Naked women cleaning biz smashes patriarchy by introducing naked bloke gardening service Lazy perverts of all genders, get in here. Australia has the household service for you. Bare All Cleaning, which sends women round to do chores in the buff, has hit back at claims of sexism by rolling out a gardening service performed by naked blokes. No, not that kind of gardening service. Actual gardening, like... hedge …
Careful with that hedge trimmer...
Reminds me of the last time I had to call the friendly local exterminator. His previous job that day was to deal with a wasp's nest at an upper class middle aged lady (with too much time on her hands). She was enjoying observing how her (20+ years younger) gardener trims the hedge in nothing but shorts. Everything was fine until he threw the hedge-trimmer to the side and rushed into the house nearly ending up on top of her.
Her moderately dirty dream was not to be though. He was not running to her. He was running away from a one foot in diameter wasp nest he whacked with the hedge trimmer. That was what the exterminator had to deal with after that.
So frankly, hedge trimmer... in the buff... That is not advisable. A week tops until you run into a wasps' nest in mid-summer.
@LucreLout.: Exactly so. Also much of the local vegetation is mammal hostile. Lastly, Oz has highest skin cancer rate in world. I cant see how Work Cover/Work Safety laws do not demand protective clothing as sun exposure is rated as a risk. This spring has been the worst I recall for early active snakes. The western browns in my yard are bigger than usual and more aggressive than usual. I suspect these new "services" are more for patio plants in the high rise hells the chattering classes eulogise.
Wait, that would mean the neighbors get an eyeful every time the fern gets water (assuming the fern is not too large). Umm, how would it be if a bunch of like-minded neighbors got together and hired a stark nekkid fern botherer's breezy services, to be rotated between them in turn? Talk about gaming the system!
it's only sexist because a member of the political correctness police SAYS so.
No, its sexist 'cos they got it the wrong way round.
I'd imagine lady commentards (c'mon, both of you help me out here, please?) would enjoy the concept of a naked Chippendale doing the housework rather than gardening, and (speaking for myself) I'd not want a naked woman doing housework, I'd rather she was mowing the lawn, whilst I sat in fat, greasy splendour, downing a cold lager admiring the dignity of the human form in manual labour.
@Ledswinger
"I'd imagine lady commentards (c'mon, both of you help me out here, please?) would enjoy the concept of a naked Chippendale doing the housework rather than gardening"
Actually, ladies /did/ enjoy seeing naked (well, topless) "Chippendales" doing building/gardening and ironing.
Naked Builders featured twice on GMTV about 8 years ago, and on the back of that was Naked Ironing in Cheshire.
@ledswinger A naked gardener isn't high on my list of interesting things - possibly because I live in a top floor apartment with no garden. A naked Chippendale doing the housework? Actually I'd settle for any body else doing the housework to be honest.
I met a couple who'd set up a naked butler service in Glasgow a few years ago (they offered to hire my mate's son). All their staff wore an appropriate butler's apron, which the hiring customer was *not* permitted to touch or move, it was actually a lot more appealing than the fully naked version.
"If women what to make their money that way why is it sexist?"
It's not so much the nudity that's sexist as the work allocation. If naked cleaning (ironing, cooking* etc...) ladies was considered sexist, the answer is to provide naked cleaners of whatever gender. And if they want to expand their service to gardening, they can provide naked gardeners of whatever gender. Having naked cleaning ladies (but no male cleaners), and nakes male (but not female) gardeners is sexist.
Otherwise I agree that as long as people do it willingly, are not abused on the job and are fairly compensated, they should be free to choose whatever they do.
*PS I would have though naked cooking rather unhygienic, no?
"I would have though naked cooking rather unhygienic [...]"
As long as anything that comes into contact with food is clean then it doesn't matter what you wear or not.
Skin is generally cleaner than materials like wool or cotton etc. A TV crew were filming for a documentary about bacterial contamination in the average house. Kitchen wooden chopping boards were worse than a toilet seat. They then managed to get a massive reading - off the crew's woolly microphone windsock.
As pointed out elsewhere - spitting fat is best avoided when cooking. I always wear a pinafore style apron to protect the front of my torso whether clothed or not.
The UK NHS has told doctors to wear short-sleeved, open-neck shirts to reduce the risk of patient cross contamination from material contact..
"If naked cleaning (ironing, cooking* etc...) ladies was considered sexist, the answer is to provide naked cleaners of whatever gender."
Yeah, where's my cute boy cleaning the kitchen in a naked apron, dammit?!
(I think ordering these services may result in my trouble.)
What a surprise, a male-dominated readership is in favour of the idea of naked female cleaners.
It's sexist, just off the bat, because their cleaning service only supplies female workers. That means their hiring policy is sexist. We don't even have to go into the crass objectification of women to see it demonstrably sexist.
For that matter, a gardening business which only hires/supplies male gardeners would be sexist. Why can't I have a naked male cleaner or a naked female gardener?
Perhaps less important than debating the definition of 'sexism' here is just to comment on crass objectification and the general awfulness. Because really, how many of these cleaners do we think are happy for a bit of cash-in-hand for extra services (it has to be cash in hand, they have no pockets).
And for all those men rushing in to gallantly defend and empower women's rights to do what they want with their bodies (for your pleasure), you're happy for your wife/daughter to do those things? If not then you're not defending women's rights, you just like the fantasy of a woman with her jugs out as she cleans.
All those flying pieces of bush and whatnot? That is not going to feel good. I hope they get to wear some sort of smock or something the block the debris as they work.
And Australia gets a lot of sun, right? I'm worried about too much UV exposure and the skin cancer rates of these poor workers.
"[...] after it was hit by a stone thrown up by a rotavator."
Rotary lawn mowers - hover or wheeled - can eject stones at high speed. So can strimmers. Legs are the most likely danger zones - so reasonably loose-legged long trousers are recommended.
In England it is perfectly legal to do your gardening naked. However if you have prudish neighbours who call the police then the latter may ask you not to do it or risk a charge of behaviour that could cause a breach of the peace.
The interesting thing about that is they are prosecuting the innocent party - to avoid an aggressive neighbour causing a ruction. No wonder some people think that threatening violence will get them what they want.
'Does give new relevance to the concept of a "walled garden," don't it?'
When I lived in Cupertino in late 90s there was a strong local campaign to maintain and enfoce the local "single storey houses only" planning regulations against the dangers of mezzanines and loft rooms etc to prevent the possibility that people in their "yards" could be spied on by neighbours. So maybe "walled garden" really is a Cupertino thing.
A rich couple are arguing about their outgoings
He: Well if you're weren't so lousy in the kitchen we wouldn't need to hire a cook
She: Well if you weren't lousy in the bedroom we wouldn't need to hire a gardener.
(sexist maybe but I heard it from a female comedian)
You're spot on, almost. :)
I don't really clean, that's what my cleaner does, I tidy up after myself by which I mean, picking stuff up and putting things away, in the laundry hamper, filling the dishwasher that sort of thing. I'd be a proper messay bugger if I didn't have a cleaner.
My mum is like that. The home help likes her because they only have to /clean/ rather than tidy, then clean.
Meanwhile most of the students here where I work seem to think the cleaner's job is to pick up their chip packets and empty coffee cups (it isn't - their job is to clean grime and spills and such normal detritus of everyday living, not to clear tables of litter!)
I was wondering why you'd get a naked cleaner if you didn't have sexual ideas about em...
And remembered the classic Seinfeld ep where he starts sleeping with his cleaner, who stops doing a thorough job.
But then you have George getting the non-beautiful PA to thwart his male urges... Only to bone her, promising a raise!
"I was wondering why you'd get a naked cleaner if you didn't have sexual ideas about em..."
People spend their money and time on many things that are not essential to them staying alive. They are whatever takes their fancy - usually either for status or a "reward" that gives them a feeling of pleasure. The fashion and entertainment industries are just about 100% driven by that motivation.
Having a flower garden is a discretionary spend. Employing a gardener is therefore one further expense of doing that. Adding some entertainment novelty is just another apparently unnecessary expense that they want to afford.
"And remembered the classic Seinfeld ep where he starts sleeping with his cleaner, who stops doing a thorough job."
... but, IIRC, its all tied in with the middle class angst over employing "servants" which Seinfeld already has over employing the clenaner so he then justifies sleeping with her by deciding that at that point she's a girlfriend and not a cleaner and when he later complains about the standard of the cleaning the cleaner replies that she thought he saw her as a girlfriend and not a cleaner.
It's like inviting the nearly naked people you see in National Geographic into your residence to do everyday drudgery.
Good nudity has a context. It's hard (but not that type of hard) to fathom the viewing of household chores done in the nude, as the most efficient means of getting visual pleasure and/or a day's work done.
Keep the nudity fun, not laborious.
"It's like inviting the nearly naked people you see in National Geographic into your residence to do everyday drudgery."
Many years ago a team from somewhere like Borneo were set up in London with a commission to build one of their traditional houses in a museum over a period of several weeks. They dressed as they had back home and used their traditional tools. They quite happily navigated from their accommodation to the museum via the novelty of the Underground.
Unfortunately Google cannot find a link to which museum it was. I think it was mentioned by David Attenborough in one of his reminiscences.
to non-discrimination requirements, unless there are already loopholes that allow hospitality industry to refuse to employ "unattractive" workers...
Every other industry that HR have got their fangs into seems forced to employ unsuitable and incompetent recruits, then try to mitigate the harm by increasing management.
"[...] employ unsuitable and incompetent recruits, then try to mitigate the harm by increasing management."
employ unsuitable and incompetent recruits, then try to mitigate the harm by increasing management with unsuitable and incompetent recruits.
FTFY
How about sending some of these T-Shirts to the Window Cleaning Operatives?
https://www.theregister.co.uk/2014/10/21/lohan_t_shirts/
https://www.theregister.co.uk/2002/01/10/register_merchandise_jan_sale/
A friend of mine paints cars, motorbikes, guitars, whatever. He told me that when it's a hot summer he paints naked. The other option is to turn fans on (streaks the paint) or open windows (lets insects in).
I'm sure you could get a ventilation system that doesn't streak the paint, but he's a one-man-band and I imagine that would be quite bespoke (pricey).
He also used to work with a trainee who kept wearing aftershave that interfered with the paint... And no, I wouldn't want to see him working naked.
"I tried to start a naked computer repairs business up years ago."
I've always found that being naked is good antistatic protection.
In the office on my own one evening I stripped down to my cotton underpants while building my Motorola 6800 evaluation board. I had become paranoid after destroying several expensive FET small signal UHF transistors - in the days when they arrived with only a clip round the leads as static protection.
around here we have spinifex - needle like grass which causes festering sores as the tips of the grass break off and remain in the wound,
Bush Tomatoes - covered in very fine spines,
Mimosa bushes - invasive weed species with spikes/thorns up to 10cm long (according to business.queensland.gov.au website..)
and that's just the first 3 I can remember the names of
What kind of gardening are they doing, trimming some bushes and plucking some fruits?
My brother runs a lawn care service on the side in Florida. It is a dirty, sweaty job that is the antithesis of sexy. Just normal mowing, even with a catcher bag, produces a cloud of dust and grass duff that gets everywhere. The cloud of lawn shrapnel gets more exciting when the yard's owner has a dog, which tend to leave fragrant landmines for the mower to trigger.
And sweat - it was cost effective for him to buy a hotel-scale ice maker to fill his ice chest rather than collecting drinks and 10 pounds of ice from a store every morning.
The whole point of not being sexist is that men and women are treated the same. Providing women to do the cooking and cleaning and men to do manly things with tool outdoors is still just as sexist as only providing one of them. The non-sexist way to do it would simply be to provide anyone who is willing and able to do the job without worrying about what gender they might be. You know, exactly the same way non-naked cleaning and gardening services work. If customer demand or the pool of willing workers happens to favour one thing over another that's not an issue, but stating up front that you'll only allow girls to do one job doesn't get balanced out by only allowing boys to do something completely different.
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