many an hour …
My wife and I have an unspoken rule about IKEA — we go there separately and we don't comment on what the other bought.
My wife does sometimes bait me by asking me if she has spent too much (at IKEA) but I'm too clever to go down that road.
I just wait for the bills at the end of the month for an idea to see if too much money has actually been spent.
BTW people, it is pronounced 'ii-kay-ya', not 'ai-ki-ya' or 'oi-ki-ya'. You know who you are.
A group of people I knew once had a native Swedish speaker amongst them, and for amusement they had a game called The Ikea Game, where they picked a product name out of the catalogue at random and (1) had to try to pronounce it correctly and (2) the others then had to guess what kind of product it was.
Well... I suppose it must have helped pass the time.
Nope. It is pronounced ee-kay-ah.
"Fluent Swedish speaker"
And there's your first mistake. It's pronounced however the locals want to pronounce it, despite any efforts on the part of the marketing department.
Even Lidl have given up trying to pronounce if Lie Dull in the adverts and now use slogans like "In the middle of Lidl" etc. And don't even get me started on that poncy sounding Nestlé!! When I was growing up, the adverts on telly clearly shouted about "Nessels" Milky Bar and the Milky Bar kid (who was strong and tough!)
On a more real note, just name the capital cities of Europe using both your own native language and then the local language and see how many match up perfectly :-)
IKEA has maps, which tell you where you are and where the shortcuts are.
Use the f***ing maps, Luke.
Those who do not pay attention are doomed to repeat their wandering until they dry up and blow away like tumbleweed.
We who have been IKEA customers since 1972 (when there were only two IKEA stores in the world) remember a time when there were no f***ing maps in IKEA. No feebleness permitted then, I can tell you.
Only got dragged there once. There were no maps but no chance of getting lost. The only possible route was boustrophedon with no short cuts. The choices were to turn back before the half way point, walk the entire length or smash through a partition wall (my preferred choice if the fire alarm sounded). This was a long time ago so hopefully a fire safety officer expressed my feelings on the layout and made them do something about it.
The true bork
Anyway - worth giving a read: IKEA’s Flat-Pack Tax Scheme: a Corporate Structure Designed to Facilitate Profit-shifting and Tax Avoidance
Haha that's so good it deserves a link:
Ironically since when Stanstead opened it was the easiest airport. Designed like a train station, there were rows of checkin the full length of the building, then quick security a row of gates the full length of the building.
There were no budget airlines, no shops and about 2 places to eat
> We've certainly spent many an hour toiling around the Croydon branch
Not so funny for me, I came close to an actual panic attack at one point, albeit in the Warrington branch. I ended up at the checkouts, realised i'd left an important wallpaper sample behind in the textiles department, took a shortcut through a staircase rather than the whole snake path back, and got utterly lost for 30 minutes feeling nauseous and overstimulated, but then maybe I'm a bit autistic.
"How do you get a flat-pack kitchen on a motor cycle?"
Use your favorite search engines for loads of photos on how to load 3 tons of stuff on a motorcycle. In Asia, it's easy to find examples. Why make two trips when you can pack everything on while leaving a 2cm^2 porthole to see out of?
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