back to article It's National Cream Tea Day and this time we end the age-old debate once and for all: How do you eat yours?

It's that time of year again when National Cream Tea Day asks the age-old question: cream then jam or jam then cream? Since we last posed it, momentous events have happened in the world; the UK is on its way out of the European Union, a former reality show host was elected as US President, Australia caught fire, and Brit Prime …

  1. Zimmer
    Coat

    It doesn't matter..

    'cos when it's scone, it's scone...

    ..it's the black hoodie, and you never saw me here..

    1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

      Re: It doesn't matter..

      But how do you pronounce "scone" - to rhyme with "shone" or "stone"?

      1. illiad

        Re: It doesn't matter..

        it depends what side of the border!!!

        1. RobbieM

          Re: It doesn't matter..

          Not really, as usual, us scots through a spanner in the works, generally we pronounce it like 'gone' but when it comes to the town of Scone, home of Scottish monarchs we pronounce it to rhyme it with 'soon'.

          1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

            Re: It doesn't matter..

            I also came here to add that suggestion. Also, jam, cream or cream, jam....really doesn't matter so long as the whole thing is dunked in batter and deep fried before serving with a chilled glass of Buckfast.

          2. getHandle

            Re: It doesn't matter..

            Given your throughing, no one really cares...

          3. Toni the terrible

            Re: It doesn't matter..

            The stone of scone will break your teeth even if you put on cream then jam or jam then cream

        2. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

          Re: It doesn't matter..

          "it depends what side of the border"

          And which border. In fact it varies considerably throughout England and probably elsewhere. Fortunately SWMBO and I both come from "shone" areas.

      2. Natalie Gritpants Jr

        Re: It doesn't matter..

        I don't understand. "shone" rhymes with "stone" doesn't it?

        1. A K Stiles Silver badge
          Coat

          Re: It doesn't matter..

          Did you miss an icon, or are you from an area with pronunciation unfamiliar to me?

          shone = Shh-on, stone = St-own

          also as mentioned above Scone = Sc-on, unless it's a place of venerated granite and then it's Sc-ooon, as in "Oooo, that's a nice bit of granite you've got there!"

          As far as cream teas go, butter, then jam then cream, on a Cornish split. Battered and deep-fried optional, and only if you make it into a sandwich, otherwise the jam and cream try to escape in the heat!

          1. Toni the terrible

            Re: It doesn't matter..

            I just ask for a cream tea, what goes on first - butter! To an eater the order of jam and cream is irrelevant.

        2. mad_dr

          Re: It doesn't matter..

          I was waiting for someone to post this...

          As a Brit living in Canada, I nearly fell off my seat when I realised that our neighbours to the south pronounce "Shone" to rhyme with throne, rather than to rhyme with gone!

          So the real question is as to whether Scone rhymes with throne or with gone.

          And the real answer is, obviously, [redacted].

          1. A K Stiles Silver badge

            Re: It doesn't matter..

            Really? That is a new one on me too. I wonder where that pronunciation (shone/throne) originates from, or if it's "homegrown' Canadian out of the mix of accents from settlement / invasion.

        3. Whiskers

          Re: It doesn't matter..

          Glad to see I'm not the only fan of the split :))

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The one true way...

    ...is a 2Litre bottle of caffeinated soda, a bag of PixieStix, and the taught tummy of a nubile hooker off which to snort them.

    But what do I know? I'm just an insane Yank with a t-shirt that reads "I am free of the tyranny of pants!"

    1. OssianScotland Silver badge
      Paris Hilton

      Re: The one true way...

      What was she (or even her tummy) taught?

      (Enquiring minds REALLY want to know.... in detail!)

      Paris, obviously

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: What was she (or even her tummy) taught?

        Presumably, the correct way to apply jam and cream to scones. And I am somewhat disappointed, I must say, that I am none the wiser as to the aforesaid nubile hooker's preferences in this matter.

        1. The Dogs Meevonks

          Re: What was she (or even her tummy) taught?

          As a hooker, I'm assuming she's not a fan of having her cream in 'pie' form due to the extra risks involved.

        2. Cynic_999 Silver badge

          Re: What was she (or even her tummy) taught?

          What's a rugby team's front-row forward got to do with anything?

      2. Jellied Eel Silver badge

        Re: The one true way...

        What was she (or even her tummy) taught?

        This got me thinking of belly dancers for only the 732nd time today.. and whether the motion could be utilised to propel sweet morsels towards a waiting mouth, nestled in a handy chin rest.

        (But jam first. And if scone has the consistency of stone, then it rhymes with it and may be shot from a catapult. Also indicates the use of the wrong flour or not enough raising agent.)

      3. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge

        Re: The one true way...

        I tawt I taw a puddy...

    2. MJI Silver badge

      Re: The one true way...

      If hookers are nubile, how do you describe a prop or fly half?

      Brian Moore nubile WTF!

      1. TrumpSlurp the Troll Silver badge
        Trollface

        Re: The one true way...Nubile?

        For my sins I once looked the word up.

        It means "marriageable".

        So technically gender neutral.

        However it seems to have morphed into the assumption that only young and statuesque females are worth marrying. On which I couldn't possibly comment.

        1. Cynic_999 Silver badge

          Re: The one true way...Nubile?

          "

          It means "marriageable".

          "

          So a synonym for "very wealthy"?

        2. Toni the terrible

          Re: The one true way...Nubile?

          true though

      2. Clunking Fist Bronze badge

        Re: The one true way...

        Aye, that Codie Taylor is pretty fit.

    3. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

      Re: The one true way...

      I'm just an insane Yank with a t-shirt that reads "I am free of the tyranny of pants!"

      It's what yous guys call "biscuits". Although considering biscuit comes from the French for "twice baked" it makes we wonder how hard your "biscuits" might be.

    4. John Jennings Bronze badge

      Re: The one true way...

      If you have to pay for it, you are either not doing it right - or sharing :)

  3. Coastal cutie
    Linux

    Too much arguing = not enough eating

    Personally I take the Somerset view - arguing about it is a waste of good eating time.

    1. b0llchit
      Boffin

      Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

      Due to the rotational symmetry of the scone, the whole discussion of ordering is pointless, unless ordering means to get it delivered asap for immediate consumption. So, yes, stop arguing for one side and get my order delivered so I can eat.

      1. Sir Runcible Spoon Silver badge
        WTF?

        Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

        omg, you mean you eat your like a sandwich!? You filthy, filthy beast.

        1. b0llchit
          Meh

          Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

          Only purists have the burden of frustration. I just enjoy the result, regardless.

          1. Psmo Silver badge
            Boffin

            Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

            Eating regardless is the surest way to get cream in your eyebrows.

            Goggles on.

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

              To quote the American fast food chain Carl's Jrs, "If it doesn't get all over the place it doesn't belong in your face."

              I can accept the goggles though since there's few things more annoying than getting an eye poked out by a freshly waxed patch o' thatch.

    2. Frogmaster

      Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

      Next we'll be debating the Devon vs Somerset Cider Wars as fought out by yokels over centuries. I'll nail my colours to the mast as Devonian, having married a Somerset lass, and this is still the subject of much debate at home (over a glass or three, of course)....

      1. hmv Silver badge

        Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

        How do you feel about Sandleford's cider with ginger? After a 20L box, I'm still not sure - I'll just have to get another to see how it works out.

        1. Richard 12 Silver badge
          Pint

          Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

          Sounds like an experiment that needs repeating.

          Science!

      2. The Dogs Meevonks

        Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

        I prefer mine from Suffolk...Aspalls is yummy.

        1. Boris the Cockroach Silver badge

          Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

          Noting could beat addlestones cider fresh from the pump

          Or addlebrains as we engineers called it... ahhh the stories... the bodges.... the outright disasters all caused by an innocent fermented liquid served to a bunch of government employed hammer wielders

          "err professor... your device appears to be sinking"

          "Its supposed to"

          "But we havent opened the valve to flood it yet"

          oggle goggle oggle goggle

          "Best we ajourn back to the pub for more cider before anyone notices ..."

          1. Quando

            Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

            Try Chucklehead. Dry of course.

          2. Toni the terrible

            Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

            Who reaclls the oogle-oogle box?

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

        Yes, just get on with it - but cream first (piled on high), followed by a dollop of strawberry jam. Wash down with Somerset cider (and not the bottled variety).

        Yours,

        Somerset born,

        Somerset bred,

        Strong in the arm,

        Thick in the 'ed!

      4. Toni the terrible

        Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

        Then there is Kent Cider, Sussex Cider, South Gloucester Cider - and dont start on the Perrys!

    3. Nick Ryan Silver badge

      Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

      Having been "honorary Cornish" for some time (escaped now), I took to putting jam on one half of the scone, cream on the other half, slapping them together and eating like that. This way I can innocently and simultaneously annoy both the Cornish and the Devonish. And eat some lovely cream scones...

      1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

        Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

        But, that’s a dangerously high scone to cream ratio!

        The reason for everything you do, when eating a cream tea, is to maximise the amount of cream you can consume without engendering excessive unfavourable comment from those around you. Thus the jam debate is easily dismissed. A smooth layer of jam on the scone helps the massive dollop of cream on top to stick. Whereas if you do it the other way round, you struggle to get a good even layer of jam and the construction has become too rickety for spreading.

        1. Toni the terrible

          Re: Too much arguing = not enough eating

          Open the Scone, add jam then cream on one half and cream then jam on the other. Do not put the scone together - eat al la open sandwhich seperately - job done

  4. Hubert Cumberdale

    There is a third option:

    Leave the jam out of it. Personally, I consider jam to be a savoury thing that has no place in anything remotely cake-like.*

    No, wait – hear me out. Think about it – jam goes in sandwiches, which aren't generally considered a dessert. I like to have apricot jam with bacon and/or sausages. The Americans (bless them) seem to like it with peanut butter. Just because it has sugar in it, that doesn't mean it can be used in a dessert-like context. I believe the acidity of it spoils the taste of a perfectly good sponge cake, messes with the sensations derived from cream (in whatever order), and generally just gets in the way of whatever sweet thing it is that I really want to eat.

    In summary: scone first, then cream, then other half of scone.

    *Including doughnuts. I'm not with Bob Marley on this one.

    1. MJI Silver badge

      Re: There is a third option:

      Jam with sausages - YUK!

      I want mine between a scone and clotted cream.

      1. Hubert Cumberdale

        Re: There is a third option:

        No, it's definitely cream first, then sausage.

        1. Clunking Fist Bronze badge

          Re: There is a third option:

          Crikey, which came first: the cream or the sausage? Pffft.

    2. hmv Silver badge

      Re: There is a third option:

      Being perverse, I do wonder how well a black pudding in a scone would go down.

      Of course as a vegetarian, I can't try this for myself, but inquiring minds must know.

      1. Mr Humbug

        Have you not heard of the V-Pud?

        http://www.reallancashireblackpuddings.co.uk/vegan-black-pudding/

        In olden days these were available direct from the maker at various Farmers' Markets

        1. Hubert Cumberdale

          Vegan black pudding makes no sense... like vegan haggis (which I have tried, alongside real haggis... it wasn't bad, it just wasn't good either) – you're better off just eating something else.

          1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

            I've never quite understood the reasons for making vegetarian (or for the tiny minority, vegan) equivalents of meat products. Why would someone choosing not to eat meat still want the taste of meat? Especially those with an axe to grind over "murdering" animals. (We'll leave the argument over whether "meat replacements" actually taste like meat for another day)

            1. Hubert Cumberdale

              To be fair, it's quite possible to like the taste of meat and simultaneously dislike the fact you have to kill animals to get it.

          2. Piro

            Well, there is white pudding, which is traditional, but traditionally made with pork fat. You could make it with vegetable fat.. You'd basically have a fatty oatmeal patty, to then fry up..

          3. Schultz Silver badge
            Happy

            ... it wasn't bad, it just wasn't good either

            I love the Korean way to distinguish tasty (맛이다) from not tasty (맛업다). Whether you like it is a completely different question that is rarely raised.

      2. gerdesj Silver badge
        Windows

        Re: There is a third option:

        *Sigh* Post pub neck filler test engaged.

        Oh bollocks, no pubs.

    3. Dr_N Silver badge

      Re: There is a third option:

      Hubert Cumberdale> I like to have apricot jam with bacon and/or sausages

      That is just savagery.

    4. Hubert Cumberdale

      Re: There is a third option:

      Well, I didn't really expect people to agree. Still stand by it, though. Sometimes it's fun to get 100% downvotes...

      1. Nick Ryan Silver badge

        Re: There is a third option:

        Next heathens will try to suggest that pineapple has no place on a pizza. It does - liberally sprinkled on top... :)

        1. Clunking Fist Bronze badge

          Re: There is a third option:

          And let's not get started on those mentals who won't put beetroot in a burger. Or egg. Next, folk will suggest that canned spaghetti has no place on a pizza. Lads, if you can put ice cream on a pizza, you can put spaghetti on a pizza.

    5. Tom 38 Silver badge

      Re: There is a third option:

      There's one kind of jam that goes great with meats, and that is caramelised onion jam.

    6. John Brown (no body) Silver badge
      WTF?

      Re: There is a third option:

      "I like to have apricot jam with bacon and/or sausages."

      WTF? See icon for further exclamation of disbelief ------------->

    7. logicalextreme Bronze badge

      Re: There is a third option:

      I'm a jam, no-cream individual. I often find cream kinda boring and I'm generally not into dairy if it isn't just horrific quantities of cheese.

    8. KBeee

      Re: There is a third option:

      Barbarian! Every right thinking civilised person knows it's marmalade with sausages.

    9. Dolvaran

      Re: There is a third option:

      British Army field kitchens have a wonderful desert - deep fried battered jam sandwiches with custard. Now there's food for the Gods. The only savoury jam is made from onions.

      1. Death Boffin
        Angel

        Re: There is a third option:

        Sounds like a short step away from the Monte Christo sandwich. Ham and cheese, battered, deep fried, and served with raspberry jam. Truly heaven.

    10. Cynic_999 Silver badge

      Re: There is a third option:

      Then you have never tried a jam sandwich soaked in hot milk as a dessert.

      Seriously.

  5. Mungo Spanner

    Obviously you spread the jam on first - it's easier to spread a thick layer of cream on jam than a thin layer of jam on cream.

    And just dumping it all in a pile in the middle doesn't count!

    1. gotes

      I'm from Devon but I think the Cornish have got it right. As you say, it's easier to put more cream on top of the jam than trying to spread jam on cream.

      I still put cream on first though.

      1. gerdesj Silver badge
        Megaphone

        You spread the CC like butter with a knife and dollop jam on top with a spoon like a Devonian.

        I'm half Devonian but I lived in Plymouth for several years (PP, PSW, UP and townie) which meant that I sometime got ambivalent thoughts about the subject. After enough self flagellation with a huge pasty (top crimp of course), I soon recovered.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Based on my own exhaustive investigations over many years, the correct temperature to enjoy a scone is 'straight from the oven'. However the heat is liable to melt the cream and it's not called "melted cream", right? Thankfully the jam has a high thermal coefficient thanks to it's sugar content and so spreading that on first helps delay the situation where cream is too runny to stay on the scone. I rest my case m'lud.

    3. Bowlers

      Northern option

      Butter first then cream then jam, if you're going for the clotted arteries do it proper like.

      1. gotes

        Re: Northern option

        Surely the Northern option is discard the scone and replace it with a meat pie?

        1. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge

          Re: Northern option

          Surely the Northern option is discard the scone and replace it with a meat pie?

          And then deep-fry it?

          1. Toni the terrible

            Re: Northern option

            No that's Scots to deep fry

        2. Intractable Potsherd Silver badge

          Re: Northern option

          Personally, I don't like cream and jam on meat pie in either order, but each to their own :-)

  6. sawatts
    Facepalm

    Obvious really...

    Jam on one side.

    Cream on the other.

    Slap them together.

    1. logicalextreme Bronze badge

      Re: Obvious really...

      And chuck it in the blender. Then have an argument with the nearest person about how to pronounce "smoothie".

      1. Intractable Potsherd Silver badge

        Re: Obvious really...

        How many ways *are* there to pronounce "smoothie"?

        [Did I miss a "whhoooshh"?]

  7. Ken Rennoldson

    Both are wrong. All good fresh scone needs is butter. If it's not a good fresh scone, feel free to put lipstick on the pig!

    1. Neil 32
      Coat

      I'm very much on your side here. Of course, it has to be proper butter. None of this lo-fat spread stuff!

      And the pronunciation has to be with a short 'o' otherwise it's no longer the fastest cake in the world (in the same vein... What's the fastest drink in the world? Milk, because it's pasteurised before you can see it!) Coat, the one with crumbs in the pockets.

    2. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

      Nearly right. Apply butter - so far so good. The jam and then cream. Why is this option not in the survery?

      1. A K Stiles Silver badge
        Pint

        Really had me wondering what "apple butter" was... Failure to parse sentence, apply more beer!

    3. steelpillow Silver badge
      Angel

      Unsalted butter of course. Applied before the scone is properly cooled.

      Then the jam (if you can wait that long)

      Then the cream

      Washed down with Worcestershire-brewed pear cider (aka perry) from Clive's Fruit Farm, although his Wobblejuice cider when on draught is an acceptable alternative; none of that West Country playboy stuff.

      1. Intractable Potsherd Silver badge

        For me, there is only one type of butter - salted. There have been a number of arguments in this house about the apparent need for yellow bland to cook with.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    How do I eat mine?

    Well, I open me gob and smash it in there. Within 2 seconds of chomping it doesn't really matter *how* it was made!

  9. Aladdin Sane Silver badge
    Gimp

    Nothing tops clotted cream.

    Icon just because.

    1. Snowy
      Coat

      What about clotted cream icecream?

  10. katrinab Silver badge
    Meh

    Usually a thick layer of unsalted french butter, then jam, which of course doesn't comply with any approved recipe.

    If I do have cream to hand, and usually I don't, then it goes on top of the jam.

    1. MJI Silver badge

      Even supermarkets do

      Cornish Clotted Cream now.

      1. katrinab Silver badge

        Re: Even supermarkets do

        They do indeed. But I usually don't have it in my fridge.

    2. Charlie Clark Silver badge

      Usually a thick layer of unsalted french butter

      Which is basically cream, solidified.

      1. Richard 12 Silver badge

        So cream, jam, cream?

        I could get behind that

      2. Zimmer
        Happy

        Not' solidified', heated , then cooled slowly

        Scalded indirectly by steam or by a water bath so the clots form at the top (a bit like a Turkish Bath near the House of Commons...?)

        I remember, as a child we used to get clotted cream sent via post from my uncle when he visited the couple in Devon that looked after him as an evacuee during the war... what a treat.

        And, as someone has already mentioned, it's now a weekly treat thanks to it being available in the supermarkets.

        1. Charlie Clark Silver badge
          Megaphone

          Re: Not' solidified', heated , then cooled slowly

          We got it once a year from my granma in Plymouth, back when it took 8 hours to drive there… A few years ago I found my local American-British store was stocking it here in Germany. And why not? It's damn fine stuff!

          Oi! El Reg, where's the scone with jam and cream icon?

    3. Tom 38 Silver badge

      If you don't have cream why bother making scones?

      1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

        Cheese scones are yummy, for a nice change. But obviously cream with fruit ones is best.

        1. Intractable Potsherd Silver badge

          Now we're talking! Cheese scones are marvellous, and don't have any disputes about the order of toppings. Fruit scones are fine with no toppings - nyam!

  11. MJI Silver badge

    Hmmm

    Scone - plain no dead flies.

    Then Jam - strawberry of course

    Then Cream - on top MUST be Cornish Clotted Cream.

    Cider, any west country should be nice, I tend to get mine from Herefordshire and Cornish producers.

    1. hmv Silver badge

      Re: Hmmm

      If you're going to add cider to the mix, I'd keep away from cream. Dipping the scone with cream is going to get messy with cream in the cider; and that just won't do.

    2. Chris G Silver badge

      Re: Hmmm

      I definitely prefer a scone with sultanas and even a little dried peel, the cream can go in there any time it likes. I'm in Spain so decent Asturian or Galician cider is OK, unfortunately no clotted cream here in the shops but a friend was a farmer in the UK many years ago and she makes us clotted cream ( not that easy) that looks and tastes as good as I remember.

      1. Tom 38 Silver badge

        Re: Hmmm

        Clotted cream isn't actually that difficult to make it just takes time - cook double/heavy cream for 12 hours at 70C for 12 hours, let it cool to room temperature, chill for 8+ hours in the fridge, and then separate the thick clotted cream on the top from the thin liquid (whey?) left behind. Whip it all together to blend in the crust, add some of that liquid if its too thick, homemade clotted cream.

        Only problem is that's 3 days until you can have your scones, buying a tub of Rodda's is far easier :)

        1. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge

          Re: Hmmm

          then separate the thick clotted cream on the top from the thin liquid (whey?) left behind.

          It's buttermilk, just use it to make the scones.

          Only problem is that's 3 days until you can have your scones, buying a tub of Rodda's is far easier :)

          But for those of us who live in uncultured parts of the world where clotted cream isn't available in the shops, making your own is the only option. Doesn't take 3 days, though. The initial cook works very well if done in the oven overnight.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Hmmm

      Herefordshire isn't the West Country. It's more like the Midlands. Or at a push Wales.

    4. Mike Richards

      Re: Hmmm

      Having grown up in Cornwall, may I suggest blackberry jam (or jelly if you don't like pips) as an alternative to strawberry? All the better if you picked the blackberries yourself in the last few days of the summer holidays before going back to school.

      Another Cornish alternative - thunder and lightning. In this case the cream goes on the scone and then you drizzle it with either treacle or golden syrup.

      1. Jonathan Richards 1

        Re: Hmmm

        Blackberry jam. Esz, proper job. Erright er ee, boy?

      2. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

        Re: Hmmm

        Ah... nostalgia. We used to have a huge garden on a massive hill with loads of fruit trees and 50ft of blackberry hedge. So Mum made jam (and pies) all the time. I really miss homemade blackberry jam! Blackberry and Apple jam is also bloody gorgeous.

        Nowadays I put raspberry jam on my scones.

    5. MJI Silver badge

      Re: Hmmm

      I mentioned cider because others do

      Obviously with scones you should be on tea

  12. Giles C Bronze badge

    Need clotted cream

    Thanks to you lot I am going to have to go and buy some clotted cream now.

    You have made me realise I need some proper stuff with a nice crust on the top, and I have some raspberrys I picked this afternoon..... along with a few strawberries.

    Right off to the shops

  13. drand

    No ta

    I must say ever since I stopped for a cream tea (Cornish implementation) on a bike ride in the Forest of Dean and was violently sick afterwards after giving it some welly up the hills, I haven't been able to eat one since. This was about ten years ago. So I'll just have the chocolate cake please.

    * I know this wasn't the fault of the scone-rhymes-with-stone, but still.

    1. gotes

      Re: No ta

      I have a similar problem with bananas. I still force myself to eat them occasionally, though.

  14. Maximum Delfango
    Paris Hilton

    Paris...

    ...because she's well known for eating the cream first.

    She tends to suck it straight out of the tube. So I'm told...

  15. The Dogs Meevonks

    At the risk of alienating 50% of you

    This how I do mine

    Cut a scone in half, on one half I put clotted cream and then jam, and on the other half I put jam and then clotted cream... Why you may ask... because I'm not a fan of putting the top half back on the scone... it just squirts out the sides when you bite into it. My way you get to honour both methods whilst getting twice as much jam and clotted cream.

    I'm a frickin genius. :)

    1. gotes

      Re: At the risk of alienating 50% of you

      I do this. I don't think I've ever made it into a sandwich, except maybe as a child.

  16. The Basis of everything is...

    Depends on how good you've been

    If I've been good then I get jam with a thick dollop of clotted cream in the middle.

    If I've let things slide a bit (and after 3 months of lockdown who hasn't) I get a thin scraping of cream with a smidge of jam on top.

    As for scones, Mary Berry has a foolproof recipe and method that my wife swears by. Same for her yorkshire puds.

  17. Jimmy2Cows Silver badge

    ...delightful cakey accompaniment is pronounced "scone"...

    Well I'm glad that's cleared that one up. I feel much better now the pronunciation schism which has blighted this fair land for many a year, has been well and truly put to rest once and for all.

    1. Chris G Silver badge

      Re: ...delightful cakey accompaniment is pronounced "scone"...

      If it wasn't supposed to have the O pronounced like Oh, it wouldn't have an E on the end!

      1. Alister Silver badge

        Re: ...delightful cakey accompaniment is pronounced "scone"...

        So you pronounce gone as gown then.do you?

        1. Terry 6 Silver badge

          Re: ...delightful cakey accompaniment is pronounced "scone"...

          That's a third way then. Though not actually one I've ever heard.

          "Scone" pronounced to rhyme with gone I have heard, often.

          "Scone" to rhyme with tone, a bit less so. Down my way it was people trying to sound posher than what they were said it like that.

          But to rhyme with gown - nope, never. Unless you mean "own" which does rhyme with tone/bone/phone etc.

          1. Alister Silver badge

            Re: ...delightful cakey accompaniment is pronounced "scone"...

            Yes I meant g own, as in OH. not OW

      2. Terry 6 Silver badge

        Re: ...delightful cakey accompaniment is pronounced "scone"...

        Yeah, absolutely, same as with done or gone (or honey or money) or one....err, Oh. .

      3. Captain Hogwash

        Re: ...delightful cakey accompaniment is pronounced "scone"...

        I'm glad you've shone some light on that for us. The argument might have gone on for ages otherwise.

        1. Dave 15 Silver badge

          Re: ...delightful cakey accompaniment is pronounced "scone"...

          The majority of times the e appears on te end of the word it alters the sound of the preceeding vowel so it matches its name (eh, ee, eye, ow, you)

          so if it was meant to be scon thats how it would be spelt, its got an e on the end for a reason :)

          1. A K Stiles Silver badge
            Joke

            Re: ...delightful cakey accompaniment is pronounced "scone"...

            Well now you've gone and done it!

  18. Martin 63

    You say tomato...

    Have I mispronounced "done" all my life?

    1. The Basis of everything is...
      Coffee/keyboard

      Re: You say tomato...

      Yes.

      For a techie, a system is never done.

      That word doesn't exist. Which means I never said that. oh....

    2. ClockworkOwl
      Boffin

      Re: You say tomato...

      I doubt it, however I'm also having doubts about your pronunciation of cone...

      'Here we show object "cone T"' >

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    As an outsider

    I had never heard to Clotted Cream, and never put anything in or on my scones.

    Looking forward to trying this some day.

    1. Piro

      Re: As an outsider

      Clotted cream is genuinely delicious, if you ask me

    2. Dave 15 Silver badge

      Re: As an outsider

      Look online, there are ways to make it. Amazon will also deliver it in 1kg pots (and smaller if you only have half a scone).

      What is amazing to me is how few countries actually have cream. The Germans translate 'sahne' to cream, if you check the actual product it is 'whipping cream' in its unwhipped state. They dont have single cream, double cream, extra thick double cream or clotted cream. I was able to demo to a German that with clotted cream you can stand your knife in it, then you can turn the pot upside down and the knife stays in the cream that stays in the pot!

  20. 2+2=5 Silver badge
    Coat

    National Cream Tea Days

    > It's that time of year again when National Cream Tea Day asks the age-old question: cream then jam or jam then cream?

    Neither, I take my tea with milk and sugar, certainly not with cream and jam.

    1. Chris G Silver badge

      Re: National Cream Tea Days

      Tea and jam is a thing in Russia, they mostly drink tea black, with moloko( milk) is far less common, often when you are a guest a small dish of jam and a teaspoon will come with the tea the usual way is a sip of tea and a small taste of jam on the spoon.

  21. Blackjack Silver badge

    Mmm, yeah both are fine

    I prefer to have both flavors in my mouth at the same time.

  22. Eclectic Man
    Boffin

    Sorry to be technical

    but surely it depends on the relative viscosities of the jam and the clotted cream? Whichever is more viscous should be spread on first.

    I usually have mine wit a pot of Earl Grey tea (brewed, not stewed) black, no sugar. So I will have to try out the suggestion of cider as an accompanying beverage.

    (Technical icon as 'viscosities' is quite a big word for a Saturday.)

    As for the correct way to pronounce "scone", if I ever meet the Queen, I'll ask her.

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

      Re: Sorry to be technical

      I don’t get the cider thing. Cream tea needs tea. Preferably Darjeeling, but breakfast is fine, or Earl Grey. Champagne is OK though, so I suppose a dry cider would be good. Aspalls do some nice dry ones.

    2. Dave 15 Silver badge

      Re: Sorry to be technical

      Never drink scrumpy with a cream tea, always have the cream tea mid afternoon or mid morning, and the scrupmy at breakfast, lunch and all night (well as long as you last before collapsing on the floor)

    3. Whiskers

      Re: Sorry to be technical

      Ideally, the viscsity of the cream and the jam should be very similar, both requiring the use of two spoons, or a knife and spoon, to transfer them to the split (or the scone if that's what you've got).

  23. heyrick Silver badge
    Happy

    I solved this when I was eight

    Cut scone in half. Jam on one half, cream on the other. Order of coverings is whichever is closest goes on first. Slam the two halves together, and eat while starting a conflict [*] amongst the other patrons as to whether it's said like "sk-own" or like "sk-un".

    * You know it's getting bad when people start putting their tea cups down with sufficient force to make the waitresses visibily wince, and start raising voices. Who'd have imagined such drama in a tea room?

    1. DasWezel
      Happy

      Re: I solved this when I was eight

      > "Order of coverings is whichever is closest goes on first."

      Precisely, couldn't agree more.

      Provided the jam is closest to hand, of course.

    2. Terry 6 Silver badge

      Re: I solved this when I was eight

      "sk-own" or like "sk-un"

      Neither of these

      No one has ever used those pronunciations. -own is a rhyme with "clown" or "down" except in the standalone word "own". English is like that.

      It's pronounced "skon" or "Skohn" ( sk /əʊn/)

      But "sk/un". Not even in Yorkshire, where that pronunciation form is common ( e.g. the number "wun" ).

      It's equally valid to say "sk/ohn" or sk/on" and you are fully entitled to use which ever you prefer.*

      *But the second one is right..

      1. heyrick Silver badge

        Re: I solved this when I was eight

        "No one has ever used those pronunciations."

        What you've demonstrated is that writing stuff out phonetically in a way that normal people can read (because not everybody is familiar with IPA) is...actually quite difficult.

        I've heard "s-cone" (rhymes with blown). I've also heard "skun" (rhymes with stun). And as you mention it, there's also "skon" (rhymes with gone). Origins? Perhaps regional. Tea rooms in the Cotswolds, and also around Bodmin/Padstow.

        1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

          Re: I solved this when I was eight

          I've also heard "skun" (rhymes with stun).

          That's a new one on me. I's the great thing about el Reg. There's always something new to learn.

          1. Eclectic Man
            Coat

            Re: I solved this when I was eight

            On the basis that "one" is pronounced 'wun', should "scone" be pronounced 'skwun'?

            (Mine is the one with jam stains down the front.)

      2. heyrick Silver badge
        FAIL

        Re: I solved this when I was eight

        "-own is a rhyme with "clown" or "down" except in the standalone word "own". English is like that.

        Sown. Blown. Known. Thrown. Overgrown. Shown. Mown.....

        English is like that.

        1. Terry 6 Silver badge

          Re: I solved this when I was eight

          Fair enough. I forgot those. I'm getting rusty. I'd argue that "down" etc. might be the more representative though. (tbh I have no evidence, just my own experience). Either way it's probably not the best way to define the sound. I assumed, incorrectly that you were defining the pronunciation with that sound "sc/ou/n)

          English is like that.

          It's one of the reasons why the government's emphasis on phonics teaching is so misdirected, even if you don't know much about human learning and how we actually read this demonstrates it.

        2. EH

          Re: I solved this when I was eight

          ...Town or Gown? A man of some renown, he frowned.

      3. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

        Re: I solved this when I was eight

        Not even in Yorkshire, where that pronunciation form is common ( e.g. the number "wun" )

        Not in this part of Yorkshire.

    3. Dave 15 Silver badge

      Re: I solved this when I was eight

      What???? NO NO NO NO NO.. your solution has entirely the wrong scone to cream ratio.

      Your answer does NOT provide nearly enough cream. One other thing, if you have both halves of the scone just how are you supposed to get cream on your nose?

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    A couple of years ago the joint Cornwall / Devon music festival was cancelled because they couldn't decide who should be on stage first - Cream or The Jam!

    A/C because I'm too ashamed to admit to posting this.

  25. JohnG Silver badge

    My family origins are in both Devon and Cornwall. When I was young, it was customary to serve clotted cream cool but not at fridge temperature. In this state, clotted cream is somewhat runny and jam should be spread before cream. Nowadays, people tend to serve clotted cream straight from the fridge and it will have the consistency of butter => cream first, then jam.

    As for the Cornish, there were no signs of clotted cream in Cornwall in the 1960s and 1970s, until they noticed that several places in Devon were making good money selling cream teas. Twenty years later, the Cornish were claiming they invented cream teas.

    1. Dolvaran

      It used to be known as Cornish Cream before the War.

  26. Clunking Fist Bronze badge

    Dates?

    Or no dates?

  27. Dave 15 Silver badge

    A good way out

    I love both Devon and Cornwall, its difficult to choose which way is best to eat the cream so why not split the scone in half and do one half cream on top and the other half cream first? You dont really lose out unless you are skimpy with the cream....

    Which leads to another thought... cream first, jam and then cream last ... now that IS an answer!

    1. Intractable Potsherd Silver badge

      Re: A good way out

      We have the winner!!

  28. Jolyon Ralph

    Jam on both sides and then cream in the middle.

  29. Whiskers

    Splits

    Growing up in Cornwall in the '50s, I came to prefer splits to scones. For a start, they hold more cream (and jam). Strawberry jam is OK, best if home-made from wild fruit, but blackberry jam or bramble jelly are best with clotted cream.

    We used to have to fight the flies and wasps for the jam; whatever happened to all of them?

  30. Stephen Wilkinson

    There's the Cornish way and there's the right way (which of course is the Devon way).

  31. Noel Morgan

    cone is pronounced like tone

    adding an S

    Scone should be pronounced like Stone.

    although - i still call it a scone......

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