back to article Ordinary salaried Brits: Sweet! Payday! Banking giant HSBC: Oh no it isn't

HSBC has confirmed it is experiencing problems with its online and mobile banking operations after customers took to social media to complain about the lack of service. A statement on HSBC's Twitter feed admitted: We're aware some customers are having problems using Online & Mobile Banking. We're really sorry and are working …

  1. elsergiovolador Silver badge

    Cartel

    Ordinary salaried Brits

    I dig the joke :-)

    1. Chris G

      Re: Cartel

      I am willing to bet certain members of Mexican society and a few billionaires in SA and China are having no problems accessing their money.

      1. gandalfcn Silver badge

        Re: Cartel

        That may well be the case as their accounts are probably not in the UK. HSBC actually has operations in rather a lot of countries. So maybe the problem is with the UK.

        Whilst The Bank may have started on drug money and still launders it the UK is not its main market, especially post Brexit.

  2. Imhotep

    Stop Me If You've Heard This Before

    The ElReg ought to keep something handy for HSBC like newspapers do for celebrity obits.

    "HSBC systems are down and customers can't access their money". Then just change the death date each time.

    I'm somewhat surprised they still have customers. They're a patient and forgiving lot.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Stop Me If You've Heard This Before

      A customer, for now. I called HSBC to discuss "persistent credit card debt", at their request. I felt humiliated doing so. But better. Whilst discussing the potential of a repayment plan - involving details of our monthly expenditure, the young man working for HSBC mocked me for not earning enough to pay more than I already do. So. I will eventually repay the debt and then never ever ever use HSBC again. They can have my Griffin Savers items as our parting gift. F*k 'em.

      1. My-Handle

        Re: Stop Me If You've Heard This Before

        "the young man working for HSBC mocked me for not earning enough to pay more than I already do"

        Don't worry. He's working for HSBC. Methinks you have the high ground here :D

      2. gandalfcn Silver badge

        Re: Stop Me If You've Heard This Before

        Midland always was a shite bank, as was HSBC, so it was a match made in the UK.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Well, duh

    I haven't banked with the Highly Suspicious Banking Crooks for about a decade, and it's still one of my best decisions ever.

  4. arachnoid2

    Green ticks

    Yes but not changing them means at the end of the year they can claim 100% customer support.

  5. Richard Pennington 1
    Coat

    But if they moved to amber status ...

    ... they would have to virus-check all the accounts, or quarantine them for 10 days.

    Mine's the NBC suit.

POST COMMENT House rules

Not a member of The Register? Create a new account here.

  • Enter your comment

  • Add an icon

Anonymous cowards cannot choose their icon