back to article Someone get Greenpeace on the line. Boffins clock carbon 'pollution' cloud 30,000 light-years wide choking galaxies

For the first time, astronomers have stumbled across ancient, ginormous clouds of carbon ions, stretching more than 30,000 light-years across and enveloping young galaxies. The team, led by Seiji Fujimoto, an egghead at Denmark's University of Copenhagen, had no idea these types of structures even existed, since they have not …

  1. herman Silver badge

    Electrictric universe

    Clearly, the electric universe is powered by coal fired power stations...

    1. Rich 11 Silver badge

      Re: Electrictric universe

      Not to mention the giant cosmic wind turbines suspended above the black hole jets.

    2. bombastic bob Silver badge
      Trollface

      Re: Electrictric universe

      let's send a bunch of coal miners to go get it

      1. HildyJ Silver badge
        Holmes

        Re: Electrictric universe

        It's clearly a job for Elon.

    3. Jellied Eel Silver badge

      Re: There's something VAG isn't telling us..

      Clearly, the electric universe is powered by coal fired power stations...

      Nah, it's just evidence that early space ships were diesel powered. Which explains why diesel tech was 'discovered' after the electric car. The only reason our overlords have flipped back to being pro-electric/anti-fossil is they knew these clouds were out there, and didn't want to be forced to pay vampire squids for carbon credits.

      But I reckon Greenpeace should build their very own B-Ark, load up and go investigate this terrifying, galaxy destroying menace. The carbon problem is obviously far worse than they thought*

      *Kidding. It's always worse than they thought, but fixable if we throw $100bn+ a year the NGO's way.

      1. nijam

        Re: There's something VAG isn't telling us..

        > It's always worse than they thought...

        It's never been as bad as they thought.

        1. Claptrap314 Silver badge

          Re: There's something VAG isn't telling us..

          Whoosh!

  2. Chronos

    The attack of the space yetis...

    That's quite a big carbon footprint right there.

  3. Jimmy2Cows Silver badge

    Carbon "pollution"

    No. It isn't. The carbon is clearly where it's meant to be (since it's, well, there). It's just being spread through the universe by natural processes which we, in this case, don't yet understand.

    I feel that using clickbait headline-grabbing terms like "carbon pollution" cheapens an otherwise interesting study.

    1. bombastic bob Silver badge
      Facepalm

      Re: Carbon "pollution"

      oh come on, it was FUNNY!

    2. Mike 125

      Re: Carbon "pollution"

      >Carbon "pollution"

      >No. It isn't. The carbon is clearly where it's meant to be (since it's, well, there).

      By your logic, pollution which exists, cannot exist! But yea, it's a bit odd to classify elemental carbon as such. It would be rather tragic if we successfully move to carbon-free, only to be fried alive by the unexpected arrival of a giant carbon fart.

      1. Fading Silver badge
        Facepalm

        Re: Carbon "pollution"

        Or by all plant life dying as CO2 levels drop below 150 ppm after being sequestered at the bottom of the ocean.........

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Is it pollution though ? Without carbon there wouldn't be carbon based life as we know it, thank your lucky stars so to speak.

    1. lglethal Silver badge
      Trollface

      Probably if you asked the silicon-based life forms, they would definitely agree that we carbon-based life forms are a type of pollution...

      1. Kane Silver badge
        Alien

        Only after spitting acid in your face.

      2. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge

        Not to mention the super-intelligent shades of the colour blue

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        >Probably if you asked the silicon-based life forms, they would definitely agree that we carbon-based life forms are a type of pollution...

        See what the plasma based lifeforms who live in stars that first dispensed us both from their anus think but as they live so very long it takes them aeons to reply we'll probably be extinct by the time we get an answer.

        1. Arthur the cat Silver badge

          See what the plasma based lifeforms who live in stars that first dispensed us both from their anus think

          "I'd give it a few gigayears if I were you."

  5. Primus Secundus Tertius

    Hydrides

    By far the commonest 'ordinary matter' (as opposed to 'dark matter') is hydrogen. Most of the carbon, nitrogen, and oxygen in the universe is found as their hydrides: methane, ammonia, and water.

    Carbon ions only in a very energetic environment, near a star or black hole.

  6. headrush

    Carbon is not a pollutant nor is it the cause of climate change. It is an element. The various compounds containing carbon can contribute to heat retention, CO2, CH4 etc.

    If carbon itself were the problem, the price of diamonds might plummet.

    1. Jellied Eel Silver badge

      #PantoCarbon

      Carbon is not a pollutant nor is it the cause of climate change.

      As it's that time of year*.. Oh yes it is! But there had always been a joke that politicians would find a way to tax the air we breathe. Then came Enron. Then came carbon trading. As carbon's a by-product of pretty much all human (and inhuman) activity, it's the perfect thing to tax or turn into financial instruments and profits.

      If carbon itself were the problem, the price of diamonds might plummet.

      Ah, well..

      https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2019-11-04/de-beers-cuts-diamond-prices-by-about-5-as-crisis-deepens

      But much like carbon trading, diamonds have oversupply problems and a rigged market. Safer to say something like a carbon crisis leading to invisible passengers on an overcrowded German train..

      *this year Madrid, next year, Glasgow! The fun never stops!

  7. Danny Boyd

    Filthy rich aliens?

    Man! They must have had a real s***load of fossil fuels there, mustn't they?

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    From Population III stars perhaps?

    They were the earliest and largest stars ever, and the pair instability supernova they end might account for all the carbon since they may not last long enough to fuse everything to heavier elements.

  9. John Mangan

    The Currents of Space?

    Isaac Asimov

  10. David Roberts
    Coat

    Dark Matter?

    Carbon is black. At least, carbon black is.

    That is pretty damn dark.

    So - dark matter!

    .

    .

    .

    .

    I wonder which pocket the Nobel Prize is in?

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