back to article Makes sense, this does, says US appeals court as it swats away Oracle's protests in $10bn JEDI contract spat

The ongoing JEDI pantomime took another turn today [PDF] as Oracle's challenges to the handling of the winner-takes-all $10bn cloud contract were rejected by a US appeals court. Somewhat irrelevant to Microsoft, which was awarded the Joint Enterprise Defense Infrastructure (JEDI) contract in October, Big Red's protest was …

  1. b0llchit
    Coat

    Spoiled children

    Oracle: It is not fair!

    Court: What do you mean?

    Oracle: That the government does not give us money.

    Court: The government is not obliged to give you any money.

    Oracle: No Fair! It is given to others. We deserve it!

    Court: Ehm, what is your argument?

    Oracle: Larry needs another boat to sail the seas.

    Court: Why didn't you say so in the first place; here you go.

    Larry: I hate water.

    Oracle: Yes, but the money is too good selling vapor. You taught us, can't you remember?

    Larry: Sorry, my rocket got wet, you were saying?

    1. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge
      Joke

      Re: Spoiled children

      Mr President: I'm up for re-election in soon. Could do with some funds for the campaign

      Larry: Sorry Mr President, I missed that, I have this damned itch in my back that needs scratching

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Spoiled children

      Oracle: It is not fair!

      Court: What do you mean?

      Oracle: That the government does not give us money.

      Court: The government is not obliged to give you any money.

      Oracle: No Fair! It is given to others. We deserve it!

      Court: <takes ~2 years to decide case>

      Oracle: that was so worth it, the government paid an additional 2 years on our hosting contracts avoiding significant losses and alarming reports to the market.

      FTFY

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Devil

    Master Yoda says to young Padawan Larry Ellison

    "Screwed, you are I guess."

  3. Throatwarbler Mangrove Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    Confused

    Where's the Babylon 5 pic?

  4. DCFusor
    Trollface

    I feel safe not.

    If our national security is going to depend on "enterprise grade cloud" service, we need not worry about foreign attacks, it'll fall over on its own, examples abound. All an adversary need do is watch and wait...

  5. IGotOut Silver badge

    Expect a tweet

    from the Brat-in-chief saying the courts are wrong and he is going to write an executive order that only allows companies owned by people called Larry to bid.

  6. Whitter
    Thumb Down

    Missed the real boat

    "... at least three commercial cloud-hosting data centers within the US, separated by at least 150 miles, and met various requirements regarding FedRAMP..."

    It seems the lobbying to get the contract had already been won while the tender requirements were being defined.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Missed the real boat

      Not sure I'm following you.

      Physical redundancy and diversity are key to maintaining operations. You need more than one (two is minimal, three is better) datacenters.

      You need them to be located far enough apart so that regional issues (hurricanes, floods, riots) don't take out more than one.

      Why are these not reasonable requirements?

  7. hoola Silver badge

    Ah well.....

    Oracle have got what they deserved behaving like a spoilt brat "it's no fair".

    I don't particularly like Microsoft and the way they operate but the are angels compared to Amazon.

    The loses don't like it because the likelihood is that once the services and data are are in the MS cloud machine they will never come out. All the major cloud players know this now which is why these mega-deals are so acrimonious.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Ah well.....

      If they were serious about ensuring absolute safety of data and function they should have required diversity of provider... at least two cloud providers willing to work together to demonstrate ability to seamlessly transition data and function from location A to location B.

  8. Alan Brown Silver badge

    > Oracle have got what they deserved behaving like a spoilt brat "it's no fair".

    They learned from the US government's method of international negotiations

  9. Roger Kynaston Silver badge

    Headline should read:

    "That's not logical Jim..."

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