My £91 million bid
My company, 'Statingtheblobvious Plc' which was fully incorporated in the US free state of Greenlandia at least 2 days ago, and has no connection whatsoever to 'DeliveringcheapPizzas Plc' apart from our websites both being developed by my nephew as a GCSE woodwork project, is prepared to carry out the Brexit Satellite feasibility project for £91 million, thus saving the government a 1/30th of a Grayling quid.
Our bid is comprehensive, involving as it does the appointment of several leading advisers on generous salaries (might suit retired civil servant or politician). We will also ensure ample stakeholder engagement through dinners at key high profile networking events (venues to include Wimbledon, Twickenham, Wembley and Monaco) and at the governing parties' annual conference. Obviously we will be taking key government stakeholders to look at potential launch facilities - in Florida and on various Caribbean and Pacific Islands. Finally we have already written the final report so are well ahead of the game:
'An independent satellite positioning system for the UK is vital to our global outward looking trade ethos. It will support the high tech industry of (add Defence Minister's constituency here . Ed) and offers multiple opportunities for international collaboration. We have already signed up Ruritania as a full partner (subject to us doing all the design and manufacture in their highly competitive sweatshops). All that is required is for you to post us a cheque for £1Billion for the next stage feasibility study to PO Box 1234 New Nuuk, USA'.