back to article A fête worse than death: After struggling to connect into SAP's SapphireNow online shindig, we were all 'rewarded' with a Sting concert

SAP CEO Christian Klein's epithet may well be that he appears competent – as in, he's the sort of person whose advice on the best option for life insurance one would be accepted without hesitation. The opening of SapphireNow – the enterprise application monster's annual shindig held this year on the internet rather than …

  1. Nate Amsden

    from an ignorant person

    4 months to bring something up seems like a while, assuming that is good how long might that process usually take?

    1. RM Myers
      Unhappy

      Re: from an ignorant person

      It feels like something slightly less than the time until the heat death of the universe, if you are lucky enough to get it to actually work. Although to be fair, the soul crushing effort to get these large ERP projects finished may be distorting the sense of time.

    2. KSM-AZ
      Gimp

      SAP Deployment.

      First you get to install a coupla 10 servers. Then you get to hire a coupla 50 or so SAP consultants and programming types that know the lingo. They (the consultants) all drive cars nobody here can afford. Then you get to design and write all your software around the accounting framework. So the answer is, as long as it takes to wirte an ap system, an ar system, a gl system, and whatever else you might need to run your business.

      Then you take a few weeks to pat yourself on the back about how easy it was, and over the course of the next few years you hire consultants to fix your PO system so that you can see a list of the PO's you created, and other fun things like "converting" an expense PO to a Capital PO without deleting the 50 or so lines and re-entering them on a different input form. Oh and writing an asset export/import routine so you can do inventory on sharepoint and spreadsheets because nobody wants to write anything where someone can actually look at the stuff they are resposible for in real time.

      Oh, also the consultants will make sure all your various accounting codes are as long as possible so looking at a number your will imediately know what it is like 7100100001 will mean 7xxx1pppnn = a cost center expense code 7 = this is a cost center code xxx = xxx is the cost center 1 means the plant (location) and ppp is the plant number (normally the same as xxx and nn = item type, not to be confused with the general ledger category, which is another really fucking long number, but it's not a big deal because even though it's a lot of typing I can hand type all of it every time with muscle memory generally flawlessly.

      Woth every penny of the million bucks a year, make sure it's as complex as possible. SAP cloud servers are a piece of work as well.

      YMMV,

      1. matthewdjb

        Re: SAP Deployment.

        Been paying my bills for over twenty years. What's not to like?

      2. ecofeco Silver badge

        Re: SAP Deployment.

        Nailed it.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I like this kind of reporting.

  3. Chris G

    A Sting concert?

    Stings can be painful or cause allergic reactions.

  4. Graham Lee
    Coat

    Don't stand so close to me (within 2m)

    To be fair, he did write the song of the moment.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Don't stand so close to me (within 2m)

      It's been a while since I saw what I would call the comment of the week, but I think this one is hard to beat :)

  5. ecofeco Silver badge

    Hot spirits

    In the material world.

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