back to article Listen, son... Monster trucks just aren't cool anymore. Real winners drive Tesla Roadsters

Soon tots will be able to throw their toy cars at the 4K TV and claim it was Autopilot what did it, Daddy. Tiny automobile purveyor Matchbox is changing tack from the petrol-guzzling steeds of yore to introduce a line based on real electric vehicles like the Tesla Roadster. As if Tesla boss Elon Musk's head wasn't big enough …

  1. Christopher Reeve's Horse

    Happy Meal tat

    I'd still much rather have paper based crap than plastic based crap, thank you very much

    And actually, the kids have really enjoyed the recent 3D dinosaurs...

    1. Paul Herber Silver badge

      Re: Happy Meal tat

      ' 3D dinosaurs..'

      Must be a triceratops then ...

      Mine's the one with the scaly skin and 6" teeth.

    2. Excellentsword (Written by Reg staff)

      Re: Happy Meal tat

      One of mine will watch me build it then put it on the shelf. Then the other will take it and tear it to shreds.

      1. Dan 55 Silver badge
        Joke

        Re: Happy Meal tat

        So a future manager and a future politican there.

        1. jake Silver badge

          Re: Happy Meal tat

          How could you wish that on anyone's child, even in jest? How rude!

  2. Anonymous Custard Silver badge
    Boffin

    Calling the LOHAN crew

    Right then guys and gals, we now need a recreation of putting the roadster into orbit in miniature.

    Who's up for it, in the true Lester spirit?

    RIP Mr Haines

    1. Zarno
      Mushroom

      Re: Calling the LOHAN crew

      Time to rustle up some well casing, concrete, and a Davy Crockett M29.

      We'll make it a Plumbbob of a time!

      Now we just need to make sure it does not burn up on exit from the atmosphere...

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Ecofriendly

    My Number One SonCat prefers a plain cardboard box over any "toys" marketed especially for them.

    His eco credentials end there

    *Number One Son - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charlie_Chan

    1. Anonymous Custard Silver badge
      Headmaster

      Re: Ecofriendly

      Ah yes, but isn't it a fact that every parent learns that you spend stupid money on buying toys for toddlers (and pets), and then they remove it from the box, take one look at it and spend hours playing with the box, ignoring the toy?

      I can also honestly say that each of the last 5 cats we've had over the years has liked nothing better than an Ikea paper bag to play with and hide in.

      1. Zarno

        Re: Ecofriendly

        Bubble wrap.

        Even as an adult, I still pop it.

        And those sealed air bubble pillow things make an excellent BANG when squeezed just right.

        1. John H Woods

          Re: bubblewrap and airpillows

          I've got a labradroid that loves both so much he is beside himself when the postie brings a box ...

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Roadster

    The new one, or just the rebadged electric Lotus Elise?

  5. 42656e4d203239 Silver badge

    Recycled or recyclable?

    In the days of my youth when one saved up enough pocket money to buy a Matchbox car it arrived in a cardboard box... quite similar to a matchbox.... odd thing that.

    Die cast metal would be more difficult to find as a recycled product I guess, though Matchbox seem to think this is not a problem, and as for bio-friendly plastics the world is awash with them already - just pick one that suits.

    I am, however, wondering about bio-friendly paint and also why the stainless steel wouldn't be recycled - after all we aren't looking for medical grade stainless steel are we?

    How hard can it be? obviously hard enough for a corporate bigwig to make a statement about it - or perhaps this whole thing is just a bucket of greenwash?

    1. AnotherName

      Re: Recycled or recyclable?

      Looking at the photo on the BBC report for this, the quality of the casting for the Tesla is terrible compared to the original Matchbox cars I used to collect as a lad, when they were made by Lesney back in the 50's and 60's. There was more fine detail in the modelling back then. I didn't know the brand still existed.

      1. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge
        Coat

        Re: Recycled or recyclable?

        May be Matchbox are trying to be true to the original!

        See this post and others to the same article...

        https://forums.theregister.com/forum/containing/4114920

    2. Pen-y-gors

      Re: Recycled or recyclable?

      'Recyclable' is one of the most weasely weasel words in the whole green-wash business. What does it mean? It means it's made of virgin trees and oil, which can - if you feel so inclined - be put in the recycling bag when the kid is bored. Monster trucks - real ones - are 'recyclable'.

      1. Wellyboot Silver badge

        Re: Recycled or recyclable?

        Why would they bother, they last near forever.

        My matchbox collection is in (mostly) working order, they still roll along the floor when pushed*.

        One sprog did ask why he saw real (original) Minis but never real Austin 1800 & Victor cars, being told they stopped making then 20/30 years before he was born resulted in 'what else do they still make' - only the Landrover.

        *I didn't say they rolled straight or have much paint left & I binned the most valuable bit - the boxes!.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Recycled or recyclable?

      "Die cast metal would be more difficult to find as a recycled product I guess"

      Not sure if sarcasm... but metal is pretty notable for being recyclable. Die casting does mean you can't just use any old alloy, but I'd imagine the tolerance on a hot wheels car would be looser than say a piece destined for an airplane.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Recycled or recyclable?

        "I'd imagine the tolerance on a hot wheels car would be looser than say a piece destined for an airplane"

        Depends where you buy that part. There is a market for "budget" spare parts, which look just like the real thing but take some shortcuts in resistance and capacity...

        1. jake Silver badge

          Re: Recycled or recyclable?

          "There is a market for "budget" spare parts"

          Not in MY aircraft!

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: Recycled or recyclable?

            It's obviously not the end users who would chose to install such a part, and since they don't bear a "Substandard quality, use at your own risk!" sticker, you'll only know you had one of those after it suffers a unexpected catastrophic failure.

    4. The Axe

      Re: Recycled or recyclable?

      A lot of metal is recycled. Because it's cheaper to melt it and re-form it than to make it from ore. Aluminium is one of the most frequently recycled metals.

  6. Real Ale is Best
    Go

    Can I have a red one on top of a model Falcon Heavy, please?

    1. Jellied Eel Silver badge

      No

      You can have a limited, 3-box collectors edition comprising of 6 cars, 6 tubes* and 3 cardboard boxes. Yours for only $53.99m, look for the Tesla Vegas Expo edition in a store near you.

      *Tubes not included. LED lighting pack for only $79.99 extra. Safety scissors optional. See also-

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=91-qwftOYVc

  7. Chris G

    If you look on YouTube, the videos that get the most views and comments are those with diesel belching monster trucks and tyre shredding muscle cars.

    They appeal most to boys of all ages.

    I will be interested to see comparative sales figures between hybrid hatchbacks and muscle cars.

    1. IGotOut Silver badge

      Apples and pears.

      Just bear in mind many of the worlds fastest new cars are hybrids.

      1. Androgynous Cupboard Silver badge

        Hybrids?

        Paff. Why lug around an IC engine if you don’t have to? The fast ones after pure electric.

        1. jake Silver badge

          Re: Hybrids?

          "Why lug around an IC engine if you don’t have to?"

          Because the electrics have no soul. They take too long to recharge between rounds, too.

          1. Citizen99

            Re: Hybrids?

            For soul, I vote the reciprocating steam engine.

            1. jake Silver badge

              Re: Hybrids?

              Well, yes. :-)

        2. Jellied Eel Silver badge

          Re: Hybrids?

          Paff. Why lug around an IC engine if you don’t have to? The fast ones after pure electric.

          Pah. ICE cars get better power to weight and efficiency as they're driven, EVs get worse. Consequence of an ICE losing weight as fuel is consumed, but EVs having to haul heavy batteries regardless of charge. Which I guess is a bit of a non-standard efficiency metric, but may be more relevant for Tesla semis. So the impact of semi's weight would presumably impact on the maximum loads hauled.

  8. Stephen Wilkinson

    How well will they do at the DRC? https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjN5K3IYZgz-vCWhI_DD01A

  9. Zarno

    Is it just me...

    Is it just me, or are others now thinking about the absolute gobs of torque a full diesel electric hybrid monster truck could pump out?

    With the right control electronics and a proper IMU, you could even have it balance on the front or rear wheels.

    Add in a shifting mass, and you could possibly have it balance on two side wheels, or maybe a single wheel.

    Just think of the stunts that you could pull off...

    I'd be all for electric/hybrid monster trucks.

  10. jake Silver badge

    Not to worry.

    Just as kids pretend hands/fingers are pistols, and sticks are rifles/machine guns, they will pretend the toy, non-fuctional electric miniatures are actually 2.5 ton trucks, Monster Trucks, tanks, armored cars and the like. It's called "play", it stimulates the imagination and is an important part of growing up ... a point the hand-wringers and namby-pambys seem disinclined to understand.

  11. sgp

    Honestly

    Can we stop referring to electric cars as "green"?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Honestly

      I'm coming to the opinion that EVs might be the biggest money-making scam ever perpetrated. There is absolutely nothing environmentally friendly or sustainable about them.

      1. MarkSitkowski

        Re: Honestly

        I think the problem is, that nobody tells you where the electricity comes from. Usually, it's from a coal-burning power station or, worse, from a nuclear power station. How green is coal slag or radioactive waste? On a side thought: The world's supply of lithium is even lower than that of crude oil, so what happens when the lithium runs out?

        1. druck Silver badge

          Re: Honestly

          You've obviously never been close to either a coal or nuclear power station, as you'd know the difference between one which continually belches out tons of slightly radioactive waste in to the environment, and one which is spotlessly clean, meticulously monitored, and only produces a small amount of radioactive waste which is very carefully disposed of.

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