back to article Guess who the Co-op Bank chose for £141m outsourcing deal? Can't be. Yes, it's Capita

The Co-operative Bank has renewed its mortgage servicing contract with Capita, handing the controversial outsourcer £141m over six years. Capita's existing contract with the Bank for its mortgage servicing operation was signed in August 2015 for £325m and was originally due to end in 2025. However, Capita faced potential …

  1. Tilda Rice

    "Jon Lewis, chief exec of Capita, said of the renewal: "This is testament to a new Capita, which is working more collaboratively with its clients, and is strongly aligned to the Bank’s values as a responsible business."

    Gees, what waffle. How do these twerps get the tops jobs.

    The banks values are around not trading with entities in occupied territory, nor businesses that impact the environment bla bla.

    Capita can't align to that, as they don't invest. They should probably just gone on with "working more collaboratively with its clients" which is waffle for, actually do a good job this time.

    1. macjules
      Facepalm

      He gets the job because he is brilliant at totally unprepared double-waffle speak, whether it be in a Commons committee room or bank press release. But to break it down further:

      "This is testament to a new Capita": The same old Capita

      "working more collaboratively with its clients": Charging more

      "strongly aligned to the Bank’s values": Providing less and charging even more

      "a responsible business": Ever ready with an excuse for why the project failed

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Paul Flowers

    We'll this is the same bank that had a crackhead as a chairman.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Paul Flowers

      >We'll this is the same bank that had a crackhead as a chairman.

      AKA the Crystal Methodist, you've got to love red tops they do come up with some pearlers from time to time.

      1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

        Re: Paul Flowers

        "AKA the Crystal Methodist, you've got to love red tops they do come up with some pearlers from time to time."

        Well, they each get a chance for gold every day. And even a stopped clock is right twice a day :-)

  3. Pascal Monett Silver badge

    "testament to a new Capita"

    We'll see how long that sentence can stand.

    Capita certainly needs a turnaround, just be sure to not do a 360° by mistake.

    1. awoze
      Coat

      Re: "testament to a new Capita"

      what's wrong with overachieving?

    2. Chris G

      Re: "testament to a new Capita"

      Presumably Crapita offers benefits that are difficult to pass by.

  4. Dan Watson

    Capita will also be working alongside a third party over inflating the price of and fucking up a new IT platform for the bank, it said in a statement.

    There, fixed it for you.

  5. John70

    Crapita must have some good snake oil salespeople working for them...

    It's a wonder why companies still use them when they always years late with a project, over budget and/or in litigation for violation of service contract.

    1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

      The other options probably include the likes of the other big services outsources such as IBM. Maybe it's just a choice of going with what appears to be the least worst option available at the time?

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