
Puntastic
Well that's just kilowatt-ever fun we might have had in the comments!
As if a few volts were enough to get between a steaming Cornishman and his pint, a pub near the UK pirate haven of Penzance has run an electric fence along the bar to enforce social distancing. And yes, it can be turned on. As you may well know, or maybe you don't, Britain's watering holes reopened earlier this month to …
Well, I suppose such a fence could be worked with. Now, about that fence on the loo...
Having had a glut of blackcurrants ( to keep on topic) this year I've knocked up several litres of Blackcurrant/Navy Rum and demerara - think Sloe Gin with added thunder and talking ravens! Should work out a lot cheaper when Cornwall starts smuggling full time next year!
I'll add a recipie to the thread for others to try, improve upon, or spitspray as they choose.
EverClear 191 or the nearest thing to "evaporates at room temp" alcohol you can find.
7-Up or Gingerale, something light, bubbly, & fizzy to waken the senses.
Kiwi-Strawberry fruit juice from Snapple or your favorite source.
A pinch of sugar to taste.
Crushed or shaved ice to make the results into a Slushie, Snowcone, or other similar treat.
Fill glasses with the ice & set aside in the freezer.
Mix everything else in a large *non metallic* container using a *non metallic* spoon.
Pour the mix into the glasses of ice for a tasty hot weather drink.
Just be sure to be either sitting in a very low chair or already laying on the ground when you start drinking.
It is called "Insidious" for a reason, namely that you don't realize you're sloshed until you're already under the table & giggling at the hallucinations.
The mix can also be poured into *non metallic* icecube trays & frozen into cubes for adding to other drinks, but this tends to make the other drinks *much* more lethal.
Mixing this with other alcohols is *NOT* recommended as it's already potent enough to flatten your ass like a sperm whale dropped from orbit.
I learned how to make it while in the Society for Creative Anachronism (kind of like the Renaissance Fair except infinitely less pole-up-the-ass-ish) and got quite a few pirate camps into trouble for the resulting public indecency.
Enjoy! =-D
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One of the funniest things I've seen was when on a farm and a visiting labourer tried to step over an electric fence. Something of a vertically-challenged chap, he discovered that the fence had been set at a height about an inch over his inside leg measurement. As he took a step over, he got a jolt through his gentleman's area and jumped in the air...then landed again with one leg each side of the fence, got another jolt...and so it continued until someone could stop laughing long enough to go and disconnect the power.
Seems to be an overall deficiency, since I find stick shift actually makes you look at the stuff in front of you more often, which seems to be an issue for some people.
The list of reasons to drive an automatic I've heard includes:
"What about stop and go traffic? I commute in traffic jams!"
"But hills!!! How do you start up a hill!!!"
"I don't want to have to replace a clutch every yea.r"
"I need both hands on the wheel, taking one off for anything (other than digging for the phone/whatever) is unsafe."
"You can't have start-stop auto braking cruise control in a manual, I only drive with cruise control."
(Paraphrased from the original, but someone actually did say they only ever used cruise buttons and brake, no accelerator, outside of driveway/parking lots.)
The unspoken but seen:
"I prefer to eat my chips and fish while doing my makeup and driving."
"Does this cellphone make my elbow steering look safe?"
"Sorry I didn't see you, I was adjusting the volume on my rolling home theater with flat screen TV on the dashboard."
There are medical reasons why a third pedal can be a bother, and those are legit reasons in my book.
"Because I prefer the smooth ride and lack of interaction." is another legit one.
But this whole "Automatic = safer!" joke is just that.
To be fair, I do have a soft spot for the A413 TorqueFlite and the C4.
Over here on the left pond I think you should get an insurance discount for manual
Only enthusiast drivers (and ex-pats) have it. So it filters out idiots driving their SUV's while drinking their starbucks, checking their phones and belting their kids.
It's impossible for the average local to steal.
The only proper automatic is a Glide ... and even then, they only belong in bracket cars. FMX in a pinch, for street/strip cars that run on an index (C6 if you have enough low-end torque to kill the FMX).
Disclaimer: Our big dually tow rig is an automatic, but only because that was the only transmission option with the torque/horsepower that we needed for our 6 horse slant.
> Responsible farmers keep the electric fences inside the physical fences
Not where I go walking they don't. Sometimes they don't have many of those little warning signs either. It pays to know what electric fencing looks like: look for the insulators holding the wire off the posts.
"look for the insulators holding the wire off the posts."
Or as they're known to some of us, "Forbidden marshmallows"
Long anecdote short, my father once recounted a tale of an electric fence being put up, a bag of marshmallows (each roughly the size of the insulators being put up.) as a snack for the kids doing the nailing and wiring, and some dim, but glowing, neighbor kids who thought that they could pull a "marshmallow" off the fence for a snack.
> Not where I go walking they don't. Sometimes they don't have many of those little warning signs either.
Aye, and not where the cows are illiterate, either. The point of an electric fence is to keep the cattle (works for horses, too) away from the "physical fence", which may be damaged by a casual half-ton bovine nudge, or in fact absent, e.g. if you're trying to keep a herd in one half of a grazing area. Protecting the electric fence from contact is totally pointless, unless you're actually trying to exclude humans. That's pointless, too, because everyone who has grown up in the country knows how to disable an electric fence for long enough to pass over or under it.
Used to use? Bang sticks are still common tools in places where they are warranted. I bought the inventory of an out of business dive-shop about ten years ago (mostly to get a complete collection of OMC, Mercury and Volvo special tools). Included in the purchase was a long, narrow locked box with a selection of around a dozen different powerheads in various calibers. I've tested all of them (they work), but have never seen a need to actually put one to use. They are legal in California for defensive purposes (Great Whites are fairly common around here (not that they are as vicious as Hollywood portrays them)), but they are not legal for taking/landing fish.
Indeed, they are treated humans like Sheep or Cattle!
Aerosols can stay suspended for hours and drift, which makes "social distancing" dehumanising farce, and enforcing it by cattle shock fencing is pointless sadism, which should be regarded as GBH.
This whole Corvid-19 event is shock doctrine, to socially re-engineer the world, justified by hysterical over reaction to a virus which turns out to be no more deadly than the flu; under 0.01% of the population dead, on average, in no way justifies the still growing significant social and economic damage. We should be dismantling all of this medical theatre BS, because it has already increasing costs for service businesses e.g. notice what dentists are doing now, and their significantly higher charges!
"enforcing it by cattle shock fencing is pointless sadism"
It's not pointless, it's bloody funny. It's called schadenfreude, and it goes like this:
Person: is a twat, doesn't care about respecting others
Person: Bzzzzzt!
Everybody else: Ha! Ha!
(icon, because I'm sick of fucktards that don't fucking understand to stay the fuck away; one metre, two metre, that doesn't mean stand close enough that you couldn't slide a newspaper between us, just fuck right off...)
Who can't differentiate between the bar and the urinal?
You're asking? Really? We all have seen some examples there. Then again, we have to be understanding of less experienced punters (That's just the way we are, aren't we?). Slip ups can always happen.
Who can't differentiate between the bar and the urinal?
Reminds me of an army exercise when I was in the OTC some decades ago.
One of our number nipped out and accidentally watered an electric cattle fence he hadn't noticed.
The problem for the rest of us was that we were not allowed to use plain English over the radio. We could tell the "other end" that someone was hurt. They were happy at describing it as a "burn" but were struggling to figure out how to say what had been burnt.
Perhaps it was a prediction of my future employment (in the NHS) but I suggested the 1st Aid shorthand of calling it their 1% and this was deemed OK.
He was back with us the next day, if a little red faced!
One of my mates lived in a terraced house right next to a pub, in Manchester back in the late 70s. Up until then he'd enjoyed the convenience of highly-adjacent beer and crisps, but his fiancee had just moved in with him and they were looking to cut back on expenses with the intent of starting a family, so the drinking had to be paused. Once he was no longer a regular in the pub and didn't meet any of the new intake of students into the area, some of them got into the habit of staggering out of the pub at closing time and relieving themselves in his porch. He caught one or two and gave them a bollocking, but that soon became tedious. He thought about it and came up with a simple answer: two sheets of chicken wire fixed to the porch and the lower third of the door, wired up to a car battery inside. Problem solved.
>wired up to a car battery inside
Yes, I guess that would work, if the earth path was not too resistive, yer piss-artist would get ten or eleven volts through the nether regions - not too pleasant. However, a cattle fence is a different kettle of worms - although typically battery powered, the voltage put on the wire is stepped up to around 8,000 volts, but the current is pulsed, and limited to around 100 mA. It gives you a nasty jolt, and then another a couple of seconds later if you're dim enough to have kept contact. The learning curve is not steep.
What I really had on the back of my mind was this Ren & Stimpy episode...
"Who can't differentiate between the bar and the urinal?"
A friend had a job to paint the loo in a bookies on Kilburn High Rd(*). He got fed up with people ignoring the sign on the door and barging in, so he locked the door and got on with the job.
He discovered from the manager that desperate punters had been simply standing close up to the carpet covered counter, careful to avoid splashing.
(* I don't remember which one. Every other shop on the High Rd is a turf accountant)
Cross pond translation can be very precarious. Just imagine the disappointment, caused by just one letter...
Cornish Rattler Apple Cider, Alcohol Units 3, ABV 6% vol
Ratler, the German equivalent of the British shandy, low alcohol, 2% ABV
Our village caffi (in Wales) re-opened yesterday - outside service only (as per Welsh Government rules). Entry to building to pay and to use the loos (via the back door).
Would you believe the number of visitors (on holiday from England) who couldn't understand why they couldn't sit inside (it was pissing down). Explained slowly in words of one syllable, but no, they couldn't grasp the concept that Wales is not in England, and has a different government and rules.
I like the idea of the electric fence and cattle prods. Or could we get a few 2nd hand Tasers on eBay?
I went to Twycross Zoo on Saturday. Full of people with Leicester accents (bear in mind that Leicester is supposed to still be a locked down Red zone) pushing and jostling and completely ignoring the social distancing rules. And then to get out you had to go through the inbound kiosk lines!
Perhaps I need to get a Victorian hooped skirt and add electric fence wire to the hoops!
Or just get a set of suspenders, a hulahoop, some clip leads, & a portable battery pack. Hook the hoop to the suspenders & wear like it were a pair of clown trousers. Run the clip leads from the battery, via the suspenders, to the hoop to act as your own personal cattle fence.
I'm using neon disco plaid suspenders & a fanny pack contained Mr. Fusion to keep folks away, but those may be overkill given that I'm completely nude except for the face mask.
=-)p
Umm, for some of that time Wales was part of England.
The fount of all wisdom, Wikipedia, claims that the Laws in Wales Acts were passed in 1535-45, integrating Wales into England. Hence MPs from there to the English Parliament in London. Any legal distinction between a Welsh person and an English one was also abolished at this time.
Welsh nationalism and political activity is largely a post-War phenomenon. Arguably the separation back into two countries was as late as 1998, when the Act setting up the Welsh Assembly was passed.
Those attempting to discuss this topic with Welsh people will find that they often have clear strongly-held views on the subject. Any mistakes I've made above may be assumed to be purely down to my own ignorance!
So before c.1550 Wales did have its own government and rules, but this situation did not come back until 1999. You would have hoped twenty years would be long enough for people to notice, but apparently not.
"Would you believe the number of visitors (on holiday from England) who couldn't understand why they couldn't sit inside (it was pissing down). Explained slowly in words of one syllable, but no, they couldn't grasp the concept that Wales is not in England, and has a different government and rules."
Just so you know, not all of us English are that stupid. Sadly, it seems a lot are.
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