back to article Indian government says 5G doesn’t cause COVID-19. Also points out India has no 5G networks

As COVID-19 continues to ravage India, the nation’s government has told it populace that 5G signals have nothing to do with the spread of the virus – if only because no 5G networks operate in India. A statement from the nation’s Department of Telecommunications states “several misleading messages are being circulated on …

  1. The Man Who Fell To Earth Silver badge
    Black Helicopters

    Conspiracy Theory 101

    "As COVID-19 continues to ravage India, the nation’s government has told it populace that 5G signals have nothing to do with the spread of the virus – if only because no 5G networks operate in India."

    That's what they want you to think.

    1. The Man Who Fell To Earth Silver badge
      FAIL

      Re: Conspiracy Theory 101

      5 up, 8 down.

      Hmmm. Didn't pass the Turing Sarcasm Test.

      https://images.newscientist.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/11/11161326/tgns287sarcasm.jpg

  2. Potemkine! Silver badge

    "5G doesn’t cause COVID-19"

    But so-called "social" media cause obscurantism.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: "5G doesn’t cause COVID-19"

      Those countries with growing 5G networks are seeing a rapid decrease in VOVID-19 - so 5G is actually the cure. Surely..

  3. FeepingCreature

    Important to remember that just as conspiracy can be instrumentalized as a tool of state power, so can anti-conspiracy be instrumentalized as a tool of state power.

  4. Def Silver badge
    Coat

    If the possibility of Covid-19 being caused by 5G has been ruled out, then surely the only logical conclusion is that Covid-19 causes 5G.

    Which makes sense if you buy into all the microchips-in-vaccines nonsense. :)

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      One of the best ones I heard and I shit you not is the previous pandemics with 4g and 3g.

      1. batfink Silver badge

        Hmmm

        That could be an interesting path to go down. Would that mean that the Spanish Flu was caused by, say, -23G?

        1. VicMortimer
          Black Helicopters

          Re: Hmmm

          Obviously.

          I mean, it lines up perfectly with the first widespread use of radio in warfare, doesn't it?

          1. The Man Who Fell To Earth Silver badge
            Black Helicopters

            Re: Hmmm

            I remember fondly my -1258G phone that I got just before the Black Death of 1346-1353.

            More than a coincidence?

            1. quxinot Silver badge

              Re: Hmmm

              You're looking comparably well for a person your age. What skin cream are you using?

              1. RichardBarrell

                Re: Hmmm

                If it's not a skin cream then I want to know - who painted that portrait you keep in the attic?

      2. gnasher729 Silver badge

        No, 4g doesn’t cause a pandemic. But it makes you stupid and gullible so you believe all the 5G conspiracies.

    2. Bill Gray

      Obligatory xkcd

      https://xkcd.com/925/

    3. vtcodger Silver badge

      5G research

      "the only logical conclusion is that Covid-19 causes 5G."

      But if that were the case, wouldn't 5G be turning up here and there in India? Perhaps there is an incubation period? Or maybe early-stage 5G is hard to detect?

      Clearly, more research is needed. Where do I send my grant application?

  5. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

    Very likely 5G technology will adversely affect some people's brains, or at least minds. It's quite evident that 4G already has.

    1. Dr_N Silver badge

      Well some people's use of 4G in public grips my shit. Does that count?

  6. DoctorNine

    As reference to Arthur C. Clarke's Third Law

    Once the unwashed masses have correctly identified that technology is indeed magic, it should come as no surprise to anyone, that they suspect the intent of the evil sorcerers behind it all. Their only mistake of course, is related to WHICH magic is causing the problem.

  7. Bendacious

    pipe dream

    Damaging conspiracies are a lot harder to challenge if you've lost all integrity by silencing critics, or using barefaced lies as a political tool. There's plenty of evidence that my leaders don't act in my best interests but that chap on youtube seems genuinely concerned about my wellbeing. Until we can organise good science and critical thinking education for everyone maybe politicians could hold off on the shady behaviour.

    1. Shalghar

      Re: pipe dream

      "Until we can organise good science and critical thinking education for everyone maybe politicians could hold off on the shady behaviour."

      But even if everyone was sufficiently educated, you still need to dampen the exxagerations of panic mongers and lockdown-terrorists. That is at least two types of "shady behaviour" accounted for and the phrase "noone in their right mind" has a meaning. People in fear are not in any kind of "right mind".

      As a member of "Die Partei", so eloquently stated when confronted with the fact that "Die Partei" is derived from a satirical and comical project by one politician of one of the established parties:" Dont you think its a clear sign of your parties failure that a party like ours actually gets enough votes to send someone to EU parliament ?"

      (Translation might not be 100% correct but i believe you get what i mean)

    2. This post has been deleted by its author

  8. Schultz
    Go

    "Until we can organise good science and critical thinking education ..."

    ... or we could encourage the nutcases to continue being creative and thinking outside the box. Even the best comedians would be hard-pressed to come up with such quality material.

    If you shoot down the obviously ridiculous ideas too fast, you just help them invent more plausible scenarios. So listen patiently, nod at the appropriate times and hold your scathing comments.

    1. The Aussie Paradox
      Joke

      Re: "Until we can organise good science and critical thinking education ..."

      ... So listen patiently, nod at the appropriate times and hold your scathing comments.

      Damn it Jim, I am not made of stone!

  9. the Jim bloke
    Facepalm

    The Indian government department of yoga and homeopathy

    factual information is not welcome here

    The Ministry of Ayurveda, Yoga, Naturopathy, Unani, Siddha, Sowa-Rigpa and Homoeopathy (abbreviated as AYUSH) is purposed with developing education, research and propagation of indigenous alternative medicine systems in India.

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