back to article It really is your last chance to see anything at Cineworld for quite some time, and this big-screen bork speaks volumes

Displays come in all shapes and sizes. Portrait, landscape or, in the case of today's bork, a last-chance-to-see wraparound. Spotted by Register reader Rob at a Cineworld branch in Ashton-under-Lyne, England, the display above the deserted concessions counter would normally serve up information or teasers for coming …

  1. chivo243 Silver badge
    Windows

    Looks to be working better than usual!

    Windows firewall prevented it from connecting to the network! Presto! it works now! At least that's what I can read in the pic...

  2. Steve K Silver badge

    Kiosk Mode

    Given that there are loads of Local Policies and/or GPOs for Kiosk-mode PCs, even if Windows is after some attention, it's not difficult to prevent it from splurging it all over the main output monitor!

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

    The need won't go away but I'd expect their reinvention. Maybe, as small, high-street store screening rooms, with good refreshments, and a massive repertoire of movies - basically a social, shared second living room.

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

      Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

      It is very weird that Cineworld haven't made more of an effort to get films in. My local one has gone to the back catalogue to show all the Rocky films, Empire Strikes Back and the 3 Back to the Futures. I've been looking every week to see what's on, as if we don't go out, then a whole bunch of places are going to go bust. So I did my bit by seeing Tenet twice, with dinner beforehand. And I went to see Empire in July - but there are so many old films they could have shown. They've now got digital projection and a network to download films to the cinema's servers - so I don't see why they haven't made a bit more effort. I'd love to see 2001 on a proper big screen, or Jaws maybe. All sorts of films from the 60s and 70s that I'm too young to have seen first time round.

      I suppose I did miss out on the opportunity to see Flash Gordon projected on a massive screen, I've just remembered they showed that on one day in July.

      Obviously it's the studios fault too. Tenet had taken $250m globally, as of 2 weeks ago - which is less than I'm sure they were hoping, but still pretty reasonable. And it's still running - obviously you can't pack the cinemas out in the first weekend to get the stupid numbers - but I'd imagine they were expecting $500m up by the time it closes. So it's at least in the right area.

      And if studios are worried that they'll make less by just selling to streaming services, that's what they'll be left with anyway - if they bankrupt the cinemas by not releasing stuff for them to show.

      1. Oliver Mayes

        Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

        My local Cineworld has been doing this all along. A couple of times a week they show classic films alongside the headliners. But that doesn't seem to be enough to keep such a huge business afloat.

      2. TheCynic

        Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

        One of my most enjoyable views last year was the Italian Job on the big screen, and I wasn't the only one the screen was packed. So there is a market for showing back catalog. It all depends on the costs to show the film.

      3. TonyJ Silver badge

        Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

        My eldest son and I went to watch Tenet last week.

        Including the two of us, there were maybe a dozen people in the cinema.

        But the flip side of course is that cinema's in general have been ripping people off for decades.

        £33.50 for two adult tickets (including 2*75p booking fees) because the local Odeon has no competition and Tenet was only showing on iMax.

        But then a couple of drinks and a couple of snacks coming to almost the same again? And yes, I do appreciate that people can take in their own snacks etc.

        When people are trying to watch the pennies, charging vastly overinflated prices to watch films is only going to go one way for the cinemas.

        1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

          Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

          >But the flip side of course is that cinema's in general have been ripping people off for decades.

          The cinema gets almost none of that ticket price.

          The opening weekend ( which actually means a week) ALL of the ticket price goes to the studio

          In subsequent weeks the proportion going to the screen increases.

          But the profit is entirely made on snacks/drinks and booking fees.

          1. TonyJ Silver badge

            Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

            "...The cinema gets almost none of that ticket price.

            The opening weekend ( which actually means a week) ALL of the ticket price goes to the studio

            In subsequent weeks the proportion going to the screen increases.

            But the profit is entirely made on snacks/drinks and booking fees..."

            I did not know that but it makes obvious and clear sense now you mention it, thank you for the clarification.

    2. IGotOut Silver badge

      Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

      The small cinemas are the hardest hit. My local one has closed permanently, and the others in the small chain are looking doubtful.

      The makers of Bond say they want people to have the full cinema experience, but come April, there may not be any left.

      1. Martin Summers Silver badge

        Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

        The full cinema experience being idiots coming in half an hour into the film and sitting in front of you taking their time to do so. People taking selfies in their seats with the flash on. People staring at their phones so all you can see is the light from that in the corner of your eye. People talking between themselves at normal volume during the film. I could go on.

        That's the reason I choose not to go the cinema. If they had bouncers who chucked out all the idiots then I'd go. An interval wouldn't go amiss either, you'd think they'd still do that and relish the opportunity to sell people food they can noisily open and munch away on during the film too.

        Cinemas don't help themselves, I have always wondered why they didn't make more of an effort to show older films that people didn't have chance to see first time around. Surely that's a massive cash cow, especially since films are digitally distributed. That some are only waking up to this idea now shows just how little their owners seem to care about their customers wants. Like any business, fail to adapt and listen to your customers, you've had it.

        1. jdiebdhidbsusbvwbsidnsoskebid Bronze badge

          Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

          Going to the cinema just seems so expensive to me. A family of four to see a new release can be nearly £50. I know things need to be paid for and the cinemas, like any business, have to make profit. But, it just didn't feel like value for money to me. Maybe I'm not their target market in that case.

          The ability to stream at home at the flick of a switch has definitely devalued the cinema experience for me.

        2. heyrick Silver badge

          Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

          And that bloody child who has the most noisy crinkle-wrap around the rubbish they're stuffing into their faces, and eating with the mouth open. And that tweenie who is on the phone giving a running commentary of everything that passes through her mind (most of it nothing to do with the film) to her BFF.

          And that old guy who sounds like he has the plague, and every ninety seconds on schedule, a-hurrrrrr! followed what can only be imagined as attempting to sniff back a gallon of snot before it splatters the floor.

          It's all of your reasons, and these, why I don't go anywhere near cinemas any more. With streaming, okay the screen is smaller but I can watch what I want, when, including pausing and rewinding and skipping past boring bits like the eighty distributor idents at the start. The food is just as I like it, plenty of tea if I feel like it, and no goddamn children with hopeless parents unable to discipline them (or at least get them to shut the .... up).

          1. 2+2=5 Silver badge

            Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

            > And that bloody child [...]

            As you're an adult I suggest you don't go to the matinees.

            Another handy tip: wait a week for the rush to subside and then choose a later showing as you'll get a half-empty theatre and a well-behaved audience.

          2. ovation1357

            Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

            If you've not already seen it, this puts me straight in mind of this great Family Guy clip: https://youtu.be/vI7JDTlixb8 (the bit after 'Tim Honks')

          3. Dave559 Silver badge

            Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

            I like the idents at the start! It's part of the "leaving the real world and entering movie world" experience for me. And I think it's fair to say that some of them, like Universal, Paramount, 20th Century Fox, etc, are classic microcosms of art in their own right.

          4. Evil Genius

            Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

            You missed out the guy in front knocking one out.

        3. 2+2=5 Silver badge

          Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

          The full cinema experience being idiots coming in half an hour into the film and sitting in front of you taking their time to do so. People taking selfies in their seats with the flash on. People staring at their phones so all you can see is the light from that in the corner of your eye. People talking between themselves at normal volume during the film. I could go on.

          You need to go to a better class of cinema - or maybe you're just out of date. Last time I went there was a threat of shooting followed by charges of copyright theft for anyone who so much as dared look like they might be filming on a phone.

          That's the reason I choose not to go the cinema. If they had bouncers who chucked out all the idiots then I'd go. An interval wouldn't go amiss either, you'd think they'd still do that and relish the opportunity to sell people food they can noisily open and munch away on during the film too.

          Surely an interval simply doubles the likelihood of someone being late to their seat? Besides the cinema wouldn't leave the screen blank but would show ads. If I'm going to have the film interrupted by ads then I might as well watch it at home.

          Cinemas don't help themselves, I have always wondered why they didn't make more of an effort to show older films that people didn't have chance to see first time around. Surely that's a massive cash cow, especially since films are digitally distributed. That some are only waking up to this idea now shows just how little their owners seem to care about their customers wants. Like any business, fail to adapt and listen to your customers, you've had it.

          Remember "the long tail"? The idea that there were enough people on the Internet to make something worth selling|providing even when there weren't enough customers in any one single location? Well, that didn't happen either.

        4. Cuddles Silver badge

          Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

          "People talking between themselves at normal volume during the film."

          And of course the other side of that one is that if you're not a complete knob, you can't talk during the film. There's very little appeal in having an evening out with friends in which you spend 3 hours not actually able to talk or even look at each other.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: little appeal [in spending] 3 hours not actually able to talk or even look at each other.

            Well we could take off the blindfolds and remove the gags, but isn't that a bit, well, *vanilla*?

            :-)

          2. Dave559 Silver badge

            Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

            You're supposed to watch the film, and then discuss it in the pub afterwards, not while the film is screening!

            1. Cuddles Silver badge

              Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

              Which is exactly my point. Cinemas are shit because you're expected to sit in silence for several hours, then actual enjoy yourself somewhere else later. Which is precisely why they're dying, because it's far preferable to just have some friends over to your house instead and watch a film in an actual enjoyable setting.

              Obiously I'll get more downvotes for talking about downvotes, but I can only assume that all the downvoters didn't bother actually reading my previous post and decided I must be advocating talking at the cinema, when actually I was just pointing out that cinemas are shit precisely because you shouldn't do that and it would therefore be difficult to come up with a worse way of socialising. People historically went to cinemas because that was the only way to see many films. That's no longer the case, so it's not surprising that most people prefer to see films elsewhere instead.

              1. Anonymous Coward
                Anonymous Coward

                Re: cinemas are shit precisely because you shouldn't [talk during films]

                I appreciate that maybe it's not something that works for you personally, but some - or even many - people are happy with a bit of companionable silence for a while during a shared activity. So although cinemas might be "shit" from your perspective, others will differ.

                1. heyrick Silver badge

                  Re: cinemas are shit precisely because you shouldn't [talk during films]

                  To follow up on AC - if you're talking during the film, you're not going to be paying as much attention as if you shut up for the hour and a half (or two for a blockbuster) that the film runs for.

                  Anybody who talks during first viewing is signalling either that their opinions are not worth paying attention to, or that the film itself is not worth paying attention to.

                  Far far better to watch, appreciate, and then discuss it afterwards. When you know the reveal, or twist ending, or whatever, and can factor that into your thoughts about the film. After all, who knew Eli was blind, or that the dude was a ghost?

        5. Dave559 Silver badge

          Badly behaved cinemagoers

          Every time cinemas are discussed on the interwebs, some folk mention how badly behaved some other cinemagoers are. Those commenters are right, that sort of behaviour is (or should be) unacceptable in polite company in public and it would really ruin a trip to the cinema for me.

          But on the other hand, I have fortunately (touch wood) never experienced it myself in any of my local cinemas. Is it really that common, or are some towns just unfortunately somewhat unlucky in their mix of local residents?

          The worst I've had to put up with is people who are yabbering too noisily before the film starts (sure, chat during the adverts, but at least try to keep it to a quiet murmur nevertheless) and who don't shut up when the trailers start, which are part of the entertainment as far as I'm concerned. (And if I had my way, we should have ninja assassins on hand for anyone who hasn't zipped it the instant that BBFC logo appears on screen, and not a second later.)

      2. jdiebdhidbsusbvwbsidnsoskebid Bronze badge

        Re: Cinemas in their current form are an artefact of the limited availability of reels of film

        "The makers of Bond say they want people to have the full cinema experience".

        I presume they actually mean "The makers of Bond want to have the full cinema takings".

        The point about cinemas maybe not being there next year still stands.

  4. uccsoundman

    The last time I went to the Cinema was to see an obscure movie at the AMC that I *really* wanted to see ASAP. Took a friend from Church and we went to the Saturday Matinee. Movie was scheduled to start at 10:35 am. We had our seats at 10:27am. They played television commercials until 11am THEN started the movie. I vowed from that moment to never ever darken the door of a Cinema again. Add to that the cost of two tickets, even for the matinee, could have easily covered the DVD that came out a year later. The snack bar wasn't open yet, so food cost wasn't an issue.

    The movie houses are still operating as if they had a captive audience. At one time if you wanted to see a movie, or get into air-conditioning, you had to got to a Cinema (or way-back, a Drive-Inn). Now I can get the good aspects of the Cinema at home without the kids and paying to watch TV commercials (yes I was very annoyed by that).

    1. David 132 Silver badge

      I'm very fortunate that near me is a proper drive-in movie theater. They make an effort to recreate the 1950s look-and-feel, too - pastiche adverts / PSAs before the movies etc. They show a mix of older and new movies; for example, currently there's a Hallowe'en theme with Hocus Pocus and Beetlejuice. It's awesome, and the very antithesis of the soulless multiplex experience.

  5. Matt_payne666

    I really want to see something at the cinema, but at home I have a nice big screen, decent surround and sub for LFE, everything is tuned, calibrated and no neighbours to bother.

    Something new and loud, bring it on! but I just cant stomach paying more than the Bluray to watch something old, that while nowhere near what the cinema can give me, my home experience is more than adequate...

    If tickets were closer to a fiver for an old film, then yes Id visit with a few mates...

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

      My local Cineworld were doing that. Even more surprising, when I watched Empire Strikes Back there were no adverts or trailers. Was a disappointment to turn up for Tenet and get the full "experience" of ten minutes of crap adverts followed by trailers (which I don't mind) and then a couple more crap adverts.

      At least in the old days some of the advertisers made an effort to make their ads actually funny - so it was less annoying having to sit through them.

  6. tiggity Silver badge

    Cineworld

    Have a long history of treating staff badly (use search engine of choice to find lots of info about their industrial / staff disputes).

    Would not shed a tear for the company bigwigs (but obviously yet more sh*t for the coalface staff to deal with).

    .. Though the cynic in me half expects its a deliberate ploy to crash the company, and a new company with same gang in charge emerges phoenix like from the ashes and then uses lack of assets / funds to treat staff even worse.

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

      Re: Cineworld

      There's not much else that purpose-built cinemas can be used for. So somebody is going to come along and re-use those assets when this is all over, assuming people can be tempted back to watch on the big screen. And I think they can. Because that's one thing that "young people"* haven't abandoned, unlike old skool telly and newspapers.

      * With their long hair and their loud music, you can't even understand the words, and their weird clothes - not like in my day. Hanging's too good for 'em - they should all do a few years in the army, make men of them... Don't know they're born... In my day... ... ...Proper puddings with custard... ...mumble mumble mumble...

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "MarsServerProvider itself is a bit of software associated (in this instance) with NovaStar, based in Xi'an, China, who lurk behind an awful lot of the world's LED display controls."

    Well, that will be them getting banned soon, you know for reasons...

    1. Korev Silver badge
      Coat

      Maybe they'll shift the drinks to MarsBarProvider to keep some money...

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