The Register Lecture: How to build your own tractor beam

Levitation and tractor beams are the stuff of science fiction legend. Think Marty McFly’s hoverboard from Steven Spielberg’s Back to the Future II in 1989, or any number of Star Trek episodes. The real-world application of such technology, however, has been limited by the size of the object you can control. Until now, as a …

[Paul Herber]

Oi can't read and Oi can't write,

but Oi don't care

'cos Oi comes from ******shire

and Oi can droive a tractor beam.

[Anonymous Coward]

Well, I've got a brand new warpdrive harvester and I'll give you the key.

[macjules]

Oi’ve seen a cow grin and and even seen a sheep smile, but Oi never seen no tractor beam.

[Chemical Bob]

Re: Oi never seen no tractor beam

Next time lube the rear end first...

[Daedalus]

40MHz ultrasonic waves

I don't think so. Try 40 kHz.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: 40MHz ultrasonic waves

Certainly not for bats at least, as a quick google lookup would have told you. Biology is generally not compatible with MHz range physics anyway.

[The Man Who Fell To Earth]

Re: 40MHz ultrasonic waves

Yes, the paper clearly states 40kHz. What's 3 orders of magnitude among friends?

[MikeGH]

event buy link appears broken

[Anonymous Coward]

missing a "6" on the end:

https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/the-register-lecture-how-to-build-your-own-tractor-beam-tickets-44408017576

You're welcome.

[diodesign]

It's been fixed! Sorry about that.

C.

[teknopaul]

new reg feature?

Right mouse click > edit > submit pull request -m "that'll be kilo not mega".

[Fading]

Weirding module here we come.....

Muad'Dib

[I ain't Spartacus]

Re: Weirding module here we come.....

That should spice things up nicely...

Coat? Sure. Mine's the one with the tube hanging off the front so I can drink my own re-cycled weewee.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Weirding module here we come.....

Muad'Dib doesn't need a weirding module !

[The Oncoming Scorn]

Re: Weirding module here we come.....

Errrrmm I hate to have to mention this....

"Kynes knelt, examined the leg seals. “Urine and feces are processed in the thigh pads,” he said, and stood up, felt the neck fitting, lifted a sectioned flap there. “In the open desert, you wear this filter across your face, this tube in the nostrils with these plugs to insure a tight fit. Breathe in through the mouth filter, out through the nose tube. With a Fremen suit in good working order, you won’t lose more than a thimbleful of moisture a day—even if you’re caught in the Great Erg.”"

[aregross]

Still won't work... in SPAAAACE! (where there's no air to couple the 40kHz sound waves)

[Oengus]

Beat me to it...

Now If I did the maths correctly a 36GHz radio wave gives a 0.83cm wavelength the similar to the wavelength of a 40kHz sound wave. I wonder if Electromagnetic waves can do the same as sound waves or is it the moving air that does the levitation like this.

[Mark 110]

Transporter (to pub) please?

Surely the transporter is the leap forward. What use is an attraction device (tractor beam) compared to being able to instantly transport oneself from work to pub!!

[The Oncoming Scorn]

Re: Transporter (to pub) please?

I teleported home one night With Ron and Sid and Meg.

Ron stole Meggie's heart away

And I got Sidney's leg.

[Lee D]

Re: Transporter (to pub) please?

Pull the pub closer.

[Chozo]

Happy Memories

I first became aware of the acoustic levitation phenomena many years ago at Hawkwind gig in a muddy field near Tewksbury. My friend was attempting to construct an oversize herbal cigarette using the only dry flat space he could find. The port of a subwoofer!

[Chris G]

Re: Happy Memories

Ah, Hawkwind and herbal cigarettes! It's hard to get times like that anymore.

On a more modern note; I don't suppose the good Doctor Marzo would consider a weekend lecture in Ibiza?

[Anonymous Coward]

Build one? Sod that.

I'll wait until they're pre-made and on the shelves at Maplin.

[zapper]

Is that before or after all the Maplin shops close?

[Lee D]

If Maplin's sold a tractor beam, that may well get them out of bankruptcy alone.

More likely though they'll sell you a cheap Chinese knockoff at 200% markup while a spotty teenager tries to get you to buy a box, some batteries and the windscreen for a Ford Anglia "to go with it".

[Overflowing Stack]

Lasers

Surely this could be done with laser beams? What? No? Oh, Frickin laser beams!

[emmawaston79]

Sonic tractor beams employ loudspeakers to create acoustic holograms that can hold, spin, and move items in midair. Researchers battled for years to lift items greater than half the sound's wavelength.

[Anonymous Coward]

Could you please rephrase the sentence "Regarding the transportation to the pub, may I request?"

One night, I teleported back home with Ron, Sid, and Meg.

Ron managed to win Meggie's heart,

While I ended up with Sidney's leg.