back to article Playmobil crosses the final frontier with enormous, metre-long Enterprise playset

Playmobil is set to boldly go where no three-inch man has gone before with the release of a metre-long replica of the NCC-1701 USS Enterprise from the original Star Trek series. The enormous model of the Federation Constitution-class vessel will come with standard-scale figures representing the main original series characters …

  1. 2+2=5 Silver badge
    Joke

    Shuttle?

    > The huge set contains 136 pieces, including a stand in the shape of the Enterprise's emblem, a cradle to allow the model to be hung from a ceiling, various bridge furniture, phasers, tricorders, and communicators for the crew and even a few tribbles.

    What no shuttle bay and shuttle? And no spare red-shirted landing-party crewmembers?

    1. Psmo
      Pirate

      Re: Shuttle?

      No spare red-shirted crew members

      Evidently they're just finishing the episode.

    2. MyffyW

      Re: Shuttle?

      red-shirted landing-party

      He has a name in our house - Ensign Cannonfodder - and a braver man you will not meet, save for those who bought Shatner's ill-advised "music" records.

      1. EricB123 Bronze badge

        Re: Shuttle?

        A chance to buy a Shatner record? A safer investment than Bitcoin to say the least!

      2. AW-S

        Re: Shuttle?

        "those who bought Shatner's ill-advised "music" records"

        I listened to "The Transformed Man" recently and decided it was actually on a par with the somewhat disturbing album from Peter Wyngarde called "When Sex Leers Its Inquisitive Head".

    3. Gringo99

      Re: Shuttle?

      I was going to say, maybe there is a subscription service where they send you fresh redshirts characters every month...

      1. Soruk
        Joke

        Re: Shuttle?

        Amazon Prime Directive?

  2. Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
    Happy

    Tribbles?

    Will these be multiplying like real tribbles?

    WE ARE DOOMED!!!

    but edit : dangit why do toys get better the older I get? BAAAAAAAAAAAAAH, I wanna go back to childhood and play with this!!!

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Because older people have more money and so can buy $500 LEGO sets that children can't

      What do you sell to a well-off 40 year old that doesn't golf ?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        What do you sell to a well-off 40 year old that doesn't golf ?

        <Hastily throws coat over latest deliveries of camera gear>

        No idea. Lovely weather out, don't you think?

        1. Sgt_Oddball Silver badge
          Coat

          Re: What do you sell to a well-off 40 year old that doesn't golf ?

          Yes, yes lovely now that it's stopped raining. Did you need that coat?

          <uses spare coat to smuggle latest vinyl additions onto the shelves before the missus notices>

        2. elbisivni

          Re: What do you sell to a well-off 40 year old that doesn't golf ?

          Feeling very personally attacked by this post. Very.

          (this weekend I dedicated an entire spare room to my always growing Fujifilm collection)

      2. John 110

        A custom shop fender strat...

      3. Sam Therapy

        Custom shop "vintage" guitars, low wattage boutique amps, ridiculously expensive pedals...

        No, I don't buy 'em - I'm a working musician, not a bedroom player (well, shutdown excepting, of course) - but there's a huge market for expensive music gear.

      4. J__M__M

        A mint condition Supra for $100,000.00?

    2. JetSetJim
      Headmaster

      They are not Tribbles, they are flat cats.

      1. Shooter

        Flat cats

        Holy crap! I (vaguely) remember checking that book out of the school library when I was about 10 years old.

        Never made the connection to tribbles, though.

  3. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

    Space force

    I picture a bunch of these being sold in Colorado and a lot of Space Force (tm) generals wooshing them around the office when nobody is looking.

    Warning contains small parts. Choking hazard, not suitable for under 36months or 2nd Lieutenants

    1. elbisivni

      Re: Space force

      Not just the 2nd Lieutenants. I've seen plenty of Captains I wouldn't trust to safely or competently operate a wheelbarrow (disclaimer - I was one myself once, and still have a special two wheeled wheelbarrow as a risk reduction measure.)

  4. TM2015

    Lester

    Alas, if only Lester Haines were still here to see this....

  5. imanidiot Silver badge

    uhhmm

    "a stand in the shape of the Enterprise's emblem". Isn't that the Starfleet emblem? I don't think Enterprise had it's own emblem?

    1. the spectacularly refined chap Silver badge

      Re: uhhmm

      In the original series each ship did indeed have it's own emblem, you'd notice occasionally when other ships featured - on the bridge turbolift doors IIRC. By the next generation era the Enterprise emblem had been adopted for Starfleet as a whole.

      1. Shippwreck1

        Re: uhhmm

        Not according to Mr Roddenberry...

        https://intl.startrek.com/article/starfleet-insignia-explained

  6. 7teven 4ect

    tribbles, how to remove?

    Having a mature poplar tree, she drops seeds in the tens of millions each summer. My job is picking them up. The seeds start life in racks of about two dozen then have a complex life-cycle and no two are the same. They all ultimately peak at the tribble phase, where they have transformed from little green pods to fluffy, slightly sticky, white balls.

    This looks incredibly beautiful like snow in summer, but it strangles the grass on the lawn. One lawnmower is dead, another feeling the strain. Help, please? How to remove?

    My point is, what inspired the tribbles episode? Could it have been a similar struggle?

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: tribbles, how to remove?

      The only way to be sure is ..... to take off and nuke the site from orbit.

      1. 7teven 4ect

        Re: tribbles, how to remove?

        but cat :3

      2. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

        Re: tribbles, how to remove?

        "The only way to be sure is ..... to take off and nuke the site from orbit."

        Or strap a couple of Stage trees to the side, light them and send the tree itself into orbit. Always try to reduce the complexity of the plan to increase the chances of success.

        1. 7teven 4ect

          Re: tribbles, how to remove?

          a couple of stages? I only have a pair, and that's dead!

        2. Paul_Murphy

          Re: tribbles, how to remove?

          And let the star seeds travel the galaxy.

      3. Ashto5

        Re: tribbles, how to remove?

        Or “it’s game over man”

    2. Robert Carnegie Silver badge

      Re: tribbles, how to remove?

      Have you tried running a mower over the grass around your tree to pick the seeds up before they sprout? Or is that what broke your last mower? Does it come off the tree as fluff?

      A little reading indicates your tree is indeed female and evidently on good terms with male trees nearby, so, perhaps a giant polythene tree condom would work - on your lady rather than the local toms - but fitting it on looks like quite a job, possibly involving drones. I'm not sure what other contraception may be available for trees.

    3. ShadowSystems Silver badge

      Re: tribbles, how to remove?

      At 7teven 4ect, we have a similar issue with trees that drop "little spikey balls" that can destroy a lawnmower as easily as a rhino can RiverDance a rabbit into pulp. Go buy yourself a lawn & leaf vacume unit. Suck up all the little bits before they get a chance to take hold. Empty the canister into a large plastic (lawn & leaf) bag & dispose of it in your green waste (plant material) recycle bin.

      It's annoying, time consuming, & a right pain in the ass, but it also prevents having to buy a new mower every bloody season to replace the last one that got beaten to death by the little spikey balls.

      *Hands you a pint*

      Drink up, it'll hopefully numb your aching brain from the desire to just use a FlameThrower, explosives, or an orbital nuke. =-Jp

      1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
        Happy

        Re: tribbles, how to remove?

        Shadow Systems,

        To change the subject slightly, I would be very interested to see the footage you have of riverdancing rhinos.

        1. ShadowSystems Silver badge

          Re: tribbles, how to remove?

          At I ain't Spartacus, just check PornTube under the Rule 34 section. You'll find lots of RiverDancing Rhino rabbit stomping videos there to (amuse/traumatize) you. =-)p

          1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

            Re: tribbles, how to remove?

            ShadowSystems,

            Why thank you. But I wasn't asking about hot rhino on rhino action. Sweet, sweet rhino love does not appeal to me. But hot, hot rhino tapdancing - now that's another thing entirely...

            I am aware that dancing is merely the vertical expression of a horizontal desire - but seeing rhino-porn is too likely to lead to mother-in-law jokes. And then I'll have to cancel myself - and it would all be just too sad.

    4. PerlyKing
      Mushroom

      Re: tribbles, how to remove?

      We've got that going on right now, it looks like it's been snowing!

      Wait until the seeds are dry but the grass is damp, then throw a match on it. See icon :-)

  7. picturethis
    Go

    I am holding out for the drone version...

    The title says it all.

    Fully functional (flying) drone of NCC1701

    And then I want the A, B, C (and especially) the D versions (with the outboard phaser that Riker uses)..

    1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: I am holding out for the drone version...

      "Fully functional (flying) drone of NCC1701"

      IIRC, that's already been done....hang on a mo'...ah, youtube to the rescue...

      Quadcopter version you can buy and Model aircraft version you can build.

    2. Aussie Doc
      Black Helicopters

      Re: I am holding out for the drone version...

      Don't tell anybody but in 3D printer circles I hang a round in, this is indeed a thing.

      Honest, legal beagle gov'ner, it's a chopper really <wink wink>

    3. Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: I am holding out for the drone version...

      Klingon Bird of Prey with working cloaking device for me, thankyooverramuch....

      1. Trigonoceps occipitalis

        Re: I am holding out for the drone version...

        I have one for sale. Low mileage, one lady owner, you'll have to get the decloaking fixed though.

        Arthur Daly

        PS: Also available: several bridges and a tall steel structure in Paris.

  8. Sgt_Oddball Silver badge

    But, but but!...

    Does it have a toilet on there somewhere?

    (one of the many reasons Babylon 5 was awesome - first series and they covered this very issue as well as the 'button and zip' conversation...)

    Actually I do wonder if they'd ever do Babylon 5? Starfury to play with admire anyone?

    1. Siberian Hamster

      Re: But, but but!...

      Have a look on Thingiverse, some people have modelled Babylon 5's Star Furys in incredibly good detail for 3D printing.

      Those and the Space 1999 Eagles are my most favourite space ships ever.

    2. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
      Happy

      Re: But, but but!...

      In its short history Firefly also did space toilets. Very important, and under-appreciated, aspect of science fiction.

  9. xyz

    Want...

    Want want...

    Btw, Babylon 5 series 3 was the nads

    Btw. Btw, the person above with slighty sticky white balls coming from his wood should... Cant type anymore... Tribbles bred so fast because of the predators on their home planet.

  10. Chronos

    Cue...

    ...stop motion fan flicks. Quite how Kirk is going to shag anything that moves with "Made in China" on his crotch is left as an exercise for the reader.

    Of course, it couldn't be any worse than the Kelvin reboots and at least you'll be able to see what's going on rather than looking like it was filmed in the 1970s during the rolling blackouts, which seems to be de-rigeur right now.

  11. Intractable Potsherd

    Only...

    ... the certainty of divorce is stopping me pre-ordering this - for my space-mad son, of course!

    (If it was a metre-long B5, I'd accept the single life again. There are some things that cannot be resisted.)

  12. arachnoid2

    Norm from Adam Savages "Tested" is building a more intricate (and expensive) Star ship at the moment in one of those American get so many parts an issue build. He also has some damn beutiful figurines which he builds dioramas for.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CAGd_7djUF8

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEyjFST9DR0

  13. staringatclouds

    *COUGH*

    "including a stand in the shape of the Enterprise's emblem"

    COUGHSTARFLEETCOUGH

    I really must see a Doctor about this cough

  14. Sam Therapy

    "It's Lego, Jim, but not as we know it."

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